I fucking hate pickles

[ID: a photo of a chandelier with lava lamps installed in place of candles or light bulbs. End ID]

I'm at a :.|:; for words.

“This time will be different,” I tell myself as I prepare to go see Revenge of the Sith for the umpteenth time. “This time there will be no Order 66. Instead after Obi-Wan kills Grievous, Cody and Obi-Wan celebrate the end of the war with a sloppy makeout session followed by 45 minutes of sucking and fucking.” 😌😌

Update: there was no makeout session. No fucking. Not even any sucking. I’m inconsolable 😔😔

Why is there no man arching his back with his butt in the air emoji

back in my day we just typed orz to make a little stick figure man doing that (or we would type or2 to give him a dumptruck). And we LIKED it that way!

Taking notes 📝

a court of thorns and roses. ballad of songbirds and snakes. bowl of macaroni and cheese

Sorry kitten, daddy fucked with the forces that our eyes can't see and now the darkness has a hold on me

when i was a young boy i had the philosophy of ‘balls are the boobs of the penis so its ok that i want to suck on them it doesn’t make me gay” and tbh i was cooking

to see a marching band