man i WISH you could die from heartbreak. way better than whatever the fuck this shit is
#not gonna find someone like that again#and it was housed inside a coward#how so you write books and not know how to communicate#left on read all weekend after saying i suggested good plans and you would take a look later#is it because i asked who usually gets invited to the private art galleries. did i sound resentful because i wasnt invited#or because i didnt drive all the way to dc in the name of uncertain plans#where the hell do i find another guy who talks like that but who doesnt disappear before a first date#i wanted to eat him alive in the first few days i knew him so i wish i knew what i could have done because i would have done a lot#even if you tell me it wasnt me i still cannot accept the idea the someone who tried so hard to impress me would evaporate without good reas#on#AHHHHHHHH and the thyroid meds and adderall balancing and staying up late for a meeting didnt help me look attentive#my happy little future... i could have done so much to make him happy too#even as a friend i could have talked with him in ways i cant talk with anyone else#he had gray hair and glasses and was only a year older and spoke so eloquently and wore suits that fit him like wtfffff i fumbled worse than#ill ever fumble again
