Puff-Tail Studio & Design (PTSD)
It took me 30 years to realize that I was truly unhappy in my life. I didn't have a lot, but I had enough. My depression and overeating were becoming a problem, and by the end of my 30th year my body decided to shut itself down. I was barely eating, not getting great sleep, and I worked in the most depressing office environment you can think of. I don't blame it, I would've shut down to if I could.
I was trying my hardest to just keep going, and I promised myself that something was going to change in 2020. I started the year with a semi positive attitude, and then a global pandemic hit. I don't need to go into all the sad details. A metric fuck ton of people had it way worse than I did, I do know this. But, it shook up my life in a way I would've never imagined.
I know, what does this have to do with art or PTSD? I'm getting there, I promise!
When I lost my job (ok quit my job...) due to the pandemic I realized that all of this terrible stuff was happening, but somehow I was starting to feel better. Not every day, in fact not most days, but there were days where I was sure everything was going to be alright. My 31st birthday came and went, and this time I was ending the year more positive than I began the year, but that dark cloud hovering above my head wasn't done just yet.
I'm going to gloss over my car accident, because it's still hard to talk about without getting real heckin' anxious, so here's the TLDR; I almost died, killed a friend, and killed a stranger all in a 10 second span. Luckily I was the only one who needed to be carried away on a stretcher, not that the others were in great shape but needless to say I was very happy that everyone was alive. Afterwards, I was left with a shattered collar bone and a lonely 3 months stuck out on the couch because I couldn't sleep in my own bed. It was hard/ 0 out of 10, do not recommend.
Other than crying and watching Twitch streamers endlessly for months, I also figured this art shit out babbbyyyyyy! Well, maybe not totally, but I'm a hell of a lot better than I was before the trauma!
I've done a lot of things in my life, bounced around from phase to phase. I was sure this digital art thing, and my desire to stream, would already be just another distant hobby that I'll pretend one day I'll go back to but then never does. But for about 2 years now I can honestly say I want nothing more than to be creative in any capacity. I want to create content, bottom line. I don't want to be famous, and I know I'll probably always have to have some sort of "real" job, but I don't give a shit anymore. I am an 80's baby sure, but I'm a fuckin' 90's kid and we don't fuck around. We keep our feelings to ourselves and then cry about it on the internet!
OH! so why Puff-Tail Studio & Design, you ask? I think the initials being PTSD speak for themselves, but the sweet puffy gray kitty in that logo is my anxious baby Jonesy. He had a rough start in life, and has some serious mommy issues, but he does have the perfect scaredy cat form. You know, long legs, arched back, puffed up tail? We call it PTJ for Puff-Tail Jones.
And, why a studio? I simply do not want to keep rebranding every time I'm unhappy with something, or if I think Kitty_Sniffles is not the right call... I just want to do whatever I want. So I am creating this "studio" where all of my ridiculous ideas and re-brands can live forever and ever.
The projects I want to focus on this summer are: 1. getting my vtuber art finished and stream set up. Kitty_Sniffles is coming to life babbyy! 2. My Etsy page needs to be a thing, or whatever I decide to use for art sales. I need to get it done! 3. Get a real commission page set up with all my commission info, and hopefully get some commissions lolol and 4. COSPLAY! I've always wanted to, and now I need to!
Thank you for reading, or skimming, or glossing over.. regardless I am glad you stopped by, and I hope you'll stick around to see what's next!
