Captured by a group of Robo-ritualists

do you think when they release the anchor it bonks a fish on the head sometimes . sorry thats probably sad to think about. maybe jf we imagine the funny coconut bonk sound and the fish is only a little annoyed. lets keep it PG no blood. they have a date at the anemone fields tomorrow it wouldnt be fair. oh fuck a second anchor

shout-out to whoever it was who regularly dribbled a basketball for hours on end immediately above my bedroom

In college my roommate was, literally, pounding meat to tenderize it. Apartment of dudes on the floor below us came to ask us if we were okay lmao

Shoutout to my neighbor who seemingly makes a whole brass band tumble down the stairs every night at 11:30pm.

Shoutout to my former neighbours who would make popcorn and then have sex at the same time every day.

hey sorry your boyfriend fell into the public library book donation bin. yeah he’s being used to fund vital community programs and support services. yeah beanbag chairs too. if you pay your overdue fines we’ll give him back though

my buddies' grand viziers don't tell them shit about plots that are happening and it makes me seriously question their judgement. i know because my grand vizier told me. he kicks ass

Would you rather live in the little house that's dry or the big house in the background that's flooded?

light yagami had the choice between an emo girl boyfriend and an emo boy girlfriend and he choose NEITHER. so frankly im glad his gay ass is dead

ppl will conflate ‘children’s media’ w ‘bad/shallow media’ and then when they come across a bit of children’s media that’s good they’ll be like ‘aha this isn’t actually for kids!! loophole.’

this sentiment always reminds me of my grandfather, who would say that he hated musicals and then my grandmother would be like ‘but you love Gilbert and Sullivan’ and he’d insisted that Gilbert and Sullivan made OPERAS, thank you ):<

anyway. ‘Spirited Away’ is a children’s film. ‘The Little Prince’ is a children’s book. ‘A Wizard of Earthsea’ is regarded as a classic in its genre and a children’s book. its completely fine to continue enjoying children’s fiction as an adult and also, to be blunt, children deserve fiction that is good and has important things to say about the world.

hey um i’ve got some bad news. we mulled your boyfriend. he fell in the wine and we mulled him. yeah with the cinnamon sticks.

a gnome would make this post

how the fuck did this bastard learn to teleport