57 Magpies In A Suit

fuuuck I could use a mysterious benefactor right now

identifying a maladaptive coping mechanism is so bitter sweet like that’s great now i know what i need to stop doing. but that’s literally my something

ok guys but imagine how hard it's gonna hit if something good ever happens again

Working a job will have you thinking shit like "in two hours I will only have four more hours to go which is 240 minutes or 16 segments of 15 minutes which is like two two hourses"

it's fine i don't even need to be part of social groups or friend groups anyway (giant hole appears in my chest spontaneously) ? what's that

but ykw at least i'm not on mount everest. at least i'm not paying tens of thousands of dollars to slowly suffocate in a 300-person line at the gates of hell. never in my life will i have to be steered in a hypoxic stupor through the maze of poop and corpses atop mount everest. on this earth a lot of horrible things can happen to you without your permission but there are a few that you have to opt into. you can just say no thanks! and be guaranteed never to have to be on mount everest. much to be grateful for actually

there desperately needs to be a separate option to report ads for hijacking your touch screen or automatically launching your browser/app store the moment you scroll past it. "malicious" is not a strong enough word. i need the "go fuck yourself and die in a pit of boiling acid x10000" option

marriage before thirties is so insane because you're barely a person yet

divorce before thirties however is chic beyond comprehension

*trying not to doxx myself* shoutout to that one thing in a place somewhere

I went out in 3 different outfits and strangers complimented me on every one. Are people really this nice or am I just beautiful 🤨