behind our efforts

• wick — arcturus beaming (“this blinding light, this reckoning / there’s more to life than suffering / but there’s still time / it’s not too late / nothing will change until i change”)

• tyranny — scars (“we were fucked from the start”) (“was i born with a hole in my heart?”) (“but i couldn’t help you build it, and i dont know why”)

• kattigan — black hole fantasy (“even in my fantasy, i cant commit to believing / that I’ll get what i want, im afraid of what i want”) (“the months blur together / i watch the ceiling buckle / i wonder when it’s caving in”)

• teor — can’t go back (“you can’t always be trying to dig up / what you’ve already buried”) (“it’s not fair (when have you ever known the world to be fair?)”)

• julien — not the ghost (“if only i could break the chain of disappointment weighing me down / shake off the ghosts that whisper warnings whenever you’re not around / i won’t be afraid of all the things that i wanted”)

• thaisha — the garden (“put your ear to my heart, or set your teeth against my throat / give me something pretty to wear beneath my bloodstained clothes / my darling, the devil knows my name”)

• vaelus — time will change you (“someday / time will change you / you’ll leave behind what doesn’t move / time will change you / we all outgrow our roots”)

• occtis — turn out the lights (“a running list of all your doubts and your dead ends”) (“what good has ever come of it, what answers will you find?”)

• azune — scars (“all the love, all the kindness, all your best laid plans / couldn’t stop me from becoming the way that i am”) (“maybe born in a storm beneath an angry sky”)

• hal — allies or enemies (“now you’re not so quick to forget / are we allies or enemies? / this will be the death of me x2 / all is fair in love, and war / but i cant fight with you anymore”)

• murray — hard sell (“im one deep breath away from a breakdown / my nerves are wrecked and coming unbound”) (“is it me? is it really just me? does everybody have it together, or are we all just pretending?”)