good luck

I needed a good laugh 🤣

their energy is immaculate

my friend took in a stray and she’s the cutest kitty ever but he named her oil so whenever he sends a picture of her me and my other friends look like we’re roleplaying as the US military

learning that people want you in their lives is a skill you can develop if it does not come naturally

it feels fake but your friends miss you sometimes

the reason you've been hanging out with your closest friends fairly regularly for the past 12+ years is because you have fun together

people who don't like you that much will not stay in your life for over a decade asking to hang out and inviting you to things and texting you

i mean this from the bottom of my heart: no one is impressed by your loud ass car. actually we talked about it and we all want you dead.

I say “oh don’t worry he doesn’t bite” and you’re confused because you don’t see any dog but then you notice a single inchworm moving purposefully across the floor towards you at an alarming pace

My car is experiencing mitosis

my blood looks more beautiful than yours it's a more luscious red

edward cullens not gon a fuck you babe

you've picked the right target you're just a decade late this would've ruined me at sixteen

The only thing worse than no pockets is fake pockets (because of the betrayal)

At least I don't have a tumblr