Arthur is late one morning to breakfast. Guenevere doesnât think too much about it; heâs cheerful as usual, apologizes even though she tells him he doesnât have to. (She doesnât have to say Youâre the king. She doesnât say I donât mind waiting for you.) Breakfast proceeds as usual, and itâs not until itâs over that she notices something is wrong.
He standsâpractically bounces out of his chairâand then sways, very slightly. He catches himself on the table. Guenevere doesnât miss the way he swallows and stares at the plate heâs left behind.
âYour majesty,â she says, watching his face, âare you well?â
Now his head snaps up. âPerfectly,â he says, smiling, and his eyes are brightâtoo bright, she thinks. She opens her mouth to protest, but he announces, âMy good queen, today we are going to change the world, just wait and see.â
âIâll be waiting and watching,â she says wryly as they start down the hall. He takes her hand as they walk along, which sends a flash of surprise through herâbut she doesnât say anything more. Sometimes he is impulsive in his affections, her king, like when he leaves flowers on her vanity, or when he asks her favorites in the middle of a conversation. Itâs endearing, the way he flits from thing to thing, and always with that boyish grin when she surprises himâ
Suddenly he presses her hand very hard. When she looks up at him, his face is pale. âYour majesty, what is it?â she asks.
He smiles, but itâs clearly painful. âGenny,â he whispers, and then heâs falling against her, almost collapsing but his boots are scuffing the floor, trying to find his footing. She struggles to hold his weight up, wraps her arms around him like a desperate loverâs embrace.
âYour majesty? Your majesty,â she says urgently. âArthur, whatâs wrong? Are you going to faint?â
He huffs a laugh against her hair, reaching outwardsâfor the wall, she realizes, and tries to guide him so he can lean against the stone instead of her poor support. âI must confess,â he says, voice weak, âI do feel a little lightheaded.â
âWell, sit down,â she demands, masking imperiousness over her panic. âIâveâIâve heard itâs good to put your head between your legs. Itâll get the blood flowing to your head.â
He slides down the wall, still grasping her hand tightly, and she does her best to help him settle, sitting down beside him. After a moment he takes a deep breath and raises his head to look at her. âWell,â he says, âI donât suppose Iâm going to the Table this morning.â
She wants to scoff at him, but he looks so miserable, even smiling. âYouâre quite flushed,â she notes, reaching for his face; and then, feeling it, âOh, Arthur, youâre burning up.â
âNot literally, I hope,â he says, âbecause I feel quite cold.â
âArthur,â she says. âStop making jokes.â
âDo you know, this is the most youâve called me by my name instead of your majesty?ââand there is a tease in his voice but his eyes, though fever-touched, are soft.
Footsteps round the hall, and Guenevere turns away. âOh, Sir Kay,â she says with some relief, as the knight stops and looks at his sovereigns sitting against the wall. âThe king is ill. Would you please help him back to his rooms?â
âCertainly, your majesty,â Kay intones. Arthur groans as the knight hauls him off the floor. âNot sure I was up for standing yet, Kay,â he manages, and Kay slings an arm around his shoulders.
âPlease rest, your majesty,â Guenevere says.
He smiles; heâs always smiling. âGo to the meeting, Genny,â he says. âYou know all the policy. Go change the worldâsince Iâm not fit to do it today.â
âMake sure he actually lies down,â she tells Kay. Kay, already looking beleagueredâperhaps familiar with the kingâs flightinessânods.
She watches them for a moment, then shakes herself. Nothing to do but go to the meeting alone.
Itâs a few hours into the meeting and sheâs half-heartedly listening to Lionel and Sagramore argue for the twentieth time that morning when Sir Kay slips into the room. She meets his eyes with a smile, expecting him to take his seat at the Table, but instead he makes his way behind her to speak in her ear.
âYour majesty,â he says quietly.
âSir Kay,â she murmurs, trying to keep her eye on Lionel as he gesticulates wildly. âHow is the king?â
âHeâs asked for you,â Kay says. âRepeatedly.â
She looks at him, astonished, but keeps her voice low. âFor me? Whatever for?â
Kay looks uncomfortable. âHeâs very insistent, milady. He soundedâŠâ
Now the panic is beginning to creep up her chest again. âHe sounded what?â
âVery desperate,â he says. âMaâam.â
For a moment sheâs frozen, hearing Sagramoreâs reply but not comprehending any of the words. She has to make a choice.
âExcuse me,â she interrupts. Twelve heads swivel in her direction, and she clasps her hands in her lap as a way to keep hold of her composure. âThank you, gentlemen. Something urgent has come up that I must attend to.â
âIs everything all right, your majesty?â Dinadan pipes up.
Her first instinct is to lie, but she knows that if the kingâs illness is actually serious, sheâll have to tell them eventually. âI hope so, Dinadan,â she says carefully. She sweeps her gaze around the Table. âWeâll reconvene tomorrow at the same time.â
If the king is better, she doesnât say. She can see curiosity, doubt, maybe even hostility on some of the knightsâ facesâLionel looks particularly suspiciousâbut she turns her back on them and leaves the room.
Kay catches up with her in the hall. âMaâam.â
Annoyance rears its head; she had been relieved to be able to show her true feelings on her face walking alone. âYes, Kay, what is it?â
âI was just going to escort you, your majesty,â he says, undeterred by the irritation in her voice. He pauses. âAnd to tell youâyou did well in there.â
She glances up at him. He sounds genuine. And, now that his small kindness is extinguishing her frustration, she can admit that she likes him. Thereâs a steadiness about him, a quiet security that isnât threatened by ego, so unlike the other knights. She remembers suddenly that Kay is Arthurâs cousin, the same that led Arthur to pull the sword in an attempt to find a blade for a trivial tournament. He does not seem jealous of Arthurâs position; he does what his king asks, without complaint. And now, somehow knowing that she feels inadequate in this crisis, he compliments her. What a strange man.
âThank you,â she says, a bit awkwardly. They walk in silence for a few moments. âYou must love him very much,â she says finally, as they round a corner.
The twist of a smile. âOh, he makes me want to throttle him sometimes, your majesty,â he says. âBut. Yes. I do.â
âI havenât known him for nearly as long,â she says, fighting her own smile, âbut I feel much the same way.â
Sheâd meant the throttling, but he looks at her for a long moment. Whatever he sees in her face, he nods at. âIâm sure you do, maâam,â he says quietly.
Kay doesnât tell her anything more about the kingâs condition, just leads her to the door of the kingâs room and leaves with a bow. She has to shake off the sudden apprehension she feels standing in front of the door, alone. Arthurâs voice is coming faintly through the wood, and that must be a good sign. If he was silent, she reasons, pulling the handle, then she would know something was wrong. Perhaps her fears had been misplaced. Maybe he thought of an idea and simply had to share it with her. She will feel foolish for ending the meeting early, but there are worse things than feeling foolish.
She can see the king chattering at the physician as she approaches the bed. ââjust lie still, your majesty,â the physician is saying, sounding haggard, but he turns at her approach. âAh, my queen,â he greets, bowing hastily. âIâll leave youâI must get a few things from my apothecaryââ
He bustles out of the room before she can ask about the kingâs condition.
âYour majesty,â she says, turning to the bed, perching on the chair the physician had left behind. The king in nightclothes now, covered up to his waist by a thick quilt, but he doesnât look much better than he had in the hallwayâpale except for the color high in his cheeks, hair a little mussed. And, she notes, looking closer, not entirely present. Heâs quiet now, not looking at her, focused on something in the distance. Itâs a familiar expressionâwhen he is really deep in thought, heâll adopt the same look, standing still in the middle of a roomâmade chilling by the glassiness of his eyes.
âYour majesty,â she repeats, concerned, âyou were asking for me?ââand now he seems to hear her, because his head twitches and his eyes settle on her face.
âOh, Genny!â he cries. âMerlyn was telling me weâd lost the war in France, but I told him Iâd show you to him and prove him wrong. See, Merlynââand heâs looking away.
âYour majesty,â she says carefully, âthereâs no one here but us.â
He looks at her, blinks dazedly, and there, he seems to see her again. âYou are really here, arenât you?â he murmurs, soft, unsure, raising a hand slowly as if to touch her. âYouâre not something I dreamed up?â
Oh, and what if heâs gone mad? What if the fever has taken his brain and sheâs left to rule this stoic, cultureless country alone? She tries to take a deep breath. Fevers give terrible dreams sometimes, she reminds herself, and maybe this is something like that. âNo, your majesty,â she answers him.
âWe really did win the war in France?â His breath is shallower than usual. âSometimes I thought weâd be fighting forever, you know, just hacking away at the country until it was a bloody piece of meat. Iâm not very good with a spear but I can use a sword alright. I donât know how many people I killed. I donât ever want to know.â
She is stunned at how forlorn he sounds. âYou won the war,â she whispers. âYou won me.â
âAnd then we traded one kind of death for another,â he continues hopelessly, âexcept it was your death, because we took your choice from you. I canât begin to apologize for that, I canâtââ
The physician returns then, shattering the moment, and sheâs too much in shock still to do much of anything but get out of his way.
âYour majesty, you must rest,â he chides the king. âHere, take this, it will help you to sleepââ
He helps Arthur drink the foul-looking draught heâs brought from the apothecary. It must taste as bad as it looks, for Arthur makes a face. âMerlyn,â he mumbles.
âRest, milord,â the physician intones, gathering up his empty bottles on the nightstand. Guenevere watches as Arthur shuts his eyes. His brow smooths over. In moments, heâs asleep, vulnerable as a child.
âIs itââ she whispers, and the physician seems to realize sheâs still in the room. At his probing look she clears her throat softly. âIs it aâdangerous sickness?â
The physicianâshe finally remembers his name is Gaiusâsighs. âIt might not be,â he admits. âItâs the season for fever, milady. Several of the knights have had some form of it in the last few weeks.â
âBut,â he continues, looking more grave, âit is a higher fever than Iâve seen recently. Youâve seen his moments of delirium. If it doesnât pass in the next day or soââ
She has no thought for her expression, too caught in the tempest of worry building in her chest, but he must see something in her face because he stops and smiles, grandfatherly. âIâm getting ahead of myself,â he says.
âHis dreams,â she says woodenly, meaning to ask a question, not remembering what she had wanted to say. The physician nods as though she had made perfect sense.
âThe king has had vivid dreams just about as long as Iâve known him, your majesty. The fever seems to make them more palpable. Itâs not a particularly bad sign.â
She swallows, trying not to think about Arthurâs pained expression. âWhat can be done?â
Gaius gathers up his medicine kit. âWatch and pray, milady,â he says. âIâll send word if the king is better tomorrow.â