diana ♑

Today at therapy was really hard. I was sitting here crying, and generally being miserable, when I felt a nudge at my knee. I looked down to see that Zeus, my service dog, was doing his job… and brought me a potato. it is very hard to cry with a gift of potato.

That would be an empty pill bottle, the *correct* pill bottle, a bottle of embossing powder, and two, TWO potatoes.

There is nothing this man can’t do!

i cannot believe “if it fits, i sits” transcends boundaries in this way

We’re bros

update hes entirely yellow now

hes crawlin all over the place checking it out

its happening

??? caterpie doesnt evolve into kakuna

whats he doing

its happening part 2 For Real This Time

chicken nugget using those advanced tactics balancing my man doesnt do anything halfway

i put on some tunez for him so he can get into the metamorphazone

hes been chillin like this for a couple days 

HES BUSTIN OUT

🐛 💤 💤

hes gone goth hes in his emoteen stage

CHICKEN NUGGET IS A CHICKEN WING NOW BABY WE HAVE LIFTOFF!!!!!

working in retail

i’m pretty that everyone familiar with these movies has thought about this at least once

Language-based cheeky trolling is my fave kind of trolling…

I’d never, ever hurt a lady but I’d be happy to punch a feminist. It’d bring me great joy.

ready when you are

I’m 6’4” 228 pounds and have 9 years of combined martial arts training and 3 years of being a Line Backer in football. Just in case you are looking for variety.

what about a lady and a feminist. warning, combatives certified soldier.

im tiny, i’m like 5′4 and 130 lbs but u can fight me too

rip polly pocket paddle boat