The Winds of Change

yoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

FUCKIN YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

no BULLSHIT I KID YOU NOT! Look what I found while walking Home…..

OH MY GOD

OH MY F*CKIN GOD

THIS POST FUCKIN WORKS?!?!?! THIS IS PAST A COINCIDENCE NO WAY!??! NO FRIGGIN WAY!!! 

Auntie Steve sells Herbalife and is always trying to get everybody to come in under her and stop wasting their time at 9-5s. She looks put together, but all her clothes are SteinMart irregulars.

Technically, Auntie Joc is still married, but ever since she got that Pam from Total haircut, we’ve been waiting on the split and for her to move across town with a “roommate.”

Auntie Lenard went to Howard, reminds you every half hour, and does something in journalism or media and is always on vacation in the Caribbean. She got pregnant right after graduation — the relationship didn’t work out, but they still co-parent.

Auntie Jaheim not even your real auntie — she just live across the street from your grandmama and she always comes to her cookouts. Nobody knows how many kids she has or if her husband lives over there too. She’s either a school principal or a drug dealer — or both — but none of that matters because she makes the best ribs.

Auntie Snoop looks like this whenever you call her. She looks like this at the family reunion and at Family Dollar. She looks like this at church, at Golden Corral, and probably at work too. She drives a champagne-colored ’05 Toyota Camry with a bumper sticker that says My Son Made the Honor Roll at George Washington Carver Middle School, even though he been graduated and works for the post office now.  

Auntie Diddy is the head usher at Mt. Pisgah AME Zion Missionary Baptist Church. That’s her real hair, but it’s been the same length since you were born even though she’s always “trying to grow it out.”

Big Mama actually had Auntie Jigga when she was 13, so she basically like Big Mama Junior. All of her kids so old you forget they your cousins. She drives the biggest Buick you have ever seen.

Auntie Future been out the closet since the 80s and is happily married to Karen, an anthropology professor from up north somewhere. Auntie Future teaches sociology at the same school, Vassar or Bryn Mawr or something, one of them lesbian schools.

Auntie Steve sells Herbalife and is always trying to get everybody to come in under her and stop wasting their time at 9-5s. She looks put together, but all her clothes are SteinMart irregulars.

Technically, Auntie Joc is still married, but ever since she got that Pam from Total haircut, we’ve been waiting on the split and for her to move across town with a “roommate.”

Auntie Lenard went to Howard, reminds you every half hour, and does something in journalism or media and is always on vacation in the Caribbean. She got pregnant right after graduation — the relationship didn’t work out, but they still co-parent.

Auntie Jaheim not even your real auntie — she just live across the street from your grandmama and she always comes to her cookouts. Nobody knows how many kids she has or if her husband lives over there too. She’s either a school principal or a drug dealer — or both — but none of that matters because she makes the best ribs.

Auntie Snoop looks like this whenever you call her. She looks like this at the family reunion and at Family Dollar. She looks like this at church, at Golden Corral, and probably at work too. She drives a champagne-colored ’05 Toyota Camry with a bumper sticker that says My Son Made the Honor Roll at George Washington Carver Middle School, even though he been graduated and works for the post office now.  

Auntie Diddy is the head usher at Mt. Pisgah AME Zion Missionary Baptist Church. That’s her real hair, but it’s been the same length since you were born even though she’s always “trying to grow it out.”

Big Mama actually had Auntie Jigga when she was 13, so she basically like Big Mama Junior. All of her kids so old you forget they your cousins. She drives the biggest Buick you have ever seen.

Auntie Future been out the closet since the 80s and is happily married to Karen, an anthropology professor from up north somewhere. Auntie Future teaches sociology at the same school, Vassar or Bryn Mawr or something, one of them lesbian schools.

We are however significantly more likely to be victims of abuse, addiction, poverty, and suicide.