Mar(sh Creature)

i assumed this was porn

Wild caught clownfish will be like ‘hm you see, the anemone you got me is a slightly different color and tentacle width than the one I had back home, so I will not begin hosting it. I’ll be a sort of wandering ronin for the rest of my days.’ And then a captive bred clownfish will be like ‘ok so I have this curved rock I found and I just sit above it and it take care of me 👍’

#mybrick

This is painfully American

when we say "it is functionally impossible to parody Americans in a way that will actually insult them" this is the sort of thing you're up against. is your sick burn funnier than corporation burger clown sing national anthem baseball game? no?? of course it isn't.

has anyone noticed recently that it's expensive

times like these really make you appreciate pouring river water in your socks

a squirrel or perhaps a cardinal posted this

happy one year anniversary to the time i was in vermont in a dorm with a carbon monoxide leak and jacked off to this painting

sci fi is all about getting so scared and ripping tubes out of yourself. people miss this

sci fi is all about desperately trying to reclaim your violated bodily autonomy. it’s all about asserting that you are a being with agency, and you can choose what happens to your own person, even if that’s ripping tubes out of yourself. and also sometimes an alien is there