dressed like a daydream

Portia: I know it’s 3am, but come over and cook for me.

Portia: I think I sorta joined a cult last night... Do they usually involve orgies? Because if so then I definitely joined a cult last night.

Portia: I’m 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas. Is it correct? Probably not, but who cares? I own up to my incorrect but still amazing use of commas.

Portia: Can we talk?

Portia: I haven't turned into a walking dick, so if it hasn't happened to me then it most likely won't happen to you.

Portia: Switching positions should be a given, the same one gets boring after a while. I mean, not that I've been bored, but we don't want that to happen now, do we? I don't think a hat equals knowledge, does it?

Portia: You really do have a type, don't you? All three people I've seen you mention are a little on the quiet side. Artificial cherry is absolutely disgusting though, I completely agree. Which is why I was worried, but I was a little tipsy so maybe it was your neighbor's dorm.

Portia: Ugh, you read my mind. They really should get better beds in the dorms, especially considering some of us practically live in them.

Portia: Well, if I knew, I wouldn't be asking if you'd seen it and just telling you it was left behind. But I'll take your question as a no, and now I have no idea where it could be.

Portia: I refuse to imagine it, actually. Nor could I imagine having a baby for someone else! That just sounds absolutely dreadful.

Portia: I didn't keep count, tbh. I saw the word baby and checked out completely. Kind of says something about YOU if you did notice it. You aren't thinking about having one, are you?

Portia: I miss you, it's been far too long since we've had some quality girl time. We should really make up for that.

Portia: Have you seen my lucky bra? I seem to have misplaced it.

Portia: The last time I visited, your dorm smelled like cherries and regret. Anything you'd like to share?