Bellsies

I really hated the way the chapter ended, not because I think its bad writing (I think it's a really good way to continue the theme of the chapter) but because some years ago, someone I knew for a very long time and cared deeply about did something similar and they just disappeared from my life.

I think if you've ever been in that position, where someone you're close to, your best friend even starts that first relationship and you can see them fade away from you, even if you're happy for them, you can't help but turn it inwards and question if its your fault. If you'd smiled more, if you were nicer, if you didn't tease as much, maybe you spoke too much, maybe too little…if you had fixed that Something, this person who's precious to you wouldn't just leave you behind just because they found a romantic partner. It just makes you wonder "what about my love (and me) wasn't enough". I think it's one of those situations where it's really difficult not to hate yourself and hate them as well a little bit (maybe a lot) so I projected all of that in this comic.

I've seen a lot of different conversations about Susie's behaviour this chapter and like I think Toby and the team did a good job portraying her ngl. As much as it genuinely hurt me when she told Kris the two of them don't need to go to the lake anymore (like that was the worst part for me) I think it makes sense for her as a teen from a complicated background (at the very least) who's just witnessed the "truth" of what's supposed to happen to her and her friends to just, go full hog into something that feels better.

I don't think she has any intention of completely disappearing from Kris' life, I think she still cares about them A Lot, she's just falling into that age-old trap of trying to juggle two people she cares about and ending up possibly hurting one (maybe both in the future) of them(again I can't stop thinking about how much I would hype up the lake scenes to my friends because it felt like Kris really liked being there and now she tells me it will never happen again PAINNN PAINNNN).

Even if I think she's genuinely hurting Kris' feelings, I think it makes a lot of sense for her character right now.