per aspera ad astra

I just got done literally wailing over my job :^) like actual wails. I didn't know I could cry like that, I literally never have 

I have dead ass never heard myself make those sounds before 

I just hate being bad at shit. like I took on a bunch of extra work to try and keep the team moving forward, and all I'm getting is criticized ... like sorry I didn't update your chart hidden five subfolders deep, I was doing the job of 3 people????? like Jesus Christ please also remember you gave me 5 mins of training and just let me go at it 

and the accountant being mean was just like ... ok didn't need that 

I realized the issue is (forgive the Incel moment I'm about to have) that I haven't worked with enough women before, so I have no idea how to deal with the gossiping and passive aggressiveness. like. for my entire professional life I've been dealing with direct women and direct men. all of a sudden there's these passive aggressive women I have no idea how to handle???