My Tumblr. My Loves.

Learn About Bernie Sanders Sweeping Policy Platform To Combat Racial Inequality HERE.

Sanders addressed the issue in front of more than 20,000 supporters in Portland, drawing his largest crowd yet.

1) Someone getting a leg cramp, partner thinks they’re hurting them, the mood is gone. 

2) Cuddling that goes on forever, without long and intimate discussions. 

3) Bra or Belt being impossible to unfasten with one hand in the dark. Having to get the other person to do it.

4) Having to violently sneeze because someone’s hair just went up their nose. Or making faces because said hair went in their mouth. 

5) Trying to dramatically throw oneself onto the bed, ending up cracking their head against the wall or bedpost on accident. 

6) Start cuddling with the intention of going further, but someone falls asleep on accident and the other person doesn’t have the heart to wake them. 

7) Wriggling around trying to strip socks off with their toes, because their hands are busy doing other things, but ending up making everything worse. 

8) Pausing to shove an uncomfortable lump of blankets, or a discarded shirt out from under someone. 

9) Trying to sexy talk, but sounding really awkward and both parties burst out laughing. 

“I got it! I got it!”

Anyway I got to the car and my dad was there and he was like “how ya feeling son” in the dadliest way possible and I was like “MAN I AM PUMPED LETS GET SOME JUICE I’M STARVED” so we drove about 3 blocks to a jamba juice, whereupon I say “I’m good I can do this” and run/drunkstumble 30 feet to the door. I burst in the door like a viking returning from some fucking battle and holler “WHATS UP FUCKS” to everyone in the store, which was thankfully just the 2 people behind the counter, who looked probably as scared/confused as a jamba juice employee could look.

So anyway, as my dad explained the situation I looked up at the jamba juice menu and was utterly fucking lost in it. Like I swear I was looking at this menu board for a year, deciphering this Rosetta stone of fruits. I distinctly remember that I was looking at each item in a smoothie, thinking of how it tasted, then moving on to the next thing and thinking of how that tasted, and how they would taste together. Since most smoothies had 3 or 4 items, this took some thinking. So my dad sees me in this extreme brain blast state of mind and says “hey are you going to order or what”. Keep in mind I’m on the first fucking smoothie on the list here. So I just say “shush man I’m trying to do fruit science”, and then when I realized that this process could take literal years, I just said “yeah give me a smooth regular” which for the uninitiated, isn’t actually a real thing on any menu. Oh, also I asked them if the “boosted” smoothies would give me super powers and then pointed my fingers at them and made “lightning noises”.

So my dad just orders me the first thing on the menu and I go to sit down and stare out the window or some shit and my thoroughly amused dad just looks at me and says “how ya feelin?”. Now at this time I was feeling a lot of things, but most noticeable to me was the gauze in my mouth, so I just look at him and say “there’s these fuckin… tiny sheep in my head” which at the time was the best way I had to convey this feeling. Anyway about that time, the jamba juice guy brings us our drinks and he gives me a small thing of mario kart stickers and I swear I almost cried from the tsunami of emotion that gift made me feel (I still have them).

ripped pants

when spongebob has to sleep over under patricks rock and patrick beats spongebob like 50 times in his sleep

krusty krab pizza song/WE USED TO RIDE THESE BABIES FOR MILES

plankton turns spongebob into a robot and then he rebels

FIRMLY GRASP IT

i’m in the kitchen…at night/nosferatu 

“3 cheers for squidward! hip hip! boo.. hip hip! boo.. hip hip.. BOO YOU STINK”

Krusty Krab training video

The one where Sandy is into extreme sports and spongebob can’t keep up

WHEN THEY THINK THEY KILLED THE HEATH INSPECTOR HOLY SHIT

Sandy hibernates

Spongebob and patrick try to raise a baby clam 

spongebob and patrik paint the invisible boat mobile BLACK

onion breath/i’M UGLY..AND I’M PROUD

when spongebob and patrick pretend to be squiward when he’s trying to sell his house

When spongebob gets sick and patrick tries to cure him

WHAT I LEARNED FROM BOATING SCHOOL IS…..

CHOOOCCOLLATTEEEEE

Spongebob B.C.

When they are afraid to go on land but then they go on land and it turns into live action and spongebob is a kitchen sponge

SEA BEAR/CAMPFIRE SONG SONG

Magic Conch Shell

SOILED IT! SOILED IT! SOILED IT! SOILED IT!

Spongebob tries to get into the Salty Spitoon

FUUUUUTUUREEEE

talent show with squidwards interpretive dance

the dream episode where spongebob is squidwards clarinet andhe goes LAAALAAAALALLALALALA ALAAALAAAAA

Kevin and the queen jellyfish

Fine dining and breathing