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Do you currently have any resources about writing characters with DID? Specifically, antagonists?
Hello!
We don't answer research questions here, especially ones that are very vague like this. Please take a look through our blog, specifically the pinned post at the top which has some links to helpful posts.
Something worth noting is that DID (And other trauma-based dissociative disorders) are already villainized quite often and have plenty of negative and ableist tropes associated with them (The "evil personality" trope, for example). This isn't to say that you can't make a villain/antagonist with DID, but it is something that should be done very carefully.
When responding to a sense of danger, you initially freeze or get taken off guard and immediately forget everything and focus on the situation. Same difference actually.
Making a pattern out of freezing probably leads to a lot of anxiety. Then dissociation? Yes, but not yet.
If you can run away, you will then choose flight. If you have had to run away and hide a lot, you might experience a lot of anxiety and dissociation. But I don't know if we're to dissociation yet so let's keep moving.
If you can't run away but you can defend yourself, then you choose fight. Especially if it works a lot. So you might feel numb to the pain until it reaches its boiling point, but you also are irritable and twitchy about certain things, needing life to just fucking move in the way it needs to. But maybe we're still not to dissociation yet so let's keep moving.
If you can't run nor defend yourself, perhaps you can reason with them instead. Maybe they'll understand. Maybe they didn't mean to hurt you. You did this a lot and grew up to be a bit of a know-it-all, didn't you? I know the feeling, but we still knew some things. But I don't know everything and I'm still figuring dissociation out. So I will deal with repeating myself and move on.
So reasoning didn't work. They didn't get it. Or maybe they did and didn't care. Maybe you actually did do something wrong. Maybe you did something part of you wrong. But you can make it right. And if you always can, or at least mostly can, then you probably fawn a lot. Worry about people but neglect yourself. You take care of yourself enough already, perhaps even too much, right? How much is too much? Are you even taking care of yourself right? Do you even know what right is? Just what exactly are you doing wrong here?
Lol messed it all up
Let's move on to dissociation.
You can't run away from them. You can't defend yourself. You can't reason with them. You can't make them happy and love you.
Why?
Because it doesn't always work.
Because it always hurts so fucking much.
Because you feel like a terrible person for doing it.
Because you should've really known better.
Because you should've kept your mouth shut.
You were only a child. Helpless at times. Still learning the world. Still small and eager and curious. You've had your moments sure, but you've had others too. And maybe you just don't remember them or maybe someone didn't like that or thought it was unreasonable and even silly.
Maybe you were even a very small child. Maybe even a toddler. Or an infant. And you don't know what's going on but there's a lot of chaos around you. A party? A game? A fight? Is everything okay? Are you okay? Is the child okay? They don't know. No one is saying everything's okay. If they are, then maybe they're lying. But what can you do? You're a small child. A toddler. A baby.
You can appease but nothing's working. Reason doesn't help. Nor games. Nor hugs. Heck, they seem mad at you. Why is the good, smart person mad at you?
Because you're a bad child.
Because you didn't know any better.
Grownups are smart lol
Who needs stupid kids lmao i hate everything about my kid self
I can't wait to be a grownup
Because you didn't know any better.
Because you were just a child.
You didn't like that child very much. Sure, they're fine every now and again, but you have work to do. You need to behave like a mature adult, not like a silly little kid. No, not like that. Not like that. No wait. Wait. There we go. Don't move from that spot.
I said don't move from that spot.
Very funny.
I bet you've already forgotten what lesson it was again.
What was it? Uhm...
Uh... H-Hold on. Lemme find it real quick.
Uh. You've always had a valid reason to dissociate. Please treat me better. I love you.
hypersexual littles are real. alters splitting from a hypersexual child are bound to be at least hypersexual. so its not cool to be like, "ew littles should never approach or think about this topic, and if you do try to discuss it, you're a pedophile". Please don't. Hypersexuality, especially in emotionally stuck or stunted parts are bound to feel attached to being treated or "loved" that way. Because that's the only way they know how to cope, even if it's problematic or wrong. It's just a part of some people's realities.
Not all littles are even fucking children. They hold traits and have a connection to childhood memories. Littles refer to the psychological, "inner child". Some system's "inner child", are just more like physical minors, and some are not like physical minors at all.
No one is saying every little ever can consent. Most of us are just referring to the fact that all our alters are capable and deserving of autonomy, not that we want to force or make people have sex. That's fucking crazy. And anyone who does say that can fucking die.
Saying littles can consent is not saying they necessarily need or want to consent, it's saying they have the choice and decision to consent if they so choose. And if you think that people are going to manipulate or coerce our littles into saying yes, you're going to have to get through at least 15 other alters, all armed to the teeth in preparation of a day ever happening like this. If you think we aren't capable of handling it ourselves, you are extremely mistaken.
And have you ever even thought that perhaps enforcing rules or ideas that our alters need to be regulated or controlled, could be reenacting abuse onto us? Have you ever thought that perhaps the hypersexuality is a coping mechanism to try to make the way we have been controlled all throughout our childhood, something desirable or nice? Have you ever thought that maybe the lack of power we had as kids were the reason we were violated, and that this is the only way we can ensure healthy protection?
I'm not saying that you EVER have to make your littles consent, and I'm not saying it's healthy or good for you to do so. I am saying that it is not fair to accuse someone of being predatory just because they say "littles can consent". I am saying it is not right and not your duty to make sure other alters from systems are safe. I am saying that you should treat everyone as if they have the right to consent, because they are a human being that is deserving of human rights.
Everyone deserves autonomy, no matter what, even for people who you think should be controlled or regulated or "protected". But do not, never enforce your ideas or beliefs or "protection" onto someone else without their express permission to do so.
Because this is what it's all about. You do not have permission to tell any of my alters what to do, regardless of their role or status in my system, have I made that clear?
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hey, do you have any recommendations for blogs that are final fusion friendly? ty! 🌷
@reimeichan is someone with DID who very recently achieved final fusion (congrats, again!!) All the conversations I've had with him have been super pleasant and I feel like its blog has been really fusion-friendly and nice to follow.
@hiiragi7 is another fully fused system with DID. I love their content -- it's always interesting to hear their thoughts and perspective on community issues. Their blog isn't afraid to be a bit more discourse-y so do beware if that's a trigger for you!
@system-of-a-feather is someone with DID who floats between final fusion & functional multiplicity! They're always starting wonderful conversations in the community, always bringing a smile to my face! They also love birds and that's a big plus for me (as a fellow bird-lover myself)
I'm not as active as I used to be so I've definitely missed a bunch of people! Please reblog or comment if you're also pursuing final fusion or if your blog is friendly towards those who are. 💚
One thing I don't see mentioned often in DID communities is the frustration of the avoidance. Hell, I can feel the avoidance creeping in now as I type this, what with a headache and just a general desire to not do this.
But the even more frustrating type of avoidance is figuring out who the hell is fronting. Usually that thing lies with the host and in our case, we have a subsystem of hosts that exist in one alter. Alterception. And yet, amnesia still occurs between them in the most confusing way possible. And figuring out who is doing what is so damn irritating cause it's all me but not me at the same time. It's like they're me from a parallel universe. And some of them are so different, it makes me wonder how on earth could they exist within the same subsystem.
But man, when I try and figure who is who, I just. Can't. It gets foggy and headache-y, as if the brain doesn't want to know. And yeah, I know, that's the whole point of the disorder blah blah blah but I just wanna shake it and say "Things are different now! It doesn't have to be this way anymore! You're making it worse!"
I felt like I switched multiple times writing this too and it still all feels like. Not me but not DID either. And when I try to reread the passages, I get brain-fuzzy again and have a hard time reading it, even forgetting what I was trying to do. And retracing my steps leads to more switching.
But man, I just wanna figure out who's doing what so we can organize and coordinate more. It makes it easier to finish art, finish homework, finish stuff in general. I just. Can't.
It's hard figuring out what type of host I am too. Or if I'm even the host subsystem at all. It's even harder writing about DID.
My name is .
Today I feel like an energized acquaintance
greeting in the room.
Sometimes I am a stranger.
Sometimes I am a lover.
But always I am various.
I ask the world, "Do I want to know who I am today?"
And the answer is
an energized acquaintance greeting in the room.
Last night I met a part that I think was about 6 months old judging by development. Someone inside was very upset and it was causing a headache. This time instead of ignoring it I went searching for who it was. A small crowd of child parts (about 3-4) came forward and told me that the baby needed a lullaby. Then I received a memory of child me singing a lullaby to myself to make me feel better. I decided that it might be a better experience for the part to experience someone else singing to them so I found a you tube video of a woman singing childhood songs with cartoon animations. Once this was on the baby took the front for a split second to yawn and I got an image of a baby doing that before they stepped back and were peaceful. My headache was gone.
I wondered how many of my treatment resistant headaches were caused by this part. One of the children said " a lot". I asked if the fact I didn't eat anything until dinner is what upset them and a child said "yes". I suspect baby me was often left hungry from what I know about my environment at that time.
I can't get a conclusive answer but I believe this may be the part that has a fascination with mirrors. Whenever I was near one of my parents I would have trouble not being fascinated by mirrors, almost to the point of being speechless, which would add up for that age. They assumed it was my vanity of course. But I'm certain its a part. Its happened in a few other situations where I was highly stressed as well so I just try to avoid mirrors. This is a really good revelation though. Now that I know for certain I have a part(s) this young I can begin working with them and those that gaurd them
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"unalive" should just mean the opposite of undead. if undead means a dead thing thats alive, unalive shuld mean an alive things thats dead. no i dont have any examples. ☝️yet
When you were younger, your most childish child self, what was the COOLEST thing in the world? Follow up question, within the resources you have right now, whats a cool way you can participate and engage that super cool thing in your present adult life?
Like Dinosaurs? Grab a book, relearn all the names and find someone to dump it on. Find all the documentaries, look into museums and archeological stuff. Space? Museums, literature, microscopes, documentaries, hell star gazing. Racing? Hotwheels? Monster Trucks? Look up the closest nearest event and check it out, maybe learn about cars.
Engage in the fun things your child self would have been amazed and jealous to see you be able to do
Do something your child self would gasp and idolize, even if its stupid. Become the person your child self would have wanted to follow around and talk to constantly, find the stupidest most childish thing to be engaged in and just have fun with it
Feel free to actually reblog and share. I'd love to hear what yall thought were uber cool and any ideas to unapologetically engage and enjoy those uber cool childhood interests.
It's okay to rely on the other alters to take care of things that you can't do. You don't have to do everything by yourself. You're a team, you're a system of people. In fact, you should take advantage of that fact whenever you can. Life as a system is already difficult enough as is, you shouldn't force yourself to make it harder because you believe you have to be able to do it all.
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we don't see many people talking about academic trauma and its effects on systems so here we go!!
for us, a lot of our alters carry extensive academic trauma from our lack of support throughout our education! many alters would split off from the constant overbearing stress of school alone. dissociative amnesia meant we would hardly remember our academics and our own expectations for ourselves partnered with teachers expectations of us due to high grades in the past left us in a cycle of self-beratement and torment.
alters abilities were compared to one another constantly, everyone around us telling us that we could do xyz last week so just do it again. alters fought one another for our academic memories, causing trouble for the hosts to recall things they *needed* to know, because they loved learning but hated the education system!!
academic trauma is just as bad as any other traumas you may have experienced as a system or just as an individual alter. education is hard to maintain for many when the right supports arent put in place for us!!
so heres to systems who had to drop out, or systems who fought and/or still fight to stay in education!! to all the academic helpers and academic traumaholders!! to the systems who love learning but hate school!! to the systems who have extensive academic trauma, and to those still going through it!!
we see you, you arent alone, you're doing wonderfully and we're proud of you!!
Systems about littles: 🥺they are small🥺they snouldn't be allowed to drink, smoke or go to internet🥺they are so weak🥺can't hurt anyone🥺
And real littles that we've seen: persecuters, most powerfull phisical and emotional protectors, angry traumaholders, literally ready to fight God or become him, uncontrollable pieces of shit
Weak small and cute littes exist, but let every system have their own experience
