Regular Sized Rudy

If GOT does not end with Lyanna Mormont on the Iron Throne, I’m burning everything down.

Well that’s commitment.

Confession time; while I may have started making my girlfriend lunches purely because I love her there’s now a little bit of gay spite involved as well. I want the straight girls she works with to see what they’re missing and hold their men to higher standards.

Operation Gay Spite has claimed its first straight relationship! I’m not sure I’ve ever been prouder of anything in my life!

john green was right about cock 

do you ever catch yourself being mean for no reason and youre just like???? go take a nap????

My worst horror house experience was when I couldn’t find the (rather obvious) exit and the guy chasing me with a chainsaw stopped, sighed and pointed me to the exit, saying “please scream as loud as you can when you run out there” and just left. I disappointed the horror house chainsaw dude and I will never get over that

Guy: They are all my friends.. (motioning to hanging corpses; then grabs a noose) Will you be my friend?  Me: Sure totally, you made me a friendship necklace? Oh my god your so sweet?  Guy: … Yes.. Please, let me.. I cant I cant just go (laughing).  – Got to walk a second time through–  Same guy: My friends -wailing-  Me: I came back I just really wanted to be friends so bad Guy: (laughing more) Please, Im not allowed to laugh. 

I went to a haunted corn maze once. Someone ran at me with a chainsaw. I just stared at him. He hung his head and walked away. I left.

The Real Horror Is The People We Dissapointed Along The Way

IM CRYING

One time in a haunted house I shouted “oh my god” and the guy playing the Victorian-esque mad doctor replied “you can just call me doctor” or something like that and a) it was the smoothest fucking thing but b) holy shit I cracked up so hard I wish I could have told him later that that experience will sit with me for life

Dude with a chainsaw chased me while yelling “why don’t you stay for dinner? I’ll hang you with the others” and gestured at the bodies hanging from the ceiling. I was scared but didn’t want to be rude so I screamed back “nO THANK YOU IM NOT HUNGRY I HAD CHICKEN THIRTY MINUTES AGO HAVE A NICE DAY SIR”

I got the Top 4.47% on this English Vocabulary test

Top 6.33% 👍🏻

Top .23% I think it's a random number generator

This is such a hilarious “gotcha” like???? Who gives a shit???

Literally any other colour would’ve been a better choice guys.

I think y’all are missing the point here.

You can theorize to Nebraska and back but that doesn’t change my immediate reaction which is that someone is literally dragging a corpse around

this post is the perfect summation of tumblr’s reading comprehension and critical thought abilities

Nothing like lust color in a children's hospital after dragging a corpse around