shit

3% body

I have a family friend who worked at our local Salvation Army headquarters as a a secretary. This particular office took all the Christmas donations for children in need, put them in a warehouse, and on a designated day the staff and their friends picked through them all, taking whatever they wanted. She saw people hauling away bikes donated for specific families. Some local children had hundreds of dollars of gifts donated in their name, and on Christmas they received three cheap things, items likely not even from the person who sponsored them.

My friend quit, and I’ve not given them a dime of my money since then.

I’m a wildfire and disaster logistics specialist.

I deal with a lot of agencies who provide disaster relief.

I used to say the Salvation Army’s disaster services were the one (literally the ONE) good thing they did.

They would come in, set up a canteen trailer, make and pass out hot coffee and donated food in a disaster, usually being one of the first agencies to get there and the last to leave.

Then I found out.

Every time they did this, regardless of if they were actually invited or deployed by the agency in charge (usually FEMA, sometimes others) they would SELF-DEPLOY. Meanjng they would just show up. Ok. That’s not TOO bad, sometimes agencies have to take initiative and get there before the red tape is sorted out. BUT. They, after they left at the end of the incident, they would send FEMA or the host agency a BILL. They used one or two paid employees (usually the driver of the truck and a supervisor); and many VOLUNTEERS, but they would bill for EVERYONE’s Labor at standard federal rates. They would bill for the food they distributed even though it was all donated by another agency or private parties. They would bill for the coffee they made and the supplies. Except they would use electricity from the shelter location, water from donations or from the shelter, and in many cases, they would get the coffee and industrial filters DONATED, but bill for them at retail prices.

Ben’s cousins are called Gwen and Ken. The only one to ever comment on this is Kevin, son of Devin, father of Devlin, who has no right to make fun of other people’s names.

Other than Ben 10, there’s Gwen 10 and Kevin 11, as well as at least 10 alternate versions of Ben himself, including Ben 23, Bad Ben, Mad Ben, RAT Ben, Nega Ben, two different versions of Ben 10000, and, unfortunately for him, No Watch Ben.

The writers love to play around with time travel, but to avoid paradoxes they have a character called Professor Paradox who just wipes everyone’s memories after every time travel

Ben once gave birth to roughly 10 moths

The entire universe and everything in it was destroyed, except for Ben who had to rebuild it from scratch to the best of his ability. No one remembers this except Ben and it was just a filler episode.

The universe destruction-and-rebuilding basically happened to explain any inconsistencies and design changes in the following seasons

There’s an alien called ‘The Worst’ whose only ability in combat is that he’s indestructible. He still feels all the pain, he just can’t die

When Kevin was 16 he wanted a special motor for his car, but to get it he had to best an alien princess in combat and marry her, so the mad lad just…. did it…. to get a motor…

Kevin, my beautiful, beautiful himbo, can assemble an alien gun in less than 10 seconds, but doesn’t know what TNT is.

There’s an order of medieval knights who captured an alien dragon cartographer and tried for 1000 years to kill him until he finally escaped

The Omnitrix fucked up, so Rath (the tiger alien) is naked for 13 seasons, before they finally fix it

I could honestly write a post like this just about Rath… His species are called Appoplexians (which is supposed to mean ‘overcome with rage’ but happens to also mean ‘internal bleeding’). Instead of shaking hands when they meet, they engage in a wrestling match until one has established dominance. They believe any problem can be solved by hitting it or “hitting it a lot”. They’re beautifully dumb.

There’s a planet called Anur Transyl where vampire, werewolf, ghost, zombie, frankenstein’s monster, and mummy aliens all live together

“The world’s largest rubber-band ball” is actually a prison for electric aliens

One of the recurring villains is a rogue veterinarian who uses his education to create mutant hamsters, frogs, and parakeets.

There are at least three in-universe tv shows about Ben and his aliens

Ben’s grandpa has fucked at least two aliens, one of which is a lizard

X-Men like mutant humans exist. It’s just a thing. One of them is a giant crocodile.

Pluto was destroyed as a throwaway joke in season 5, so it just doesn’t exist in their universe anymore

Ben is addicted to smoothies and he once drank a meat smoothie.

A lot of cryptids and mysteries are real, including Krakken, Mole People, Chupacabra, the Loch Ness Monster, the Jersey Devil, the Bermuda Triangle, and Yeti. Sasquatch also exists, somewhat, but he’s an electric alien. Most of these are never addressed.