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Aries: “I have no idea what I’m doing, but I know I’m doing it really, really well.”

Taurus: “Let me just say, from the bottom of my heart, my bad.”

Gemini: “Oh I’m fine. It’s just that life is pointless and nothing matters and I’m always tired.”

Cancer: “Well first I would be like ..Dad? You’re alive? What the hell?!”

Leo: “Aww, babe…you had a crush on me… that’s embarrassing.”

Virgo: “My only plan today was to buy skittles.”

Libra: “If you rearrange the letters of Peru, you could spell Europe.”

Scorpio: “Don’t worry babe, I’ll protect you. I got stung once, I’m immune. GO AHEAD AND STING ME BEES! IT DOES NOTHING!”

Sagittarius: “Did you know that the food you eat becomes energy? BOOM! That’s spaghetti! Nachos! A cookie!”

Capricorn: “Anything is a toy if you play with it.”

Aquarius: “Gases fill the volume of whatever container they’re in. School.”

“My success is the product of the same system that let off Darren Wilson—guilty We want to dress like, walk like, talk like, dance like, yet we just stand by We take all we want from black culture, but will we show up for black lives?”