We're all penguins here

going to the corner store to get more corners

stop calling it a girl dinner and call it by its formal name: Fend For Yourself dinner in an ingredients household

Bro wants to be a fop but he's barely dapper

Happy Moon Landing Eve! Remember to leave out milk and cookies for Buzz Aldrin and Neil Armstrong, and don’t let Michael Collins convince you to prank NASA!

If Tumblr is still here next July 19th, I fully expect this post to obliterate my activity feed.

when youre aromantic you still get dead wife flashbacks but its just about that really fucking good sandwich you ate last week

if i was a soccer player i'd simply kick that ball in the goal instead of wasting everyone's time

i think it is very depressing that like every aesthetic people try to emulate are of people doing things but they themselves are incapable of being somebody that does things… the mall goth 2005 aesthetic revived in 2022 but nobody goes to the mall to be annoying and weird and nobody lets themselves be cringe… the cottagecore aesthetic but nobody knows how to raise gardens or live self sufficiently … the dark academia aesthetic but nobody actually reads books…. The obsession of looking like you are a type of person who does something without actually doing anything … the Instagram effect

we need to bring back the word Poser

Just saw a high school production of Addams Family and while sure, it was good and all, I’m almost positive the school chose it because they have a 6’9 kid to played Lurch.