don’t want no other shade of blue but you

You were sat in front of your vanity, fixing the last details of your hair and makeup. Tonight was a big night for Shelby Company Ltd. You truly didn’t feel like partying, but you wanted to support your friend, Tommy. So here you were, getting ready to speak to important people about not so important things that didn’t interest you.

You got up from your seat and went to the full length mirror to get a proper look at yourself. The lilac silk dress embraced your curves perfectly and yet, you still felt unsure and uncomfortable in your skin.

You hugged your stomach with shaky hands and sighed.

There was another reason you felt extra self conscious tonight. Tommy was bringing Lizzie as a date and your heart squeezed just thinking about it. Thinking about her with him. It was even worse that Tommy knew how much you disliked her.

It wasn’t a secret you had always been fond of Tommy, even more than he was of you. To him you were just his best childhood friend, and nothing more.

The two of you had stuck together through everything. You had been by his side when he had nothing, you had been there for him when Grace died and now you were there for him when he was going into politics.

And even if your heart broke in million pieces when you saw another woman receiving the love and attention you so desperately craved, you still stayed. He was after all your best friend and a silly crush shouldn’t destroy the special bond you had.

Deep down you always knew it wasn’t just a silly crush but something stronger, something you didn’t even dare think about. Seeing it as a small crush made all of Tommy’s jokingly flirting easier to bare and easier to pass of as joke.

He had a habit of flirting with you as a joke. Teasing you with your affection of him. He would kiss you cheek or wink at you or even let his hands linger on your waist for a moment too long after hugging you. And every time your stomach would fill with butterflies and your heart would drop.

The sound of a car honking shook you out of your thoughts.

You quickly put on your fur coat and grabbed your bag. You took a quick glance at yourself in the hallway mirror before opening the door and walking out, into the freezing autumn air.

Tommy had sent one of the companies Bentleys to pick you up. You couldn’t help but let out a laugh at it. Your Tommy, poor Tommy from Small Heath was sending fucking Bentleys to pick up his friends.

When you arrived at Arrow House it was around eight thirty. Even from outside you could hear the laughing and chattering that was happening inside.

You took a deep breath and painted on the most convincing fake smile you could manage before entering the house. A maid stood ready to take your coat and a waiter offered you a glass of champagne which you gladly took.

You sipped on your drink as you walked into to big room where the event took place. Your eyes immediately found Tommy and… Lizzie, arms linked together. They were talking to what looked like some important people, and Lizzie was laughing at everything Tommy said. He wasn’t even that funny. You sighed with annoyance and went to look for Polly instead. She had always loved you, and had taken you under her wings when you still a little girl.

You found her by the bar, drinking a glass of champagne and observing the crowd. “Y/n” she said with a big smile and opened her arms. You embraced her. The smell of her perfume made you instantly felt safe.

“How are you love?” she asked and pulled from the hug.

“I’m good” You lied and took a big swig from your glass.

She lifted an eyebrow at you and shook her head. “None of that! What’s going on?” she placed her hand on your arm. Polly could tell from a mile away if something was wrong and it was essentially pointless to try and lie to her.

“It’s just Tommy” you shrugged. Polly gave you a sympathetic look and rubbed your arm.

“He’s not worth your troubles dear” She lifted her glass and nodded at you to do the same. You smiled halfhearted at her and drank.

“Oh! Ada is here. I’m just gonna go and say hello” Polly said. She kissed your cheek and left you. Now you were standing by the bar, alone and forcing yourself not look in Tommy’s direction.

You felt so awkward and out of place, and you kept staring at your feet, trying your hardest to avoid conversation.

“Not having fun?” the unfamiliar voice made you look up. A man stood before you.

He was beautiful. A head of blond curls, piercing blue eyes and a moustache. You swallowed and looked around. Was he talking to you?

He lifted an eyebrow at you and smirked when you didn’t respond. You mentally faced palmed yourself for already acting a fool.

“It’s not really my crowd” You finally answered and gave him a shy smile.“Me neither” the man said and took a swig of his whiskey.

“I’m William Ripley” he extended his hand.

“I’m y/n, y/l/n” you placed your hand in his. He lifted your hand to his mouth and placed a kiss on your knuckles. Your face flushed, not used to being flirted with other than Tommy’s teasing. You prayed that William didn’t notice your flustered state.

“Pleasure to meet you Mr. Ripley”.

“Pleasures all mine. And please, call me William” he beamed at you.

You nodded at him, too flustered to say anything, and went to take a sip of champagne, only to find the glass was empty. William noticed too and offered to get you another one.

You couldn’t help but smile like an idiot as he went to get you both a fresh drink. It felt good to finally have a man be interested in you.

“What’s so funny eh?” Tommy’s voice swiftly wiped the smile from your face.

“Nothing” you muttered.

“I haven’t seen you all night” he said.

You rolled your eyes. “Probably cause you’ve been busy showing off your new girlfriend”. Tommy only chuckled at your comment.

“Are you jealous y/n? eh?” he teased. You looked at him and pursed your lips. “No Tom, i am not”.

“Good. Just checking” he winked at you, and like always your inside twisted with butterflies. It made you mad that he had that affect on you.

“I’m gonna leave you to it then” Tommy said. You sighed deeply, but before you could properly start sulking William came back. He gave you one of the two glasses he was holding. You took a big swig of your glass, just wanting to forget your interaction with Tommy.

“You okay?” William laughed and placed a hand on your shoulder. The touch made you skin tingle.

“Yeah, i’m fine” you assured him.

“I’m glad” he said simply and caressed your arm before lightning a cigarette.

As the night went on you kept talking with William. It was easy speaking to him. He was funny, charming and painfully handsome. Still, you couldn’t help but glance in Tommy’s direction every once in a while. He didn’t look at you though. Why would he? He was busy showing Lizzie off and talking business with respected men.

At least that’s what you thought.

In reality Tommy couldn’t stop thinking about you… and that man you were talking to.

He didn’t know why it bothering him so much to see you flirt with someone else. It kept nagging at the back of his head. The sight of you giggling at the man’s jokes made his blood boil and the sight of the stranger stealing small touches made Tommy clench his jaw.

But what really sent him over the edge was seeing you and the man leave the room, to god knows where. Tommy excused himself from the the small circle of people he was talking to and began walking after you and William.

You of course, had no clue that Tommy was following after you. You were on your way out to get some fresh air and a cigarette.

When you stepped out, William pulled out a pack of cigarettes and offered you one. You accepted it and let him light it for you. The cold weather made you shiver.

“Do you want my jacket?” William asked sweetly, already taking it off before you could even answer.

“She’s fine”.

Tommy’s stern tone made both William and you turn your head towards the door. William furrowed his brows and gave you a confused side glance. You smiled apologetic at him before looking back at Tommy.

“Tommy leave it” you hissed. He ignored you and firmly took ahold of your wrist, dragging you with him back to the house.

“Tommy stop it! what are you doing?” you shouted and burrowed your heel into the ground to stop him from dragging you further. Unfortunately Tommy was much stronger than you.

“Leave her alone” William protested and ran to you. He must not have known who Tommy was because he began pushing him. Your stomach dropped as Tommy let go of your wrist and took ahold of Williams collar.

“Stop it Tom!” you whined.

You had never seen him look so angry, his face turned crimson and veins popped out from his neck. It was terrifying.

“You leave her alone you hear me?” Tommy shouted in Williams face. Poor William looked absolutely petrified, and your eyes welled up with tears.

“Tommy for god’s sake stop it”. Your screaming made Tommy drop William from his grip, who quickly ran back back into the house.

You shook your head at Tommy and began walking to the door, too angry to be in the presence of him.

“Y/n, wait” Tommy yelled after you.

“Leave me alone” you said harshly.

“No! let me explain” he pleaded.

You were shaking with anger. Finally you had found someone who was actually interested in you and of course Tommy had to fuck it up. You spun around to face Tommy and clenched your fists.

“Explain what? that you’re fucking psycho? huh? He was being nice to me and i actually really like him” you spat.

“Y/n please don’t say that” his voice broke at the end and a pang of guilt went through you.

“No just.. y/n for fuck’s sake” he stammered. “Just drop it Tom” you turned around again and opened the door.

“Y/n for fuck’s i love you!” Tommy yelled. You froze and felt your heart skip a beat. Your hand left the doorknob and you turned to face him.

“What? what did you say?” you asked, suddenly feeling dizzy.

“I fucking love you”. His eyes locked with yours and his face softened. You couldn’t believe the words coming out of his mouth.

“Why didn’t you say? you knew how i felt about you. Why didn’t you tell me Tom?” you whispered and bit your lip, trying your best to hold your tears back.

“Because i didn’t know…” He dropped his head and took a shaky breath.

“I didn’t realise until i saw you with him” he confessed. You couldn’t hold your tears in anymore. Warm drops rolled down your cheeks. Tommy walked to you, he cupped your face and wiped your tears with the pads of him thumbs.

“I’m sorry y/n”.

“Please say something” his voice was filled with desperation.

“I don’t know what to say Tom”. You felt so overwhelmed. He was still cupping your face and tracing gentle circles on your cheeks.

“Can i kiss you?”

You knew it was probably a bad idea but you couldn’t help but nod. Softly Tommy pressed his lips to yours and time stood still for a moment.

You had long forgotten about the cold and William. All you could think about was Tommy and the taste of smoke and whiskey on his tongue.

He broke the kiss. “I really fucking love you y/n and i’m really fucking sorry for everything” he murmured against your lips.