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Who got you in the nose?

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raskattack

more proof the 2011 bruins were the best: alex burrows tried to eat bergys hand and so naturally for the rest of the series the bruins kept shoving their fingers in the canucks mouths until claude julien literally had to tell them to stop shoving their fingers in the opponents mouth

tboobs-deactivated20220315

[x]

thiccsidney

dustinbrowns

reblog this and tag Your hockey player. you know. the one that when you look at them you think ‘i will never love another hockey player/man/woman/human like i love you’. the one that not necessarily was your first favorite but the One that makes you think ‘i never truly knew a favorite player until you’. the One. we all have one. who is yours

#andrew shaw

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nealersegs918

Making a Preds playlist. This is what I got so far…any suggestions?

paulestrapide

loser by Beck

screamingarrows-archive-deactiv

currently this is my hockey-tonight mood

alexandretexiers

Gally did an Insta live and Nate decided to spam it like the good friend he is lmao

ogbrobeans

Blessing your feed. WSHv.DET 2/9/17

puckducky

SAME

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pattykane

So clearly all you people who think that Patrick Kane is a horrible person who is heartless are wrong because he’s actually a nice guy. I’ve met him, and I know from when I met him he’s a nice guy. Then this week he’s invited a fan who is very ill to a game to be his special guest, then this story of him giving up his first class seat. Now all you haters are going to say the game one is him getting paid, it’s really not. Kane actually does go out of his way to do things for fans, that is not required of him to. One time he waited with a girl, who was waiting for her teammates to show up to the hospital. Then he was at a children’s hospital with his management, because they are the ones to set it up, and when his manager said it was time to go, Pat told them that he was going to stay, and get a cab later because he wanted to spend more time with the fans. At the convention he’ll jump off stage after panels, and sign stuff. Or after his group signings he’ll by the table where fans, who didn’t win that signing, are just waiting, and sign some of those fans things. He’s not actually that bad of a person. Yeah, he has made some mistakes, but he’s learned from those things, and he’s publicly said that he has. He’s apologized. You guys should really learn who he really is before hating on him. Pat’s not some big shot hockey player; who doesn’t care about people because he does. He’s a classy guy, who has made a few mistake. Everyone you know, even yourself, have made mistakes. Maybe they aren’t the same mistakes, but they are still mistakes you wish you didn’t make, but you didn’t anyway. Because of that girl his life is forever messed up. One day he will have to explain to his kids/grandkids why he wasn’t in the “Hat Trick” movie. That’s going to be hard enough on him. So cut him some slack. I don’t think you would want someone to poking at mistakes you have made everyday online because I’ve had that done to me before, and it fucking sucks. I’m proud to have Patrick on my team, and I’m going to tell my kids about how proud I was to have him on this team. I’m going to tell them about what happened, and how those things just proved Chicago has the best fans base in hockey because we didn’t just dump him. We allowed him to show us he didn’t rape that girl, and that he was sorry. For that we stood with him, and watch him become MVP. We watched him make a new American/Blackhawks record. You don’t have to talk to your kids about him… You don’t have to talk about him period. Understand that he’s a reason for some people still being here because I know for a fact that he’s a reason for one person. But understand that he will forever have to live with his past, and what that girl had done to his life. I hope you can maybe see that he’s not that bad of a person after all. That he does care about people.

ferduh

you’re leaving out some of patty’s best moments 😳🙈 like how he wore blackface 😍🙌🏼 and how he got arrested for physically assaulting a cab driver 😌🤗 and how he has only two sexual assault accusations under his belt 😜🤤 how could this post be complete without ALL of pattycake’s achievements ?? 😇🙀

brendan-ga11agher-deactivated20

Aww poor Patty, who will sit with tears in his eyes and recount to his grandchildren how he was soooo unfairly left out of a video because he was being investigated for sexual assault 😭😥you’re right; we should cut him some slack. After all, doing something generous apparently erases years of terrible behaviour that included multiple assaults and racist/homophobic comments and actions! Gotta sympathize with him, because I guess he’s the real victim here!!!

andrebearakovsky

The Caps Lost and You Want to Cry Remedy Masterpost

So the Caps just lost and you feel ready to cry. What can you do to help remedy that feeling of despair? I present to you my magnum opus, a masterpost of happy and funny Caps videos and posts to make you feel better and forget about any bad hockey you just watched. In this post is everything you could ever want to watch related to the Caps. Of course, I don’t have everything, I’m not nearly as extensive as RMNB, and there’s a lack of actual hockey highlights (as the point of this post is to highlight off-ice hilarity). So sit back, pick what you want to watch, and enjoy.

Official Team Events

Segway Tour 2017

Segway Tour 2015

Segway Tour 2007

Family Skate 2016

Caps visit MedStar Georgetown University Hospital 2016

Emoji Sentences (be sure to watch the one in the comments too)

Emoji Impressions

Casino Night 2016

Casino Night 2015

Capitals Bobblehead Election

Justin Williams Bobblehead Concession Speech

Burky/Willy and Schmidty/Chorns play videogames

Ovi and Kuzy talk about their hair

2017 Canine Calendar Shoot - pics plus a video of Kuzy giggling, a feature on Taylor Winnik, Ovi’s dog maintenance

2016 Canine Calendar Shoot

Willy, Latts, Beags, and Schmidty go golfing

Swedish Food Tasting

Dads Trip 2016

History of Caps Mentors’ Trips

Caps visit Joint Base Andrews

Jay Beagle skates with his son

Caps at Six Flags 2015

Caps at Six Flags 2011

Rowing on the Potomac

Crab Cake Cooking Competition

Team Silliness

The Russian Bros have fun in front of a giant Ovi ad

Team bonding dart competition - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7

Halloween Karaoke - Zach Sanford, Alex Ovechkin, Andre Burakovsky

Nicky pranks Mojo and Burky

The late-night fire alarm incident

Shenanigans on a plane feat. Green & Brouwer

More Silliness

Why did they give Locker a t-shirt gun

Ovi, Kuzy, and Geno dress as Russian mascots

Ovi and Carly discuss their pregame routine

“Hockey at its best”

Andre Burakovsky, Tom Wilson, Michael Latta

Burky explains the Uber incident

Burky is the MPP of the Caps

5 seconds of Burky looking cute

Cruisin with Willy and Burky on the way to Casino Night

Burky shames the cameraman for being a Penguins fan - the whole interview is good but this happens 15 minutes in

Interview with Latts - dolphins and Valentine’s Day

Cruisin with Willy and Latts on the way to Casino Night

Willy and Latts feature for Washington Life Magazine

Willy and Latts voted best bromance

Burky spooks Latts

Interview with Latts - nicknames, playoff beards, and Caps Roomies

Burky and Willy sing dubsmash together

Willy and Latts fill out their 2015 March Madness bracket

A good brobeans post

I meant to include the video of Tom and Latts’s apartment from the Road to the Winter Classic episodes but I cannot for the life of me find it, so as consolation I’m going to include a link to the Road to the Winter Classic episodes which you can watch if you have Amazon Prime here

Alex Ovechkin

Ovi delivers pizza

The Alex Ovechkin song

Behind the scenes with Ovi at the 2017 All Star Game

Ovi escapes his own home

Ovi makes a noise

Ovi DJs

Steve Dangle talks about Ovi’s 500th goal

Ovi swings away in 2015 Breakaway Challenge

Ovi dons a cowboy hat in classic 2009 Breakaway Challenge

Alex Ovechkin Funny Moments

Top 10 Ovi Off Ice Moments

Post with links to many Ovi quotes and videos

Nicklas Backstrom

Nicky hat trick quote

Nicky singing (there’s also some behind the scenes but the singing is the important part)

Cruisin with Nicky

Ovi & Nicky

All Star Nicklas Backstrom

Ovi and Nicky complete each other

Braden Holtby

Holts wants to bring the Cup back to his hometown

Holts has strong opinions on socks

Fetus Holtby video

Karl Alzner, John Carlson

Alzner does “Canadian or Nah” and makes a loon call

Carlzner test drive - Part 1, Part 2

Carlzner roomies - Part 1, Part 2

Carlzner Q&A at Caps Con Kid Press Conference 2011 - Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Carlson at 2011 Winter Classic (segment from 10:50-15:47)

Evgeny Kuznetsov

Kuzy’s daughter drives the car

“It’s rivalry night”

Kuzy tells the story about meeting Brad Pitt and Orly getting cut out of the photos

Kuzy trolls the refs (mushrooms, baked potatoes, and medium rare steak)

Kuzy at the All Star Game

Kuzy’s most Extra celly possibly ever (with links to more cellys in the article)

Nate Schmidt

Schmidty sings Taylor Swift

Schmidty’s Chewbacca impression

Barry Trotz Mishaps

Oshie bulldozes Trotz

Trotz gets hit in the head with a puck

Dancing

Mojo busting moves (feat. Taylor Winnik)

Lars Johansson victory dances - dance 1, dance 2

Shaving Cream

Vrana 1st NHL goal

Kuzy hat trick

Willy 1st NHL goal

Nicky pranks Ovi

Mustaches

Movember trophy ceremony 2015

Top 5 Caps mustaches

Who has the best mustache?

Christmas

Christmas elf dancing

2015 holiday card

2014 holiday card w/ Wizards

2013 holiday card

Commercials

2017 All Star Game Audition Commercial

Paisano’s Commercial

Paisano’s Commercial Bloopers

Ovi as Caps Interviewer (feat. Nicky, Greener, and Brooks Laich)

Ovi Eastern Motors Commercial

2007 All Star Game Road Trip Commercial

Global Heritage Series

Nicklas Backstrom - Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Evgeny Kuznetsov - Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Tributes

John Carlson 500 Games Played Tribute

Karl Alzner 500 Consecutive Games Played Tribute

Alex Ovechkin 1000 Points Ceremony

Alex Ovechkin 1000 Points Tribute

Nicklas Backstrom 500 Assists Tribute

Nicklas Backstrom 500 Assists Ceremony

Braden Holtby Vezina Ceremony

Alex Ovechkin 500 Goals Ceremony

Alex Ovechkin 500 Goals Tribute

Karl Alzner breaks Caps record for consecutive games played tribute

Drafts

Jakub Vrana (phone call with Ovi)

Zach Sanford (interview)

Andre Burakovsky

Tom Wilson

Evgeny Kuznetsov

Marcus Johansson

Alex Ovechkin

Reference

Every butt slash article RMNB has ever written

Player reaction gifs

On-Ice Moments

Oshie’s shootout goal that wasn’t actually in the shootout

Ovi’s 1000th point (John Walton call)

Nicky’s 500th assist

The epic Orlov hit on Duchene

Edits to Orlov’s hit

Ovi’s 500th career goal (all calls)

Huge save leads to Ovi’s OT gamewinner

TJ Oshie Olympic Shootout

Oshie shootout compilation

John Carlson scores OT winner in 2010 World Juniors

Empty Net Fails

Best 1 on 1 Embarrassing Moments - Part 1, Part 2

10 Minutes of Bad Goals

5 Minutes of Happy Goalies

Hat Tricks

Oshie 04/28/2016 vs PIT in the playoffs

Williams 01/17/2016 vs NYR (I can’t find his hat trick from ‘06 so this’ll have to do)

Kuznetsov 10/23/2015 @ EDM

Oshie 01/03/2015 @ SJS

Backstrom 12/13/2014 vs TBL

Oshie 03/27/2014 vs MIN (hats)

Ovechkin 12/10/2013 vs TBL

Eller 01/04/2012 vs WPG

Backstrom 4/17/2010 vs MTL in the playoffs

Ovechkin 05/04/2009 vs PIT in the playoffs

Ovechkin 12/15/2006 @ ATL (I’m only including 3/17 Ovi hat tricks else we’ll be here all day)

Non-Caps

Goal Horns

Auston Matthews Rap

All Star DJ Snoop

Baby Leafs in Road to the Winter Classic

Get Vladi some snow

Jamie Benn and Tyler Segin Head to Head

PK Subban wins breakaway challenge

“Fruit Salad” by Dylan Strome feat. Mitch Marner

Crosby and MacKinnon work at Tim Horton’s

Full Games/Events

2017 All Star Game

2017 All Star Game Skills Competition - Part 1, Part 2

2016 Heritage Classic EDM vs WPG

2016 All Star Game - Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

2016 All Star Game Skills Competition (playlist)

2015 All Star Fantasy Draft

2015 Caps Winter Classic

Still not satisfied? Go check out some of my posts! They’re funny I promise. Karlsson/Carlson flowchart, Caps Drinking Game, Why Carlson or Alzner Should Have the A, Caps True Nicknames, Top Golf RMNB Insta Photos, New Caps Lineup, Caps Top 10 (Part 1, Part 2)

official-nhl

Gardiner realizes he has a hole in his stick tape.

paleozoics

MY FRIEND SENT ME THIS FROM THE BC-BU GAME OMFG

tumblingmuffin

*refers to one player by their first name, another by their last name, and another by their nickname all in the same sentence*

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Watch Anya Live on Cam

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.

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Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming

brandoncarlo

So someone made this gif but cropped out Matt so

mavrikbourques22

tell me which hockey player you ship me with

bonus if you say why

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