nolpat fan 42

hi! OKAY, I did have a theory. which was that he like, hit some girl up, struck out, sent some embarrassing message that stayed on delivered for too long, and so he just had to delete the whole thing to try and like, get out of her inbox. just like, fuck. we gotta go bald.

and then my other theory is that the exact opposite of that happened. like, he deleted it for an unknown reason (probably hoping to like, be more offline and present in his real life. and to turn over a new leaf and leave social media behind) but then he wanted to dm or follow or just stalk some hot girl, so then he had to reactivate so that he can look at her. or so that she'll reply because of his blue tick and photos of him playing professional hockey

which, like. that has to be the reason he leaves up that photo of him playing in the flyers penguins game, right? and the one with Gritty? to get girls? because we know that he thinks that philly's a shit hole with blue collar wagon fans who smell like cat piss. famously, he does think that. so. I guess he just gets more pussy when he's a hockey player on instagram

DRINKS ON ME!!!! LET'S CELEBRATE THIS DAY!

you're an interesting little chicky, anon. I like you