lord sparr stan

“animorphs kids” this, “harry potter kids” that. will ANYONE, and i mean ANYONE, spare a thought for the secrets of droon kids in this trying time

imagine a magical elf in a tower… my friend you are imagining the genre known as fantasy

What do you mean all my problems can't be solved by cleaving things in twain with an ancient mighty blade. You're sounding awful cleavable right now.

I wish wizards were real so bad imagine coming out of a wal mart and seeing some guy with long robes and a big hat in the parking lot surrounded by wacky particle effects screaming some shit like "By the moon and the starlight, by the shield and the sword, I summon to me, my Honda Accord!" And then just getting into his car and driving off

there's also the idea that he drove to walmart in his honda accord, and then when he got out he either forgot where he parked or wanted to skip like 20 seconds of walking so he just summons it right in front of the door

To not have to find a parking space, most wizards keep their Honda Accords in a extradimensional oubliette when not driving. This also saves on garage space.

Clearly the wizard had to summon his Honda Accord because someone stole it while he was shopping. The carjacker is now tumbling violently down the freeway like a source engine ragdoll

do you think. urik and leonardo da vinci.

*flight intercom* this is your captain speakinf. googoo gaga babay bububugbggh huegy oo gaga googy bboobobobaba *plane rapidly descending*

*wizard intercom* hello passengers—it’s the wizard again. guess who i just de-aged 36 and a half years