a (french) (lesbian) mess

“mold is gross!!” “mold gets people sick!!” maybe for you. my mold loves me. we share germs & we arw in love ❤️ he livws on my water bottle and i take him everywhere with me. i am dyinf. for unrelated reasons

25-35 is such a weird fucking age because you’re 100% a bread-and-butter Standard Edition Millennial but the cool teens are like “ok boomer” because you have a Real Job but the actual Boomers at your job are like “I’m not going to listen to a literal fucking child” as they download 16 self-replicating viruses and meanwhile the Gen Xers are telling you to refinance a mortgage for a house you don’t have and you’re sitting there at the Adults Table with the pretty tasty casserole you cooked because you’ve finally figured out how to do that now but everyone is eating the Boomer’s store-bought macaroni instead and admittedly they do sort of taste similar so it probably wasn’t worth all the trouble of cooking from scratch and you’re trying to comfort the freshly-graduated sobbing 22-year-old next to you because she just woke up here and doesn’t know where she is but you have like maybe 5k dollars in a savings account labelled RETIREMENT that grows approx. twelve cents a year and you keep eating dry macaroni while smiling incomprehensibly and periodically blacking out like ??????????

Omg someone FINALLY put it into WORDS

The Ace Attorney translation is so funny because if it were translated today it would probably just be normal but since it was the 2000s and American brains couldn't comprehend Japan there's randomly an insular village that strictly practices Shinto divination in Southern California

being a fucking casual is a skill that takes years of honing

you need to have the kind of soul usually reserved for monks to be able to hop on a game you have hundreds of hours on that you've been playing for years, suck ass at it, and not want to jump into the sun or get mad in chat at some 13 year old who downloaded the game last night and is already better than you . there are many others who live like me. join us

i’m obsessed with the mum from ponyo. driving single lane on a cliff edge? drift those turns in your nissan cube. husband has to work an extra shift? tell him to fuck off in morse code. pet fish turned into a child on your driveway? adopt her. town drowned in a tsunami? leave your 5 year old in charge, he’s the man of the house now

well my goal for 2024 is just to have a good day 👍