Papa’s Palace

It would be a shame if the protesters noted that plainclothes cops can be identified a number of ways, such as wearing steel-toed boots; an armband or wristband of a particular color; driving white, black, or dark blue cars with concealed lights; or having the outline of cuffs visible in the back pocket or the bumps of an armor vest’s shoulder straps under their shirt.

It would be a shame if the protesters began making their signs out of inch-thick plywood to stop rubber bullets, forming a tight shield wall to prevent police from singling out and mobbing individual protesters. It would be a shame if the people behind the shield wall held up umbrellas so that tear gas canisters fired over the heads of the front line will be bounced away. It would be a shame if protesters began constructing improvised armor vests out of duct tape, hardback books, and ceramic tiles.

It would be a shame if protesters started wearing safety glasses, hard hats, respirators, and gardening gloves, all of which can be found at the same hardware stores as the plywood. It would be a shame if they started using traffic cones (the kind without the hole in the top) upside-down buckets, or other improvised lids to contain tear gas by placing them over the canisters.

It would be a shame if protesters learned that police scanners are legal to own in the US, allowing them to learn where police are moving and what routes they intend to take. It would be a shame if they discovered that these scanners can be used to send as well as receive, allowing them to flood the scanner frequencies with noise.

Face to face with a 90 year old turtle

WHY EATING SEASONALLY IS IMPORTANT

•save money - food is at it’s highest supply

•food is better - it is grown closer to home so less likely to rot

•support local, sustainable farmers

Wizard magic: Long staffs and capes. Magestic, poised, but immensely powerful. Has to memorize intricate jestures and words, lest the spell backfire.

~ Tall, hulking shapes loom in your peripheral vision. Normally, they disappear when you look at them, but you could’ve sworn that last one seemed to run off into the underbrush.

~ You’ve been following a trail of deer prints for about 10 minutes now. You reach the middle of a clearing and they abruptly stop.

~ There should always be some form of ambient background noise - birdsong, the droning of insects, leaves blowing in the wind. If it ever stops, leave the area immediately.

~ You knew you were heading in the direction of the highway; the noise had been getting louder. Now it’s coming from behind you. And it’s receding.

~ If you get lost, don’t bother climbing a tree to survey your surroundings. You’ll won’t like what you see.

Itty bitty boys

Mississippi boys

Inner city boys

I like the pretty boys, with the bow tie

Get your nails did, let it blow dry

I like a big beard

I like a clean face

I don't discriminate, come and get a taste

He finds his way to a barstool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, “Hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?”

The bar immediately falls absolutely quiet. In a very deep, husky voice, the woman next to him says, “Before you tell that joke, sir, you should know five things….

1 - The bartender is a blonde girl. 2 - The bouncer is a blonde girl. 3 - I’m a 6 feet tall, 200-pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate. 4 - The woman sitting next to me is blonde and is a professional weightlifter. 5 - The lady to your right is a blonde and is a professional wrestler.

Now think about it seriously Mister, do you still wanna tell that joke?”

Wearing oversized trenchcoats and keeping stones, shinies, leafs, and bottle caps in the large pockets

Reading about fungi while sitting on a log

Running through the forest with your friends in bare feet, stopping by a creek to recite poetry and eat honeysuckles

Using interesting rocks you've found as paperweights

"You know, I'm not sure if that's a stain from dirt or my sepia ink."

Letting a snail crawl across your hand as you read in your backyard. You name it something pretentious, or after a dead poet

Documenting in a field journal the progress of a decomposing tree or animal with illustrations and small notes about larvae or bark coloration.

Creating your own Dead Poets Society, decorating the hideout with strange trinkets you found in the woods or at Goodwill on half price day.

Putting some sort of mud or onion grass in whiskey, daring your friend to drink it after declaring it a "potion."

Shouting your favorite memorized poem from the top of a tree or waterfall (Sounding your barbaric YAWP...literally).

Listening to Hozier in a bog at night.

Coming into class with small twigs still in your hair from the evening before.

"Is this mushroom poisonous?"

"I mean you might swell up or vomit or something."

"... probably tastes good though."