had to have a routine exam last week that's required before my surgery and was in so much pain afterwards and so stressed about the results all week only to receive info this morning that the sample they took was insufficient. the sample being compromised was also definitely my fault because the doctor had a hard time collecting it since I was in so much pain, even after using the strong pain medication they recommended beforehand (WHICH DIDNT EVEN HELP THAT MUCH!?). Procedure caused a pretty severe flare and was in pain for days afterwards.

Also a week before this my nana called to tell me that my mother (who I'm no contact with) was diagnosed with a hereditary connective tissue disorder which could have some really serious implications related to my current issues. I know that my mom was in the room with her during that conversation and tried to ask my nana if she knew the name but she acted like she didn't know it and said I needed to talk to my mother to find out what it was.

My mom had also texted me a few days before that she had some health things but said I needed to call her to find out. So now both my nana and mom are keeping this crucial health info unless I fucking call my mom and talk to her.

I asked my brother if he could check on my mom soon because he's still on good terms with her and even though we're not talking I don't necessarily want her to suffer. He said he would do it soon bc the timing with my health stuff is pretty urgent but it's been like a week and a half. I reminded him a couple days ago and he promised again that he would do it but there is still no new info. I don't necessarily blame him bc I know it probably feels like he is in the middle of this.

So no fucking answers for that exam that sent me into a multi-day flare AND my mother (who I am specifically not speaking to) is withholding crucial medical information from me unless i reach out to her. And then I cried about all of this and burst a shit ton of the blood vessels in my face so now it looks bruised. Even less answers than before and 10 times the stress.