pshunnim

The bell above your restaurant door rang at exactly 1:35 AM. You didn't have to look up from the register to know who it was. You turn to the stove behind you, ready to reheat the meal you prepared for your regular.

“You're late tonight.”

“Sorry.”

The familiar laugh behind you reached your ears quickly as Kamden slid into his usual seat near the window, dropping his backpack onto the seat beside him. His hair was mussed beneath a black cap, his eye bags more noticeable than last Friday. From the looks of it, he'd just finished dance practice.

“But I’m still here, aren't I?”

You rolled your eyes, though the smile tugging at your lips ruined any attempt at annoyance.

"Wow. Such dedication."

"Thank you."

"That wasn't a compliment, Kammy."

"It sounded like one."

You shook your head and disappeared into the back kitchen to get a drink for him. You could hear Kamden humming as you walked away, presumably one of their comeback songs he'd been telling you about recently. After a couple of months, he somehow became a part of the restaurant's nightly soundtrack. The soft humming of the refrigerator at the back, the sound of the traffic outside, the occasional rain pattering onto the windows. And Kamden. Always Kamden, every Friday. Always at the exact same time.

He'd started out as a normal customer, someone who’d been looking for a place to eat during late hours of the night. A time when barely any restaurants were open. A handsome customer, admittedly, but still just a customer. After a couple of weeks, he'd turned into a regular who'd always order what was easiest to make. He'd always stay for an hour or two then leave. But over time, things changed. Now he didn't even need to order anymore.

By the time you returned from the kitchen, a plate of kimchi fried rice was already in your hands. His favorite. Kamden's eyes immediately lit up.

"You love me."

"You wish I did."

You set the plate down as a soft chuckle escapes his lips, a quiet "I do” barely audible. You catch it anyway and turn to get him a drink from the fridge, ignoring how your chest suddenly feels warm. The booth creaks as you slip into the seat across him, setting down the can of soda in front of him. The restaurant was empty, as usual. At this hour, it always was. Most people had gone home from work hours ago. 

Months ago, you would’ve been more worried about a decrease in profit because of the hours your restaurant would be open. But not anymore, you never worried when Kamden was there. Not when he sat across from you and talked about his day between bites, and when he told stories about his members he loved so dearly. Not when he laughed so hard his eyes disappeared, and definitely not when he looked at you like you were the only person in the room. Well, technically, you always were. But the realization that you felt more for him was terrifying.

It was easy when he was just a customer. Easy when he was only another face passing through. But now?

Now you knew exactly how he liked his coffee. You knew he always stole extra napkins. You knew he drummed his fingers when he was nervous. You knew he called his mother after difficult days. You knew the shape of his smile and the sound of his voice at two in the morning. And knowing all those things made wanting him feel dangerous. Because people left. People moved on. Especially people like Kamden. His life was moving forward at a hundred miles an hour. Tours, schedules, flights. Big dreams. And you were just-

"Hey."

His voice interrupted your thoughts. You blinked and cleared your throat awkwardly.

"Hm?"

Kamden was watching you thoughtfully.

“You were gone for a sec.”

"No, I'm literally sitting right here."

"You know what I mean."

Unfortunately, you did. You looked away first, staring at the window to pretend to check the weather. Outside, the usual neon signs from bars across the street reflected against the rain-slick concrete.

Kamden rested his chin on his palm.

"Something bothering you?"

The honest answer sat painfully in your chest as you shook your head.

You. You are. You have been for weeks.

Not because he'd done anything wrong, quite the opposite. Because every night made it harder. Every conversation, every laugh, every moment that felt questionably like more, more than how you knew you interacted with other customers. But neither of you ever crossed that line. Maybe because you were scared. Maybe because he was. Or maybe because both of you were waiting for the other person to move first.

His voice softened. "You don't have to tell me."

The restaurant lights cast warm light across his features. For a second, he looked less like the polished idol you’ve seen on the small TV in the corner of the restaurant. Less like someone untouchable. Just Na Kamden. The guy who came here when he couldn't sleep. The guy who always stayed until closing. The guy you knew missed his twin brother thousands of miles away whenever he looked in the mirror. The guy who somehow made this place feel like home.

“Do you ever think about disappearing?”

The question escaped before you could stop it. Kamden smiled awkwardly.

"I...What?"

"Not forever."

You fiddled with a sugar packet.

"Just... leaving everything behind for a little while. Like a hiatus, maybe."

Silence settled between you. Outside, rain continued falling. Then Kamden nodded.

"A lot."

Your eyes lifted.

"Really?"

"Yeah."

He leaned back, his gaze drifting towards the droplets of rain gathering on the glass of the window.

"Everyone wants something. Everyone's watching. Everyone has expectations of me. Especially as the leader. After taking over for Jiho, I just…I'm always scared."

You listened quietly.

"I love what I do. And I'm glad I chose this path. But sometimes I wonder what it'd be like if nobody knew who I was. If I could just enjoy my life without walking on eggshells."

Kamden laughed softly.

"Sounds dramatic when I say it out loud."

"No."

You shook your head.

"It doesn't."

His eyes met yours. For a moment, neither of you spoke. The rain outside grew stronger, but the restaurant felt warmer. Safer. And suddenly, terrifyingly, you wanted to reach across the table and take his hand. You didn't. But somehow Kamden noticed anyway. His gaze flickered downward to your hand, then back up again.

"Can I tell you something?"

Your pulse jumped.

"Sure."

He smiled nervously. You couldn't remember ever seeing him nervous before.

"I come here even when I'm not hungry. And I know there are restaurants closer to my apartment."

His voice became quieter.

"I know I could order delivery instead of walking here at 1 in the morning. But this place feels different."

The room suddenly felt too small for both of you.

Kamden swallowed.

"Because you're here."

For one second, the entire world disappeared. The rain. The restaurant. The city. Everything. Only him remained. 

"Kamden..."

His smile faltered. He'd probably spent weeks gathering the courage to say that. He looked disappointed, ready for rejection. The realization hit you. Kamden thought you didn't feel the same. 

You stood abruptly. His expression immediately became confused. Then you walked around the table. His eyes widened.

"Uh-"

"Move over."

"What?"

"Move, Kammy."

Laughing nervously, he slid across the booth. You sat beside him. Close enough that your shoulders touched. Close enough to hear his breath catch the moment your hand intertwined with his own. His grin appeared slowly. Brightly. Like the warm sunrise you always saw before closing up the restaurant.

"Oh. So you do like me."

You groaned.

"Don't make that face."

"What face?"

"That face."

"I'm happy!"

"You look ridiculous."

"I look like this because you've basically admitted that you're in love with me."

You shoved his shoulder, a grin creeping up on your lips as he laughed hard. The sound filled the restaurant. Filled every empty corner. And for the first time in weeks, the fear inside your chest quieted. Because maybe the future was uncertain. Maybe his schedule would get busy. Maybe you wouldn't see him for a while.

But right now? Kamden was here. Beside you. And for now, you could guarantee that he would be there for you, every Friday.

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