goblin pile

I'm imagining a world where RPGMaker somehow made it as the de facto codebase for software and you have to navigate your banking app by walking around in a huge room full of NPCs named "make deposit" and "make withdrawal" etc and there's loud as fuck stock music playing

wait i just found out you can be nice to people and be their friend i thought we had to kill them all cause i was raised in a lab to be a living weapon

all guys have a shirt which is their best shirt. that's just guys for ya...

(muttering to myself as i put on an outfit which is my best shirt with my best pants) i didn't need to go this hard...

do not start gambling. go outside and locate a bug. now post it on inaturalist. bam. nature's gacha game

Lets face the music we all want to get raw hawged by the pit boys so lets not play no more and learn how to be real in our lives for the first fuckjng time

nevermind post cancelled he's dead again

wow this pizza is great it's so good it's unreal *remembers the unreal engine is dogshit* I mean uh it's Source how good this pizza is

(nods sagely) (nods basily) (nods rosemarily) (nods saltly) (nods star anisely)

it’s not rpf it’s speculative history