Osey TorVan

I'm not talking about self-image or even like attachment styles, although peer emotional abuse affects that too. I'm talking about how it legitimately stunts your understanding of how positive platonic relationships even work.

Like, a few years back (pre pandemic) a classmate point-blank told me, "hey, you're pretty cool, do you wanna come out for drinks and trivia with us Thursday night?" and my first internal reaction wasn't "oh cool, a friend!" or even "I'm not really interested" but: "where is the trap?" My kneejerk response to an earnest overture of friendship from this guy was trying to figure out how he was trying to back me into a corner, trick me into something, or make fun of me. We were in goddamm GRADUATE SCHOOL.

Of course I did end up going to drinks and it was a lovely time, but sometimes I think about the sheer number of potential friendships I've missed out on because I read their intentions as potentially hostile, *even when their intent is clearly not hostile*. Getting asked out for drinks is SUPER NORMAL. Being invited to parties is normal. Meeting for coffee is normal. in fact it's a primary way of forging adult friendships. But i am immediately wary of it, because the years in which I was developing most of my crucial social skills were spent dodging cruel pranks, getting invited to fake parties or uninvited from real ones, getting asked out "as a joke", being given compliments that were actually somehow insults, and so forth.

it’s a difficult thing to come to terms with your sexuality, especially if you’re aspec.

it doesn’t make you any less aromantic if you are still trying to accept it, or if you feel disappointed because you are.

it has taken me a long time to accept my aromantism, and i’m still working through it.

Four years pass between their graduation from hogwarts and the war ending. And, unless his family were death eaters or he was sucked into it during school and noone noticed, it had to of been Dumbledore fault. Because he joined the order with the rest of them.

If peter hadn't been in the order i could see the argument that he could've fallen into it after hogwarts the same way real life hate groups will pray on freshly moved out and isolated teenagers. But that's not what happened.

Fandomwise peter is usually characterized as ugly, stupid, and untalented. But that comes from how he acts post living as a rat for twelve years, and a single line from mcgonagall calling him a stupid, foolish bot who was never on the same level as black and or the other students. That's her seeing him as a child who she practically raised getting himself killed in the stupidest way possible. Not as a person in general.

What was my point...

the way the black sisters would have the entire fandom in a fucking chokehold if they were boys. do you actually think sirius and regulus would be as cherished as they are now if they were women? hell fucking no, regulus would be hated on so badly. the way we were given narcissa and fucking andromeda too? here’s the entire fandom yapping on and on about how cool regulus is for rebelling against the dark lord when narcissa was doing it and fucking getting away with it too (because she’s better and doesn’t suck ass). here’s andromeda going against her entire bloodline ON HER OWN but yet shes still so overshadowed by sirius (who literally came after her). then you got bellatrix who is canonly one of the most powerful (and cuntiest) witches in the hp-verse and you decide to go and develop BARTY instead. think about it. they’re both crazy except one is more of a loser and is a male so of course the fandom will choose him.

ok but the httyd books are seriously the best, i love the movies but im sorry the books are just subjectively better sorry i dont make the rules