Infinite Space

i legiterately always feel like that person on reddit who posted "is it weird if i go on a walk like is everyone gonna be freaked out". i feel like that every minute of every day

I love that thing when people get a little bit tongue-tied and garble what they’re trying to say so they make a little “blegh” 👅 noise and start over. verbal reset button. hitting the top of the tv to unscramble the signal

i get that its popular but has anyone thought about how fucked up the truman show is? like it was really funny last week when he tripped over that bird but think about it... he doesnt know...

okay if you care so much then don't watch 🙄 people are always whining about the show but I knowwww you're tuning in. besides he's never known anything else at this point it'd be cruel to end the show. like what are they gonna do? just release him into the wild?

one must imagine sisyphus in margaritaville

my life isnt perfect but at least im not doing a mans laundry

What the fuck is wrong with doing a MAN'S laundry? You just throw it in with your own wtf this app never ceases to amaze me especially if it's your MAN what the fuck????

^ this is your brain on man’s laundry 🍳

STOP REBLOGGING THIS my phone is glitching an astronomical amount and I immediately knew the culprit was one of my tumblr posts gaining traction

DONT STOP ME NOW!

I don't remember finding fart jokes particularly funny even when I was a child.

Five year old me, watching a movie with fart jokes: "Oh, how gauche. They're pandering to the lowest common denominator."

first rule of storing tupperware is have fun and be yourself. second suggestion is slam the cabinet door quickly and don’t worry ‘bout it.

if they're gonna remake The Princess Bride, it should open with a kid sick in bed scrolling on his phone. his grandpa arrives with a gift--it's a DVD player with a disc already inside. grandpa hooks it up to the TV and presses play. and we all just watch the original 1987 film again.