The Alpha's Oracle

The boy replied, “My name is Hans, and though it may be wrong, “Your bet’s pretty intriguing, so I guess I’ll play along”

Hans, clean out your spit valves, and get ready for a show, Two tubas feudin’ face to face; pick up your horn and blow. ‘Cause if you win, you get a brand new tuba made of gold, And if you lose the Devil gets your soul!

(Oompah music intensifies)

The Devil opened up his case and said, “I’ll start, I guess.” And fire puffed out from the bell as on the valves he pressed He raised the mouthpiece to his lips, it made a wicked BLART And a band of lederhosen demons joined in with him to start

(Roll Out the Barrel plays with extended tuba solo)

Hans looked the Devil in the eye, once he finished his piece, Said “That’s okay, old man, but just you get a load of this!”

(http://youtu.be/zmFYgc-Emmc and skip to 2:20)

The Devil bowed his head, because he knew he can’t compete. He dragged that heavy tuba down; it crashed by Hans’s feet. He turned away from Hans and as he retreated he said, “Forget this crap. I’m gonna try telemarketing instead.”

Fiddles are historically associated with the devil not through any Christian imagery, but because older European folk tradition held that several uber powerful water demons, known as nock, nikyr, necks, etc, were insanely good fiddle players.

In Norway, for example, the violin known as the Hardanger fiddle was played initially by the creepy otherwordly beings, like the hulderfolk, the trolls, as well as the nock. There are equivalents in other European cultures.

These beings were known as preternaturally skilled fiddle players, the nocks above all others. So some people would make a deal to learn the fiddle from the nock, or have their children trained. The only problem being nocks usually needed life or blood sacrifices to learn their skills.

So as Christianity was introduced, the water demon nock was conflated with the devil. Because other stories of nykyrs, nocks, etc were generally sacrificing a human to appease treacherous tides, which was the pinnacle of terror.

The all-cleric party (via outofcontextdnd)

(via outofcontextdnd)

Hello, my name is Ruth and I heartily approve this message.

We want all our food prepared with space knives.

A few members of Team Dresden have let me know some people have been kind of jerky about what readers have created or dressed up as from the casefiles.

I’ve said this before here and will say it again: don’t make fun of what other people do to show their affection for a fandom. If you do and I find out about it - don’t care if it’s my casefiles or something else - I will unleash hellfire on you, at least in print.

The world is an ugly place. Make it better instead of making it worse.

And let it not be said that I am not a staunch proponent of the arts. Express yourselves however you wish. That is what the artistic form encompasses. However, along with the creation of art, comes the right of others to critique that art. It is the hallmark of a small mind to be unable to withstand criticism of their art, of any sort. If you wish to express yourself, be the mature and educated individual who understands that others are just as free to express their rejection of your expression, in the manner they choose. The mere act of creating something does not, and will never, insulate you from criticism. Do ‘grow up,’ I believe the phrase is.

Dresden here offers you insincere platitudes, giving you only what you want to hear. Here I stand, offering you the truth, and total honesty. Choose wisely which words are more valuable to you, for it will determine for us all whether you truly are a prisoner of fantasy, or a functioning member of reality.

Have a pleasant day, one and all.

And because I risk going 'splodey, one teensy little poke; last I checked, NA stood for "not applicable," right?

A few members of Team Dresden have let me know some people have been kind of jerky about what readers have created or dressed up as from the casefiles.

I’ve said this before here and will say it again: don’t make fun of what other people do to show their affection for a fandom. If you do and I find out about it - don’t care if it’s my casefiles or something else - I will unleash hellfire on you, at least in print.

The world is an ugly place. Make it better instead of making it worse.

And let it not be said that I am not a staunch proponent of the arts. Express yourselves however you wish. That is what the artistic form encompasses. However, along with the creation of art, comes the right of others to critique that art. It is the hallmark of a small mind to be unable to withstand criticism of their art, of any sort. If you wish to express yourself, be the mature and educated individual who understands that others are just as free to express their rejection of your expression, in the manner they choose. The mere act of creating something does not, and will never, insulate you from criticism. Do ‘grow up,’ I believe the phrase is.

Dresden here offers you insincere platitudes, giving you only what you want to hear. Here I stand, offering you the truth, and total honesty. Choose wisely which words are more valuable to you, for it will determine for us all whether you truly are a prisoner of fantasy, or a functioning member of reality.

Have a pleasant day, one and all.

don’t touch me

wait, no, come back, i need snuggles

that’s enough snuggles

i want to be near you, please don’t leave me alone

tch, it’s not like i happen to be in the same room as you all the time because i miss you

“i got wet. this is the worst thing that’s ever happened”

“why is this door closed? this door doesn’t need to be closed”

“i need a nap.” “didn’t you just wake up 2 hours ago?” “yes but i could sleep for a week”

(hisses)

“i want food”

“but not this food”