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summary: You were Seungkwan’s first love and he realises the feelings haven’t gone away the second you step through the doors of the flower shop.
wc: 6,421
tags: non-idol au, first blooms collab, tension, first love, loads of yearning from both sides, seungkwan is a bit oblivious, reader is a yapper, pure and 100% fluff
a/n: hehehe hello im back for the first blooms collab for @svthub
There was something inherently healing about being a florist. At least at the flower shop where Seungkwan worked, he encountered many things that captured the beauties of life; a bouquet for Valentine’s day, flowers to make up after a fight, flowers just because.
When someone came in asking for recommendations for a first date bouquet, he excitedly walked them through the perfect flowers. Another one wanted a bouquet for their loved ones going through a tough time. With pride ringing in his chest, he talked about the meaning of the flowers he picked out for her. When he helped one of his favourite regulars reconcile with his girlfriend, Seungkwan watched on with a smile as they embraced each other tightly.
He had seen it all, warmth spreading through his body and a stinging feeling in his chest. Without admitting it, even to himself, he was waiting for the day that he would be the one at the receiving end.
Throughout the following weeks, his days became harder to bear with every passing hour. He thought of himself as pathetic for letting it affect him so much, as if someone else’s happiness should be his shortcomings. Still, seeing life play out in front of him so frequently made him wonder how much he was missing out on.
Seungkwan entered the shop early in the morning, storing the load that had been delivered and updating inventory like any other day. He greeted his coworkers that came in after him, helping him set up the shop, per usual. He helped the regulars of that day, watched customers whip in, look around and leave, never seeing them again.
He went home, made the same dinner, watched the same show or hung out with the same friends and he came to realise: his life was actually becoming a bore. He needed some action.
Seungkwan was behind the counter, making the new seasonal bouquets when one of the regulars stood in front of him. He watched her lean on her hand with a cheeky smile, waving his hand to the back. “My coworker is right over there. He can tell you about our new recommendations,” he spoke and held the flowers up. “I’m busy.”
“And what if I want to hear it from you?”
“Then you’re clearly trying to make me feel better.”
She nudged him. “Come on, Droopy. What’s going on with you?”
Seungkwan shook his head with a small smile. “Nothing, just doing long days now business is booming.”
The regular and friend narrowed her eyes, but left it at that. She nodded and pointed to the back of the shop. “I’ll leave you to it then. Your colleague can help me as well.”
He nodded and turned back to the flowers, neatly spread out over the counter. He stuck two sunflowers in the middle, grabbing a bush of thistle and tucking it in gently. With a lily and some dahlias, he finished it off and put it to the side. With another handful of sunflowers, he made one with a variety of yellow flowers with green branches in between.
Sunflowers were the highlight of the summer, resembling them in a way that no other flower could. Happiness, loyalty, adoration and hope, a symbol of optimism that dragged him through the slums of the day.
His coworker slid past Seungkwan and did the checkout with his friend. He cut the branches a little shorter and smiled at her.
As she walked out, someone bumped into her on the way in. She made way for the new customer before flying out of the door, but Seungkwan’s attention was on the flowers again. He put them in a bucket and moved them to the shop window.
Pride rang in his chest when his bouquets were on display. He was at his best when he was assembling them, carefully curating where each flower would go.
Seungkwan heard his coworker sending someone over to him, but he perfected the display until it was showing its best side. When he turned around, someone grabbed his arm for stability.
“Sorry,” a warm voice said to him, chuckling softly. “I didn’t realise you were going to turn around so soon.”
His heart stopped. His eyes darted everywhere but at the person in front of him. His thoughts were racing a million miles per hour and he was unable to make sense of anything. He thought he was over it, he really was.
You smiled at him when finally looked at you. Until it faded a little he was happy that you did, but a pit formed in his stomach when you observed him closely.
Seungkwan felt his face flush– no. His entire body flushed. He rolled his shoulders back and cleared his throat.
“Seungkwan,” you said gently, the hint of surprise in your voice made his heart drop. You looked around and chuckled. “Well, it makes sense that you’re here.”
He chuckled nervously and crossed his arms behind his back. “I… Well, here I am.”
You smiled, your entire face lighting up when you did. Your cheeks glowed, your eyes twinkled the same after a decade, scanning every inch of his face.
He could barely stand on his own two feet anymore.
You shook your head. “Sorry, um,” with rosy cheeks, you smiled. “I actually came here for a bouquet. Your colleague said you could help me with that.”
Seungkwan looked over at Chan sticking his thumb up. He pressed his lips into a thin smile before turning to you. “Yes, I can. Do you have something in mind?”
“My manager is going through a tough time,” you said with a small smile. “I know she loves flowers, so I want to give her a nice bouquet to let her know I’m there for her.”
Seungkwan’s stomach tingled, a smile tugging at his lips. “That’s very thoughtful of you, actually. I’m sure she’ll appreciate it.”
You wrote it off as basic human decency, for Seungkwan it was his reminder why he was in love with you once.
He motioned for you to follow him and took you to the back of the shop. “I have some bouquets ready to go, but you can also assemble one yourself if you want to add your personal touch,” he explained and turned to you.
You glanced at your watch and offered an apologetic smile. “I don’t have long, so one of yours has to do this time.”
This time. Seungkwan’s mind started racing with possibilities again.
He stepped aside. “I’m sure there’s something that catches your eye, but I have special bouquets for your situation if you’d like me to point them out.”
You watched them curiously. “You do?”
Seungkwan couldn’t help but smile and nodded. He pointed at the white and green bouquet. “All of these flowers represent support, strength or resilience, like the white chrysanthemum for example, and the green rose.”
When he locked eyes with you, his cheeks flushed. “Um… but you can also go for something more cheerful? Yellow flowers, or her favourite colour perhaps?”
Your lips twisted into a smile. “The white bouquet is beautiful, Seungkwan. I’ll take that.”
He nodded and took it from the bucket, taking you back to the counter. “Would you like a card with it?”
You rummaged in your bag and held one up.
“Thought of everything, huh?”
“Ah, well.” Your cheeks tinted a light pink and put it back.
Seungkwan smiled and wrapped the bouquet in foil before placing it on the counter, putting the order in the register. “Would you like to grab a cup of coffee soon?” He heard himself ask. His fingers hovered above the buttons as his eyes darted your way. “I… Mean… We haven’t seen each other in so long so I thought, maybe we can catch up?”
“I would like that,” you answered with a smile and pointed across the street. “That place looks nice. We can meet there around this time next week?” You proposed and held your card against the reader. “I wish I had a gap this week, but I’m packed–”
“Next week is perfect,” he assured you and handed you the bouquet along with the receipt. “I’ll make sure to be there.”
You took it and thanked him.
“You can tell me how much she liked it,” he added with a wink, to which you chuckled.
“Just tell me if you want me to feed your ego.”
“I’ll never say no to that.”
You smiled and waved. “See you next week, Seungkwan.”
He watched you walk out of the shop and his entire body felt like it was on fire. He smiled to himself and fell back into his usual rhythm.
The rest of the week flew by in a blink of an eye. As quickly as Seungkwan opened the shop in the morning, he could close it when the afternoon was almost over. He wasn't looking forward to the moment he would be able to go home. In fact, for the first time in months he was sad to leave the place behind for the night.
Seungkwan kept an eye on the coffeehouse across the street, leaning against the counter. He fixed a loose hair in the shop window, but his eyes darted back quickly. He clutched his shirt, heart galloping in his chest as the time crept closer to 10am.
“You know,” Chan started, “when you asked me to cover for you, you could’ve stayed home.”
“I’m across the street,” Seungkwan answered with a shrug. “Just dropped in to see how you were doing.”
“You’re way too concerned over a business that is doing well.”
When the clock struck ten, he pushed himself up. He tapped the counter and nodded at Chan. “Call me if something comes up.”
“I hope I won’t have to,” Chan replied with a grin. “I would hate to interrupt your date.”
Seungkwan rolled his eyes, but his cheeks flushed. He walked out of the door and crossed the street. He looked around for a sign of you before he went inside. The smell of coffee and pastries greeted him at the first step. He waved at the barista and walked towards the back.
He halted in his tracks and when you locked eyes, the world stopped spinning.
You were on the couch, two coffees in front of you. Your smile lit up the room, your eyes twinkling.
He swallowed and walked over to you.
You held a cup up. “Iced Americano?”
Seungkwan thought of all the times people told him that he was too clingy, that you would get tired of him being around you all the time, but how could he not when this was how you waited for him?
He took it with a bright smile. “How did you…”
“I hoped I was still right,” you answered and pulled your cup towards you quickly. A grin formed on your face. “Guess what I have, though.”
“Let me think.” He sat down with a hum. “Is it… a cappuccino with oat milk and an extra shot of espresso?”
You lit up and Seungkwan became a puddle at your feet, even though your feelings had long withered away.
“Are you back in town?” He asked and stirred his americano with the straw.
“Since a month,” you answered with a hum. “I got an incredible job offer that I simply couldn’t refuse.”
He looked up at you, a grin tugging at his lips. “‘If you ever catch me returning to this shithole...’”
“Yeah, yeah,” you rolled your eyes with a chuckle, “very hypocritical, I know.” With your hands wrapped around the cup, you leaned back in your seat. You looked out of the window. “It has changed a lot since the last time I was here. I didn’t know it was capable of change.”
“Yeah, well, when a lot of citizens and small business owners leave because you’re putting them at a disadvantage, you have to do something.” He tapped the table with his index finger. “Before this coffee house, there were at least four different stores. We’ve seen them all wither from the other side of the street.”
You hid your smile behind the cup. “Means that your business is doing well at least.”
“I guess it does, yeah.” Seungkwan put his cup down. “What did your manager think of the flowers?”
You put the cup down in a hurry and slapped your hands on the table. “That’s what I needed to remember!”
He tilted his head with a hum. His eyes remained strictly on yours, before he would lose himself in you.
“She loved them!” You exclaimed excitedly. “She asked me where I got them from so I explained, but she’s on the other side of town so she’d never heard of it and I lost your business card.”
Seungkwan’s lips twisted into a smile. “I can give you one later? Is that what you wanted to ask?”
“Yes!” You rubbed his hand and took a sip. “You’re a doll.”
His hand tingled. A buzz shot through his body and his cheeks flushed. “It’s no problem, really,” he managed to tell you. “I mean, we have plenty so it’s not like I’ll miss one.”
You looked at each other for a second before you broke into a grin.
Seungkwan looked away and cleared his throat. “Anyway.”
“Hey.”
He looked your way again, watching your eyes soften.
“It’s good to see you again, Seungkwan.”
Seungkwan nodded and scratched his neck. “Of the same.”
You ordered another round and shared a slice of red velvet cake before you had to part ways. Seungkwan had his entire schedule cleared, even though deep down he knew it wasn’t necessary.
“I have to pick up an order for mum, then I’m meeting with my old friends for lunch, I’m squeezing a workout in there and tonight, I finally have a night to myself,” you told him as you were crossing the street. “Any fun plans on your end?”
“Hoping my colleagues didn’t burn the shop down.”
You pushed him playfully. “Don’t be mean. I’m sure they’re taking good care of it in your absence.”
He didn’t have the heart to tell you that he was barely absent.
Seungkwan pushed through the door and let you pass. He walked up to the counter for a business card, ignoring the look he got from Chan.
Him altogether, actually.
He joined you back at the front of the shop and gave you the card. Watching you observe the flowers made a warmth spread through his chest.
You looked up at him. “These carnations are adorable.” You hovered over them and inhaled. “And they smell amazing.”
Seungkwan nudged you. “You know your flowers.”
“I learned from the best.” You came up. “Can I take some for my mum? She will love the pink ones.”
He reached for the bucket and grabbed some. “I think they will pair well with white.”
“Perfect!”
Seungkwan smiled and grabbed some baby’s breaths and kamini’s to fill the bouquet up, slipping behind the counter to assemble the bouquet.
“He has trouble not working when he asks for a day off,” he heard Chan telling you, followed by your chuckles.
His heart skipped a beat.
“Always had that,” you responded.
“Do you know each other?”
“We dated until I moved away for college,” you said to Chan.
Seungkwan’s cheeks were a furious shade of red, feeling his coworker’s eyes on him. He crouched to grab a piece of paper and wrapped the flowers together.
“For how long?”
“Four years.”
Chan’s eyes burned into him by that point.
Seungkwan gave the bouquet to you. “I’ll take care of it.” You opened your mouth, but he spoke ahead of you. “As long as you tell your mum hi from me, I’m satisfied.”
You took it from him with pink cheeks. “Thank you, Seungkwan. She’ll be very happy to hear from you again.”
He watched you leave, a smile carved into his face that wouldn’t go away for the rest of the day.
Even though he had no way of contacting you.
Seungkwan was a wreck when he found that out. If fate was a thing, you’d walked back into his life five years ago. He’d never stopped to think about which phone numbers got lost when he got a new number, if they even got lost at all.
He never realised that you couldn’t even reach him even if you wanted to, taking it as a sign from the universe to get over himself.
He’d gotten the chance to love you once. His karma had to be incredible for him to be able to love you a second time.
Seungkwan was in the warehouse, spitting through inventory and noting down everything he had to order. He threw out flowers that were withering, putting buckets aside that he would take back to the front when he was done.
His rhythm was back to its dull, unadventurous way.
With a pen tucked behind his ear, he reorganised the storage. Thoughtless, for once, only worried about efficiency and structure.
He grabbed some of the buckets and dragged them back into the shop, putting them by his feet and observing them closely. His heart skipped a beat when he saw white carnations again, but he pushed the thought away.
When he was at the back for the remaining bucket, Chan called out to him.
Seungkwan walked back and shot him a look.
You shot him an apologetic smile. “I’m so sorry to bother you at work.”
He quickly shook his head and smiled at you. “What’s up?”
“I don’t have your number.”
His breath caught in his throat, his heart jumping in his chest. Seungkwan scrambled to get his phone out of his pocket and gave it to you. He cleared his throat and rubbed his hands off on his pants. “So, how did your mother like the bouquet?”
A smile played on your lips. “As predicted, she loved it. She started bombarding me with questions about you which I could not answer.”
"We have to text a lot, then."
"We'll be caught up in no time." You gave his phone back and pointed to the door. "I need to head to my friend's. Thank you for making time for me."
Seungkwan smiled. "Always."
You waved and walked out of the door.
After taking a week off — his colleagues begged him to before he collapsed — Seungkwan was back at the shop before the weekend would ring in. He was at the back while Chan stayed out front, taking care of the deliveries that had just been made and storing them properly. He took some of the buckets to the front with him to make bouquets, placing them in the shop window for display.
As he was working on a sunflower bouquet, the shop door opened.
Seungkwan looked up an his heart skipped a beat. "Hey."
"Hey there, holidaymaker!" You waved excitedly and walked up to the counter. "Happy to be back here?"
"Back where I belong," he answered with a smile. "What can I do for you?"
"My colleague's retiring." You placed a hand on your chest with twinkling eyes. "I was put in charge of getting a present and I wanted to do a bouquet on the side."
Seungkwan nodded and put the bouquet to the side. "Anything particular in mind?"
"She loves the colour yellow?"
He smiled and moved away from the counter, motioning his head at you. As you followed him to the left side of the shop, he spoke. "Yellow is a very common colour these months, so you're in luck."
"It's a very positive colour."
He agreed and pointed at the buckets. "You can do a sunflower bouquet, or you get a mix of yellow and orange flowers to give her. It's whatever she prefers, and what catches your eye the most, of course."
You bobbed along. "Can you tell me about the yellow flowers?"
Seungkwan felt the heat flushing his cheeks. "Yeah, of course." He cleared his throat and grabbed one out of the bucket. "I put a sunflower in the middle here as a focal point. It expresses admiration, loyalty and a non-romantic love."
He pointed at the flower next to it. "I put some marigold in it to represent happiness, some orchids for well wishes and orange roses to break up the yellow. They stand for enthusiasm and energy, in this case."
As he grabbed the other bouquet, he locked eyes with you. His stomach tingled when you smiled.
"I also made one with a yellow dahlia as focal point, but they more so represent a commitment shared forever in this case, as well as the pansies and the yarrow. It's rather a love bouquet, to keep it short."
You pointed at the one in the bucket. "That one fits the occasion more, I'd say."
Seungkwan agreed with a chuckle and grabbed it, walking back to the counter.
"God, it's gorgeous," you breathed out as you followed him. "I almost want to keep it myself."
"I'll take that as a compliment."
"You definitely should." You held the card against the reader. "Seungkwan, you're a doll. Thank you so much!"
Seungkwan watched you leave with flaming hot cheeks.
Later that week, he got a text from you telling him how much she loved the bouquet. You even forwarded the picture of your colleague, where the bouquet was standing on the saloon table in the living room.
He felt himself slipping away the more he talked to you.
Seungkwan came back from his lunch break, a cup of coffee in hand when he halted in his tracks.
You stood at the counter with a smile, declaring that your friend was getting married and you wanted to congratulate her with a bouquet. Once again, Seungkwan spent his time talking to you about the bouquets he made until you settled for a white one, keeping it simple but thoughtful.
The smile you left with was the same.
Chan watched the interaction and flashed him a grin. "She's becoming our biggest source of income this way."
After the weekend, you stood in front of his nose again. For the first time, you were there for yourself, opting that you needed a nice bouquet in your living room.
Seungkwan didn't mind having you wander around the store for thirty minutes if that made you happy with the bouquet you made. He told you he would take care of it for you and your smile had lit the room up.
That same night you video called him, showing the bouquet standing in your living room. Seungkwan only hung up when you declared you needed to go to bed. If he didn't, you would've stayed up until the middle of the night to talk to him.
Every day that passed since then, Seungkwan hoped that you would walk through the doors.
After two weeks of absence, you were there again. Your mother's friend wanted a bouquet with pink and white carnations just like the one you gave to your mother.
Seungkwan happily obliged and yet again, you were the happiest woman on earth when you left the store. He watched with the heat spreading through his body, smiling to himself before he went back to work.
"That's the fourth time this month alone," Chan commented and turned to his colleague. "And coincidentally, she comes in when you're at work."
Seungkwan arched an eyebrow. "Meaning?"
"That — for some bizarre reason — she keeps seeking you out." When he stayed silent, Chan deadpanned him. "Oh, come on. You can't tell me that you hadn't noticed."
He shrugged and wrapped the small rose bouquet together.
"I can say with absolute certainty that even Minghao has noticed."
"What have I noticed?"
Seungkwan's head shot up.
Minghao halted in his tracks, a flannel shirt loosely hugging his slender body and blond hair partially hidden under a cap. His sharp eyes peeked at him curiously.
"Seungkwan has a not-so secret admirer," Chan said without missing a beat. "His ex-girlfriend has been coming in here constantly." He held four fingers up. "Four times this month."
"In my defence, we split up on good terms," Seungkwan cut in. "Ten years ago."
Minghao bobbed his head. "So Seungkwan likes her back, I assume."
Chan turned to him and smiled sweetly, but he just scoffed and put the bouquet in the display.
"That's a yes."
"Chan is convinced she's here for me, but I think she just wants to be sweet to the people around her." Seungkwan shrugged. "That's how she's always been. She's caring, loves seeing people happy. It's not uncharacteristic for her to stop by so often."
"Like the talking isn't uncharacteristic either, just like with you."
He glared at his colleague.
"So just return the favour and give her a bouquet."
Seungkwan's eyes darted to Minghao.
"You seem to know what she likes, you like her. I don't see why not." He grabbed his package from the counter and smiled. "From what I hear, she seems to be seeking you out on purpose. You'll miss out if you don't."
Seungkwan was the only one left in the shop later that week, still pondering over what his friends had said about you. He hated that he was convinced of their case, how it made his heart beat faster. He wanted to find out, to see how you felt about him. He needed to know how much was still left of what you once had.
When he looked at the clock, it was a little over 4pm. He still had two hours to kill until the shop would close, it was as good as cleaned and there hadn't been a customer in over an hour.
Seungkwan decided to put the order in early and grabbed his laptop from out back, setting it on the counter. As he was selecting the flowers, the door opened. He looked up and smiled. "Good afternoon."
You turned around and waved at him. "Hi, Seungkwan!"
He stumbled over his words before he was able to get something out, making you chuckle. God, that was the best sound in the world.
"I'm here for a bulk order, actually," you said and leaned your elbows on the counter. "Is that possible?"
Seungkwan bobbed his head and put the order through before shoving his laptop aside. "It's a minimum delivery time of two weeks, though, depending on our inventory."
"It's in a month so we have time!"
He heard his friends in the back of his mind, his heart pulsing in his ears and for some reason, his ability to think before he spoke magically left him.
He flashed you a grin. "You know, you can just say you want to see me."
"Yeah, actually. For the bulk order."
Seungkwan cleared his throat and shifted his weight to his other leg. "Right, so. We can deliver roses, or multi flower bouquets…"
You nodded. "Well, um, it's a business event so something professional, but fun."
"White, pink and orange?"
"Yep, perfect."
Seungkwan scribbled it down. His eyes darted up at you, but you looked away. "Any preference for flowers?"
"Nope. Go crazy."
He wrote your name above the notes and came up. "I suspect a normal delivery period, but we'll notify you if something comes up."
"Could you send them over to the venue actually?" You asked. "The day before would be perfect."
Seungkwan nodded and wrote it down. "We'll keep in touch."
Your fingers drummed on the counter before you stepped away. You took small, slow steps towards the exit, looking around as if you hadn't seen the store a thousand times before.
He called out to you.
You looked over your shoulder, your hand on the door handle.
"You don't have to keep coming here if you want to see me," he said.
Your cheeks flushed a rose pink. "I like to see you at your best." With those words, you left the shop. You locked eyes through the window one more time and you smiled at him shyly before you disappeared into the crowd.
Seungkwan was reminded of everything that he loved about you.
He was on edge, even more so than before. He was in the shop more than he was scheduled for, all to try and put his mind to anything else before he was consumed by you. His coworkers looked at him funny and he was sure they whispered behind his back, but he could not bring himself to care.
Seungkwan told Chan he would be in to make the new bouquets on his day off and did just that. If Chan refrained from speaking his mind or he sensed that Seungkwan really needed the distraction, he didn't know. Once again, he couldn't bring himself to care.
As he was assembling a rose bouquet, the door of the shop opened.
Seungkwan looked up, watching how Minghao strolled up to the counter. "I was wondering if my favourite regular was ever going to come back," he teased.
Minghao chuckled, sliding his hands into his pocket. "Duty never stops calling. I'm here for a bouquet, like usual."
"I've just been making them." He held a rose bouquet up.
"I don't have to look any further, then."
"Makes my job easy." Seungkwan grinned and wrapped it in foil for him. "Any special occasion?"
"Not really." Minghao hummed and got his card out, holding it against the reader. "Just an 'I love you.' She deserves it every day, but otherwise her apartment would be filled with flowers and she'll go back to hating them."
His grin was replaced by a warm smile. "I'm very sure that she'll love it." He gave his friend the flowers. "Tell her I said hi."
"I will." Minghao saluted him and turned on his heel. He looked over his shoulder and smiled before walking out of the store.
Seungkwan looked down at the flowers. When the bouquet was laying in front of him, he swiped his own card against the reader and put it in the back.
The thought of your smile was enough to make the heat pool in his stomach before it spread through the rest of his body.
He was about to get himself into dangerous waters.
That night, Seungkwan sat in the car in front of your apartment block, hands clutching the wheel. He told himself that there was no reason to be nervous. In fact, this was by far not the first time he'd stood on your doorstep unannounced, but after all those years…
He shook his head, took a deep breath and got out of the car. He grabbed the bouquet from the backseat and shut the car, walking up to the door. His finger trembled when he rang your bell, and his breath hitched when there was crackling on the other side of the line.
"Hello!"
Your excitement etched a smile into his face. He leaned forward into the microphone. "It's me."
"Seungkwan! What are you doing here?"
"Do I need a reason for a visit?"
Your chuckles made the heat pool in his stomach. "I'll open the door for you."
The door buzzed and Seungkwan pushed it open, walking straight into the elevator. As it brought him to the fourth floor, he fixed the collar of his blouse and ran a hand through his hair.
Seungkwan stepped into the hallway and turned to the left, knocking on the apartment at the end of the hall. His heart ached for you, reigniting a spark that he thought had long died out. That he thought he'd left behind when you broke up.
When you appeared in the doorway, he proved himself wrong.
"You'll never guess what I brought you," he spoke, to which you pretended to think.
"I would say flowers," you finally said and leaned against the frame. "Couldn't be too sure."
Seungkwan smiled and held the bouquet out.
You observed it as you took it from him. You lit up, making his stomach tingle. "My favourite flowers! How did you know?!"
"I just hoped nothing had changed."
Your arms flew around his neck, your face nuzzling in the crook.
Seungkwan clung onto your waist for stability. He closed his eyes and hummed softly. "Sorry for barging in unannounced. I just… I don't know. I had to see you."
"Apology rejected."
He chuckled softly and pulled back when you did, observing every inch of your face. When a lock blocked your eyes, he tucked it behind your ear.
Your cheeks flushed, a bright smile tugging at your lips. You leaned in, pushing yourself up on your tippy toes.
Seungkwan met you halfway in a kiss that sealed him forever. Every memory you made flashed before his eyes. It all seemed so innocent at the time, his sisters had even told him that first loves would never last. Theirs hadn't, why would his?
And for years, he believed them. When you left for college and the distance would be unbearable for the both of you, Seungkwan had told himself that it would blow over. You would find someone new, and he would, too.
But after ten years, on that faithful day that you walked through the doors of his shop, he realised that his heart still beat for you. And it never stopped doing that for you.
When you pulled back, his eyes stayed shut.
"I'm free tonight," you whispered.
Seungkwan smiled as they fluttered open. "We should get dinner, then."
Your head shot up and Seungkwan regretted opening his mouth. You observed him closely, narrowing your eyes. They disappeared under a bright grin. “Boo Seungkwan, are you asking me out?”
“Would you say yes if I did?”
There was a challenging look in your eyes that made his heart beat faster. You could feel it if you moved your hands closer. “Shall we try?”
He locked eyes with you and leaned forward. “Would you like to go on a date with me?”
"Lead the way."
Seungkwan took you to an Italian restaurant just out of town. He discovered it on his way home, when he needed to take a detour. Overridden by hunger, he went in. Since then, he never went to another Italian restaurant again.
It was cozy, almost like you went into the owners' home. A couple of people were seated here and there, the smell of fresh pasta and garlic dancing all around you.
You looked around you and muttered underneath your breath. "This is adorable!" You told Seungkwan. "And it smells nice."
Seungkwan smiled and placed a hand on your back. "Come on, let's search for a table." He looked down and cleared his throat. He retreated his hand and folded it behind his back.
Your cheeks tinted a light pink and you looked away from him.
He mentally cussed himself out. At least he was making his intentions clear if he let his hand sit there, but the last thing he wanted was to make you uncomfortable. Maybe you were just there to see what there was to rekindle between you.
Seungkwan watched you plop on the couch and smiled, sitting across from you on a chair. "How about we order a bottle of red wine to share between us?"
"I do love a good red wine," you answered and rubbed your chin. "Do they have Primitivo here?"
"The best I've ever had."
You nodded with a smile. "Perfect. We'll get that then."
He gave you the menu that sat on the table and leaned back in his seat. His heart warmed when he saw you mouthing along the words, your brows knitted together. Every once in a while, you bobbed your head. You hadn't even properly registered that Seungkwan ordered a bottle of wine until you had a glass in front of your nose.
Your head shot up and you shot him a small smile. "I was so engulfed in the menu. Thank you for ordering."
"I always eat the same thing here so I don't even have to look."
"I expected as much."
Seungkwan cocked an eyebrow, but you just shrugged. He leaned forward. "Are you saying I don't try new things?"
"Considering your days are always the same." Your eyes flicked up. A smile played on your lips and you slapped his hand lightly. "It's not a bad thing, Seungkwan. Not everyone needs to have an adventurous life."
He stayed silent.
"Maybe that's their way of saying they don't have the right people around them," you said and leaned back with your glass of wine. "Maybe the reason people are chasing the limits is because they're scared to settle down and have enough with the ones closest to them. You never know."
"I didn't know college had made you so wise."
You hid your smile behind the wine, but he saw the corners of your mouth peeking out through the glass.
Seungkwan leaned on his hand and looked at you. "I'm happy to have you back in my non-adventurous, boring life."
"And this time I won't leave." You held your pinky out.
He laced it together with his and pressed a kiss to it.
You were right; he didn't have to lead a thrilling life to be happy, or to make you happy for that matter. In all truth, he was content with where he was. The flower shop was running well and you were back in his life.
Back in his arms.
Seungkwan couldn't remember the last time he looked forward to doing inventory, cleaning the storage or having to order new flowers. His day-to-day tasks became an adventure in itself.
With your bi-weekly visits to the shop, his colleagues were jokingly calling you the mother of the shop. You embraced your new title with open arms, even helping out whenever you had the time.
You were helping to close the shop, dragging the buckets to the back and wiping the floors clean.
Seungkwan couldn't help but admire you as he was finalising his order. When you looked his way, a pool of heat formed in his stomach before spreading through his entire body.
You skipped over to him and pressed a kiss to his lips. "Ready when you are."
He wrapped an arm around you, locking you into his side. He listened as you talked about the event. He smiled when there was a skip in your step, excitement ringing in your voice.
And suddenly, when he looked around him, the world was a little brighter than it was before.
felt so honoured that kay let me beta-read this before it came out! i read it so fast but it really felt like a journey <3 it was so fun to read and really immerse myself in this story <3
seungkwan still being so in denial of reader's feelings for him is such a me thing LOL i always try to convince myself that the person who likes me, doesn't actually like me and everyone arnd me is kidding abt it LOL
but seungkwan yearning for someone and wanting someone to give him flowers too is so ugh, yearner kwannie is soooo good and i love it
kay, you're such an amazing writer and im so glad to have met you through this space and honestly, getting to beta-read for u (after fangirling about date night was such a twist that i couldn't have expected <3)
i love youuu ahhh and i can't wait for the rest of the fics that you have planned <3
liv you are so so SO sweet. im also so happy that we met through caratblr and it's so much fun to take you on my writing journeys with me. i love you so much my sweet darling <3
summary: You were Seungkwan’s first love and he realises the feelings haven’t gone away the second you step through the doors of the flower shop.
wc: 6,421
tags: non-idol au, first blooms collab, tension, first love, loads of yearning from both sides, seungkwan is a bit oblivious, reader is a yapper, pure and 100% fluff
a/n: hehehe hello im back for the first blooms collab for @svthub
There was something inherently healing about being a florist. At least at the flower shop where Seungkwan worked, he encountered many things that captured the beauties of life; a bouquet for Valentine’s day, flowers to make up after a fight, flowers just because.
When someone came in asking for recommendations for a first date bouquet, he excitedly walked them through the perfect flowers. Another one wanted a bouquet for their loved ones going through a tough time. With pride ringing in his chest, he talked about the meaning of the flowers he picked out for her. When he helped one of his favourite regulars reconcile with his girlfriend, Seungkwan watched on with a smile as they embraced each other tightly.
He had seen it all, warmth spreading through his body and a stinging feeling in his chest. Without admitting it, even to himself, he was waiting for the day that he would be the one at the receiving end.
Throughout the following weeks, his days became harder to bear with every passing hour. He thought of himself as pathetic for letting it affect him so much, as if someone else’s happiness should be his shortcomings. Still, seeing life play out in front of him so frequently made him wonder how much he was missing out on.
Seungkwan entered the shop early in the morning, storing the load that had been delivered and updating inventory like any other day. He greeted his coworkers that came in after him, helping him set up the shop, per usual. He helped the regulars of that day, watched customers whip in, look around and leave, never seeing them again.
He went home, made the same dinner, watched the same show or hung out with the same friends and he came to realise: his life was actually becoming a bore. He needed some action.
Seungkwan was behind the counter, making the new seasonal bouquets when one of the regulars stood in front of him. He watched her lean on her hand with a cheeky smile, waving his hand to the back. “My coworker is right over there. He can tell you about our new recommendations,” he spoke and held the flowers up. “I’m busy.”
“And what if I want to hear it from you?”
“Then you’re clearly trying to make me feel better.”
She nudged him. “Come on, Droopy. What’s going on with you?”
Seungkwan shook his head with a small smile. “Nothing, just doing long days now business is booming.”
The regular and friend narrowed her eyes, but left it at that. She nodded and pointed to the back of the shop. “I’ll leave you to it then. Your colleague can help me as well.”
He nodded and turned back to the flowers, neatly spread out over the counter. He stuck two sunflowers in the middle, grabbing a bush of thistle and tucking it in gently. With a lily and some dahlias, he finished it off and put it to the side. With another handful of sunflowers, he made one with a variety of yellow flowers with green branches in between.
Sunflowers were the highlight of the summer, resembling them in a way that no other flower could. Happiness, loyalty, adoration and hope, a symbol of optimism that dragged him through the slums of the day.
His coworker slid past Seungkwan and did the checkout with his friend. He cut the branches a little shorter and smiled at her.
As she walked out, someone bumped into her on the way in. She made way for the new customer before flying out of the door, but Seungkwan’s attention was on the flowers again. He put them in a bucket and moved them to the shop window.
Pride rang in his chest when his bouquets were on display. He was at his best when he was assembling them, carefully curating where each flower would go.
Seungkwan heard his coworker sending someone over to him, but he perfected the display until it was showing its best side. When he turned around, someone grabbed his arm for stability.
“Sorry,” a warm voice said to him, chuckling softly. “I didn’t realise you were going to turn around so soon.”
His heart stopped. His eyes darted everywhere but at the person in front of him. His thoughts were racing a million miles per hour and he was unable to make sense of anything. He thought he was over it, he really was.
You smiled at him when finally looked at you. Until it faded a little he was happy that you did, but a pit formed in his stomach when you observed him closely.
Seungkwan felt his face flush– no. His entire body flushed. He rolled his shoulders back and cleared his throat.
“Seungkwan,” you said gently, the hint of surprise in your voice made his heart drop. You looked around and chuckled. “Well, it makes sense that you’re here.”
He chuckled nervously and crossed his arms behind his back. “I… Well, here I am.”
You smiled, your entire face lighting up when you did. Your cheeks glowed, your eyes twinkled the same after a decade, scanning every inch of his face.
He could barely stand on his own two feet anymore.
You shook your head. “Sorry, um,” with rosy cheeks, you smiled. “I actually came here for a bouquet. Your colleague said you could help me with that.”
Seungkwan looked over at Chan sticking his thumb up. He pressed his lips into a thin smile before turning to you. “Yes, I can. Do you have something in mind?”
“My manager is going through a tough time,” you said with a small smile. “I know she loves flowers, so I want to give her a nice bouquet to let her know I’m there for her.”
Seungkwan’s stomach tingled, a smile tugging at his lips. “That’s very thoughtful of you, actually. I’m sure she’ll appreciate it.”
You wrote it off as basic human decency, for Seungkwan it was his reminder why he was in love with you once.
He motioned for you to follow him and took you to the back of the shop. “I have some bouquets ready to go, but you can also assemble one yourself if you want to add your personal touch,” he explained and turned to you.
You glanced at your watch and offered an apologetic smile. “I don’t have long, so one of yours has to do this time.”
This time. Seungkwan’s mind started racing with possibilities again.
He stepped aside. “I’m sure there’s something that catches your eye, but I have special bouquets for your situation if you’d like me to point them out.”
You watched them curiously. “You do?”
Seungkwan couldn’t help but smile and nodded. He pointed at the white and green bouquet. “All of these flowers represent support, strength or resilience, like the white chrysanthemum for example, and the green rose.”
When he locked eyes with you, his cheeks flushed. “Um… but you can also go for something more cheerful? Yellow flowers, or her favourite colour perhaps?”
Your lips twisted into a smile. “The white bouquet is beautiful, Seungkwan. I’ll take that.”
He nodded and took it from the bucket, taking you back to the counter. “Would you like a card with it?”
You rummaged in your bag and held one up.
“Thought of everything, huh?”
“Ah, well.” Your cheeks tinted a light pink and put it back.
Seungkwan smiled and wrapped the bouquet in foil before placing it on the counter, putting the order in the register. “Would you like to grab a cup of coffee soon?” He heard himself ask. His fingers hovered above the buttons as his eyes darted your way. “I… Mean… We haven’t seen each other in so long so I thought, maybe we can catch up?”
“I would like that,” you answered with a smile and pointed across the street. “That place looks nice. We can meet there around this time next week?” You proposed and held your card against the reader. “I wish I had a gap this week, but I’m packed–”
“Next week is perfect,” he assured you and handed you the bouquet along with the receipt. “I’ll make sure to be there.”
You took it and thanked him.
“You can tell me how much she liked it,” he added with a wink, to which you chuckled.
“Just tell me if you want me to feed your ego.”
“I’ll never say no to that.”
You smiled and waved. “See you next week, Seungkwan.”
He watched you walk out of the shop and his entire body felt like it was on fire. He smiled to himself and fell back into his usual rhythm.
The rest of the week flew by in a blink of an eye. As quickly as Seungkwan opened the shop in the morning, he could close it when the afternoon was almost over. He wasn't looking forward to the moment he would be able to go home. In fact, for the first time in months he was sad to leave the place behind for the night.
Seungkwan kept an eye on the coffeehouse across the street, leaning against the counter. He fixed a loose hair in the shop window, but his eyes darted back quickly. He clutched his shirt, heart galloping in his chest as the time crept closer to 10am.
“You know,” Chan started, “when you asked me to cover for you, you could’ve stayed home.”
“I’m across the street,” Seungkwan answered with a shrug. “Just dropped in to see how you were doing.”
“You’re way too concerned over a business that is doing well.”
When the clock struck ten, he pushed himself up. He tapped the counter and nodded at Chan. “Call me if something comes up.”
“I hope I won’t have to,” Chan replied with a grin. “I would hate to interrupt your date.”
Seungkwan rolled his eyes, but his cheeks flushed. He walked out of the door and crossed the street. He looked around for a sign of you before he went inside. The smell of coffee and pastries greeted him at the first step. He waved at the barista and walked towards the back.
He halted in his tracks and when you locked eyes, the world stopped spinning.
You were on the couch, two coffees in front of you. Your smile lit up the room, your eyes twinkling.
He swallowed and walked over to you.
You held a cup up. “Iced Americano?”
Seungkwan thought of all the times people told him that he was too clingy, that you would get tired of him being around you all the time, but how could he not when this was how you waited for him?
He took it with a bright smile. “How did you…”
“I hoped I was still right,” you answered and pulled your cup towards you quickly. A grin formed on your face. “Guess what I have, though.”
“Let me think.” He sat down with a hum. “Is it… a cappuccino with oat milk and an extra shot of espresso?”
You lit up and Seungkwan became a puddle at your feet, even though your feelings had long withered away.
“Are you back in town?” He asked and stirred his americano with the straw.
“Since a month,” you answered with a hum. “I got an incredible job offer that I simply couldn’t refuse.”
He looked up at you, a grin tugging at his lips. “‘If you ever catch me returning to this shithole...’”
“Yeah, yeah,” you rolled your eyes with a chuckle, “very hypocritical, I know.” With your hands wrapped around the cup, you leaned back in your seat. You looked out of the window. “It has changed a lot since the last time I was here. I didn’t know it was capable of change.”
“Yeah, well, when a lot of citizens and small business owners leave because you’re putting them at a disadvantage, you have to do something.” He tapped the table with his index finger. “Before this coffee house, there were at least four different stores. We’ve seen them all wither from the other side of the street.”
You hid your smile behind the cup. “Means that your business is doing well at least.”
“I guess it does, yeah.” Seungkwan put his cup down. “What did your manager think of the flowers?”
You put the cup down in a hurry and slapped your hands on the table. “That’s what I needed to remember!”
He tilted his head with a hum. His eyes remained strictly on yours, before he would lose himself in you.
“She loved them!” You exclaimed excitedly. “She asked me where I got them from so I explained, but she’s on the other side of town so she’d never heard of it and I lost your business card.”
Seungkwan’s lips twisted into a smile. “I can give you one later? Is that what you wanted to ask?”
“Yes!” You rubbed his hand and took a sip. “You’re a doll.”
His hand tingled. A buzz shot through his body and his cheeks flushed. “It’s no problem, really,” he managed to tell you. “I mean, we have plenty so it’s not like I’ll miss one.”
You looked at each other for a second before you broke into a grin.
Seungkwan looked away and cleared his throat. “Anyway.”
“Hey.”
He looked your way again, watching your eyes soften.
“It’s good to see you again, Seungkwan.”
Seungkwan nodded and scratched his neck. “Of the same.”
You ordered another round and shared a slice of red velvet cake before you had to part ways. Seungkwan had his entire schedule cleared, even though deep down he knew it wasn’t necessary.
“I have to pick up an order for mum, then I’m meeting with my old friends for lunch, I’m squeezing a workout in there and tonight, I finally have a night to myself,” you told him as you were crossing the street. “Any fun plans on your end?”
“Hoping my colleagues didn’t burn the shop down.”
You pushed him playfully. “Don’t be mean. I’m sure they’re taking good care of it in your absence.”
He didn’t have the heart to tell you that he was barely absent.
Seungkwan pushed through the door and let you pass. He walked up to the counter for a business card, ignoring the look he got from Chan.
Him altogether, actually.
He joined you back at the front of the shop and gave you the card. Watching you observe the flowers made a warmth spread through his chest.
You looked up at him. “These carnations are adorable.” You hovered over them and inhaled. “And they smell amazing.”
Seungkwan nudged you. “You know your flowers.”
“I learned from the best.” You came up. “Can I take some for my mum? She will love the pink ones.”
He reached for the bucket and grabbed some. “I think they will pair well with white.”
“Perfect!”
Seungkwan smiled and grabbed some baby’s breaths and kamini’s to fill the bouquet up, slipping behind the counter to assemble the bouquet.
“He has trouble not working when he asks for a day off,” he heard Chan telling you, followed by your chuckles.
His heart skipped a beat.
“Always had that,” you responded.
“Do you know each other?”
“We dated until I moved away for college,” you said to Chan.
Seungkwan’s cheeks were a furious shade of red, feeling his coworker’s eyes on him. He crouched to grab a piece of paper and wrapped the flowers together.
“For how long?”
“Four years.”
Chan’s eyes burned into him by that point.
Seungkwan gave the bouquet to you. “I’ll take care of it.” You opened your mouth, but he spoke ahead of you. “As long as you tell your mum hi from me, I’m satisfied.”
You took it from him with pink cheeks. “Thank you, Seungkwan. She’ll be very happy to hear from you again.”
He watched you leave, a smile carved into his face that wouldn’t go away for the rest of the day.
Even though he had no way of contacting you.
Seungkwan was a wreck when he found that out. If fate was a thing, you’d walked back into his life five years ago. He’d never stopped to think about which phone numbers got lost when he got a new number, if they even got lost at all.
He never realised that you couldn’t even reach him even if you wanted to, taking it as a sign from the universe to get over himself.
He’d gotten the chance to love you once. His karma had to be incredible for him to be able to love you a second time.
Seungkwan was in the warehouse, spitting through inventory and noting down everything he had to order. He threw out flowers that were withering, putting buckets aside that he would take back to the front when he was done.
His rhythm was back to its dull, unadventurous way.
With a pen tucked behind his ear, he reorganised the storage. Thoughtless, for once, only worried about efficiency and structure.
He grabbed some of the buckets and dragged them back into the shop, putting them by his feet and observing them closely. His heart skipped a beat when he saw white carnations again, but he pushed the thought away.
When he was at the back for the remaining bucket, Chan called out to him.
Seungkwan walked back and shot him a look.
You shot him an apologetic smile. “I’m so sorry to bother you at work.”
He quickly shook his head and smiled at you. “What’s up?”
“I don’t have your number.”
His breath caught in his throat, his heart jumping in his chest. Seungkwan scrambled to get his phone out of his pocket and gave it to you. He cleared his throat and rubbed his hands off on his pants. “So, how did your mother like the bouquet?”
A smile played on your lips. “As predicted, she loved it. She started bombarding me with questions about you which I could not answer.”
"We have to text a lot, then."
"We'll be caught up in no time." You gave his phone back and pointed to the door. "I need to head to my friend's. Thank you for making time for me."
Seungkwan smiled. "Always."
You waved and walked out of the door.
After taking a week off — his colleagues begged him to before he collapsed — Seungkwan was back at the shop before the weekend would ring in. He was at the back while Chan stayed out front, taking care of the deliveries that had just been made and storing them properly. He took some of the buckets to the front with him to make bouquets, placing them in the shop window for display.
As he was working on a sunflower bouquet, the shop door opened.
Seungkwan looked up an his heart skipped a beat. "Hey."
"Hey there, holidaymaker!" You waved excitedly and walked up to the counter. "Happy to be back here?"
"Back where I belong," he answered with a smile. "What can I do for you?"
"My colleague's retiring." You placed a hand on your chest with twinkling eyes. "I was put in charge of getting a present and I wanted to do a bouquet on the side."
Seungkwan nodded and put the bouquet to the side. "Anything particular in mind?"
"She loves the colour yellow?"
He smiled and moved away from the counter, motioning his head at you. As you followed him to the left side of the shop, he spoke. "Yellow is a very common colour these months, so you're in luck."
"It's a very positive colour."
He agreed and pointed at the buckets. "You can do a sunflower bouquet, or you get a mix of yellow and orange flowers to give her. It's whatever she prefers, and what catches your eye the most, of course."
You bobbed along. "Can you tell me about the yellow flowers?"
Seungkwan felt the heat flushing his cheeks. "Yeah, of course." He cleared his throat and grabbed one out of the bucket. "I put a sunflower in the middle here as a focal point. It expresses admiration, loyalty and a non-romantic love."
He pointed at the flower next to it. "I put some marigold in it to represent happiness, some orchids for well wishes and orange roses to break up the yellow. They stand for enthusiasm and energy, in this case."
As he grabbed the other bouquet, he locked eyes with you. His stomach tingled when you smiled.
"I also made one with a yellow dahlia as focal point, but they more so represent a commitment shared forever in this case, as well as the pansies and the yarrow. It's rather a love bouquet, to keep it short."
You pointed at the one in the bucket. "That one fits the occasion more, I'd say."
Seungkwan agreed with a chuckle and grabbed it, walking back to the counter.
"God, it's gorgeous," you breathed out as you followed him. "I almost want to keep it myself."
"I'll take that as a compliment."
"You definitely should." You held the card against the reader. "Seungkwan, you're a doll. Thank you so much!"
Seungkwan watched you leave with flaming hot cheeks.
Later that week, he got a text from you telling him how much she loved the bouquet. You even forwarded the picture of your colleague, where the bouquet was standing on the saloon table in the living room.
He felt himself slipping away the more he talked to you.
Seungkwan came back from his lunch break, a cup of coffee in hand when he halted in his tracks.
You stood at the counter with a smile, declaring that your friend was getting married and you wanted to congratulate her with a bouquet. Once again, Seungkwan spent his time talking to you about the bouquets he made until you settled for a white one, keeping it simple but thoughtful.
The smile you left with was the same.
Chan watched the interaction and flashed him a grin. "She's becoming our biggest source of income this way."
After the weekend, you stood in front of his nose again. For the first time, you were there for yourself, opting that you needed a nice bouquet in your living room.
Seungkwan didn't mind having you wander around the store for thirty minutes if that made you happy with the bouquet you made. He told you he would take care of it for you and your smile had lit the room up.
That same night you video called him, showing the bouquet standing in your living room. Seungkwan only hung up when you declared you needed to go to bed. If he didn't, you would've stayed up until the middle of the night to talk to him.
Every day that passed since then, Seungkwan hoped that you would walk through the doors.
After two weeks of absence, you were there again. Your mother's friend wanted a bouquet with pink and white carnations just like the one you gave to your mother.
Seungkwan happily obliged and yet again, you were the happiest woman on earth when you left the store. He watched with the heat spreading through his body, smiling to himself before he went back to work.
"That's the fourth time this month alone," Chan commented and turned to his colleague. "And coincidentally, she comes in when you're at work."
Seungkwan arched an eyebrow. "Meaning?"
"That — for some bizarre reason — she keeps seeking you out." When he stayed silent, Chan deadpanned him. "Oh, come on. You can't tell me that you hadn't noticed."
He shrugged and wrapped the small rose bouquet together.
"I can say with absolute certainty that even Minghao has noticed."
"What have I noticed?"
Seungkwan's head shot up.
Minghao halted in his tracks, a flannel shirt loosely hugging his slender body and blond hair partially hidden under a cap. His sharp eyes peeked at him curiously.
"Seungkwan has a not-so secret admirer," Chan said without missing a beat. "His ex-girlfriend has been coming in here constantly." He held four fingers up. "Four times this month."
"In my defence, we split up on good terms," Seungkwan cut in. "Ten years ago."
Minghao bobbed his head. "So Seungkwan likes her back, I assume."
Chan turned to him and smiled sweetly, but he just scoffed and put the bouquet in the display.
"That's a yes."
"Chan is convinced she's here for me, but I think she just wants to be sweet to the people around her." Seungkwan shrugged. "That's how she's always been. She's caring, loves seeing people happy. It's not uncharacteristic for her to stop by so often."
"Like the talking isn't uncharacteristic either, just like with you."
He glared at his colleague.
"So just return the favour and give her a bouquet."
Seungkwan's eyes darted to Minghao.
"You seem to know what she likes, you like her. I don't see why not." He grabbed his package from the counter and smiled. "From what I hear, she seems to be seeking you out on purpose. You'll miss out if you don't."
Seungkwan was the only one left in the shop later that week, still pondering over what his friends had said about you. He hated that he was convinced of their case, how it made his heart beat faster. He wanted to find out, to see how you felt about him. He needed to know how much was still left of what you once had.
When he looked at the clock, it was a little over 4pm. He still had two hours to kill until the shop would close, it was as good as cleaned and there hadn't been a customer in over an hour.
Seungkwan decided to put the order in early and grabbed his laptop from out back, setting it on the counter. As he was selecting the flowers, the door opened. He looked up and smiled. "Good afternoon."
You turned around and waved at him. "Hi, Seungkwan!"
He stumbled over his words before he was able to get something out, making you chuckle. God, that was the best sound in the world.
"I'm here for a bulk order, actually," you said and leaned your elbows on the counter. "Is that possible?"
Seungkwan bobbed his head and put the order through before shoving his laptop aside. "It's a minimum delivery time of two weeks, though, depending on our inventory."
"It's in a month so we have time!"
He heard his friends in the back of his mind, his heart pulsing in his ears and for some reason, his ability to think before he spoke magically left him.
He flashed you a grin. "You know, you can just say you want to see me."
"Yeah, actually. For the bulk order."
Seungkwan cleared his throat and shifted his weight to his other leg. "Right, so. We can deliver roses, or multi flower bouquets…"
You nodded. "Well, um, it's a business event so something professional, but fun."
"White, pink and orange?"
"Yep, perfect."
Seungkwan scribbled it down. His eyes darted up at you, but you looked away. "Any preference for flowers?"
"Nope. Go crazy."
He wrote your name above the notes and came up. "I suspect a normal delivery period, but we'll notify you if something comes up."
"Could you send them over to the venue actually?" You asked. "The day before would be perfect."
Seungkwan nodded and wrote it down. "We'll keep in touch."
Your fingers drummed on the counter before you stepped away. You took small, slow steps towards the exit, looking around as if you hadn't seen the store a thousand times before.
He called out to you.
You looked over your shoulder, your hand on the door handle.
"You don't have to keep coming here if you want to see me," he said.
Your cheeks flushed a rose pink. "I like to see you at your best." With those words, you left the shop. You locked eyes through the window one more time and you smiled at him shyly before you disappeared into the crowd.
Seungkwan was reminded of everything that he loved about you.
He was on edge, even more so than before. He was in the shop more than he was scheduled for, all to try and put his mind to anything else before he was consumed by you. His coworkers looked at him funny and he was sure they whispered behind his back, but he could not bring himself to care.
Seungkwan told Chan he would be in to make the new bouquets on his day off and did just that. If Chan refrained from speaking his mind or he sensed that Seungkwan really needed the distraction, he didn't know. Once again, he couldn't bring himself to care.
As he was assembling a rose bouquet, the door of the shop opened.
Seungkwan looked up, watching how Minghao strolled up to the counter. "I was wondering if my favourite regular was ever going to come back," he teased.
Minghao chuckled, sliding his hands into his pocket. "Duty never stops calling. I'm here for a bouquet, like usual."
"I've just been making them." He held a rose bouquet up.
"I don't have to look any further, then."
"Makes my job easy." Seungkwan grinned and wrapped it in foil for him. "Any special occasion?"
"Not really." Minghao hummed and got his card out, holding it against the reader. "Just an 'I love you.' She deserves it every day, but otherwise her apartment would be filled with flowers and she'll go back to hating them."
His grin was replaced by a warm smile. "I'm very sure that she'll love it." He gave his friend the flowers. "Tell her I said hi."
"I will." Minghao saluted him and turned on his heel. He looked over his shoulder and smiled before walking out of the store.
Seungkwan looked down at the flowers. When the bouquet was laying in front of him, he swiped his own card against the reader and put it in the back.
The thought of your smile was enough to make the heat pool in his stomach before it spread through the rest of his body.
He was about to get himself into dangerous waters.
That night, Seungkwan sat in the car in front of your apartment block, hands clutching the wheel. He told himself that there was no reason to be nervous. In fact, this was by far not the first time he'd stood on your doorstep unannounced, but after all those years…
He shook his head, took a deep breath and got out of the car. He grabbed the bouquet from the backseat and shut the car, walking up to the door. His finger trembled when he rang your bell, and his breath hitched when there was crackling on the other side of the line.
"Hello!"
Your excitement etched a smile into his face. He leaned forward into the microphone. "It's me."
"Seungkwan! What are you doing here?"
"Do I need a reason for a visit?"
Your chuckles made the heat pool in his stomach. "I'll open the door for you."
The door buzzed and Seungkwan pushed it open, walking straight into the elevator. As it brought him to the fourth floor, he fixed the collar of his blouse and ran a hand through his hair.
Seungkwan stepped into the hallway and turned to the left, knocking on the apartment at the end of the hall. His heart ached for you, reigniting a spark that he thought had long died out. That he thought he'd left behind when you broke up.
When you appeared in the doorway, he proved himself wrong.
"You'll never guess what I brought you," he spoke, to which you pretended to think.
"I would say flowers," you finally said and leaned against the frame. "Couldn't be too sure."
Seungkwan smiled and held the bouquet out.
You observed it as you took it from him. You lit up, making his stomach tingle. "My favourite flowers! How did you know?!"
"I just hoped nothing had changed."
Your arms flew around his neck, your face nuzzling in the crook.
Seungkwan clung onto your waist for stability. He closed his eyes and hummed softly. "Sorry for barging in unannounced. I just… I don't know. I had to see you."
"Apology rejected."
He chuckled softly and pulled back when you did, observing every inch of your face. When a lock blocked your eyes, he tucked it behind your ear.
Your cheeks flushed, a bright smile tugging at your lips. You leaned in, pushing yourself up on your tippy toes.
Seungkwan met you halfway in a kiss that sealed him forever. Every memory you made flashed before his eyes. It all seemed so innocent at the time, his sisters had even told him that first loves would never last. Theirs hadn't, why would his?
And for years, he believed them. When you left for college and the distance would be unbearable for the both of you, Seungkwan had told himself that it would blow over. You would find someone new, and he would, too.
But after ten years, on that faithful day that you walked through the doors of his shop, he realised that his heart still beat for you. And it never stopped doing that for you.
When you pulled back, his eyes stayed shut.
"I'm free tonight," you whispered.
Seungkwan smiled as they fluttered open. "We should get dinner, then."
Your head shot up and Seungkwan regretted opening his mouth. You observed him closely, narrowing your eyes. They disappeared under a bright grin. “Boo Seungkwan, are you asking me out?”
“Would you say yes if I did?”
There was a challenging look in your eyes that made his heart beat faster. You could feel it if you moved your hands closer. “Shall we try?”
He locked eyes with you and leaned forward. “Would you like to go on a date with me?”
"Lead the way."
Seungkwan took you to an Italian restaurant just out of town. He discovered it on his way home, when he needed to take a detour. Overridden by hunger, he went in. Since then, he never went to another Italian restaurant again.
It was cozy, almost like you went into the owners' home. A couple of people were seated here and there, the smell of fresh pasta and garlic dancing all around you.
You looked around you and muttered underneath your breath. "This is adorable!" You told Seungkwan. "And it smells nice."
Seungkwan smiled and placed a hand on your back. "Come on, let's search for a table." He looked down and cleared his throat. He retreated his hand and folded it behind his back.
Your cheeks tinted a light pink and you looked away from him.
He mentally cussed himself out. At least he was making his intentions clear if he let his hand sit there, but the last thing he wanted was to make you uncomfortable. Maybe you were just there to see what there was to rekindle between you.
Seungkwan watched you plop on the couch and smiled, sitting across from you on a chair. "How about we order a bottle of red wine to share between us?"
"I do love a good red wine," you answered and rubbed your chin. "Do they have Primitivo here?"
"The best I've ever had."
You nodded with a smile. "Perfect. We'll get that then."
He gave you the menu that sat on the table and leaned back in his seat. His heart warmed when he saw you mouthing along the words, your brows knitted together. Every once in a while, you bobbed your head. You hadn't even properly registered that Seungkwan ordered a bottle of wine until you had a glass in front of your nose.
Your head shot up and you shot him a small smile. "I was so engulfed in the menu. Thank you for ordering."
"I always eat the same thing here so I don't even have to look."
"I expected as much."
Seungkwan cocked an eyebrow, but you just shrugged. He leaned forward. "Are you saying I don't try new things?"
"Considering your days are always the same." Your eyes flicked up. A smile played on your lips and you slapped his hand lightly. "It's not a bad thing, Seungkwan. Not everyone needs to have an adventurous life."
He stayed silent.
"Maybe that's their way of saying they don't have the right people around them," you said and leaned back with your glass of wine. "Maybe the reason people are chasing the limits is because they're scared to settle down and have enough with the ones closest to them. You never know."
"I didn't know college had made you so wise."
You hid your smile behind the wine, but he saw the corners of your mouth peeking out through the glass.
Seungkwan leaned on his hand and looked at you. "I'm happy to have you back in my non-adventurous, boring life."
"And this time I won't leave." You held your pinky out.
He laced it together with his and pressed a kiss to it.
You were right; he didn't have to lead a thrilling life to be happy, or to make you happy for that matter. In all truth, he was content with where he was. The flower shop was running well and you were back in his life.
Back in his arms.
Seungkwan couldn't remember the last time he looked forward to doing inventory, cleaning the storage or having to order new flowers. His day-to-day tasks became an adventure in itself.
With your bi-weekly visits to the shop, his colleagues were jokingly calling you the mother of the shop. You embraced your new title with open arms, even helping out whenever you had the time.
You were helping to close the shop, dragging the buckets to the back and wiping the floors clean.
Seungkwan couldn't help but admire you as he was finalising his order. When you looked his way, a pool of heat formed in his stomach before spreading through his entire body.
You skipped over to him and pressed a kiss to his lips. "Ready when you are."
He wrapped an arm around you, locking you into his side. He listened as you talked about the event. He smiled when there was a skip in your step, excitement ringing in your voice.
And suddenly, when he looked around him, the world was a little brighter than it was before.
I hope you don't use ai because there's insert divider here on your writing
omg where? BYE okay let me explain this before people actually think im using AI because i do NOT use AI. i can ensure you that!
i use dividers to split up my scenes and i forget that's something i need to add to the tumblr like, 90% of the time. what happens is that i accidentally leave in 'insert divider here' instead of adding the divider and it looks so fucking stupid 😭 thank you so much for sending this ask though because this reminds me i need to back in and see where i need to change it. i literally cannot remember so i will check everything and make sure it's all in order (:
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❀ 𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: lots of angst, talks of heart break, mentions of getting divorced, don’t worry this has a hopeful ending.
❀ 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: unprotected p in v, creampie, cum play, oral (both rec), multiple positions, fingering, they’re both kinda desperate, lots of making out, it’s pretty vanilla Nicknames: baby, Goldie (hers)
❀ 𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠: 18+ nsfw
❀ 𝐚𝐧: this is for @svthub first blooms collab. Thank you @aeristudios and @supi-wupi for helping and beta reading for me again 💕 Divider by @/saradika-graphics.
When it comes to firsts, you and Joshua were each others first for practically everything. He was your first kiss, you shared your first time together, you awkwardly lost your virginities to each other. You were each others first loves and your first heartbreaks.
Seven months, and six days have passed since you walked out the door and never came back. In that time you haven't moved on, you haven't tried to date anyone one. In your heart and soul you're still married.
ITS NEVER OVER
Joshua doesn't think he's ever loved, or will love anyone like he loves you. Watching you walk out of your shared home after an argument, was the most heartbreaking moment of his life.
The first three months you were gone, Joshua texted or called you everyday trying to get you to come home. Slowly the communication started to fade, and now Joshua hasn't spoken to you in three months and twenty-two days.
Since you left Joshua had refused to acknowledge you're sperated. He still wears his wedding ring, and anytime a woman tries to flirt with him he always reminds them he's married.
He's not sure if he can save his marriage or if you'll ever comeback home. He holds out hope that one day you'll come back home.
-
It's another day Joshua is working at the flower shop you both own from open to close. He has Jeonghan helping out running out the small coffee shop that's attached to it.
Today isn't an easy day for Joshua by any means. Today should be your eighth anniversary.
He's spent today burying himself in work. Jeonghan is very aware of what today is. He offered to work open to close with his best friend so he can keep an eye on him.
Joshua is putting the finishing touches on a floral arrangement for a regular who always buys flower for his wife. He puts the arrangement in the cooler before fishing his phone out of his pocket.
Opening his text he goes to your pinned contact. He frows seeing his last message from you was three months ago.
Shua [10:32am] Happy Anniversary.
He stares at his phone knowing there probably won't be response. You’ve barely responded to the last few messages he's sent.
Around noon Jeonghan finally convinces him to at least take a short lunch with him. Joshua's finished up all the early pick up orders and Mina has no problem running the flower counter, and taking orders.
Sitting in the back office Joshua leans back in his chair rubbing his eyes. He hates everything about today.
Jeonghan doesn't like seeing his best friend so distraught. For the last few months he's contemplated begging you to come back to your clearly broken estranged husband. This is your first anniversary apart and he knows Joshua is barely hanging on by a thread.
Leaning forwards, Joshua finally takes a bite of his salad that Jeonghan had ordered him. He can feel his best friend's eyes burning into him, with each bite he takes.
"Why are you here today?" Jeonghan thought Joshua would spend the day at home moping around.
"Because if I spend the day trapped in the home I used to share with her, I might actually lose my mind."
"Shua, maybe it's time you ask for her to comeback or give you a divorce?"
Joshua let's out a heavy sigh leaning back again. "I don't want a divorce. I just want my wife back."
"I know you do. It's just— Shua I hate seeing you torn up like this."
"I know. I hate feeling this way. I just don't know what to do."
"You should go out with me and Seungcheol to the bar tonight."
"Is that a good idea?" Joshua sighs.
"Yeah. I'm not asking you to get drunk, but just come out tonight. I don't want you sitting at home moping around."
Joshua's phone vibrates on the table. He picks it up and sees a message from you.
Goldie 12:13pm - Happy Anniversary.
He truly thought he wouldn't hear from you at all today. He doesn't expect you to call or anything, but he's glad you at least sent him a text.
"Whose texting you?"
Joshua sits the phone down on the table. "Goldie."
"You still call your wife her nickname?" For as long as Jeonghan has know Joshua, he's rarely ever heard him call you by your actual name.
"She's bright like a marigold."
"Your favorite flowers are white roses, I'm still shocked you don't call her Rosie."
Joshua grabs his phone and opens his text.
Shua 12:21pm: I miss you.
"Shua, just go to the bar tonight with me and Cheol."
He just stares at his text you. He can't bring himself to sit in the homes shared, during this anniversary you'll be apart.
"I'll go out tonight."
IS THIS AN ILLUSION?
The sight of you standing right outside the entrance of the flower shop doesn't feel real. Joshua rubs his eyes unsure if this is actually real. It's taking everything in him not to rush the few feet towards you. The closer he gets he realizes you're eyes are glossy and that have been crying.
"Goldie?"
You look up at him and give him a sad smile. "Hi, Shua."
He stood in front of you. He just takes a moment to fully look at you. He was starting to think he might not ever see you again.
"Why are you here?" He stops in front of you.
"I realize I'm miserable without you. I thought I needed to try and be independent, but I understand that's foolish."
Joshua glances around the quiet street. The is watercolors of pink and orange as it starts to rise. He doesn't want to have this conversation out on the street.
"Let's go inside and talk over some coffee." He fishes his key out of his pocket. Opening the door, he holds it open for you.
You look around the flower shop and smile at the site of the bundles of marigolds and white roses together.
"The marigolds are always there because of you." Back in the high school Joshua gave you a bouquet of marigolds and told you they remind him of you. He's called you Goldie since you were teens because of the vibrant flower.
"Are the white rose for you?" You pick a single stem white rose up.
"They're still my favorite flower." He says. “You know they represent new beginnings?”
“Yeah. You gave them to me after our first fight in high school.” You hope that the white rose can represent your future now.
He walks over to the small coffee shop. He turns on the espresso machine and gets to work making coffee for both of you.
This flower shop and cafe is something the two of you built together. This place was just as much yours as it was his before you left.
He tries to focus on making coffee, but he can only focus on you. He's watching you make your way around the flower shop, looking at all the flowers.
He brings over a small tray holding both your iced lattes. Walking over you sit down across to him at small table near the window.
You take a sip of the honey flavored latte. He made it exactly how you have always loved it. "I know I have messed up, am I hurt you."
"You were my first love, and you became my first heartbreak." He responds.
"I know. I broke both of our hearts." You'll never point any of the blame on your husband. Joshua has always been perfect to you. "I left because I never knew what it was like to be independent. I went from living under the guidance of my father, to being married. I've always had a man in my life helping me figure out how to live. I needed to try and be independent."
His brows knit together. "Did you think I was controlling?"
"No, not at all. I just needed space to try an discover who I am. I realized the whole time I was away that my life doesn't make sense without you."
Reaching for the glass you take another drink of your coffee. "I'm coming home. If you would like to continue our relationship, I would love that. I understand if you don't want to. I hurt you, and know that. I can stay with Seokmin and rent a room from him."
"You're crazy if you think I'm going to let you live with Seokmin. Since the moment you walked out of our home on that raining day, I have hoped and prayed that I would come home to me."
"Don't you hate me for hurting you?"
He reaches out taking your hand in his. "Goldie, I don't think I will fully ever understand why you left like you did. I always thought you knew you could talk to me and trust me. But I could never hate you. I just hated that you made me feel like I was just an afterthought." It's true, he's been heart broken since you left, but he's never hated you.
"Okay." Tears slowly start sliding down your cheeks. "I'm sorry I made you feel that way."
Reaching across the table he rest his hand on your cheek. He drags his hand across the delicate skin of your cheek, swiping away your tears. "Come home tonight. Let's have dinner and you can stay the night or you can go stay with Seokmin. The guest room is still set up."
"I would like that."
He wants to ask you a million questions. He wants to know what you've been up to, and where you have been living. He's pretty sure when you left you went and stayed with Seungkwan and his wife.
You both finish your lattes. Joshua is lucky you decided to show up after closing. He knows Jeonghan is going to show up soon to drag him to the bar.
"Did you want pasta tonight for dinner?" It's your anniversary and he would like to make your favorite meal.
"That would be nice."
He glances up when he sees Jeonghan unlocking the door and walking in. He didn't know if Jeonghan was coming in or going to call him. As a partial owner of the coffee shop in here, Jeonghan tends to come and go as he pleases here.
"Oh." Jeonghan says at the sight of you sitting with Joshua.
You turn and fully look at your husbands best friend. Joshua isn't aware that Jeonghan has been checking on you once a month since you left.
"Hi, Hannie."
Jeonghan shoves his hands into his jeans pockets. He looks at Joshua raising his brows. He's not fully sure what he just walked into to.
"Jeonghan, um Goldie is back." Joshua stands up.
"Welcome back, Goldie." Jeonghan tilts his head at you.
Jeonghan walks over and hands Joshua a bag. Joshua dismisses him and takes it to the back office. You're left alone with Jeonghan for a moment.
"When I asked you to come back last night. I didn't expect to see you at seven tonight." Jeonghan sits down where Joshua was sitting.
"I knew it was time to come home, your message was the push I needed." You pause staring at the man who had become your best friend as well. "I know you probably hate me, and we probably aren't friends anymore."
He knits his brows together. "I don't hate you, and we can still be friends. I'm just asking that you don't break his heart again."
Joshua walks back out holding the keys to the store. He gives you a gentle smile, before looking towards Jeonghan.
"I'll let Cheol know you can't come out tonight." Jeonghan stands up and grabs your empty coffee cups.
Joshua walks closer to you. Jeonghan walks away disposing of the cups.
"Are you ready to go home?" Joshua asks.
You stand up, glancing over you see Joshua holding out his hand. You don't even hesitate, you reach out lacing your fingers with his.
Walk out of the shop, Jeonghan leads the way. Joshua releases your hand just long enough to lock the door.
Jeonghan says goodbye and heads down the street towards the bar.
ALL THE MEMORIES WE’VE SHARED
Once you're both alone Joshua leads you towards his car. He unlocks it's and opens the passenger door for you.
"I didn't ask how you got here." Joshua pauses.
"Seokmin dropped me off."
You both get into the car. Joshua glances over and gives you a smile before he turns the car on. The drive the flower shop, to your home takes all of five minutes. Joshua parks the car in the driveway and you both get out.
Heading inside your shared home, it still looks like just the day you left. Over by the couch, your engagement and wedding photos are still hung. After you left your thought he would remove those photos.
You follow him as he heads off to the kitchen. He grabs a bottle of wine and pops it open. You stand by the sink watching as he moves around the kitchen. He pours to glasses of red wine. He grabs one, holding it out for you.
Taking the glass you hold it out. He grabs his own and raises it. "Happy anniversary."
You cheers your glasses before taking a sip of rich yet subtle flavor of blackberries in the wine.
"Happy anniversary," you respond.
"Take a seat and I'll make us your favorite pesto."
Walking over you sit down at the kitchen table. You sip on the rich wine, watching him move with ease around the kitchen. Cooking for you has always been apart of Joshua's love language with you.
It takes about thirty minutes before he sets down a delicious looking plate of pesto pasta.
He sits down across from you. There is about two minutes of silence before you both start making small talk.
"Do you remember when we're were home from college celebrating our anniversary and your mom almost walked in on us?" Joshua asks. You remember this night fully. You were both twenty and had been dating for four years at that point. You planned on getting a hotel for your anniversary, but weren't able to. Joshua thought it would be romantic if he snuck into your parents house in the middle of night. It turns out your were being too loud having sex and your mom was concerned you were hurt and came knocking on your luckily locked door.
"Yes. We were being so loud, my mom thought something hurt me and made me cry." If only she knew, your charming boyfriend was fucking you so good you couldn't shut up.
Through out dinner you keep talking about past memories. After another glass of wine you both work on cleaning up the kitchen. Joshua puts the last dish away as you finish your last drink of wine.
Joshua is standing there looking absolutely handsome. This dinner made you feel like everything was back to normal. It's making you realize you didn't destroy everything you built together, like you thought you did.
You've missed your husband desperately, and you never want to leave his side again.
Joshua walks closer to you. He stops right in front of you. He reaches out pushing your hair out of you face. He doesn't anything, he just stares at you for a moment.
Without thinking, you lean in crashing your lips into his. His hand grips your hip, pulling you flush against his body. Wrapping your arms around his neck, you deepen the kiss. The whole time you were gone, you craved this feeling. You told yourself over and over again, that you left to find yourself, but you couldn't push away the aching feeling in your chest. Every single day, you're apart you've missed your husband. Now that you're back you don't ever want to leave his side again.
Pulling back slightly, he rests his nose against yours. "Are you sure you want this?" He whispers.
"I just want to be with my husband again." His brows knit together for a moment. "Joshua, if you'll have me back, I wanna be yours."
Not another word was uttered before he crashes his lips into yours for a searing kiss. He walks you backwards until your back hits the wall with a thud.
He pulls away smiling. His smile sends a fluttering storm of butterflies into your stomach. "Baby, you've alway been mine. Even when you made me feel like an afterthought. You were always mine." He says before kissing you again.
Reaching for his belt, without thinking you start unbuckling it. He stares at you with a look of awe. You fumble, as your work on unbuckling his pants. You push his jeans down below his butt, and pull out his already hardening length. Your eyes lock on his, as your slowly pump his length.
You give him a smile, before dropping to your knees in front of him. You start off by holding, his length while you slowly took his rosy colored tip. He threads his fingers through your hair, holding it away from your face. Hallowing your cheeks you take his length into your mouth. Bobbing your head you slide your tongue against the vein that runs along the underside of his cock.
Joshua's eyes are closed, and his lips are parted. It's taking everything in him not to guide your movements. He's just letting your set your own pace. God he's missed the feeling of your mouth.
"Goldie." He lets out a breathy moan.
Looking up through your lashes, your eyes lock with his. He looks beautiful as he's on the edge of falling apart.
One hand rest on his thigh, while the other reach down to play with his balls.
"Baby, I'm close." You love how desperate he sounds.
Hallowing your cheeks you take him into your throat. He shakes his head and pulls away from you.
Sitting back on your heels you look up at him, confused.
"Baby, our first time together in months I refuse to finish the first time in your mouth." He reaches down, helping you stand up.
He leans down pressing his lips to yours for a quick kiss. "Let's move to our bedroom."
Laying on top of the same comforter you spent hours shopping dragging Joshua around on a sunny June afternoon. Pushing yourself up on your elbows you watch as Joshua starts stripping away this clothes. He's still absolutely beautiful.
It's been so long since you've been intimate. Joshua is the only man you've ever been with, and you never want another man touch you like he does.
He sits his knee on the bed and starts crawling towards you. He sits on his heels between your spread legs. Leaning down he places a kiss on your knee.
"I'm going to eat you out." He lays down on his stomach, with your needy pussy right in front of his face. He starts by kissing the top of your mound. He spreads your lips and with his fat tongue he licks your puffy clit.
"Oh—" you instantly moan.
"You taste just as sweet as I remember."
He dives into your core like a man starved. He practically makes out with your clit, switching between licking and sucking as he pumps two fingers in and out of you.
Your fingers tangle in his hair, holding him close to your core. Without thinking your lift your hips pushing your pussy closer to his face.
"Shua—" You moan.
He curves his fingers up, touching that spot inside you, that leaves you seeing stars. He sucks harder on your clit. Your orgasm hits you like a lightening strike. Everything tenses and then your whole body instantly relaxs. Your walls flutter around his fingers. You're body lies limp against the soft bed.
He pulls back smiling. His lips have a shine to them from your release. His tongue slides across his top lip, collecting some of your release.
Your eyes are squeezed shut letting the high wash over you. Joshua takes this time to slowly pull back. He moves back to his position, sitting on his knees between your spread legs. He pumps his painfully hard length, looking down at you.
Your eyes open and you find him staring down at you. He presses another gentle kiss to your knee.
"Do I need to get a condom?" He hasn't worn in a condom with you since you were in college together, but it's been so long since you were intimate he doesn't know if you want him to wear one. His large hand rests on your thigh, and rubs it slowly.
A smile tugs at your lips. "I'm still on birth control, and haven't even looked at another man other than you."
"Goldie—" he pauses and looks at you with his brows knit. "Baby, I've never been with anyone other then you. The whole time you were gone I never planned on moving on. I'm faithful to you."
"I didn't wasn't accusing you of anything. I just wanted you to know I was faithful to you too." You give him a smile. "Joshua I want to feel you fully raw again."
He moves closer to you. He takes his hard length in his hand, running it through your wet folds. A soft gasp passes your lips as the rosy mushroom tip bumps against your sensitive clit. He moves so he's hovering over you, while he rest on his knees. He pushes you inch by inch as painfully slow pace. It's been so long since you've had sex with anything other than your vibrator. It's going to take a moment for you to adjust to the size of your husband. The moment he's fully inside he stills, giving you a moment to adjust. Closing your eyes you tilt your head back. He reaches up resting his hand on your cheek.
"You okay?" Your eyes flutter open, and find him staring down at you.
"Yeah, I just need a minute. It's a been a while."
"Baby it's been seven long months since I have been inside you." He gives you that smile that always makes you feel weak in the knees.
"Shua, can you move?" Your reach up, tangling your fingers in his hair.
Without saying another word, he starts moving at a slow and deep pace. His body is practically plastered against you. One of yours hands is tangled in his hand and the others rest on his lower back. You can't get enough of him. Seven long months left you yearning for him.
His large length is filling you completey. He's so long you feel as if he's kissing your cervix with each deep thrust. The room is filled with echoing sounds of your whimpers and moans, and his deep moans. Resting his face in the crook of your neck, he leaves a wet trail of kisses, most definitely leaving marks in his wake.
"Baby you feel so good," he groans against your skin.
Spreading your legs wider for him, he's able to hit spots even deeper. Closing your eyes you focus on your rapidly approaching high. You let out a high pitched moan that sounds like his name. You're on the verge of falling apart.
"You're clenching." He groans. He knows your body inside and out. He's aware that you're on the brink of falling apart.
"You feel so good. You're so big." You're practically squirming, trying to push your hips up towards him.
"Baby you can come." He pulls his lips away from your skin.
You silently nod your head. Your whole body feels tense. The coiling in your stomach has your wound so tight, you're on the brink of exploding.
Joshua pulls away from your fully. You whine at the loss of him plastered against you. He sits on his knees between your spread legs. This position gives him. The ability to play with your clit. He picks up his pace, still going deep, but smacking his hips into yours hard. His hand rest on your mound, his thumb works on rubbing your sensitive clit. Your lips part, as a silent gasp passes.
Pushing yourself up on your elbows your watch what he's doing. It's absolutely toxicity watching as he plays with you.
"Fuck—" you whine.
"Come for me baby."
Silently you nod.
He pushes his hips into yours at quicker pace. Your orgasm feels like a tidal wave. The coil snaps in your stomach like it never had before. Your walls squeeze his massive length pushing him over the edge right behind you. He fills you to the brim with his milky white release. He's cum harder then he ever has.
He keeps thrusting into you with shallow thrust, helping you both ride out your high. Pulling out he watches as his thick cum slowly starts to leak out. Without thinking he drags two fingers through your folds helping to push his release back inside you.
"God I love you." He says.
"I love you too."
He kisses the top of your knee one last time before running off to the bathroom to get a warm cloth to clean you up.
Laying in bed with your husband feels surreal. There were many nights after you left you thought you lost him forever.
Laying in your side you stare him. He's laying on his side staring back. His hand rest on the bed between you. You're both still fully naked.
"Baby, I want my wife back."
"Why are you so willing to forgive me?" You can't push away the guilty feeling that's eating away at you.
"Because I love you, and I'm willing to understand why you left me." His words make you feel like your chest is being squeezed. "We can go slow. We can act like we're dating again, we have a guest room. One of us can sleep in there."
"Slow would be nice. Maybe we don't always sleep in separate rooms."
He smiles. "I'll do whatever you want. I just want you back."
"I'm back." You can't help but cry.
He reaches out pushing away your tears. "Don't cry, baby."
"I'm just worried. People probably hate me for hurting you."
He shakes his head. "No one can hate you. Sure some people don't understand, but no one hates you. Baby what other people think doesn't matter. All that matters is, I want you back, and I love you."
"I love you too."
Joshua moves closer. He crashes his lips into yours before pulling you into his arms. You know you messed up, but Joshua loves you, and wants to work on building your life together again. You hope one day maybe that guilty feeling will go away. But right now all that matters is that you love your husband, and he loves you.
Omgggg I looove Don't forget you love me, I love the tension during the first half, I didn't know what to expect after oc and Mingyu hugged each other after the race and then they started being cold towards each other!!! I was ready to cry
And then, oc left!!! I get her, I'm not judging her decisions but it was sad that she couldn't be there anymore! I'm glad Mingyu gave her time to breathe and recover, but he really got my heart when he went to her house to talk to her!! He was a man on a mission!
I'm happy they're happy together 🤧🥹
bye this is so cute. thank you so much for taking some time out of your day to send me this super sweet ask??? hello??? im so happy HAHAHA.
mingyu was going THROUGH it but it was worth it <3 im so so SO happy you loved it and i hope to see you in my inbox more often 🫶
summary: With a bad start of the season, you and Mingyu try to save your relationship from falling apart.
wc: 6,059
rating: sfw
tags: non-idol au, f1 au, established relationship, tension, on the verge of a break-up, kind of a second chance fic, fluff, pda at the end
a/n: won't confirm nor deny this is inspired by mingyu's costume being that fuck ass main character from that f1 movie. anyway enjoy! and thanks to @livmarauder for helping me out with the fic because tunnel vision is real guys. check out her work, she's AMAZING <3 and another special thanks to mingyu expert @jakedustry for proofreading for me. she's so cool and you should check out her amazing works as well!
currently listening to: don't forget you love me - calum hood
SEVENTEEN M.LIST ✦ SIGN UP FOR MY TAGLIST HERE! ✦ ORBIT MAP
You were a bystander of Mingyu’s bad season.
After ending in third place the previous one, there were high hopes. Mingyu’s name had even come up when talking about possible contenders. You remembered how proud he was of the new car, and how the new regulations would only bend the rules in his favour.
In Australia, his car gave out in the middle of the race and he was forced to retire. In the moment, you’d thought nothing of it, just continuing your role of being his biggest support. ‘Just one bad start. It doesn’t mean that he’s out completely,’ commentators all around the world had declared. You had grounded yourself in that as well, and the next race, he managed to score a point despite the struggles he had with the car.
When he DNF’ed again and his teammate went with him, heads started to turn.
Not only did it put the pressure on the team to explain the possible causes, but Mingyu was reminded of his own words before the start of the season. He danced around it with curated precision, but made sure that the media were satisfied with his answer. Just like he practiced with his press officer.
The answers he would give when he talked about you were no different.
The media wouldn’t notice how his eyes clouded over, how he struggled to keep his shoulders straight and his smile on, as long as he kept saying the right words. Cherry-picking and feeding them to a group of people that had the power to twist them, but they never did.
Mingyu always knew what to say, even in moments where there were no words left.
You put the headphones down softly when the call came. The words hung in the air, suffocating all the people that were watching in the pit box with you. Your heart burned behind your ribcage. From the corner of your eye, people were shooting looks of sympathy, but you couldn’t focus on anything else than the pitlane.
The air punched out of your lungs when Mingyu’s car was pushed inside. His white helmet with blue accents and the number 17 stuck out just above the car. He put the steering wheel on the front of the car alongside with the headrest, pulling himself up on the halo.
The room pulsed as he took off his helmet, as if they were bracing themselves for a storm to come. Mingyu turned to you, his eyes scanning every inch of you. He walked up to you and stopped.
You swallowed and played with your bracelet, but he pulled you into a hug. Your shoulders tensed before you relaxed in his arms, managing a weak smile. “Are you okay?”
“Fine,” he mumbled in your neck. “It’s whatever.”
You hummed and rubbed his back in small circle motions, but Mingyu broke free. He shot you a last look before walking away. As per usual, you left the pit box to go with him. You trailed next to him, taking two steps for every one he took. You laced your fingers together and he accepted your affection. He broke away when he took interviews, joining forces with his press officer.
You watched from the sidelines as he gave the performance that he was trained for, as if this was just a small setback in his path to becoming world champion.
Mingyu’s energy was contagious, and he never left the room without any. He was charming, accessible and easy to love. Compared to how he behaved when he was in the paddock, there wasn’t a difference between your boyfriend and the man that drove one of the fastest cars in the world.
You still felt your heart skipping a beat, admiring how easily he could pull himself together and find the words without even hinting that he was frustrated with his performance, that he beat himself up for not pulling the weight and showing the results that he promised everyone.
He was a breath of fresh air.
You joined him again and walked to the pit box. His press officer waited outside his motorhome while you followed Mingyu inside. His hand rested on the small of your back when you stepped in. You pushed it away when the door closed behind you and walked to the couch.
“I’m going to take a shower,” Mingyu announced, but you didn’t respond. He scoffed and slammed the door shut.
You wondered if anyone had ever pinched through your act, even though there was nothing to prove that you weren’t on good terms. You always showed up together, holding hands, chatting and there was never a moment where your words – if someone ever approached you – were weighed carefully. Mingyu treated you like the world was your palace. That was the happy couple they’d been seeing for three years, ever since your relationship became public.
You couldn’t remember the last time you were happy with Mingyu.
The running water made you close your eyes, as if it was only you that existed. You liked it like that, when there was nobody around you for a couple of seconds. Since your relationship became public, you’d been in the spotlight. You chose to keep your life private regardless and Mingyu had always respected that.
Out of protection towards you, Mingyu’s current performance and the crumbs of your relationship that were left, all the energy you had went into pretending that everything was fine. Existing out of everyone’s eyes became your safe haven in moments where nothing could come to your aid.
You peeked an eye open when the door opened and lifted your head.
Mingyu hoisted himself into a fresh team shirt, a pair of jeans desperately clinging to his hips. He crinkled his nose and pulled his jeans up, tucking his shirt in. “Are you coming back to the pit box to watch the rest of the race?”
“Do I have a choice?” You bit back.
“I’m not in the race anymore, so yes, actually,” he answered calmly and finally looked up. His eyes were like a silent plea every time he looked at you. “Let me rephrase it. Will you be there for emotional support?”
You got off the couch with a scoff and followed him outside. You latched onto his bicep and leaned into him, your fingertips prickling as your nails dug into the fabric of his shirt.
He pulled you in closer and leaned in. “Don’t forget you love me.”
You smiled at him sweetly. “You’re very sure that I do.”
Mingyu looked ahead of him, his arm tense. When you got back into the pit box, he pressed a kiss to your lips before you parted ways. He walked to the pitwall, where he joined the strategists and team principal, and you stood behind the barrier with your headphones.
The rest of the race was a blur. You stared holes into Mingyu’s back, trying to guess what was going through his head. Secretly, you hoped that he was thinking about you, but those days had long passed. Whenever he thought of you, you knew that it bore resentment. He couldn’t look at you with anything else. Everything in front of the cameras was pretense.
You went back to his motorhome as Mingyu joined his team in celebrating the podium. You didn’t care how long it would take him. Hell, you didn’t care if he wouldn’t return at all. Everywhere Mingyu went, cameras followed and you did enough pretending for one day.
As you curled up on the couch, the door opened. The anger ached in your chest immediately, and you clutched your phone in your hand. You stared out of the window as a weight settled down next to you.
The scent of cedar and citrus coated you in a thick blanket of comfort, no matter how much you didn’t want it to. Fighting only made it easier to lose yourself in it, so you let it. For a while you sat in silence, as if you were both stubbornly waiting for the other to speak. The pressure on your chest made you suffocate.
“I’m going back to the hotel,” Mingyu finally said.
You looked at him blankly.
“You can choose to come with me, or you can stay behind and someone will come pick you up later.”
“But?” You countered.
Mingyu shot you a weak smile. “You know what I’m going to say.”
You looked out of the window again and crossed your arms.
He called your name softly. His hand slid to your thigh, burning up against your skin. When you pushed it away, he swallowed and shot you a small smile. “I get that this is not ideal–”
“Not ideal?” You interrupted, chuckling bitterly. “God, Mingyu, you have a lot of nerve to phrase it like that.”
“Baby–”
“Not ideal is when you accidentally double booked yourself. This,” you pointed your finger between him and you, “all of the pretending and the cameras, this is exhausting and demoralising and I’m losing hope that it will ever be fixed.”
Mingyu’s eyes widened, glimmering. He looked away and lowered his head. “I see,” he croaked. “I’m sorry.”
You got off the couch and grabbed your purse. “We’re going back to the hotel. I can’t do this, not here.”
But back at the hotel, you didn’t circle back to it. You were too tired to argue about it again, knowing that it wouldn’t fix anything. All Mingyu would tell you was that you had to hold out. It was only temporary and would blow over before you knew, but it’d been going on for months. Nothing was addressed and if anything, it was only getting worse.
Although, you doubted that talking about it would fix anything at that point.
You skipped dinner with Mingyu and ordered room service, munching on a fry as you stared into nothingness. The afternoon replayed in your head, nothing special since your little play, but it hadn’t cut a wound like usual, where you were left bleeding for days until you could look Mingyu in the eyes normally.
As your eyes flicked to your plate, your phone rang. Mingyu’s caller ID usually made your heart skip a beat, but all you could do was stare at it blankly. Hearing his voice would flush your chest with warmth, and you would think to yourself how lucky you were with a man like him by your side.
After enduring the past two months, you were hollowed out.
You put the empty plate aside and threw the suitcase on your bed. You snatched the clothes off the chair and folded them. From the bathroom, you grabbed your toiletries and put them back in the bag. Your summer dress was replaced by a shirt and sweatpants and you did your hair the way you usually would.
And before you knew it, you were on the plane back home.
[insert divider here]
You cried yourself to sleep one night, but slept like an angel the next. Some days, Mingyu was on your mind and you couldn’t focus on anything and others he was merely an afterthought. On those weekends, you watched the races from the comfort of your own home.
Sometimes you couldn’t even stomach the thought without bursting into tears.
Mingyu had tried talking to you on multiple occasions, but you told him you needed space. You couldn’t be around him, not like this, and your absence was noticed.
Like always, his words had landed with curated precision. He laughed, telling the camera that you were in a busy period with work. ‘The money doesn’t come from nowhere’, he’d teased.
Your eyes stung with tears as you cursed underneath your breath. You turned the TV off and plopped on the couch, staring into the nothingness.
Every time you saw him, flashing his canines at the camera mischievously, you were reminded of the times you were the one at the receiving end. Mingyu was one of the few people who could genuinely make you laugh. You hated your loud cackles, but Mingyu did everything in his power to pull them out of you.
That was his victory smile, as he came to call it.
You buried your head in your hands and sobbed all of the tears you’d been suppressing until you were a shell. Until there was nothing left for you to give anymore.
When you started dating Mingyu, you knew what you were getting yourself into. You didn’t care because you loved him. He valued your need for privacy and admired your courage to make it public anyway. You never had a knack for hiding; all you wanted was to show the world that you cared about him, that you supported him every step of the way.
Sometimes you wished that someone would actually catch you in the act. At least you could drop it that way.
A knock on the door interrupted the spiral. You dragged yourself towards the door and wiped your cheeks dry before opening the door.
Jeonghan took one look at you before he shot you a small smile. “I had a feeling I would see you like this.”
The tears flowed as if the past twenty minutes hadn’t even happened. You crashed into your best friend’s arms, burying your head in his chest.
He silently embraced you and rested his head on top of yours. “Your mother told me you were hiding out in your apartment,” he muttered. “I had to check on you.”
Deep down, you were glad she did.
Jeonghan sat you back down on the couch and walked to your kitchen. He came back with two cups of tea and took a seat next to you.
“I reached the final straw a couple of weeks ago,” you croaked. “Mingyu had another DNF and for some reason, I just couldn’t take it anymore. I just…” You paused and lowered your head. “I don’t know what happened.”
He observed you in silence, his hands wrapped around the cup. “What’s on your mind?”
Your eyes darted to him.
Jeonghan shot you a small smile in response.
“I guess I feel a little selfish for leaving so suddenly, and maybe I’m also wondering why I didn’t just back off entirely instead.” You rubbed your face with a sigh and threw yourself back in the cushions. Staring at the ceiling, the tears stung behind your eyes. “I could’ve spared myself the trouble, stayed home and taken my time and distance. Instead I was the one suggesting to go down this route.”
You glanced at your best friend. “Please don’t tell me I should stop beating myself up.”
He chuckled. “As if I would.”
You managed a small smile yourself and looked back up at the ceiling.
“I think it’s admirable that you wanted to try.”
Your head shot his way.
Jeonghan shrugged weakly. “You don’t know if it’s going to work, and I can empathise with the fact you held hope that it would, but have you ever talked about it?”
“Plenty of times,” you answered. “It just always ended in a fight and led to nowhere. We would both feel misunderstood by the other. It was the same conversation where we still hoped for a different outcome, but it never came.”
You shrugged. “I think we were way past the point of talking.”
He shuffled closer to you and put his cup down. “Would you like me to give some advice, or would you just like some company? I can tell that this conversation has been replaying in your head since you left.”
You looked at him and reached out, your fingers gently brushing his arm. “Just having you here is enough for now. Maybe when I’m in a better mood, I want some advice.”
Jeonghan slapped his thighs and got up. “Alright, then we’re ordering sushi and I’ll get us my best bottle of wine. It’s been too long since we had a proper night with just the two of us.”
You watched how he marched out of your apartment with a smile on your face, ignoring how your phone lit up. Jeonghan was right; it had been too long since you had a night together.
You grabbed your phone from the coffee table and turned it off. Mingyu would hear from you another time.
Jeonghan had left the subject alone as well, instead updating you on his personal life and the stunts his coworkers were pulling. You tried digging into his romantic endeavours, but he danced around the subject so smoothly, you knew that he was hiding something. Not wanting to pry, you left it alone.
Although, with enough alcohol in his system he would probably confess. You would let the trajectory of the night decide.
You were digesting the sushi, slouched on the couch while Jeonghan was browsing through your watchlist on Netflix. He commented on every sappy movie, pausing when he saw shows you’d watched a thousand times before, until he eventually gave up.
“You watch boring stuff,” he declared and threw the remote on the couch.
“Half of the suggestions aren’t even because of me,” you countered. “Mingyu wants to watch those sappy movies ninety percent of the time. I don’t even know why.”
“Probably because when you cry, he can comfort you.”
You snorted. “It’s rather the other way around. I always end up wiping his tears away.”
Jeonghan frowned. “Is he such a crybaby?”
“When he’s watching the Notebook, yes.”
He bobbed his head and clicked his tongue. “Well, you learn something new every day.”
You hummed and stared at the black screen.
“Do you miss him?”
“Yeah,” you whispered and sniffled. “I miss him so much.”
Jeonghan placed your head on his shoulder and rubbed your shoulder. “Maybe you’re not completely beyond the point of talking,” he said softly. “You just need to be honest with him, and with yourself.”
You closed your eyes and nodded. “Having such a high-demanding job is hard, especially when the public eye is involved and I’m afraid.” Your voice trembled. “I’m so afraid of losing him right now when the whole world is watching…”
“Which is why I admire your choice to keep showing up anyway. I hope Mingyu hasn’t forgotten what that means.”
There was a knock on your door and by the time Jeonghan opened it, you were too exhausted to fight the tears.
[insert divider here]
No race win could make up for what you had left behind the day you flew back home.
The looks Mingyu received every time he walked into the paddock had become more concerning every time, and he wondered if the press started putting two and two together throughout all his chirpy and charming demeanour. It hadn’t reflected in his performance the first two races, but when he crashed the car the next thinking about your fight, heads started to turn.
At night, all he thought about was you. The day you left replayed in his head and he kept searching for every single detail that could’ve helped him prevent you from going. He knew that it wasn’t just that day, or that it was just a small fight.
You had all the reason to leave. In fact, he’d braced himself for the day you would go, but it didn’t lessen the blow. He cried himself to sleep and the moment he landed into the new race week, he locked himself in his hotel. He only came out when he needed to and through all of it, he was expected to smile, to tell everyone how well he was going to do that weekend.
He was going to have to talk about you.
Press had made teasing remarks about your absence, slicing his heart in such an ignorant way that it made his skin prickle. He remembered laughing, telling them that the money didn’t come from nowhere and he moved on from the conversation just like that.
Mingyu met up with his strategists to discuss the race. The expected rain could be his saving grace if he knew how to utilise it, but expected was all it was. If it was just a normal race, he had to revert to medium and hard tyres to hold out. The softs under his car wouldn’t last even a lap, not on this track.
His teammate, Jun, was prioritised when it came to maximising the amount of points they could get that weekend. The prediction – for the first time since the finale of the previous season – was a double podium. For Jun, that meant a race win.
Mingyu’s job was to make sure to stay close behind his favoured teammate, holding up opponents so the gap between them became impossible to close. There hadn’t been a race win in the cards for him, and the championship that he promised to deliver started slipping out of his hands as well.
Jun had sat with him during lunch, but stayed uncharacteristically silent.
In between bites, it got on Mingyu’s nerves. “You can just speak your mind, you know,” he said tightly. “I’m well aware that I haven’t been delivering on my promises so just say what you want to say. No hard feelings from my side.”
“I was going to ask if you were okay.”
The force he felt in his gut was more than deserved.
Mingyu managed a soft ‘Oh’.
“I know this world is hard and we’re being measured by everything we do and say, but I hope you feel comfortable enough around me to share what’s been going on.” Jun offered him a smile. “We may be rivals on track, but I consider you a friend.”
He inhaled softly. “I’ll manage, but thank you anyway.”
Jun nodded and turned back to his food. “You’ll get there, I’m sure of it. One down period shouldn’t define the rest of your trajectory.”
Mingyu still debated whether he meant his career or his personal life, the words echoing in the back of his mind throughout the day.
The weekend flew by and he even managed to cling onto third place, but he didn’t stay to celebrate the double podium. In the hotel room, it all came crashing down on him again and somewhere between hours of crying and trying to call you, he’d fallen asleep.
Jun had texted him, but he ignored it and packed his suitcase.
Mingyu was happy he could go home. He missed the comfort of his own bed, of waking up in a pitch black room instead of flowy curtains dancing in the wind, forcing him awake at the slightest bit of light.
He pushed his suitcase aside and plopped on the couch, staring into the nothingness that was his home. The silence had a way of sending shivers down his spine while comforting him all the same. He wanted to cry, even though there was nothing left to give, and he wanted to throw everything in his sight and scream.
When you were around, at least the place felt a bit like home. Having moved from South Korea to the other side of the world, he’d always been out of place. Nothing seemed to settle him down, until you came along.
You made everything easy, bearable even. You showed him the balance between settling in his new hometown and honoring where he came from. When he talked about his career, you’d asked him questions that no one had ever thought of before, as if you desired to dig a layer deeper.
And you succeeded. Since the day you went out for Korean barbecue together, you’d stayed around.
Mingyu had never loved someone like you, let alone someone in the way he loved you. You were his voice of reason, his moment of chaos when he needed it. You were stability, spontaneity and structure all combined into one, an endless balance that you were keeping like it was breathing. You settled into his hectic and fast-paced lifestyle much easier than he expected you to.
He started loving you even deeper.
Coming home became something he looked forward to. His apartment was bright and lively, no matter if you were there to greet him or not. He could faintly trace your jasmine and coconut perfume, the warmth starting in his stomach before spreading through his whole body.
All he smelled now was lavender. The cleaning service had been in not too long ago, but his apartment was hollow. It rather felt like he was sitting in the home of someone else.
Mingyu’s entire world had fallen apart.
He checked his phone. Maybe you’d called him back, even if it was to tell him off. Your phone went straight to voicemail and where he usually hung up, he stuck around.
He just needed to hear your voice.
“Hi, baby,” he said softly. “I just… I want to talk to you. About all of this. I know that you want space, but it’s killing me to sit here without knowing what’s going to happen.”
The tears stung behind his eyes, the pressure in his chest unbearable. “All I want to know is if this is the end or not, okay? I don’t want to get my hopes up for nothing.”
He sniffled and whispered a soft goodbye before he threw the phone down next to him.
When his coach came over to prepare his meals with him, he just stared into the abyss. Whether he willfully ignored it or he genuinely didn’t notice, Mingyu couldn’t bring himself to care. All he wanted was you to call him back so he could start letting you go.
Because if you wanted it to be over, he had no choice but to accept it.
After one bite, Mingyu curled himself up on the couch. He closed his eyes, but all he saw was you. Screaming at him, embracing him, crying, running your hands through his hair, kissing him, screaming again.
Nothing he did relieved him of his fear becoming reality.
He glanced at his phone, but you hadn’t called him back. Mingyu was going to have to take matters into his own hands and it would either be the best decision he would ever make, or you would hate him forever.
He slid into his shoes, grabbed his phone and keys and got into his car. It was a small drive to the town over, but every second passing felt like you were slipping away from him further. His knuckles were white by the time he reached your block, his heart about to race itself to death.
It was all or nothing.
Mingyu got out of the car and walked up to the stairs. He looked up and started walking, all three sets until he reached your level. Right at the end of the gallery was your apartment, the crate with empty beer bottles stacked next to your front door.
With every step he took, his legs became heavier.
What was he doing? You clearly told him you needed space and he breached that trust by barging into your block unannounced. You would never forgive him for it, now that he was willing to cross every boundary you were going to set with him in the future.
But it’d been over a month since you left the hotel without a word. He wanted to know how you felt, and at some point the line between protecting your peace and avoiding the confrontation started to blur. Mingyu was going to have to barge through it himself.
He knocked on the door and stepped back, rubbing his fingers together. When the door opened, he tilted his head.
“Hey,” Jeonghan greeted him and looked back.
Mingyu looked past your best friend at you. He swallowed when your eyes glimmered. “Sorry for coming over so suddenly, but I couldn’t take it anymore.”
You nodded and wiped your cheeks. “Come in.”
He stepped in and nodded at Jeonghan. “Thank you.”
“Yeah, no problem.”
Mingyu lingered near the door and cleared his throat. “I–”
You embraced him tightly.
He wrapped his arms around you and nuzzled his face in your hair.
“We can talk in a second,” you sniffled. “I need a hug first.”
Mingyu squeezed his eyes shut, but a tear rolled down his cheek. “Me too, baby,” he whispered. He held you close, taking you in like it was the last time he would ever see you again.
He’d convinced himself it was until you ran into his arms.
Jeonghan smiled at you when you pulled back. “Call me if you need me, yeah?”
You nodded and wiped your tears away.
He looked at Mingyu and nodded, to which he returned the favour.
Mingyu turned to you and wiped your cheek with his thumb. “The situation’s been shitty, for both of us but mostly for you.”
“I wished it would’ve worked out how we hoped it would.” You smiled through your tears. “I didn’t want to stand in the way of your career.”
He grabbed both of your hands and squeezed them. “I know that I’m not always the best at juggling my personal life and my work, but you are never in the way.”
“If this would be the outcome, I never would’ve done it,” you said with a sniffle. “It was the easy way out instead of addressing the elephant in the room.”
Mingyu lowered his eyes and nodded. “Yeah.”
You led him to the couch leaned forward. “How are you truly doing, Mingyu?”
“I was on such a high after last season,” he started and smiled. “I came in third in the championship, and there was such hope that this year could be even better. I won a ton of races after all.”
You listened intently, your eyes scanning every detail of his face and your brows pushed together.
“When I walked into the factory to see the car and to test it, my hopes were completely gone and the season hadn’t even started yet.” Mingyu sighed deeply. “And how could I tell anyway? It was only February, a month and a half before the first face.”
“Were you scared to admit it?”
He nodded. “I started acting out because I was terrified that I would fail, and look where that has brought me. I fulfilled my own destiny.”
You nodded and leaned on your thighs. “And what could I have done differently to give you the space to be open about that?”
Mingyu opened his mouth, but he closed it again. “Baby, this is not your responsibility. I should’ve been honest.”
“But you weren’t, so I’ll ask again.” You looked right at him. “What could I have done differently so you would’ve felt comfortable?”
He lowered his eyes.
“Mingyu,” you grabbed his hand, “you need to be honest with me if we want to work through this.”
“You have a tendency to want to solve everything,” he heard himself say. At your lack of reaction, he looked up.
Your head was tilted, your eyes narrowed. After a silence, you clicked your tongue.
“I mean, you kind of proved me right already.”
Mingyu managed a small smile. “I admire your ability to think about solutions, but what I need sometimes is an ear, not a brain. And maybe, when you suggested that we would pretend nothing was happening, that was not what was best for us even though it was the logical solution so the press wouldn’t jump to conclusions.”
You nodded. “I agree with you.”
He shuffled closer and rubbed your thigh. “You need to allow yourself to take a breather more. What you did, taking your distance – even though it was suddenly – was a good thing.”
“It didn’t feel that way,” you muttered with a sigh. “I hated to leave you hanging like that, and I guess in hindsight that I was also kind of running from it. In case you hated me or something.”
“You and me both.” Mingyu caressed your cheek with a smile. “We should stop pretending, but I hope the act can be dropped completely. I don’t want to fight anymore.”
You wrapped your arms around his neck and buried your head in the crook of his neck. “You’ll talk, and I’ll listen, or am I too early to propose a solution?”
Mingyu laughed and pressed a kiss to your temple. “Sounds like a perfect idea.”
You fell asleep in his arms that night and Mingyu’s world was slowly built back up. His career might’ve not been what it needed to be, but he had you and that was all that mattered.
[insert divider here]
The press described it as the most anticipated return of the season, you would tell them that it had been coming all along.
Mingyu’s first win of the season came right before the summer break, when an unexpected crash between the front row gave way to the lead. Jun was right behind him, grinding the rest of the field to a halt so they could secure their 1-2 podium finish.
An entirely different person came out of the summer break, with you by his side. You fell in love with Mingyu all over again.
You’d joined for the last race of the season, tucked away in the paddock as you watched the screen. Mingyu was in second place and if he stayed there, he could round up the top three for the season. Jun had already been declared world champion, but he was leading the race anyway.
With the cord entangled in your hand, your fingers were crossed as Mingyu was told to come in for a last pitstop. He had a gap big enough to keep the position, but the pitstop had to go right.
As the car pulled up in the lane, the pit box pulsed. Your heart hammered in your chest as you watched the mechanics in their rehearsed rhythm, as if it was their second nature. All four tyres at once, switching from hard to mediums.
Within the blink of an eye, Mingyu took off.
You watched the screen, just when Mingyu entered the race track. His opponent was nowhere in sight.
As the pit box cheered, you released a soft breath of relief. All Mingyu had to do was hold out and he would come in third again.
When the last lap rang in, the team was already guiding you through the crowd. They put you right at the front of the barrier, next to his strategist. You were nearly pushed against the barrier, the team buzzing with excitement as their drivers were nearing the finish line. Some of the mechanics were climbing in the fences to cheer at them, even though that wasn’t allowed anymore.
The team did not seem to care.
The car with number 17 disappeared on the horizon and your heart skipped a beat. It stopped in front of the big banner with second place on it and Mingyu didn’t know how fast he had to get out.
The warmth spread through your chest when he stood on the hood of his car, pumping his fists in the air while the crowd roared. He jumped off and rushed into the arms of his mechanics, who nearly dragged him over the barrier.
“Crazy, those guys,” his strategist said to you, to which you chuckled.
Mingyu took his helmet off and turned your way, his lips twisting into a smile. He pressed your foreheads together, his chest rising and falling heavily.
“I think a night out is in order,” you whispered with a smile.
“We’ll think about that later.” He pressed your lips together in a kiss so eagerly that your knees buckled. You held onto his suit for stability and smiled against his lips.
Mingyu caressed your cheek and smiled. “I couldn’t have done it without you, baby. Thank you for everything.”
“Everything for you.” You turned him around gently. “Now, go celebrate that podium and suck in all the love and praise. I’ll be downstairs waiting for you.”
He walked away and looked over his shoulder.
“Don’t forget you love me, though.”
He smiled and disappeared inside. The rest of the day became a blur as the alcohol passed around the team, but you didn’t care. All that mattered to you was that you and Mingyu were happy again.
summary: After a fight with your boyfriend, you visit the flower shop that he’s a regular at, although you’re not entirely sure what your purpose is. Coincidentally, the flower shop becomes the very reason you can save your relationship from falling apart
wc: 3,937
tags: non-idol au, first blooms collab, tension, first fight, first reconciliation, it’s very tense, angst with a happy ending, fluff at the ending, light pda
a/n: so excited to be sharing my fic for the first blooms collab by @svthub! make sure to check the other fics as well, you're going to have a blast <3
You had no idea what you were going to get yourself into.
Tucked away underneath an umbrella, you stared at the sign on the shop window. Minghao was always the one decorating your place with flowers, always knowing exactly what would fit the season, the scenery, even your mood.
Now you had to do it yourself because your flowers were dying in your windowsill. Minghao wouldn’t be around to save them anytime soon. You never had much with flowers, but he loved it so you let him go crazy.
And honestly? Everything he put in there was gorgeous.
The thought tightened your chest. You nearly turned around and went home crying, but you pushed through the doors anyway.
You closed your umbrella and left it in the holder with the others. The smell of fresh flowers was all around you, and you recognised the daisies that were on your right. Observing them closely, tears welled in your eyes.
A stupid argument had completely escalated. An argument that you had a thousand times before, that led to nowhere, had made everything worse. When you thought about the way you started screaming at each other, the air punched out of your lungs. You’d never seen Minghao angry before – irritated at best – but you had ticked him off so badly that the vein in his neck visibly pulsed. The entire apartment complex could hear him, even though he switched to Chinese every few sentences.
Since that night, you hadn’t seen or spoken to him anymore. That was now two weeks ago and you were in a flower shop, looking as lost as you were. You were still not sure whether you were truly there to replace your dying flowers or if you didn’t know where else to go.
Strolling past the displays, you stopped in front of a bouquet of roses.
Minghao had often talked about them. Especially the pink and white flowers had always appealed to him and you’d never been able to pinpoint why. Just like many of his preferences, the mystery had left you wanting to know more. When you asked, you expected a very specific answer, something direct and tangible.
More often than not, he told you that some things didn’t need an explanation. It was a feeling you had and it left you with more questions than answers. You wanted things figured out, while Minghao was someone who could wait and see how things would go. ‘Go with the flow’, as he would’ve told you.
His flow didn’t exactly bring him back to you yet.
You headed into the back of the shop. Lavender, something you absolutely hated no matter how many times Minghao tried to introduce it to you. The smell was overbearing and overwhelming.
You turned back around, bumping right into a guy, guessing him to be around your age. Muttering a quick apology, you stepped out of the way, but he chuckled.
“I was actually here to help you,” he said and crossed his arms behind his back. “First time here?”
“Do I look that obviously out of place?”
He flashed a smile.
You clicked your tongue. “Alright. Loud and clear.”
The guy chuckled and started walking. “The actual reason is that I haven’t seen you around here. I would recognise you if you were a regular.”
“Ah.” You trailed after him. “My… um, my boyfriend comes here often. If anyone’s the regular, it’s him.”
He looked back at you and narrowed his eyes, scanning you up and down. “Your boyfriend…”
“I think.”
Mentally you were already strangling yourself for letting it slip out, but he ignored it to your surprise. You breathed out softly and stopped when he did.
“Is he broad and muscular?”
You couldn’t help but snort before composing yourself. You shook your head. “Sorry. No, he’s not.”
“Guessing by that reaction, he’s the opposite.”
“I wouldn’t describe him as ‘broad’, no.”
An amused smile decorated the man’s face. “Longer blond hair?”
Your stomach tingled. “As of recently, yes.”
“Oh, Minghao,” he cooed and clasped his hands together. “He would be laughing in my face if I told him that you were here.”
You tilted your head with a frown.
The man took you to the front of the shop, where you were admiring the daisies earlier. He grabbed a couple of white ones out of the bucket and turned around. “Minghao always comes here to pick out flowers for your house then, I assume, and he talks about you on many occasions.”
He walked to a couple of other buckets and picked some pink flowers. “I vividly remember him telling me that you would never be found here. Look at you now!”
You blinked a couple of times. It was the first time you ever saw him, but he was spewing information like he knew you better than you knew yourself, talking like he was catching up with an old friend.
With a weak nod, you looked at the flowers in his hand. “Minghao was completely right in saying that.”
“What brings you here?”
You looked at him, opening your mouth to say something before closing it. Shrugging, you shot him a small smile. “I don’t know, to be honest. It just felt right coming here.”
He returned the smile warmly before handing you the bouquet. “You made the right choice, then.”
The bouquet had been sitting in a vase in your kitchen for days. You’d been pondering over what to say to Minghao and how you were going to approach him in the first place. It was almost three weeks ago since your last contact and you were reaching your final straw.
When you called him, you got voicemail. Expecting him to call back, you left him be until a call would never come. Slowly, the empty feeling in your chest started filling up with a burning sensation, until you had enough.
You stood in front of his door with a hammering heart. The lock clicked and he peeked his head around the corner.
Minghao seemed surprised to see you as he opened the door. “Hey, what are you doing here?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” you shrugged, pretending to think, “maybe trying to get back in touch with you so we can get this over with.”
He leaned against the door. “Okay, what do you have to say?”
“Why don’t you pick up when I try to call you?”
“Because I have a right to decline.”
Your eyes clouded over, piercing right through him.
Minghao shrugged, your name rolling off his lips so calmly, you got shivers. “You’re not even sure what you’re going to say.”
You crossed your arms and cocked your eyebrow. “I am.”
He repeated your gesture and straightened his posture. You hated that through all the anger, he still managed to make your heart skip a beat. His eyes still held a softness for you, and you know he was more than open to hear you out.
You were the one visiting him, after all.
“Well,” you started and cleared your throat, “I think it’s unfair of you to assume that I don’t know what to say.”
“Can you prove me wrong, though?” Minghao asked. “Whenever we’re arguing, you say the same thing in five different ways. And frankly, we never get it solved.”
Before you had a defence at the ready, he cut you off.
“I’m not going to do it, not like this.” Minghao offered you a small smile. “Figure out what you want first.”
“Minghao–”
He shut the door.
You stared at it, head spinning. You were angry, upset, hurt, disappointed and unable to ride out one. You wanted to pounce at the door and scream at him, but you wanted to cry in his arms all the same.
Instead you ended up back home.
The bouquet had withered by the time you decided to do something else than go to work, the rose petals that were still clinging on a faint brown. The rest of them were on the kitchen table drying up.
You shoved your hands into your pockets and walked the block, taking a left and walking straight into the city. You didn’t have a destination in mind, you just needed to catch some fresh air.
After a good month since your fight with Minghao, the flow hadn’t brought him back to you still. On the contrary, even. You had a feeling he drifted away from you if you didn’t do something soon.
In all your anger and confusion, you’d stood on his doorstep the night before. Once again, Minghao had opened the door and you even made it into his apartment. The conversation seemed to go well and you were making progress.
Until it was your turn to talk. The conversation had escalated once again and you left with the anger burning your chest to ashes. Everything that he’d said had fallen on deaf ears and you started to realise that the problem wasn’t with Minghao.
You pushed through the doors. The daisies on your right side were the first thing you smelled, a warmth wrapping around you like a comforting blanket. Since your last visit, not much had changed in their display. Some colours had been replaced or switched around to make it more appealing, but that was the biggest change you could find.
Bowing over the daisies, you inhaled.
“Look at that.”
You shot up and looked right in those mischievous eyes.
“Are you becoming a regular?” The same guy asked, arms crossed behind his back. His lips twisted into a grin. “Welcome back. I guess that you’re still a little clueless?”
“Yep.” You looked around before your eyes landed on him. “The last bouquet kind of died and I couldn’t help but feel a little guilty.”
“I expected nothing less.” He beckoned you and started walking. “You’re around more than Minghao and that says a lot. Is something going on?”
You shrugged and crossed your arms over your body. “We’re kind of on a rough patch right now.”
He hummed and stopped by the counter, leaning on it as he watched his coworker helping someone else. “I think it’s very ironic that you find yourself here of all places.”
You looked at him with a tilted head.
“You’re not someone that cares much for flowers,” the guy started. “You’re okay with Minghao decorating your house with it because he loves it, but that’s all. And now you’re in a rough patch and where are you right now? A place that he loves more than you do.”
You hummed and looked away.
“What I’m trying to say is that you’re not here without a reason, you just need to know how to return the gesture to him.”
“Have you ever considered becoming a public speaker?”
The guy laughed. “Next to being a florist, I also offer free therapy sessions. Part of the job.” His chuckles eased into a smile. “You have no idea the things I’ve seen since working here. Flowers play a bigger role in people’s lives than you might assume.”
“I get why you and Minghao get along so well,” you remarked. “It’s like hearing him speak as we’re talking right now.”
“Like attracts like.” He winked and patted the counter. “I need to look over deliveries. Take a look around and call for me if you need me.”
You nodded and watched how he slid behind the counter and disappeared in the back. Walking back to the daisies, you kneeled down. They had all kinds of colours, blending into each other so seamlessly it made you smile.
The purple ones had been in your house before. You remembered getting a promotion at work, and telling Minghao was the most exciting part of the day. That same night, you had a small bouquet, which included the purple daisies.
You’d always assumed they were purple because it was your favourite colour, but it was the only time you’d seen them. Faded to the back of your mind, passing it off as something insignificant.
As if it had never mattered at all.
With a soft sigh, you came back up. You dusted your pants off and straightened your jacket. As you turned around, you bumped into someone.
“Did I look lost again?” You remarked with a chuckle. When you looked up, Minghao was staring right back at you.
You froze.
His eyes scanned you carefully, and you couldn’t help but drown in them.
“You do look kind of lost,” he finally said. “I thought my mind was playing tricks on me when I saw you here.”
You shrugged weakly and crossed your arms over your body.
Minghao nodded at the buckets. “What were you looking at?”
Your eyes darted to the purple daisies.
“Ah,” he hummed and bowed down, picking one from the bucket. He observed it before giving it to you.
You took it carefully and held it to your chest.
“I know purple is your favourite colour.” He nodded his head at the flower. “That’s not what that daisy is about.”
You tilted your head. “What do you mean?”
Minghao placed a hand on the small of your back and guided you further into the shop. The touch was electric, lighting a flame that you thought had long died out. “Purple daisies resemble success, and admiration. When I put them in your living room, I was celebrating your promotion.”
He picked a pink flower. “Pink lilies bear the same meaning, and they were also in that same bouquet. Admiration and gratitude.”
You took the lily from him. “What flowers say ‘I’m sorry for everything, please forgive me?’”
Minghao stopped in his tracks. He looked over his shoulder.
You took a small step towards him. “I really am sorry, Hao. I don’t want you to feel undervalued, or misunderstood, and I hate myself for not realising earlier that that’s what this is all about.”
He turned around in full.
“You know,” you looked up at him with a small smile, “if I would’ve engaged earlier, be more open-minded like you’d tell me,” you nudged Minghao, making him chuckle. “I would’ve realised much sooner that it’s one of the most touching gestures someone has ever made for me. So that’s what I’ll try to do from now on.”
He smiled at you.
You caressed his cheek. “And hearing you spew these facts out like it’s breathing, it warms my heart, and it actually makes me excited to hear more.”
“I’m sorry too, my love,” Minghao muttered and leaned into your touch. “I’m very quick to jump to conclusions sometimes and it’s unfair to you especially since you need a little longer to gather your thoughts. I should’ve given you proper time and space to do so, instead of pushing the blame all on you.”
You wrapped your arms around his waist and rested your head on his chest. “We’ll work on this just fine, my love. I’m very sure of it.”
Minghao pressed a long kiss into your hair. “I love you so much, darling. So so much.”
You looked up at him and smiled. “I love you, too.”
He kissed you so eagerly that the heat pooled in your stomach. His hands gripped your waist, nails dipping into your sides like you would disappear again. When you pulled him in closer, he chuckled against your lips.
You pouted when he pulled back.
“I came here to pick up my order,” he muttered. “I need to get back to work.”
“See you tonight?” You offered, to which he smiled.
“You have a key.”
You pressed one last kiss to his lips and watched him walking to the counter. He was talking to the same guy that had taken you under his wing.
As Minghao slipped past, he squeezed your waist. “Seungkwan wants to talk to you,” he whispered and kissed your temple. He rushed out of the door and disappeared around the corner.
You looked over at Seungkwan, who waved at you. With a chuckle, you walked over to him. “What could you possibly need me for?”
“Let’s make you a bouquet for Minghao,” he said with a smile. “I’ll tell you all I need to know.”
When you walked out of the shop with the bouquet, you were light as a feather. Your stomach tingled whenever you thought of how Minghao’s eyes would light up, how he would kiss you passionately that you melted in his arms. Since your fight, you hadn’t felt so excited to see him again.
You knew that he wouldn’t get off work for another hour and set out to his house. The bouquet rested in your hand as you twisted the lock, slipping in before any of his neighbours would see you.
As you looked around, there wasn’t a flower in sight.
The empty vases were lined up on the counter on a towel. They looked dried up and you had no trouble believing they’d been there for a couple of days. Purposeless.
You grabbed the vase that Minghao painted himself, tracing the dried streaks with a smile. You filled it with water and put it in, setting the vase on the saloon table in the living room. ‘A center piece’, Minghao had often told you. You hoped that this would meet his requirements.
Minghao had texted you about dinner, opting that he would get something on his way home. You agreed with a smile.
When you heard the lock clicking not much later, your heart jumped.
You rubbed your hands together and balanced from the front to the heel of your feet.
Minghao pushed the door back into its lock with his hip, the crackling of a plastic bag following him around. When he walked into the living room, he yelped.
Covering your mouth, you suppressed a giggle. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“What are you already doing here?” His eyes darted to the bouquet on the table and his lips twisted into a smile. “That wasn’t there before.”
“Happened to come with me,” you watched him set the bag down and observe it. “Seungkwan helped me. It’s not how the professionals do it, but–”
“It’s perfect.” Minghao looked back at you and opened his arms. “Come here, you.”
You walked right into his arms, inhaling his citrus, amber scent. You closed your eyes with a hum. “I missed you a lot, Hao.”
“I you too, my love.” He ran a hand through your hair before pressing a kiss to it. “Let’s eat before dinner gets cold.”
You peeked inside the bag curiously and smiled brightly. You grabbed the servings and sat down on the ground. “You know, why Seungkwan works in a flower shop is beyond me,” you said and opened the container.
Minghao chuckled. “He’s a talker, hm?”
“He is.” You put the other one in front of your boyfriend and grabbed a spoon and a pair of chopsticks. “A good one at that, though. Very convincing.”
“He’s helped me since the first time I set foot in that place,” he started and stirred his soup. “I just moved to the city and I wanted a good bouquet for my living room.”
“The center piece,” you said in unison.
Minghao looked at you with a smile before he continued. “He knows everything there is to know and I really formed some kind of friendship with him.”
“He’s a nice guy.” The broth you sipped from was an explosion of flavours, making you groan. “God, I missed this.”
“I thought I’d treat you.”
With a smile, you spent the rest of the dinner catching up with Minghao; work, your parents, your friends. For the first time it wasn’t silent, as if your relationship had completely reinvented itself.
As Minghao was at the counter cutting the branches of the flowers, you stood behind him, your arms wrapped around him. Your head rested against his back, your eyes closed. “If you cut them at an angle, they’re able to absorb more water,” he told you. “Your beautiful bouquet will stay alive for a very long time.”
You smiled. “I worked very hard on it.” You peeked up at him. “Can I tell you about the flowers?”
His smile grew. “I would love to hear it.”
“I picked the blue orchids first,” you said and looked out of the window. “I had never seen it before, but it’s a way to express that you think of someone as beautiful in a unique way. And Seungkwan told me it’s spiritual so naturally, I had to pick it.”
“Flattered.”
You grinned at him. “You should be.”
“And then you chose red lilies,” Minghao continued, followed by a sheer cut.
“I know it looks a little odd next to the orchid, but they’re a symbol of love. I thought a red rose was too standard, so Seungkwan showed me these.”
Minghao looked back at you. “You really put a lot of thought into this, didn’t you?”
“And I’m not even finished,” you said with a small smile, the heat flushing your cheeks. “I did pick white and pink roses because they made me think of you.”
He smiled and put the bouquet back into the vase as you let go of him. “Pink is joy and appreciation.”
“And white symbolises a fresh start,” you added. You pointed at the daffodils on the side. “Just like those, moving away and transforming.”
“And pink camellias because you missed me.” Minghao bumped your hip. “Sappy.”
You chuckled and bumped him back.
He draped an arm around your shoulder and locked you into his side. “Thank you. Truly.”
You stood on your toes and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’ll do anything for you.”
You finally regretted speaking that into existence when you found yourself in the flower shop again a couple of weeks later. Your eyes darted around before you looked back at Minghao. “Seriously?”
“You claim to know so much about this now,” he answered with a shrug. “I would love to see you make a bouquet for your own apartment.”
Shooting him a sweet smile, you traced his arm. “But aren’t you sad that you can’t do it for me anymore?”
“Nope.”
“Was worth a try.” You looked around again and your eyes landed on Seungkwan. When he looked back at you, his eyes lit up.
He came over hurriedly. “You finally got her here!”
You arched an eyebrow and turned to Minghao.
“We’re here for some pieces for her apartment,” he said and placed a hand on the small of your back. “She’s going to pick them out herself, as she’s claiming to have the hang of it.”
Seungkwan bobbed his head, his upper lip curved upwards like he was impressed. He remained where we stood and smiled. “What are you looking for?”
“Something for my kitchen,” you answered and frowned. “Why does this feel like a test?”
Behind you, Minghao chuckled. He pushed you forward gently and followed you to the daisies. “I told you she would go there first.”
Seungkwan chuckled and joined you at the front of the shop. Instead of walking after him, you navigated the shop like it was your second home. With a bright smile, you walked out of the shop with the bouquet and your boyfriend back by your side.
A place that you never thought you would ever step foot in had become like a second home in an oddly beautiful way. After your fight with Minghao, that very shop had brought you back to each other like no flow could. And this time, you wouldn’t drift away from each other anymore.
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summary: With a bad start of the season, you and Mingyu try to save your relationship from falling apart.
wc: 6,059
tags: non-idol au, f1 au, established relationship, tension, on the verge of a break-up, kind of a second chance fic, fluff, pda at the end
a/n: won't confirm nor deny this is inspired by mingyu's costume being that fuck ass main character from that f1 movie. anyway enjoy! and thanks to @livmarauder for helping me out with the fic because tunnel vision is real guys. check out her work, she's AMAZING <3 and another special thanks to mingyu expert @jakedustry for proofreading for me. she's so cool and you should check out her amazing works as well!
currently listening to: don't forget you love me - calum hood
You were a bystander of Mingyu’s bad season.
After ending in third place the previous one, there were high hopes. Mingyu’s name had even come up when talking about possible contenders. You remembered how proud he was of the new car, and how the new regulations would only bend the rules in his favour.
In Australia, his car gave out in the middle of the race and he was forced to retire. In the moment, you’d thought nothing of it, just continuing your role of being his biggest support. ‘Just one bad start. It doesn’t mean that he’s out completely,’ commentators all around the world had declared. You had grounded yourself in that as well, and the next race, he managed to score a point despite the struggles he had with the car.
When he DNF’ed again and his teammate went with him, heads started to turn.
Not only did it put the pressure on the team to explain the possible causes, but Mingyu was reminded of his own words before the start of the season. He danced around it with curated precision, but made sure that the media were satisfied with his answer. Just like he practiced with his press officer.
The answers he would give when he talked about you were no different.
The media wouldn’t notice how his eyes clouded over, how he struggled to keep his shoulders straight and his smile on, as long as he kept saying the right words. Cherry-picking and feeding them to a group of people that had the power to twist them, but they never did.
Mingyu always knew what to say, even in moments where there were no words left.
You put the headphones down softly when the call came. The words hung in the air, suffocating all the people that were watching in the pit box with you. Your heart burned behind your ribcage. From the corner of your eye, people were shooting looks of sympathy, but you couldn’t focus on anything else than the pitlane.
The air punched out of your lungs when Mingyu’s car was pushed inside. His white helmet with blue accents and the number 17 stuck out just above the car. He put the steering wheel on the front of the car alongside with the headrest, pulling himself up on the halo.
The room pulsed as he took off his helmet, as if they were bracing themselves for a storm to come. Mingyu turned to you, his eyes scanning every inch of you. He walked up to you and stopped.
You swallowed and played with your bracelet, but he pulled you into a hug. Your shoulders tensed before you relaxed in his arms, managing a weak smile. “Are you okay?”
“Fine,” he mumbled in your neck. “It’s whatever.”
You hummed and rubbed his back in small circle motions, but Mingyu broke free. He shot you a last look before walking away. As per usual, you left the pit box to go with him. You trailed next to him, taking two steps for every one he took. You laced your fingers together and he accepted your affection. He broke away when he took interviews, joining forces with his press officer.
You watched from the sidelines as he gave the performance that he was trained for, as if this was just a small setback in his path to becoming world champion.
Mingyu’s energy was contagious, and he never left the room without any. He was charming, accessible and easy to love. Compared to how he behaved when he was in the paddock, there wasn’t a difference between your boyfriend and the man that drove one of the fastest cars in the world.
You still felt your heart skipping a beat, admiring how easily he could pull himself together and find the words without even hinting that he was frustrated with his performance, that he beat himself up for not pulling the weight and showing the results that he promised everyone.
He was a breath of fresh air.
You joined him again and walked to the pit box. His press officer waited outside his motorhome while you followed Mingyu inside. His hand rested on the small of your back when you stepped in. You pushed it away when the door closed behind you and walked to the couch.
“I’m going to take a shower,” Mingyu announced, but you didn’t respond. He scoffed and slammed the door shut.
You wondered if anyone had ever pinched through your act, even though there was nothing to prove that you weren’t on good terms. You always showed up together, holding hands, chatting and there was never a moment where your words – if someone ever approached you – were weighed carefully. Mingyu treated you like the world was your palace. That was the happy couple they’d been seeing for three years, ever since your relationship became public.
You couldn’t remember the last time you were happy with Mingyu.
The running water made you close your eyes, as if it was only you that existed. You liked it like that, when there was nobody around you for a couple of seconds. Since your relationship became public, you’d been in the spotlight. You chose to keep your life private regardless and Mingyu had always respected that.
Out of protection towards you, Mingyu’s current performance and the crumbs of your relationship that were left, all the energy you had went into pretending that everything was fine. Existing out of everyone’s eyes became your safe haven in moments where nothing could come to your aid.
You peeked an eye open when the door opened and lifted your head.
Mingyu hoisted himself into a fresh team shirt, a pair of jeans desperately clinging to his hips. He crinkled his nose and pulled his jeans up, tucking his shirt in. “Are you coming back to the pit box to watch the rest of the race?”
“Do I have a choice?” You bit back.
“I’m not in the race anymore, so yes, actually,” he answered calmly and finally looked up. His eyes were like a silent plea every time he looked at you. “Let me rephrase it. Will you be there for emotional support?”
You got off the couch with a scoff and followed him outside. You latched onto his bicep and leaned into him, your fingertips prickling as your nails dug into the fabric of his shirt.
He pulled you in closer and leaned in. “Don’t forget you love me.”
You smiled at him sweetly. “You’re very sure that I do.”
Mingyu looked ahead of him, his arm tense. When you got back into the pit box, he pressed a kiss to your lips before you parted ways. He walked to the pitwall, where he joined the strategists and team principal, and you stood behind the barrier with your headphones.
The rest of the race was a blur. You stared holes into Mingyu’s back, trying to guess what was going through his head. Secretly, you hoped that he was thinking about you, but those days had long passed. Whenever he thought of you, you knew that it bore resentment. He couldn’t look at you with anything else. Everything in front of the cameras was pretense.
You went back to his motorhome as Mingyu joined his team in celebrating the podium. You didn’t care how long it would take him. Hell, you didn’t care if he wouldn’t return at all. Everywhere Mingyu went, cameras followed and you did enough pretending for one day.
As you curled up on the couch, the door opened. The anger ached in your chest immediately, and you clutched your phone in your hand. You stared out of the window as a weight settled down next to you.
The scent of cedar and citrus coated you in a thick blanket of comfort, no matter how much you didn’t want it to. Fighting only made it easier to lose yourself in it, so you let it. For a while you sat in silence, as if you were both stubbornly waiting for the other to speak. The pressure on your chest made you suffocate.
“I’m going back to the hotel,” Mingyu finally said.
You looked at him blankly.
“You can choose to come with me, or you can stay behind and someone will come pick you up later.”
“But?” You countered.
Mingyu shot you a weak smile. “You know what I’m going to say.”
You looked out of the window again and crossed your arms.
He called your name softly. His hand slid to your thigh, burning up against your skin. When you pushed it away, he swallowed and shot you a small smile. “I get that this is not ideal–”
“Not ideal?” You interrupted, chuckling bitterly. “God, Mingyu, you have a lot of nerve to phrase it like that.”
“Baby–”
“Not ideal is when you accidentally double booked yourself. This,” you pointed your finger between him and you, “all of the pretending and the cameras, this is exhausting and demoralising and I’m losing hope that it will ever be fixed.”
Mingyu’s eyes widened, glimmering. He looked away and lowered his head. “I see,” he croaked. “I’m sorry.”
You got off the couch and grabbed your purse. “We’re going back to the hotel. I can’t do this, not here.”
But back at the hotel, you didn’t circle back to it. You were too tired to argue about it again, knowing that it wouldn’t fix anything. All Mingyu would tell you was that you had to hold out. It was only temporary and would blow over before you knew, but it’d been going on for months. Nothing was addressed and if anything, it was only getting worse.
Although, you doubted that talking about it would fix anything at that point.
You skipped dinner with Mingyu and ordered room service, munching on a fry as you stared into nothingness. The afternoon replayed in your head, nothing special since your little play, but it hadn’t cut a wound like usual, where you were left bleeding for days until you could look Mingyu in the eyes normally.
As your eyes flicked to your plate, your phone rang. Mingyu’s caller ID usually made your heart skip a beat, but all you could do was stare at it blankly. Hearing his voice would flush your chest with warmth, and you would think to yourself how lucky you were with a man like him by your side.
After enduring the past two months, you were hollowed out.
You put the empty plate aside and threw the suitcase on your bed. You snatched the clothes off the chair and folded them. From the bathroom, you grabbed your toiletries and put them back in the bag. Your summer dress was replaced by a shirt and sweatpants and you did your hair the way you usually would.
And before you knew it, you were on the plane back home.
[insert divider here]
You cried yourself to sleep one night, but slept like an angel the next. Some days, Mingyu was on your mind and you couldn’t focus on anything and others he was merely an afterthought. On those weekends, you watched the races from the comfort of your own home.
Sometimes you couldn’t even stomach the thought without bursting into tears.
Mingyu had tried talking to you on multiple occasions, but you told him you needed space. You couldn’t be around him, not like this, and your absence was noticed.
Like always, his words had landed with curated precision. He laughed, telling the camera that you were in a busy period with work. ‘The money doesn’t come from nowhere’, he’d teased.
Your eyes stung with tears as you cursed underneath your breath. You turned the TV off and plopped on the couch, staring into the nothingness.
Every time you saw him, flashing his canines at the camera mischievously, you were reminded of the times you were the one at the receiving end. Mingyu was one of the few people who could genuinely make you laugh. You hated your loud cackles, but Mingyu did everything in his power to pull them out of you.
That was his victory smile, as he came to call it.
You buried your head in your hands and sobbed all of the tears you’d been suppressing until you were a shell. Until there was nothing left for you to give anymore.
When you started dating Mingyu, you knew what you were getting yourself into. You didn’t care because you loved him. He valued your need for privacy and admired your courage to make it public anyway. You never had a knack for hiding; all you wanted was to show the world that you cared about him, that you supported him every step of the way.
Sometimes you wished that someone would actually catch you in the act. At least you could drop it that way.
A knock on the door interrupted the spiral. You dragged yourself towards the door and wiped your cheeks dry before opening the door.
Jeonghan took one look at you before he shot you a small smile. “I had a feeling I would see you like this.”
The tears flowed as if the past twenty minutes hadn’t even happened. You crashed into your best friend’s arms, burying your head in his chest.
He silently embraced you and rested his head on top of yours. “Your mother told me you were hiding out in your apartment,” he muttered. “I had to check on you.”
Deep down, you were glad she did.
Jeonghan sat you back down on the couch and walked to your kitchen. He came back with two cups of tea and took a seat next to you.
“I reached the final straw a couple of weeks ago,” you croaked. “Mingyu had another DNF and for some reason, I just couldn’t take it anymore. I just…” You paused and lowered your head. “I don’t know what happened.”
He observed you in silence, his hands wrapped around the cup. “What’s on your mind?”
Your eyes darted to him.
Jeonghan shot you a small smile in response.
“I guess I feel a little selfish for leaving so suddenly, and maybe I’m also wondering why I didn’t just back off entirely instead.” You rubbed your face with a sigh and threw yourself back in the cushions. Staring at the ceiling, the tears stung behind your eyes. “I could’ve spared myself the trouble, stayed home and taken my time and distance. Instead I was the one suggesting to go down this route.”
You glanced at your best friend. “Please don’t tell me I should stop beating myself up.”
He chuckled. “As if I would.”
You managed a small smile yourself and looked back up at the ceiling.
“I think it’s admirable that you wanted to try.”
Your head shot his way.
Jeonghan shrugged weakly. “You don’t know if it’s going to work, and I can empathise with the fact you held hope that it would, but have you ever talked about it?”
“Plenty of times,” you answered. “It just always ended in a fight and led to nowhere. We would both feel misunderstood by the other. It was the same conversation where we still hoped for a different outcome, but it never came.”
You shrugged. “I think we were way past the point of talking.”
He shuffled closer to you and put his cup down. “Would you like me to give some advice, or would you just like some company? I can tell that this conversation has been replaying in your head since you left.”
You looked at him and reached out, your fingers gently brushing his arm. “Just having you here is enough for now. Maybe when I’m in a better mood, I want some advice.”
Jeonghan slapped his thighs and got up. “Alright, then we’re ordering sushi and I’ll get us my best bottle of wine. It’s been too long since we had a proper night with just the two of us.”
You watched how he marched out of your apartment with a smile on your face, ignoring how your phone lit up. Jeonghan was right; it had been too long since you had a night together.
You grabbed your phone from the coffee table and turned it off. Mingyu would hear from you another time.
Jeonghan had left the subject alone as well, instead updating you on his personal life and the stunts his coworkers were pulling. You tried digging into his romantic endeavours, but he danced around the subject so smoothly, you knew that he was hiding something. Not wanting to pry, you left it alone.
Although, with enough alcohol in his system he would probably confess. You would let the trajectory of the night decide.
You were digesting the sushi, slouched on the couch while Jeonghan was browsing through your watchlist on Netflix. He commented on every sappy movie, pausing when he saw shows you’d watched a thousand times before, until he eventually gave up.
“You watch boring stuff,” he declared and threw the remote on the couch.
“Half of the suggestions aren’t even because of me,” you countered. “Mingyu wants to watch those sappy movies ninety percent of the time. I don’t even know why.”
“Probably because when you cry, he can comfort you.”
You snorted. “It’s rather the other way around. I always end up wiping his tears away.”
Jeonghan frowned. “Is he such a crybaby?”
“When he’s watching the Notebook, yes.”
He bobbed his head and clicked his tongue. “Well, you learn something new every day.”
You hummed and stared at the black screen.
“Do you miss him?”
“Yeah,” you whispered and sniffled. “I miss him so much.”
Jeonghan placed your head on his shoulder and rubbed your shoulder. “Maybe you’re not completely beyond the point of talking,” he said softly. “You just need to be honest with him, and with yourself.”
You closed your eyes and nodded. “Having such a high-demanding job is hard, especially when the public eye is involved and I’m afraid.” Your voice trembled. “I’m so afraid of losing him right now when the whole world is watching…”
“Which is why I admire your choice to keep showing up anyway. I hope Mingyu hasn’t forgotten what that means.”
There was a knock on your door and by the time Jeonghan opened it, you were too exhausted to fight the tears.
[insert divider here]
No race win could make up for what you had left behind the day you flew back home.
The looks Mingyu received every time he walked into the paddock had become more concerning every time, and he wondered if the press started putting two and two together throughout all his chirpy and charming demeanour. It hadn’t reflected in his performance the first two races, but when he crashed the car the next thinking about your fight, heads started to turn.
At night, all he thought about was you. The day you left replayed in his head and he kept searching for every single detail that could’ve helped him prevent you from going. He knew that it wasn’t just that day, or that it was just a small fight.
You had all the reason to leave. In fact, he’d braced himself for the day you would go, but it didn’t lessen the blow. He cried himself to sleep and the moment he landed into the new race week, he locked himself in his hotel. He only came out when he needed to and through all of it, he was expected to smile, to tell everyone how well he was going to do that weekend.
He was going to have to talk about you.
Press had made teasing remarks about your absence, slicing his heart in such an ignorant way that it made his skin prickle. He remembered laughing, telling them that the money didn’t come from nowhere and he moved on from the conversation just like that.
Mingyu met up with his strategists to discuss the race. The expected rain could be his saving grace if he knew how to utilise it, but expected was all it was. If it was just a normal race, he had to revert to medium and hard tyres to hold out. The softs under his car wouldn’t last even a lap, not on this track.
His teammate, Jun, was prioritised when it came to maximising the amount of points they could get that weekend. The prediction – for the first time since the finale of the previous season – was a double podium. For Jun, that meant a race win.
Mingyu’s job was to make sure to stay close behind his favoured teammate, holding up opponents so the gap between them became impossible to close. There hadn’t been a race win in the cards for him, and the championship that he promised to deliver started slipping out of his hands as well.
Jun had sat with him during lunch, but stayed uncharacteristically silent.
In between bites, it got on Mingyu’s nerves. “You can just speak your mind, you know,” he said tightly. “I’m well aware that I haven’t been delivering on my promises so just say what you want to say. No hard feelings from my side.”
“I was going to ask if you were okay.”
The force he felt in his gut was more than deserved.
Mingyu managed a soft ‘Oh’.
“I know this world is hard and we’re being measured by everything we do and say, but I hope you feel comfortable enough around me to share what’s been going on.” Jun offered him a smile. “We may be rivals on track, but I consider you a friend.”
He inhaled softly. “I’ll manage, but thank you anyway.”
Jun nodded and turned back to his food. “You’ll get there, I’m sure of it. One down period shouldn’t define the rest of your trajectory.”
Mingyu still debated whether he meant his career or his personal life, the words echoing in the back of his mind throughout the day.
The weekend flew by and he even managed to cling onto third place, but he didn’t stay to celebrate the double podium. In the hotel room, it all came crashing down on him again and somewhere between hours of crying and trying to call you, he’d fallen asleep.
Jun had texted him, but he ignored it and packed his suitcase.
Mingyu was happy he could go home. He missed the comfort of his own bed, of waking up in a pitch black room instead of flowy curtains dancing in the wind, forcing him awake at the slightest bit of light.
He pushed his suitcase aside and plopped on the couch, staring into the nothingness that was his home. The silence had a way of sending shivers down his spine while comforting him all the same. He wanted to cry, even though there was nothing left to give, and he wanted to throw everything in his sight and scream.
When you were around, at least the place felt a bit like home. Having moved from South Korea to the other side of the world, he’d always been out of place. Nothing seemed to settle him down, until you came along.
You made everything easy, bearable even. You showed him the balance between settling in his new hometown and honoring where he came from. When he talked about his career, you’d asked him questions that no one had ever thought of before, as if you desired to dig a layer deeper.
And you succeeded. Since the day you went out for Korean barbecue together, you’d stayed around.
Mingyu had never loved someone like you, let alone someone in the way he loved you. You were his voice of reason, his moment of chaos when he needed it. You were stability, spontaneity and structure all combined into one, an endless balance that you were keeping like it was breathing. You settled into his hectic and fast-paced lifestyle much easier than he expected you to.
He started loving you even deeper.
Coming home became something he looked forward to. His apartment was bright and lively, no matter if you were there to greet him or not. He could faintly trace your jasmine and coconut perfume, the warmth starting in his stomach before spreading through his whole body.
All he smelled now was lavender. The cleaning service had been in not too long ago, but his apartment was hollow. It rather felt like he was sitting in the home of someone else.
Mingyu’s entire world had fallen apart.
He checked his phone. Maybe you’d called him back, even if it was to tell him off. Your phone went straight to voicemail and where he usually hung up, he stuck around.
He just needed to hear your voice.
“Hi, baby,” he said softly. “I just… I want to talk to you. About all of this. I know that you want space, but it’s killing me to sit here without knowing what’s going to happen.”
The tears stung behind his eyes, the pressure in his chest unbearable. “All I want to know is if this is the end or not, okay? I don’t want to get my hopes up for nothing.”
He sniffled and whispered a soft goodbye before he threw the phone down next to him.
When his coach came over to prepare his meals with him, he just stared into the abyss. Whether he willfully ignored it or he genuinely didn’t notice, Mingyu couldn’t bring himself to care. All he wanted was you to call him back so he could start letting you go.
Because if you wanted it to be over, he had no choice but to accept it.
After one bite, Mingyu curled himself up on the couch. He closed his eyes, but all he saw was you. Screaming at him, embracing him, crying, running your hands through his hair, kissing him, screaming again.
Nothing he did relieved him of his fear becoming reality.
He glanced at his phone, but you hadn’t called him back. Mingyu was going to have to take matters into his own hands and it would either be the best decision he would ever make, or you would hate him forever.
He slid into his shoes, grabbed his phone and keys and got into his car. It was a small drive to the town over, but every second passing felt like you were slipping away from him further. His knuckles were white by the time he reached your block, his heart about to race itself to death.
It was all or nothing.
Mingyu got out of the car and walked up to the stairs. He looked up and started walking, all three sets until he reached your level. Right at the end of the gallery was your apartment, the crate with empty beer bottles stacked next to your front door.
With every step he took, his legs became heavier.
What was he doing? You clearly told him you needed space and he breached that trust by barging into your block unannounced. You would never forgive him for it, now that he was willing to cross every boundary you were going to set with him in the future.
But it’d been over a month since you left the hotel without a word. He wanted to know how you felt, and at some point the line between protecting your peace and avoiding the confrontation started to blur. Mingyu was going to have to barge through it himself.
He knocked on the door and stepped back, rubbing his fingers together. When the door opened, he tilted his head.
“Hey,” Jeonghan greeted him and looked back.
Mingyu looked past your best friend at you. He swallowed when your eyes glimmered. “Sorry for coming over so suddenly, but I couldn’t take it anymore.”
You nodded and wiped your cheeks. “Come in.”
He stepped in and nodded at Jeonghan. “Thank you.”
“Yeah, no problem.”
Mingyu lingered near the door and cleared his throat. “I–”
You embraced him tightly.
He wrapped his arms around you and nuzzled his face in your hair.
“We can talk in a second,” you sniffled. “I need a hug first.”
Mingyu squeezed his eyes shut, but a tear rolled down his cheek. “Me too, baby,” he whispered. He held you close, taking you in like it was the last time he would ever see you again.
He’d convinced himself it was until you ran into his arms.
Jeonghan smiled at you when you pulled back. “Call me if you need me, yeah?”
You nodded and wiped your tears away.
He looked at Mingyu and nodded, to which he returned the favour.
Mingyu turned to you and wiped your cheek with his thumb. “The situation’s been shitty, for both of us but mostly for you.”
“I wished it would’ve worked out how we hoped it would.” You smiled through your tears. “I didn’t want to stand in the way of your career.”
He grabbed both of your hands and squeezed them. “I know that I’m not always the best at juggling my personal life and my work, but you are never in the way.”
“If this would be the outcome, I never would’ve done it,” you said with a sniffle. “It was the easy way out instead of addressing the elephant in the room.”
Mingyu lowered his eyes and nodded. “Yeah.”
You led him to the couch leaned forward. “How are you truly doing, Mingyu?”
“I was on such a high after last season,” he started and smiled. “I came in third in the championship, and there was such hope that this year could be even better. I won a ton of races after all.”
You listened intently, your eyes scanning every detail of his face and your brows pushed together.
“When I walked into the factory to see the car and to test it, my hopes were completely gone and the season hadn’t even started yet.” Mingyu sighed deeply. “And how could I tell anyway? It was only February, a month and a half before the first face.”
“Were you scared to admit it?”
He nodded. “I started acting out because I was terrified that I would fail, and look where that has brought me. I fulfilled my own destiny.”
You nodded and leaned on your thighs. “And what could I have done differently to give you the space to be open about that?”
Mingyu opened his mouth, but he closed it again. “Baby, this is not your responsibility. I should’ve been honest.”
“But you weren’t, so I’ll ask again.” You looked right at him. “What could I have done differently so you would’ve felt comfortable?”
He lowered his eyes.
“Mingyu,” you grabbed his hand, “you need to be honest with me if we want to work through this.”
“You have a tendency to want to solve everything,” he heard himself say. At your lack of reaction, he looked up.
Your head was tilted, your eyes narrowed. After a silence, you clicked your tongue.
“I mean, you kind of proved me right already.”
Mingyu managed a small smile. “I admire your ability to think about solutions, but what I need sometimes is an ear, not a brain. And maybe, when you suggested that we would pretend nothing was happening, that was not what was best for us even though it was the logical solution so the press wouldn’t jump to conclusions.”
You nodded. “I agree with you.”
He shuffled closer and rubbed your thigh. “You need to allow yourself to take a breather more. What you did, taking your distance – even though it was suddenly – was a good thing.”
“It didn’t feel that way,” you muttered with a sigh. “I hated to leave you hanging like that, and I guess in hindsight that I was also kind of running from it. In case you hated me or something.”
“You and me both.” Mingyu caressed your cheek with a smile. “We should stop pretending, but I hope the act can be dropped completely. I don’t want to fight anymore.”
You wrapped your arms around his neck and buried your head in the crook of his neck. “You’ll talk, and I’ll listen, or am I too early to propose a solution?”
Mingyu laughed and pressed a kiss to your temple. “Sounds like a perfect idea.”
You fell asleep in his arms that night and Mingyu’s world was slowly built back up. His career might’ve not been what it needed to be, but he had you and that was all that mattered.
[insert divider here]
The press described it as the most anticipated return of the season, you would tell them that it had been coming all along.
Mingyu’s first win of the season came right before the summer break, when an unexpected crash between the front row gave way to the lead. Jun was right behind him, grinding the rest of the field to a halt so they could secure their 1-2 podium finish.
An entirely different person came out of the summer break, with you by his side. You fell in love with Mingyu all over again.
You’d joined for the last race of the season, tucked away in the paddock as you watched the screen. Mingyu was in second place and if he stayed there, he could round up the top three for the season. Jun had already been declared world champion, but he was leading the race anyway.
With the cord entangled in your hand, your fingers were crossed as Mingyu was told to come in for a last pitstop. He had a gap big enough to keep the position, but the pitstop had to go right.
As the car pulled up in the lane, the pit box pulsed. Your heart hammered in your chest as you watched the mechanics in their rehearsed rhythm, as if it was their second nature. All four tyres at once, switching from hard to mediums.
Within the blink of an eye, Mingyu took off.
You watched the screen, just when Mingyu entered the race track. His opponent was nowhere in sight.
As the pit box cheered, you released a soft breath of relief. All Mingyu had to do was hold out and he would come in third again.
When the last lap rang in, the team was already guiding you through the crowd. They put you right at the front of the barrier, next to his strategist. You were nearly pushed against the barrier, the team buzzing with excitement as their drivers were nearing the finish line. Some of the mechanics were climbing in the fences to cheer at them, even though that wasn’t allowed anymore.
The team did not seem to care.
The car with number 17 disappeared on the horizon and your heart skipped a beat. It stopped in front of the big banner with second place on it and Mingyu didn’t know how fast he had to get out.
The warmth spread through your chest when he stood on the hood of his car, pumping his fists in the air while the crowd roared. He jumped off and rushed into the arms of his mechanics, who nearly dragged him over the barrier.
“Crazy, those guys,” his strategist said to you, to which you chuckled.
Mingyu took his helmet off and turned your way, his lips twisting into a smile. He pressed your foreheads together, his chest rising and falling heavily.
“I think a night out is in order,” you whispered with a smile.
“We’ll think about that later.” He pressed your lips together in a kiss so eagerly that your knees buckled. You held onto his suit for stability and smiled against his lips.
Mingyu caressed your cheek and smiled. “I couldn’t have done it without you, baby. Thank you for everything.”
“Everything for you.” You turned him around gently. “Now, go celebrate that podium and suck in all the love and praise. I’ll be downstairs waiting for you.”
He walked away and looked over his shoulder.
“Don’t forget you love me, though.”
He smiled and disappeared inside. The rest of the day became a blur as the alcohol passed around the team, but you didn’t care. All that mattered to you was that you and Mingyu were happy again.
summary: With a bad start of the season, you and Mingyu try to save your relationship from falling apart.
wc: 6,059
rating: sfw
tags: non-idol au, f1 au, established relationship, tension, on the verge of a break-up, kind of a second chance fic, fluff, pda at the end
a/n: won't confirm nor deny this is inspired by mingyu's costume being that fuck ass main character from that f1 movie. anyway enjoy! and thanks to @livmarauder for helping me out with the fic because tunnel vision is real guys. check out her work, she's AMAZING <3 and another special thanks to mingyu expert @jakedustry for proofreading for me. she's so cool and you should check out her amazing works as well!
currently listening to: don't forget you love me - calum hood
SEVENTEEN M.LIST ✦ SIGN UP FOR MY TAGLIST HERE! ✦ ORBIT MAP
You were a bystander of Mingyu’s bad season.
After ending in third place the previous one, there were high hopes. Mingyu’s name had even come up when talking about possible contenders. You remembered how proud he was of the new car, and how the new regulations would only bend the rules in his favour.
In Australia, his car gave out in the middle of the race and he was forced to retire. In the moment, you’d thought nothing of it, just continuing your role of being his biggest support. ‘Just one bad start. It doesn’t mean that he’s out completely,’ commentators all around the world had declared. You had grounded yourself in that as well, and the next race, he managed to score a point despite the struggles he had with the car.
When he DNF’ed again and his teammate went with him, heads started to turn.
Not only did it put the pressure on the team to explain the possible causes, but Mingyu was reminded of his own words before the start of the season. He danced around it with curated precision, but made sure that the media were satisfied with his answer. Just like he practiced with his press officer.
The answers he would give when he talked about you were no different.
The media wouldn’t notice how his eyes clouded over, how he struggled to keep his shoulders straight and his smile on, as long as he kept saying the right words. Cherry-picking and feeding them to a group of people that had the power to twist them, but they never did.
Mingyu always knew what to say, even in moments where there were no words left.
You put the headphones down softly when the call came. The words hung in the air, suffocating all the people that were watching in the pit box with you. Your heart burned behind your ribcage. From the corner of your eye, people were shooting looks of sympathy, but you couldn’t focus on anything else than the pitlane.
The air punched out of your lungs when Mingyu’s car was pushed inside. His white helmet with blue accents and the number 17 stuck out just above the car. He put the steering wheel on the front of the car alongside with the headrest, pulling himself up on the halo.
The room pulsed as he took off his helmet, as if they were bracing themselves for a storm to come. Mingyu turned to you, his eyes scanning every inch of you. He walked up to you and stopped.
You swallowed and played with your bracelet, but he pulled you into a hug. Your shoulders tensed before you relaxed in his arms, managing a weak smile. “Are you okay?”
“Fine,” he mumbled in your neck. “It’s whatever.”
You hummed and rubbed his back in small circle motions, but Mingyu broke free. He shot you a last look before walking away. As per usual, you left the pit box to go with him. You trailed next to him, taking two steps for every one he took. You laced your fingers together and he accepted your affection. He broke away when he took interviews, joining forces with his press officer.
You watched from the sidelines as he gave the performance that he was trained for, as if this was just a small setback in his path to becoming world champion.
Mingyu’s energy was contagious, and he never left the room without any. He was charming, accessible and easy to love. Compared to how he behaved when he was in the paddock, there wasn’t a difference between your boyfriend and the man that drove one of the fastest cars in the world.
You still felt your heart skipping a beat, admiring how easily he could pull himself together and find the words without even hinting that he was frustrated with his performance, that he beat himself up for not pulling the weight and showing the results that he promised everyone.
He was a breath of fresh air.
You joined him again and walked to the pit box. His press officer waited outside his motorhome while you followed Mingyu inside. His hand rested on the small of your back when you stepped in. You pushed it away when the door closed behind you and walked to the couch.
“I’m going to take a shower,” Mingyu announced, but you didn’t respond. He scoffed and slammed the door shut.
You wondered if anyone had ever pinched through your act, even though there was nothing to prove that you weren’t on good terms. You always showed up together, holding hands, chatting and there was never a moment where your words – if someone ever approached you – were weighed carefully. Mingyu treated you like the world was your palace. That was the happy couple they’d been seeing for three years, ever since your relationship became public.
You couldn’t remember the last time you were happy with Mingyu.
The running water made you close your eyes, as if it was only you that existed. You liked it like that, when there was nobody around you for a couple of seconds. Since your relationship became public, you’d been in the spotlight. You chose to keep your life private regardless and Mingyu had always respected that.
Out of protection towards you, Mingyu’s current performance and the crumbs of your relationship that were left, all the energy you had went into pretending that everything was fine. Existing out of everyone’s eyes became your safe haven in moments where nothing could come to your aid.
You peeked an eye open when the door opened and lifted your head.
Mingyu hoisted himself into a fresh team shirt, a pair of jeans desperately clinging to his hips. He crinkled his nose and pulled his jeans up, tucking his shirt in. “Are you coming back to the pit box to watch the rest of the race?”
“Do I have a choice?” You bit back.
“I’m not in the race anymore, so yes, actually,” he answered calmly and finally looked up. His eyes were like a silent plea every time he looked at you. “Let me rephrase it. Will you be there for emotional support?”
You got off the couch with a scoff and followed him outside. You latched onto his bicep and leaned into him, your fingertips prickling as your nails dug into the fabric of his shirt.
He pulled you in closer and leaned in. “Don’t forget you love me.”
You smiled at him sweetly. “You’re very sure that I do.”
Mingyu looked ahead of him, his arm tense. When you got back into the pit box, he pressed a kiss to your lips before you parted ways. He walked to the pitwall, where he joined the strategists and team principal, and you stood behind the barrier with your headphones.
The rest of the race was a blur. You stared holes into Mingyu’s back, trying to guess what was going through his head. Secretly, you hoped that he was thinking about you, but those days had long passed. Whenever he thought of you, you knew that it bore resentment. He couldn’t look at you with anything else. Everything in front of the cameras was pretense.
You went back to his motorhome as Mingyu joined his team in celebrating the podium. You didn’t care how long it would take him. Hell, you didn’t care if he wouldn’t return at all. Everywhere Mingyu went, cameras followed and you did enough pretending for one day.
As you curled up on the couch, the door opened. The anger ached in your chest immediately, and you clutched your phone in your hand. You stared out of the window as a weight settled down next to you.
The scent of cedar and citrus coated you in a thick blanket of comfort, no matter how much you didn’t want it to. Fighting only made it easier to lose yourself in it, so you let it. For a while you sat in silence, as if you were both stubbornly waiting for the other to speak. The pressure on your chest made you suffocate.
“I’m going back to the hotel,” Mingyu finally said.
You looked at him blankly.
“You can choose to come with me, or you can stay behind and someone will come pick you up later.”
“But?” You countered.
Mingyu shot you a weak smile. “You know what I’m going to say.”
You looked out of the window again and crossed your arms.
He called your name softly. His hand slid to your thigh, burning up against your skin. When you pushed it away, he swallowed and shot you a small smile. “I get that this is not ideal–”
“Not ideal?” You interrupted, chuckling bitterly. “God, Mingyu, you have a lot of nerve to phrase it like that.”
“Baby–”
“Not ideal is when you accidentally double booked yourself. This,” you pointed your finger between him and you, “all of the pretending and the cameras, this is exhausting and demoralising and I’m losing hope that it will ever be fixed.”
Mingyu’s eyes widened, glimmering. He looked away and lowered his head. “I see,” he croaked. “I’m sorry.”
You got off the couch and grabbed your purse. “We’re going back to the hotel. I can’t do this, not here.”
But back at the hotel, you didn’t circle back to it. You were too tired to argue about it again, knowing that it wouldn’t fix anything. All Mingyu would tell you was that you had to hold out. It was only temporary and would blow over before you knew, but it’d been going on for months. Nothing was addressed and if anything, it was only getting worse.
Although, you doubted that talking about it would fix anything at that point.
You skipped dinner with Mingyu and ordered room service, munching on a fry as you stared into nothingness. The afternoon replayed in your head, nothing special since your little play, but it hadn’t cut a wound like usual, where you were left bleeding for days until you could look Mingyu in the eyes normally.
As your eyes flicked to your plate, your phone rang. Mingyu’s caller ID usually made your heart skip a beat, but all you could do was stare at it blankly. Hearing his voice would flush your chest with warmth, and you would think to yourself how lucky you were with a man like him by your side.
After enduring the past two months, you were hollowed out.
You put the empty plate aside and threw the suitcase on your bed. You snatched the clothes off the chair and folded them. From the bathroom, you grabbed your toiletries and put them back in the bag. Your summer dress was replaced by a shirt and sweatpants and you did your hair the way you usually would.
And before you knew it, you were on the plane back home.
You cried yourself to sleep one night, but slept like an angel the next. Some days, Mingyu was on your mind and you couldn’t focus on anything and others he was merely an afterthought. On those weekends, you watched the races from the comfort of your own home.
Sometimes you couldn’t even stomach the thought without bursting into tears.
Mingyu had tried talking to you on multiple occasions, but you told him you needed space. You couldn’t be around him, not like this, and your absence was noticed.
Like always, his words had landed with curated precision. He laughed, telling the camera that you were in a busy period with work. ‘The money doesn’t come from nowhere’, he’d teased.
Your eyes stung with tears as you cursed underneath your breath. You turned the TV off and plopped on the couch, staring into the nothingness.
Every time you saw him, flashing his canines at the camera mischievously, you were reminded of the times you were the one at the receiving end. Mingyu was one of the few people who could genuinely make you laugh. You hated your loud cackles, but Mingyu did everything in his power to pull them out of you.
That was his victory smile, as he came to call it.
You buried your head in your hands and sobbed all of the tears you’d been suppressing until you were a shell. Until there was nothing left for you to give anymore.
When you started dating Mingyu, you knew what you were getting yourself into. You didn’t care because you loved him. He valued your need for privacy and admired your courage to make it public anyway. You never had a knack for hiding; all you wanted was to show the world that you cared about him, that you supported him every step of the way.
Sometimes you wished that someone would actually catch you in the act. At least you could drop it that way.
A knock on the door interrupted the spiral. You dragged yourself towards the door and wiped your cheeks dry before opening the door.
Jeonghan took one look at you before he shot you a small smile. “I had a feeling I would see you like this.”
The tears flowed as if the past twenty minutes hadn’t even happened. You crashed into your best friend’s arms, burying your head in his chest.
He silently embraced you and rested his head on top of yours. “Your mother told me you were hiding out in your apartment,” he muttered. “I had to check on you.”
Deep down, you were glad she did.
Jeonghan sat you back down on the couch and walked to your kitchen. He came back with two cups of tea and took a seat next to you.
“I reached the final straw a couple of weeks ago,” you croaked. “Mingyu had another DNF and for some reason, I just couldn’t take it anymore. I just…” You paused and lowered your head. “I don’t know what happened.”
He observed you in silence, his hands wrapped around the cup. “What’s on your mind?”
Your eyes darted to him.
Jeonghan shot you a small smile in response.
“I guess I feel a little selfish for leaving so suddenly, and maybe I’m also wondering why I didn’t just back off entirely instead.” You rubbed your face with a sigh and threw yourself back in the cushions. Staring at the ceiling, the tears stung behind your eyes. “I could’ve spared myself the trouble, stayed home and taken my time and distance. Instead I was the one suggesting to go down this route.”
You glanced at your best friend. “Please don’t tell me I should stop beating myself up.”
He chuckled. “As if I would.”
You managed a small smile yourself and looked back up at the ceiling.
“I think it’s admirable that you wanted to try.”
Your head shot his way.
Jeonghan shrugged weakly. “You don’t know if it’s going to work, and I can empathise with the fact you held hope that it would, but have you ever talked about it?”
“Plenty of times,” you answered. “It just always ended in a fight and led to nowhere. We would both feel misunderstood by the other. It was the same conversation where we still hoped for a different outcome, but it never came.”
You shrugged. “I think we were way past the point of talking.”
He shuffled closer to you and put his cup down. “Would you like me to give some advice, or would you just like some company? I can tell that this conversation has been replaying in your head since you left.”
You looked at him and reached out, your fingers gently brushing his arm. “Just having you here is enough for now. Maybe when I’m in a better mood, I want some advice.”
Jeonghan slapped his thighs and got up. “Alright, then we’re ordering sushi and I’ll get us my best bottle of wine. It’s been too long since we had a proper night with just the two of us.”
You watched how he marched out of your apartment with a smile on your face, ignoring how your phone lit up. Jeonghan was right; it had been too long since you had a night together.
You grabbed your phone from the coffee table and turned it off. Mingyu would hear from you another time.
Jeonghan had left the subject alone as well, instead updating you on his personal life and the stunts his coworkers were pulling. You tried digging into his romantic endeavours, but he danced around the subject so smoothly, you knew that he was hiding something. Not wanting to pry, you left it alone.
Although, with enough alcohol in his system he would probably confess. You would let the trajectory of the night decide.
You were digesting the sushi, slouched on the couch while Jeonghan was browsing through your watchlist on Netflix. He commented on every sappy movie, pausing when he saw shows you’d watched a thousand times before, until he eventually gave up.
“You watch boring stuff,” he declared and threw the remote on the couch.
“Half of the suggestions aren’t even because of me,” you countered. “Mingyu wants to watch those sappy movies ninety percent of the time. I don’t even know why.”
“Probably because when you cry, he can comfort you.”
You snorted. “It’s rather the other way around. I always end up wiping his tears away.”
Jeonghan frowned. “Is he such a crybaby?”
“When he’s watching the Notebook, yes.”
He bobbed his head and clicked his tongue. “Well, you learn something new every day.”
You hummed and stared at the black screen.
“Do you miss him?”
“Yeah,” you whispered and sniffled. “I miss him so much.”
Jeonghan placed your head on his shoulder and rubbed your shoulder. “Maybe you’re not completely beyond the point of talking,” he said softly. “You just need to be honest with him, and with yourself.”
You closed your eyes and nodded. “Having such a high-demanding job is hard, especially when the public eye is involved and I’m afraid.” Your voice trembled. “I’m so afraid of losing him right now when the whole world is watching…”
“Which is why I admire your choice to keep showing up anyway. I hope Mingyu hasn’t forgotten what that means.”
There was a knock on your door and by the time Jeonghan opened it, you were too exhausted to fight the tears.
No race win could make up for what you had left behind the day you flew back home.
The looks Mingyu received every time he walked into the paddock had become more concerning every time, and he wondered if the press started putting two and two together throughout all his chirpy and charming demeanour. It hadn’t reflected in his performance the first two races, but when he crashed the car the next thinking about your fight, heads started to turn.
At night, all he thought about was you. The day you left replayed in his head and he kept searching for every single detail that could’ve helped him prevent you from going. He knew that it wasn’t just that day, or that it was just a small fight.
You had all the reason to leave. In fact, he’d braced himself for the day you would go, but it didn’t lessen the blow. He cried himself to sleep and the moment he landed into the new race week, he locked himself in his hotel. He only came out when he needed to and through all of it, he was expected to smile, to tell everyone how well he was going to do that weekend.
He was going to have to talk about you.
Press had made teasing remarks about your absence, slicing his heart in such an ignorant way that it made his skin prickle. He remembered laughing, telling them that the money didn’t come from nowhere and he moved on from the conversation just like that.
Mingyu met up with his strategists to discuss the race. The expected rain could be his saving grace if he knew how to utilise it, but expected was all it was. If it was just a normal race, he had to revert to medium and hard tyres to hold out. The softs under his car wouldn’t last even a lap, not on this track.
His teammate, Jun, was prioritised when it came to maximising the amount of points they could get that weekend. The prediction – for the first time since the finale of the previous season – was a double podium. For Jun, that meant a race win.
Mingyu’s job was to make sure to stay close behind his favoured teammate, holding up opponents so the gap between them became impossible to close. There hadn’t been a race win in the cards for him, and the championship that he promised to deliver started slipping out of his hands as well.
Jun had sat with him during lunch, but stayed uncharacteristically silent.
In between bites, it got on Mingyu’s nerves. “You can just speak your mind, you know,” he said tightly. “I’m well aware that I haven’t been delivering on my promises so just say what you want to say. No hard feelings from my side.”
“I was going to ask if you were okay.”
The force he felt in his gut was more than deserved.
Mingyu managed a soft ‘Oh’.
“I know this world is hard and we’re being measured by everything we do and say, but I hope you feel comfortable enough around me to share what’s been going on.” Jun offered him a smile. “We may be rivals on track, but I consider you a friend.”
He inhaled softly. “I’ll manage, but thank you anyway.”
Jun nodded and turned back to his food. “You’ll get there, I’m sure of it. One down period shouldn’t define the rest of your trajectory.”
Mingyu still debated whether he meant his career or his personal life, the words echoing in the back of his mind throughout the day.
The weekend flew by and he even managed to cling onto third place, but he didn’t stay to celebrate the double podium. In the hotel room, it all came crashing down on him again and somewhere between hours of crying and trying to call you, he’d fallen asleep.
Jun had texted him, but he ignored it and packed his suitcase.
Mingyu was happy he could go home. He missed the comfort of his own bed, of waking up in a pitch black room instead of flowy curtains dancing in the wind, forcing him awake at the slightest bit of light.
He pushed his suitcase aside and plopped on the couch, staring into the nothingness that was his home. The silence had a way of sending shivers down his spine while comforting him all the same. He wanted to cry, even though there was nothing left to give, and he wanted to throw everything in his sight and scream.
When you were around, at least the place felt a bit like home. Having moved from South Korea to the other side of the world, he’d always been out of place. Nothing seemed to settle him down, until you came along.
You made everything easy, bearable even. You showed him the balance between settling in his new hometown and honoring where he came from. When he talked about his career, you’d asked him questions that no one had ever thought of before, as if you desired to dig a layer deeper.
And you succeeded. Since the day you went out for Korean barbecue together, you’d stayed around.
Mingyu had never loved someone like you, let alone someone in the way he loved you. You were his voice of reason, his moment of chaos when he needed it. You were stability, spontaneity and structure all combined into one, an endless balance that you were keeping like it was breathing. You settled into his hectic and fast-paced lifestyle much easier than he expected you to.
He started loving you even deeper.
Coming home became something he looked forward to. His apartment was bright and lively, no matter if you were there to greet him or not. He could faintly trace your jasmine and coconut perfume, the warmth starting in his stomach before spreading through his whole body.
All he smelled now was lavender. The cleaning service had been in not too long ago, but his apartment was hollow. It rather felt like he was sitting in the home of someone else.
Mingyu’s entire world had fallen apart.
He checked his phone. Maybe you’d called him back, even if it was to tell him off. Your phone went straight to voicemail and where he usually hung up, he stuck around.
He just needed to hear your voice.
“Hi, baby,” he said softly. “I just… I want to talk to you. About all of this. I know that you want space, but it’s killing me to sit here without knowing what’s going to happen.”
The tears stung behind his eyes, the pressure in his chest unbearable. “All I want to know is if this is the end or not, okay? I don’t want to get my hopes up for nothing.”
He sniffled and whispered a soft goodbye before he threw the phone down next to him.
When his coach came over to prepare his meals with him, he just stared into the abyss. Whether he willfully ignored it or he genuinely didn’t notice, Mingyu couldn’t bring himself to care. All he wanted was you to call him back so he could start letting you go.
Because if you wanted it to be over, he had no choice but to accept it.
After one bite, Mingyu curled himself up on the couch. He closed his eyes, but all he saw was you. Screaming at him, embracing him, crying, running your hands through his hair, kissing him, screaming again.
Nothing he did relieved him of his fear becoming reality.
He glanced at his phone, but you hadn’t called him back. Mingyu was going to have to take matters into his own hands and it would either be the best decision he would ever make, or you would hate him forever.
He slid into his shoes, grabbed his phone and keys and got into his car. It was a small drive to the town over, but every second passing felt like you were slipping away from him further. His knuckles were white by the time he reached your block, his heart about to race itself to death.
It was all or nothing.
Mingyu got out of the car and walked up to the stairs. He looked up and started walking, all three sets until he reached your level. Right at the end of the gallery was your apartment, the crate with empty beer bottles stacked next to your front door.
With every step he took, his legs became heavier.
What was he doing? You clearly told him you needed space and he breached that trust by barging into your block unannounced. You would never forgive him for it, now that he was willing to cross every boundary you were going to set with him in the future.
But it’d been over a month since you left the hotel without a word. He wanted to know how you felt, and at some point the line between protecting your peace and avoiding the confrontation started to blur. Mingyu was going to have to barge through it himself.
He knocked on the door and stepped back, rubbing his fingers together. When the door opened, he tilted his head.
“Hey,” Jeonghan greeted him and looked back.
Mingyu looked past your best friend at you. He swallowed when your eyes glimmered. “Sorry for coming over so suddenly, but I couldn’t take it anymore.”
You nodded and wiped your cheeks. “Come in.”
He stepped in and nodded at Jeonghan. “Thank you.”
“Yeah, no problem.”
Mingyu lingered near the door and cleared his throat. “I–”
You embraced him tightly.
He wrapped his arms around you and nuzzled his face in your hair.
“We can talk in a second,” you sniffled. “I need a hug first.”
Mingyu squeezed his eyes shut, but a tear rolled down his cheek. “Me too, baby,” he whispered. He held you close, taking you in like it was the last time he would ever see you again.
He’d convinced himself it was until you ran into his arms.
Jeonghan smiled at you when you pulled back. “Call me if you need me, yeah?”
You nodded and wiped your tears away.
He looked at Mingyu and nodded, to which he returned the favour.
Mingyu turned to you and wiped your cheek with his thumb. “The situation’s been shitty, for both of us but mostly for you.”
“I wished it would’ve worked out how we hoped it would.” You smiled through your tears. “I didn’t want to stand in the way of your career.”
He grabbed both of your hands and squeezed them. “I know that I’m not always the best at juggling my personal life and my work, but you are never in the way.”
“If this would be the outcome, I never would’ve done it,” you said with a sniffle. “It was the easy way out instead of addressing the elephant in the room.”
Mingyu lowered his eyes and nodded. “Yeah.”
You led him to the couch leaned forward. “How are you truly doing, Mingyu?”
“I was on such a high after last season,” he started and smiled. “I came in third in the championship, and there was such hope that this year could be even better. I won a ton of races after all.”
You listened intently, your eyes scanning every detail of his face and your brows pushed together.
“When I walked into the factory to see the car and to test it, my hopes were completely gone and the season hadn’t even started yet.” Mingyu sighed deeply. “And how could I tell anyway? It was only February, a month and a half before the first face.”
“Were you scared to admit it?”
He nodded. “I started acting out because I was terrified that I would fail, and look where that has brought me. I fulfilled my own destiny.”
You nodded and leaned on your thighs. “And what could I have done differently to give you the space to be open about that?”
Mingyu opened his mouth, but he closed it again. “Baby, this is not your responsibility. I should’ve been honest.”
“But you weren’t, so I’ll ask again.” You looked right at him. “What could I have done differently so you would’ve felt comfortable?”
He lowered his eyes.
“Mingyu,” you grabbed his hand, “you need to be honest with me if we want to work through this.”
“You have a tendency to want to solve everything,” he heard himself say. At your lack of reaction, he looked up.
Your head was tilted, your eyes narrowed. After a silence, you clicked your tongue.
“I mean, you kind of proved me right already.”
Mingyu managed a small smile. “I admire your ability to think about solutions, but what I need sometimes is an ear, not a brain. And maybe, when you suggested that we would pretend nothing was happening, that was not what was best for us even though it was the logical solution so the press wouldn’t jump to conclusions.”
You nodded. “I agree with you.”
He shuffled closer and rubbed your thigh. “You need to allow yourself to take a breather more. What you did, taking your distance – even though it was suddenly – was a good thing.”
“It didn’t feel that way,” you muttered with a sigh. “I hated to leave you hanging like that, and I guess in hindsight that I was also kind of running from it. In case you hated me or something.”
“You and me both.” Mingyu caressed your cheek with a smile. “We should stop pretending, but I hope the act can be dropped completely. I don’t want to fight anymore.”
You wrapped your arms around his neck and buried your head in the crook of his neck. “You’ll talk, and I’ll listen, or am I too early to propose a solution?”
Mingyu laughed and pressed a kiss to your temple. “Sounds like a perfect idea.”
You fell asleep in his arms that night and Mingyu’s world was slowly built back up. His career might’ve not been what it needed to be, but he had you and that was all that mattered.
The press described it as the most anticipated return of the season, you would tell them that it had been coming all along.
Mingyu’s first win of the season came right before the summer break, when an unexpected crash between the front row gave way to the lead. Jun was right behind him, grinding the rest of the field to a halt so they could secure their 1-2 podium finish.
An entirely different person came out of the summer break, with you by his side. You fell in love with Mingyu all over again.
You’d joined for the last race of the season, tucked away in the paddock as you watched the screen. Mingyu was in second place and if he stayed there, he could round up the top three for the season. Jun had already been declared world champion, but he was leading the race anyway.
With the cord entangled in your hand, your fingers were crossed as Mingyu was told to come in for a last pitstop. He had a gap big enough to keep the position, but the pitstop had to go right.
As the car pulled up in the lane, the pit box pulsed. Your heart hammered in your chest as you watched the mechanics in their rehearsed rhythm, as if it was their second nature. All four tyres at once, switching from hard to mediums.
Within the blink of an eye, Mingyu took off.
You watched the screen, just when Mingyu entered the race track. His opponent was nowhere in sight.
As the pit box cheered, you released a soft breath of relief. All Mingyu had to do was hold out and he would come in third again.
When the last lap rang in, the team was already guiding you through the crowd. They put you right at the front of the barrier, next to his strategist. You were nearly pushed against the barrier, the team buzzing with excitement as their drivers were nearing the finish line. Some of the mechanics were climbing in the fences to cheer at them, even though that wasn’t allowed anymore.
The team did not seem to care.
The car with number 17 disappeared on the horizon and your heart skipped a beat. It stopped in front of the big banner with second place on it and Mingyu didn’t know how fast he had to get out.
The warmth spread through your chest when he stood on the hood of his car, pumping his fists in the air while the crowd roared. He jumped off and rushed into the arms of his mechanics, who nearly dragged him over the barrier.
“Crazy, those guys,” his strategist said to you, to which you chuckled.
Mingyu took his helmet off and turned your way, his lips twisting into a smile. He pressed your foreheads together, his chest rising and falling heavily.
“I think a night out is in order,” you whispered with a smile.
“We’ll think about that later.” He pressed your lips together in a kiss so eagerly that your knees buckled. You held onto his suit for stability and smiled against his lips.
Mingyu caressed your cheek and smiled. “I couldn’t have done it without you, baby. Thank you for everything.”
“Everything for you.” You turned him around gently. “Now, go celebrate that podium and suck in all the love and praise. I’ll be downstairs waiting for you.”
He walked away and looked over his shoulder.
“Don’t forget you love me, though.”
He smiled and disappeared inside. The rest of the day became a blur as the alcohol passed around the team, but you didn’t care. All that mattered to you was that you and Mingyu were happy again.
Welcome to K-Vanity: @gam3bo17 @seungkw1 @orbitondgtl
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summary: After a fight with your boyfriend, you visit the flower shop that he’s a regular at, although you’re not entirely sure what your purpose is. Coincidentally, the flower shop becomes the very reason you can save your relationship from falling apart
wc: 3,937
tags: non-idol au, first blooms collab, tension, first fight, first reconciliation, it’s very tense, angst with a happy ending, fluff at the ending, light pda
a/n: so excited to be sharing my fic for the first blooms collab by @svthub! make sure to check the other fics as well, you're going to have a blast <3
You had no idea what you were going to get yourself into.
Tucked away underneath an umbrella, you stared at the sign on the shop window. Minghao was always the one decorating your place with flowers, always knowing exactly what would fit the season, the scenery, even your mood.
Now you had to do it yourself because your flowers were dying in your windowsill. Minghao wouldn’t be around to save them anytime soon. You never had much with flowers, but he loved it so you let him go crazy.
And honestly? Everything he put in there was gorgeous.
The thought tightened your chest. You nearly turned around and went home crying, but you pushed through the doors anyway.
You closed your umbrella and left it in the holder with the others. The smell of fresh flowers was all around you, and you recognised the daisies that were on your right. Observing them closely, tears welled in your eyes.
A stupid argument had completely escalated. An argument that you had a thousand times before, that led to nowhere, had made everything worse. When you thought about the way you started screaming at each other, the air punched out of your lungs. You’d never seen Minghao angry before – irritated at best – but you had ticked him off so badly that the vein in his neck visibly pulsed. The entire apartment complex could hear him, even though he switched to Chinese every few sentences.
Since that night, you hadn’t seen or spoken to him anymore. That was now two weeks ago and you were in a flower shop, looking as lost as you were. You were still not sure whether you were truly there to replace your dying flowers or if you didn’t know where else to go.
Strolling past the displays, you stopped in front of a bouquet of roses.
Minghao had often talked about them. Especially the pink and white flowers had always appealed to him and you’d never been able to pinpoint why. Just like many of his preferences, the mystery had left you wanting to know more. When you asked, you expected a very specific answer, something direct and tangible.
More often than not, he told you that some things didn’t need an explanation. It was a feeling you had and it left you with more questions than answers. You wanted things figured out, while Minghao was someone who could wait and see how things would go. ‘Go with the flow’, as he would’ve told you.
His flow didn’t exactly bring him back to you yet.
You headed into the back of the shop. Lavender, something you absolutely hated no matter how many times Minghao tried to introduce it to you. The smell was overbearing and overwhelming.
You turned back around, bumping right into a guy, guessing him to be around your age. Muttering a quick apology, you stepped out of the way, but he chuckled.
“I was actually here to help you,” he said and crossed his arms behind his back. “First time here?”
“Do I look that obviously out of place?”
He flashed a smile.
You clicked your tongue. “Alright. Loud and clear.”
The guy chuckled and started walking. “The actual reason is that I haven’t seen you around here. I would recognise you if you were a regular.”
“Ah.” You trailed after him. “My… um, my boyfriend comes here often. If anyone’s the regular, it’s him.”
He looked back at you and narrowed his eyes, scanning you up and down. “Your boyfriend…”
“I think.”
Mentally you were already strangling yourself for letting it slip out, but he ignored it to your surprise. You breathed out softly and stopped when he did.
“Is he broad and muscular?”
You couldn’t help but snort before composing yourself. You shook your head. “Sorry. No, he’s not.”
“Guessing by that reaction, he’s the opposite.”
“I wouldn’t describe him as ‘broad’, no.”
An amused smile decorated the man’s face. “Longer blond hair?”
Your stomach tingled. “As of recently, yes.”
“Oh, Minghao,” he cooed and clasped his hands together. “He would be laughing in my face if I told him that you were here.”
You tilted your head with a frown.
The man took you to the front of the shop, where you were admiring the daisies earlier. He grabbed a couple of white ones out of the bucket and turned around. “Minghao always comes here to pick out flowers for your house then, I assume, and he talks about you on many occasions.”
He walked to a couple of other buckets and picked some pink flowers. “I vividly remember him telling me that you would never be found here. Look at you now!”
You blinked a couple of times. It was the first time you ever saw him, but he was spewing information like he knew you better than you knew yourself, talking like he was catching up with an old friend.
With a weak nod, you looked at the flowers in his hand. “Minghao was completely right in saying that.”
“What brings you here?”
You looked at him, opening your mouth to say something before closing it. Shrugging, you shot him a small smile. “I don’t know, to be honest. It just felt right coming here.”
He returned the smile warmly before handing you the bouquet. “You made the right choice, then.”
The bouquet had been sitting in a vase in your kitchen for days. You’d been pondering over what to say to Minghao and how you were going to approach him in the first place. It was almost three weeks ago since your last contact and you were reaching your final straw.
When you called him, you got voicemail. Expecting him to call back, you left him be until a call would never come. Slowly, the empty feeling in your chest started filling up with a burning sensation, until you had enough.
You stood in front of his door with a hammering heart. The lock clicked and he peeked his head around the corner.
Minghao seemed surprised to see you as he opened the door. “Hey, what are you doing here?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” you shrugged, pretending to think, “maybe trying to get back in touch with you so we can get this over with.”
He leaned against the door. “Okay, what do you have to say?”
“Why don’t you pick up when I try to call you?”
“Because I have a right to decline.”
Your eyes clouded over, piercing right through him.
Minghao shrugged, your name rolling off his lips so calmly, you got shivers. “You’re not even sure what you’re going to say.”
You crossed your arms and cocked your eyebrow. “I am.”
He repeated your gesture and straightened his posture. You hated that through all the anger, he still managed to make your heart skip a beat. His eyes still held a softness for you, and you know he was more than open to hear you out.
You were the one visiting him, after all.
“Well,” you started and cleared your throat, “I think it’s unfair of you to assume that I don’t know what to say.”
“Can you prove me wrong, though?” Minghao asked. “Whenever we’re arguing, you say the same thing in five different ways. And frankly, we never get it solved.”
Before you had a defence at the ready, he cut you off.
“I’m not going to do it, not like this.” Minghao offered you a small smile. “Figure out what you want first.”
“Minghao–”
He shut the door.
You stared at it, head spinning. You were angry, upset, hurt, disappointed and unable to ride out one. You wanted to pounce at the door and scream at him, but you wanted to cry in his arms all the same.
Instead you ended up back home.
The bouquet had withered by the time you decided to do something else than go to work, the rose petals that were still clinging on a faint brown. The rest of them were on the kitchen table drying up.
You shoved your hands into your pockets and walked the block, taking a left and walking straight into the city. You didn’t have a destination in mind, you just needed to catch some fresh air.
After a good month since your fight with Minghao, the flow hadn’t brought him back to you still. On the contrary, even. You had a feeling he drifted away from you if you didn’t do something soon.
In all your anger and confusion, you’d stood on his doorstep the night before. Once again, Minghao had opened the door and you even made it into his apartment. The conversation seemed to go well and you were making progress.
Until it was your turn to talk. The conversation had escalated once again and you left with the anger burning your chest to ashes. Everything that he’d said had fallen on deaf ears and you started to realise that the problem wasn’t with Minghao.
You pushed through the doors. The daisies on your right side were the first thing you smelled, a warmth wrapping around you like a comforting blanket. Since your last visit, not much had changed in their display. Some colours had been replaced or switched around to make it more appealing, but that was the biggest change you could find.
Bowing over the daisies, you inhaled.
“Look at that.”
You shot up and looked right in those mischievous eyes.
“Are you becoming a regular?” The same guy asked, arms crossed behind his back. His lips twisted into a grin. “Welcome back. I guess that you’re still a little clueless?”
“Yep.” You looked around before your eyes landed on him. “The last bouquet kind of died and I couldn’t help but feel a little guilty.”
“I expected nothing less.” He beckoned you and started walking. “You’re around more than Minghao and that says a lot. Is something going on?”
You shrugged and crossed your arms over your body. “We’re kind of on a rough patch right now.”
He hummed and stopped by the counter, leaning on it as he watched his coworker helping someone else. “I think it’s very ironic that you find yourself here of all places.”
You looked at him with a tilted head.
“You’re not someone that cares much for flowers,” the guy started. “You’re okay with Minghao decorating your house with it because he loves it, but that’s all. And now you’re in a rough patch and where are you right now? A place that he loves more than you do.”
You hummed and looked away.
“What I’m trying to say is that you’re not here without a reason, you just need to know how to return the gesture to him.”
“Have you ever considered becoming a public speaker?”
The guy laughed. “Next to being a florist, I also offer free therapy sessions. Part of the job.” His chuckles eased into a smile. “You have no idea the things I’ve seen since working here. Flowers play a bigger role in people’s lives than you might assume.”
“I get why you and Minghao get along so well,” you remarked. “It’s like hearing him speak as we’re talking right now.”
“Like attracts like.” He winked and patted the counter. “I need to look over deliveries. Take a look around and call for me if you need me.”
You nodded and watched how he slid behind the counter and disappeared in the back. Walking back to the daisies, you kneeled down. They had all kinds of colours, blending into each other so seamlessly it made you smile.
The purple ones had been in your house before. You remembered getting a promotion at work, and telling Minghao was the most exciting part of the day. That same night, you had a small bouquet, which included the purple daisies.
You’d always assumed they were purple because it was your favourite colour, but it was the only time you’d seen them. Faded to the back of your mind, passing it off as something insignificant.
As if it had never mattered at all.
With a soft sigh, you came back up. You dusted your pants off and straightened your jacket. As you turned around, you bumped into someone.
“Did I look lost again?” You remarked with a chuckle. When you looked up, Minghao was staring right back at you.
You froze.
His eyes scanned you carefully, and you couldn’t help but drown in them.
“You do look kind of lost,” he finally said. “I thought my mind was playing tricks on me when I saw you here.”
You shrugged weakly and crossed your arms over your body.
Minghao nodded at the buckets. “What were you looking at?”
Your eyes darted to the purple daisies.
“Ah,” he hummed and bowed down, picking one from the bucket. He observed it before giving it to you.
You took it carefully and held it to your chest.
“I know purple is your favourite colour.” He nodded his head at the flower. “That’s not what that daisy is about.”
You tilted your head. “What do you mean?”
Minghao placed a hand on the small of your back and guided you further into the shop. The touch was electric, lighting a flame that you thought had long died out. “Purple daisies resemble success, and admiration. When I put them in your living room, I was celebrating your promotion.”
He picked a pink flower. “Pink lilies bear the same meaning, and they were also in that same bouquet. Admiration and gratitude.”
You took the lily from him. “What flowers say ‘I’m sorry for everything, please forgive me?’”
Minghao stopped in his tracks. He looked over his shoulder.
You took a small step towards him. “I really am sorry, Hao. I don’t want you to feel undervalued, or misunderstood, and I hate myself for not realising earlier that that’s what this is all about.”
He turned around in full.
“You know,” you looked up at him with a small smile, “if I would’ve engaged earlier, be more open-minded like you’d tell me,” you nudged Minghao, making him chuckle. “I would’ve realised much sooner that it’s one of the most touching gestures someone has ever made for me. So that’s what I’ll try to do from now on.”
He smiled at you.
You caressed his cheek. “And hearing you spew these facts out like it’s breathing, it warms my heart, and it actually makes me excited to hear more.”
“I’m sorry too, my love,” Minghao muttered and leaned into your touch. “I’m very quick to jump to conclusions sometimes and it’s unfair to you especially since you need a little longer to gather your thoughts. I should’ve given you proper time and space to do so, instead of pushing the blame all on you.”
You wrapped your arms around his waist and rested your head on his chest. “We’ll work on this just fine, my love. I’m very sure of it.”
Minghao pressed a long kiss into your hair. “I love you so much, darling. So so much.”
You looked up at him and smiled. “I love you, too.”
He kissed you so eagerly that the heat pooled in your stomach. His hands gripped your waist, nails dipping into your sides like you would disappear again. When you pulled him in closer, he chuckled against your lips.
You pouted when he pulled back.
“I came here to pick up my order,” he muttered. “I need to get back to work.”
“See you tonight?” You offered, to which he smiled.
“You have a key.”
You pressed one last kiss to his lips and watched him walking to the counter. He was talking to the same guy that had taken you under his wing.
As Minghao slipped past, he squeezed your waist. “Seungkwan wants to talk to you,” he whispered and kissed your temple. He rushed out of the door and disappeared around the corner.
You looked over at Seungkwan, who waved at you. With a chuckle, you walked over to him. “What could you possibly need me for?”
“Let’s make you a bouquet for Minghao,” he said with a smile. “I’ll tell you all I need to know.”
When you walked out of the shop with the bouquet, you were light as a feather. Your stomach tingled whenever you thought of how Minghao’s eyes would light up, how he would kiss you passionately that you melted in his arms. Since your fight, you hadn’t felt so excited to see him again.
You knew that he wouldn’t get off work for another hour and set out to his house. The bouquet rested in your hand as you twisted the lock, slipping in before any of his neighbours would see you.
As you looked around, there wasn’t a flower in sight.
The empty vases were lined up on the counter on a towel. They looked dried up and you had no trouble believing they’d been there for a couple of days. Purposeless.
You grabbed the vase that Minghao painted himself, tracing the dried streaks with a smile. You filled it with water and put it in, setting the vase on the saloon table in the living room. ‘A center piece’, Minghao had often told you. You hoped that this would meet his requirements.
Minghao had texted you about dinner, opting that he would get something on his way home. You agreed with a smile.
When you heard the lock clicking not much later, your heart jumped.
You rubbed your hands together and balanced from the front to the heel of your feet.
Minghao pushed the door back into its lock with his hip, the crackling of a plastic bag following him around. When he walked into the living room, he yelped.
Covering your mouth, you suppressed a giggle. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“What are you already doing here?” His eyes darted to the bouquet on the table and his lips twisted into a smile. “That wasn’t there before.”
“Happened to come with me,” you watched him set the bag down and observe it. “Seungkwan helped me. It’s not how the professionals do it, but–”
“It’s perfect.” Minghao looked back at you and opened his arms. “Come here, you.”
You walked right into his arms, inhaling his citrus, amber scent. You closed your eyes with a hum. “I missed you a lot, Hao.”
“I you too, my love.” He ran a hand through your hair before pressing a kiss to it. “Let’s eat before dinner gets cold.”
You peeked inside the bag curiously and smiled brightly. You grabbed the servings and sat down on the ground. “You know, why Seungkwan works in a flower shop is beyond me,” you said and opened the container.
Minghao chuckled. “He’s a talker, hm?”
“He is.” You put the other one in front of your boyfriend and grabbed a spoon and a pair of chopsticks. “A good one at that, though. Very convincing.”
“He’s helped me since the first time I set foot in that place,” he started and stirred his soup. “I just moved to the city and I wanted a good bouquet for my living room.”
“The center piece,” you said in unison.
Minghao looked at you with a smile before he continued. “He knows everything there is to know and I really formed some kind of friendship with him.”
“He’s a nice guy.” The broth you sipped from was an explosion of flavours, making you groan. “God, I missed this.”
“I thought I’d treat you.”
With a smile, you spent the rest of the dinner catching up with Minghao; work, your parents, your friends. For the first time it wasn’t silent, as if your relationship had completely reinvented itself.
As Minghao was at the counter cutting the branches of the flowers, you stood behind him, your arms wrapped around him. Your head rested against his back, your eyes closed. “If you cut them at an angle, they’re able to absorb more water,” he told you. “Your beautiful bouquet will stay alive for a very long time.”
You smiled. “I worked very hard on it.” You peeked up at him. “Can I tell you about the flowers?”
His smile grew. “I would love to hear it.”
“I picked the blue orchids first,” you said and looked out of the window. “I had never seen it before, but it’s a way to express that you think of someone as beautiful in a unique way. And Seungkwan told me it’s spiritual so naturally, I had to pick it.”
“Flattered.”
You grinned at him. “You should be.”
“And then you chose red lilies,” Minghao continued, followed by a sheer cut.
“I know it looks a little odd next to the orchid, but they’re a symbol of love. I thought a red rose was too standard, so Seungkwan showed me these.”
Minghao looked back at you. “You really put a lot of thought into this, didn’t you?”
“And I’m not even finished,” you said with a small smile, the heat flushing your cheeks. “I did pick white and pink roses because they made me think of you.”
He smiled and put the bouquet back into the vase as you let go of him. “Pink is joy and appreciation.”
“And white symbolises a fresh start,” you added. You pointed at the daffodils on the side. “Just like those, moving away and transforming.”
“And pink camellias because you missed me.” Minghao bumped your hip. “Sappy.”
You chuckled and bumped him back.
He draped an arm around your shoulder and locked you into his side. “Thank you. Truly.”
You stood on your toes and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’ll do anything for you.”
You finally regretted speaking that into existence when you found yourself in the flower shop again a couple of weeks later. Your eyes darted around before you looked back at Minghao. “Seriously?”
“You claim to know so much about this now,” he answered with a shrug. “I would love to see you make a bouquet for your own apartment.”
Shooting him a sweet smile, you traced his arm. “But aren’t you sad that you can’t do it for me anymore?”
“Nope.”
“Was worth a try.” You looked around again and your eyes landed on Seungkwan. When he looked back at you, his eyes lit up.
He came over hurriedly. “You finally got her here!”
You arched an eyebrow and turned to Minghao.
“We’re here for some pieces for her apartment,” he said and placed a hand on the small of your back. “She’s going to pick them out herself, as she’s claiming to have the hang of it.”
Seungkwan bobbed his head, his upper lip curved upwards like he was impressed. He remained where we stood and smiled. “What are you looking for?”
“Something for my kitchen,” you answered and frowned. “Why does this feel like a test?”
Behind you, Minghao chuckled. He pushed you forward gently and followed you to the daisies. “I told you she would go there first.”
Seungkwan chuckled and joined you at the front of the shop. Instead of walking after him, you navigated the shop like it was your second home. With a bright smile, you walked out of the shop with the bouquet and your boyfriend back by your side.
A place that you never thought you would ever step foot in had become like a second home in an oddly beautiful way. After your fight with Minghao, that very shop had brought you back to each other like no flow could. And this time, you wouldn’t drift away from each other anymore.
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summary: After a fight with your boyfriend, you visit the flower shop that he’s a regular at, although you’re not entirely sure what your purpose is. Coincidentally, the flower shop becomes the very reason you can save your relationship from falling apart
wc: 3,937
tags: non-idol au, first blooms collab, tension, first fight, first reconciliation, it’s very tense, angst with a happy ending, fluff at the ending, light pda
a/n: so excited to be sharing my fic for the first blooms collab by @svthub! make sure to check the other fics as well, you're going to have a blast <3
You had no idea what you were going to get yourself into.
Tucked away underneath an umbrella, you stared at the sign on the shop window. Minghao was always the one decorating your place with flowers, always knowing exactly what would fit the season, the scenery, even your mood.
Now you had to do it yourself because your flowers were dying in your windowsill. Minghao wouldn’t be around to save them anytime soon. You never had much with flowers, but he loved it so you let him go crazy.
And honestly? Everything he put in there was gorgeous.
The thought tightened your chest. You nearly turned around and went home crying, but you pushed through the doors anyway.
You closed your umbrella and left it in the holder with the others. The smell of fresh flowers was all around you, and you recognised the daisies that were on your right. Observing them closely, tears welled in your eyes.
A stupid argument had completely escalated. An argument that you had a thousand times before, that led to nowhere, had made everything worse. When you thought about the way you started screaming at each other, the air punched out of your lungs. You’d never seen Minghao angry before – irritated at best – but you had ticked him off so badly that the vein in his neck visibly pulsed. The entire apartment complex could hear him, even though he switched to Chinese every few sentences.
Since that night, you hadn’t seen or spoken to him anymore. That was now two weeks ago and you were in a flower shop, looking as lost as you were. You were still not sure whether you were truly there to replace your dying flowers or if you didn’t know where else to go.
Strolling past the displays, you stopped in front of a bouquet of roses.
Minghao had often talked about them. Especially the pink and white flowers had always appealed to him and you’d never been able to pinpoint why. Just like many of his preferences, the mystery had left you wanting to know more. When you asked, you expected a very specific answer, something direct and tangible.
More often than not, he told you that some things didn’t need an explanation. It was a feeling you had and it left you with more questions than answers. You wanted things figured out, while Minghao was someone who could wait and see how things would go. ‘Go with the flow’, as he would’ve told you.
His flow didn’t exactly bring him back to you yet.
You headed into the back of the shop. Lavender, something you absolutely hated no matter how many times Minghao tried to introduce it to you. The smell was overbearing and overwhelming.
You turned back around, bumping right into a guy, guessing him to be around your age. Muttering a quick apology, you stepped out of the way, but he chuckled.
“I was actually here to help you,” he said and crossed his arms behind his back. “First time here?”
“Do I look that obviously out of place?”
He flashed a smile.
You clicked your tongue. “Alright. Loud and clear.”
The guy chuckled and started walking. “The actual reason is that I haven’t seen you around here. I would recognise you if you were a regular.”
“Ah.” You trailed after him. “My… um, my boyfriend comes here often. If anyone’s the regular, it’s him.”
He looked back at you and narrowed his eyes, scanning you up and down. “Your boyfriend…”
“I think.”
Mentally you were already strangling yourself for letting it slip out, but he ignored it to your surprise. You breathed out softly and stopped when he did.
“Is he broad and muscular?”
You couldn’t help but snort before composing yourself. You shook your head. “Sorry. No, he’s not.”
“Guessing by that reaction, he’s the opposite.”
“I wouldn’t describe him as ‘broad’, no.”
An amused smile decorated the man’s face. “Longer blond hair?”
Your stomach tingled. “As of recently, yes.”
“Oh, Minghao,” he cooed and clasped his hands together. “He would be laughing in my face if I told him that you were here.”
You tilted your head with a frown.
The man took you to the front of the shop, where you were admiring the daisies earlier. He grabbed a couple of white ones out of the bucket and turned around. “Minghao always comes here to pick out flowers for your house then, I assume, and he talks about you on many occasions.”
He walked to a couple of other buckets and picked some pink flowers. “I vividly remember him telling me that you would never be found here. Look at you now!”
You blinked a couple of times. It was the first time you ever saw him, but he was spewing information like he knew you better than you knew yourself, talking like he was catching up with an old friend.
With a weak nod, you looked at the flowers in his hand. “Minghao was completely right in saying that.”
“What brings you here?”
You looked at him, opening your mouth to say something before closing it. Shrugging, you shot him a small smile. “I don’t know, to be honest. It just felt right coming here.”
He returned the smile warmly before handing you the bouquet. “You made the right choice, then.”
The bouquet had been sitting in a vase in your kitchen for days. You’d been pondering over what to say to Minghao and how you were going to approach him in the first place. It was almost three weeks ago since your last contact and you were reaching your final straw.
When you called him, you got voicemail. Expecting him to call back, you left him be until a call would never come. Slowly, the empty feeling in your chest started filling up with a burning sensation, until you had enough.
You stood in front of his door with a hammering heart. The lock clicked and he peeked his head around the corner.
Minghao seemed surprised to see you as he opened the door. “Hey, what are you doing here?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” you shrugged, pretending to think, “maybe trying to get back in touch with you so we can get this over with.”
He leaned against the door. “Okay, what do you have to say?”
“Why don’t you pick up when I try to call you?”
“Because I have a right to decline.”
Your eyes clouded over, piercing right through him.
Minghao shrugged, your name rolling off his lips so calmly, you got shivers. “You’re not even sure what you’re going to say.”
You crossed your arms and cocked your eyebrow. “I am.”
He repeated your gesture and straightened his posture. You hated that through all the anger, he still managed to make your heart skip a beat. His eyes still held a softness for you, and you know he was more than open to hear you out.
You were the one visiting him, after all.
“Well,” you started and cleared your throat, “I think it’s unfair of you to assume that I don’t know what to say.”
“Can you prove me wrong, though?” Minghao asked. “Whenever we’re arguing, you say the same thing in five different ways. And frankly, we never get it solved.”
Before you had a defence at the ready, he cut you off.
“I’m not going to do it, not like this.” Minghao offered you a small smile. “Figure out what you want first.”
“Minghao–”
He shut the door.
You stared at it, head spinning. You were angry, upset, hurt, disappointed and unable to ride out one. You wanted to pounce at the door and scream at him, but you wanted to cry in his arms all the same.
Instead you ended up back home.
The bouquet had withered by the time you decided to do something else than go to work, the rose petals that were still clinging on a faint brown. The rest of them were on the kitchen table drying up.
You shoved your hands into your pockets and walked the block, taking a left and walking straight into the city. You didn’t have a destination in mind, you just needed to catch some fresh air.
After a good month since your fight with Minghao, the flow hadn’t brought him back to you still. On the contrary, even. You had a feeling he drifted away from you if you didn’t do something soon.
In all your anger and confusion, you’d stood on his doorstep the night before. Once again, Minghao had opened the door and you even made it into his apartment. The conversation seemed to go well and you were making progress.
Until it was your turn to talk. The conversation had escalated once again and you left with the anger burning your chest to ashes. Everything that he’d said had fallen on deaf ears and you started to realise that the problem wasn’t with Minghao.
You pushed through the doors. The daisies on your right side were the first thing you smelled, a warmth wrapping around you like a comforting blanket. Since your last visit, not much had changed in their display. Some colours had been replaced or switched around to make it more appealing, but that was the biggest change you could find.
Bowing over the daisies, you inhaled.
“Look at that.”
You shot up and looked right in those mischievous eyes.
“Are you becoming a regular?” The same guy asked, arms crossed behind his back. His lips twisted into a grin. “Welcome back. I guess that you’re still a little clueless?”
“Yep.” You looked around before your eyes landed on him. “The last bouquet kind of died and I couldn’t help but feel a little guilty.”
“I expected nothing less.” He beckoned you and started walking. “You’re around more than Minghao and that says a lot. Is something going on?”
You shrugged and crossed your arms over your body. “We’re kind of on a rough patch right now.”
He hummed and stopped by the counter, leaning on it as he watched his coworker helping someone else. “I think it’s very ironic that you find yourself here of all places.”
You looked at him with a tilted head.
“You’re not someone that cares much for flowers,” the guy started. “You’re okay with Minghao decorating your house with it because he loves it, but that’s all. And now you’re in a rough patch and where are you right now? A place that he loves more than you do.”
You hummed and looked away.
“What I’m trying to say is that you’re not here without a reason, you just need to know how to return the gesture to him.”
“Have you ever considered becoming a public speaker?”
The guy laughed. “Next to being a florist, I also offer free therapy sessions. Part of the job.” His chuckles eased into a smile. “You have no idea the things I’ve seen since working here. Flowers play a bigger role in people’s lives than you might assume.”
“I get why you and Minghao get along so well,” you remarked. “It’s like hearing him speak as we’re talking right now.”
“Like attracts like.” He winked and patted the counter. “I need to look over deliveries. Take a look around and call for me if you need me.”
You nodded and watched how he slid behind the counter and disappeared in the back. Walking back to the daisies, you kneeled down. They had all kinds of colours, blending into each other so seamlessly it made you smile.
The purple ones had been in your house before. You remembered getting a promotion at work, and telling Minghao was the most exciting part of the day. That same night, you had a small bouquet, which included the purple daisies.
You’d always assumed they were purple because it was your favourite colour, but it was the only time you’d seen them. Faded to the back of your mind, passing it off as something insignificant.
As if it had never mattered at all.
With a soft sigh, you came back up. You dusted your pants off and straightened your jacket. As you turned around, you bumped into someone.
“Did I look lost again?” You remarked with a chuckle. When you looked up, Minghao was staring right back at you.
You froze.
His eyes scanned you carefully, and you couldn’t help but drown in them.
“You do look kind of lost,” he finally said. “I thought my mind was playing tricks on me when I saw you here.”
You shrugged weakly and crossed your arms over your body.
Minghao nodded at the buckets. “What were you looking at?”
Your eyes darted to the purple daisies.
“Ah,” he hummed and bowed down, picking one from the bucket. He observed it before giving it to you.
You took it carefully and held it to your chest.
“I know purple is your favourite colour.” He nodded his head at the flower. “That’s not what that daisy is about.”
You tilted your head. “What do you mean?”
Minghao placed a hand on the small of your back and guided you further into the shop. The touch was electric, lighting a flame that you thought had long died out. “Purple daisies resemble success, and admiration. When I put them in your living room, I was celebrating your promotion.”
He picked a pink flower. “Pink lilies bear the same meaning, and they were also in that same bouquet. Admiration and gratitude.”
You took the lily from him. “What flowers say ‘I’m sorry for everything, please forgive me?’”
Minghao stopped in his tracks. He looked over his shoulder.
You took a small step towards him. “I really am sorry, Hao. I don’t want you to feel undervalued, or misunderstood, and I hate myself for not realising earlier that that’s what this is all about.”
He turned around in full.
“You know,” you looked up at him with a small smile, “if I would’ve engaged earlier, be more open-minded like you’d tell me,” you nudged Minghao, making him chuckle. “I would’ve realised much sooner that it’s one of the most touching gestures someone has ever made for me. So that’s what I’ll try to do from now on.”
He smiled at you.
You caressed his cheek. “And hearing you spew these facts out like it’s breathing, it warms my heart, and it actually makes me excited to hear more.”
“I’m sorry too, my love,” Minghao muttered and leaned into your touch. “I’m very quick to jump to conclusions sometimes and it’s unfair to you especially since you need a little longer to gather your thoughts. I should’ve given you proper time and space to do so, instead of pushing the blame all on you.”
You wrapped your arms around his waist and rested your head on his chest. “We’ll work on this just fine, my love. I’m very sure of it.”
Minghao pressed a long kiss into your hair. “I love you so much, darling. So so much.”
You looked up at him and smiled. “I love you, too.”
He kissed you so eagerly that the heat pooled in your stomach. His hands gripped your waist, nails dipping into your sides like you would disappear again. When you pulled him in closer, he chuckled against your lips.
You pouted when he pulled back.
“I came here to pick up my order,” he muttered. “I need to get back to work.”
“See you tonight?” You offered, to which he smiled.
“You have a key.”
You pressed one last kiss to his lips and watched him walking to the counter. He was talking to the same guy that had taken you under his wing.
As Minghao slipped past, he squeezed your waist. “Seungkwan wants to talk to you,” he whispered and kissed your temple. He rushed out of the door and disappeared around the corner.
You looked over at Seungkwan, who waved at you. With a chuckle, you walked over to him. “What could you possibly need me for?”
“Let’s make you a bouquet for Minghao,” he said with a smile. “I’ll tell you all I need to know.”
When you walked out of the shop with the bouquet, you were light as a feather. Your stomach tingled whenever you thought of how Minghao’s eyes would light up, how he would kiss you passionately that you melted in his arms. Since your fight, you hadn’t felt so excited to see him again.
You knew that he wouldn’t get off work for another hour and set out to his house. The bouquet rested in your hand as you twisted the lock, slipping in before any of his neighbours would see you.
As you looked around, there wasn’t a flower in sight.
The empty vases were lined up on the counter on a towel. They looked dried up and you had no trouble believing they’d been there for a couple of days. Purposeless.
You grabbed the vase that Minghao painted himself, tracing the dried streaks with a smile. You filled it with water and put it in, setting the vase on the saloon table in the living room. ‘A center piece’, Minghao had often told you. You hoped that this would meet his requirements.
Minghao had texted you about dinner, opting that he would get something on his way home. You agreed with a smile.
When you heard the lock clicking not much later, your heart jumped.
You rubbed your hands together and balanced from the front to the heel of your feet.
Minghao pushed the door back into its lock with his hip, the crackling of a plastic bag following him around. When he walked into the living room, he yelped.
Covering your mouth, you suppressed a giggle. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“What are you already doing here?” His eyes darted to the bouquet on the table and his lips twisted into a smile. “That wasn’t there before.”
“Happened to come with me,” you watched him set the bag down and observe it. “Seungkwan helped me. It’s not how the professionals do it, but–”
“It’s perfect.” Minghao looked back at you and opened his arms. “Come here, you.”
You walked right into his arms, inhaling his citrus, amber scent. You closed your eyes with a hum. “I missed you a lot, Hao.”
“I you too, my love.” He ran a hand through your hair before pressing a kiss to it. “Let’s eat before dinner gets cold.”
You peeked inside the bag curiously and smiled brightly. You grabbed the servings and sat down on the ground. “You know, why Seungkwan works in a flower shop is beyond me,” you said and opened the container.
Minghao chuckled. “He’s a talker, hm?”
“He is.” You put the other one in front of your boyfriend and grabbed a spoon and a pair of chopsticks. “A good one at that, though. Very convincing.”
“He’s helped me since the first time I set foot in that place,” he started and stirred his soup. “I just moved to the city and I wanted a good bouquet for my living room.”
“The center piece,” you said in unison.
Minghao looked at you with a smile before he continued. “He knows everything there is to know and I really formed some kind of friendship with him.”
“He’s a nice guy.” The broth you sipped from was an explosion of flavours, making you groan. “God, I missed this.”
“I thought I’d treat you.”
With a smile, you spent the rest of the dinner catching up with Minghao; work, your parents, your friends. For the first time it wasn’t silent, as if your relationship had completely reinvented itself.
As Minghao was at the counter cutting the branches of the flowers, you stood behind him, your arms wrapped around him. Your head rested against his back, your eyes closed. “If you cut them at an angle, they’re able to absorb more water,” he told you. “Your beautiful bouquet will stay alive for a very long time.”
You smiled. “I worked very hard on it.” You peeked up at him. “Can I tell you about the flowers?”
His smile grew. “I would love to hear it.”
“I picked the blue orchids first,” you said and looked out of the window. “I had never seen it before, but it’s a way to express that you think of someone as beautiful in a unique way. And Seungkwan told me it’s spiritual so naturally, I had to pick it.”
“Flattered.”
You grinned at him. “You should be.”
“And then you chose red lilies,” Minghao continued, followed by a sheer cut.
“I know it looks a little odd next to the orchid, but they’re a symbol of love. I thought a red rose was too standard, so Seungkwan showed me these.”
Minghao looked back at you. “You really put a lot of thought into this, didn’t you?”
“And I’m not even finished,” you said with a small smile, the heat flushing your cheeks. “I did pick white and pink roses because they made me think of you.”
He smiled and put the bouquet back into the vase as you let go of him. “Pink is joy and appreciation.”
“And white symbolises a fresh start,” you added. You pointed at the daffodils on the side. “Just like those, moving away and transforming.”
“And pink camellias because you missed me.” Minghao bumped your hip. “Sappy.”
You chuckled and bumped him back.
He draped an arm around your shoulder and locked you into his side. “Thank you. Truly.”
You stood on your toes and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’ll do anything for you.”
You finally regretted speaking that into existence when you found yourself in the flower shop again a couple of weeks later. Your eyes darted around before you looked back at Minghao. “Seriously?”
“You claim to know so much about this now,” he answered with a shrug. “I would love to see you make a bouquet for your own apartment.”
Shooting him a sweet smile, you traced his arm. “But aren’t you sad that you can’t do it for me anymore?”
“Nope.”
“Was worth a try.” You looked around again and your eyes landed on Seungkwan. When he looked back at you, his eyes lit up.
He came over hurriedly. “You finally got her here!”
You arched an eyebrow and turned to Minghao.
“We’re here for some pieces for her apartment,” he said and placed a hand on the small of your back. “She’s going to pick them out herself, as she’s claiming to have the hang of it.”
Seungkwan bobbed his head, his upper lip curved upwards like he was impressed. He remained where we stood and smiled. “What are you looking for?”
“Something for my kitchen,” you answered and frowned. “Why does this feel like a test?”
Behind you, Minghao chuckled. He pushed you forward gently and followed you to the daisies. “I told you she would go there first.”
Seungkwan chuckled and joined you at the front of the shop. Instead of walking after him, you navigated the shop like it was your second home. With a bright smile, you walked out of the shop with the bouquet and your boyfriend back by your side.
A place that you never thought you would ever step foot in had become like a second home in an oddly beautiful way. After your fight with Minghao, that very shop had brought you back to each other like no flow could. And this time, you wouldn’t drift away from each other anymore.
when i saw the synopsis when you told me about it for the first time, i was literally buzzing with joy and the fact that you cooked this beautiful fic up whilst you were writing the joshua fic with me is INSANEE!
i loved reading this sooooo much like its so good!
the details with the flowers and everything brings me to another level... and like boo owning a flower shop is soooo cute! i love that they vibe so well together because you write their friendship so beautifully!
also communicating through flowers is super duper cute... like i can't explain how cute it is...
kay im so proud of u and this fic is so u as well <3 i love it!!
everyone go check out kay's fic rn!! they did so well <3
summary: After a fight with your boyfriend, you visit the flower shop that he’s a regular at, although you’re not entirely sure what your purpose is. Coincidentally, the flower shop becomes the very reason you can save your relationship from falling apart
wc: 3,937
tags: non-idol au, first blooms collab, tension, first fight, first reconciliation, it’s very tense, angst with a happy ending, fluff at the ending, light pda
a/n: so excited to be sharing my fic for the first blooms collab by @svthub! make sure to check the other fics as well, you're going to have a blast <3
You had no idea what you were going to get yourself into.
Tucked away underneath an umbrella, you stared at the sign on the shop window. Minghao was always the one decorating your place with flowers, always knowing exactly what would fit the season, the scenery, even your mood.
Now you had to do it yourself because your flowers were dying in your windowsill. Minghao wouldn’t be around to save them anytime soon. You never had much with flowers, but he loved it so you let him go crazy.
And honestly? Everything he put in there was gorgeous.
The thought tightened your chest. You nearly turned around and went home crying, but you pushed through the doors anyway.
You closed your umbrella and left it in the holder with the others. The smell of fresh flowers was all around you, and you recognised the daisies that were on your right. Observing them closely, tears welled in your eyes.
A stupid argument had completely escalated. An argument that you had a thousand times before, that led to nowhere, had made everything worse. When you thought about the way you started screaming at each other, the air punched out of your lungs. You’d never seen Minghao angry before – irritated at best – but you had ticked him off so badly that the vein in his neck visibly pulsed. The entire apartment complex could hear him, even though he switched to Chinese every few sentences.
Since that night, you hadn’t seen or spoken to him anymore. That was now two weeks ago and you were in a flower shop, looking as lost as you were. You were still not sure whether you were truly there to replace your dying flowers or if you didn’t know where else to go.
Strolling past the displays, you stopped in front of a bouquet of roses.
Minghao had often talked about them. Especially the pink and white flowers had always appealed to him and you’d never been able to pinpoint why. Just like many of his preferences, the mystery had left you wanting to know more. When you asked, you expected a very specific answer, something direct and tangible.
More often than not, he told you that some things didn’t need an explanation. It was a feeling you had and it left you with more questions than answers. You wanted things figured out, while Minghao was someone who could wait and see how things would go. ‘Go with the flow’, as he would’ve told you.
His flow didn’t exactly bring him back to you yet.
You headed into the back of the shop. Lavender, something you absolutely hated no matter how many times Minghao tried to introduce it to you. The smell was overbearing and overwhelming.
You turned back around, bumping right into a guy, guessing him to be around your age. Muttering a quick apology, you stepped out of the way, but he chuckled.
“I was actually here to help you,” he said and crossed his arms behind his back. “First time here?”
“Do I look that obviously out of place?”
He flashed a smile.
You clicked your tongue. “Alright. Loud and clear.”
The guy chuckled and started walking. “The actual reason is that I haven’t seen you around here. I would recognise you if you were a regular.”
“Ah.” You trailed after him. “My… um, my boyfriend comes here often. If anyone’s the regular, it’s him.”
He looked back at you and narrowed his eyes, scanning you up and down. “Your boyfriend…”
“I think.”
Mentally you were already strangling yourself for letting it slip out, but he ignored it to your surprise. You breathed out softly and stopped when he did.
“Is he broad and muscular?”
You couldn’t help but snort before composing yourself. You shook your head. “Sorry. No, he’s not.”
“Guessing by that reaction, he’s the opposite.”
“I wouldn’t describe him as ‘broad’, no.”
An amused smile decorated the man’s face. “Longer blond hair?”
Your stomach tingled. “As of recently, yes.”
“Oh, Minghao,” he cooed and clasped his hands together. “He would be laughing in my face if I told him that you were here.”
You tilted your head with a frown.
The man took you to the front of the shop, where you were admiring the daisies earlier. He grabbed a couple of white ones out of the bucket and turned around. “Minghao always comes here to pick out flowers for your house then, I assume, and he talks about you on many occasions.”
He walked to a couple of other buckets and picked some pink flowers. “I vividly remember him telling me that you would never be found here. Look at you now!”
You blinked a couple of times. It was the first time you ever saw him, but he was spewing information like he knew you better than you knew yourself, talking like he was catching up with an old friend.
With a weak nod, you looked at the flowers in his hand. “Minghao was completely right in saying that.”
“What brings you here?”
You looked at him, opening your mouth to say something before closing it. Shrugging, you shot him a small smile. “I don’t know, to be honest. It just felt right coming here.”
He returned the smile warmly before handing you the bouquet. “You made the right choice, then.”
The bouquet had been sitting in a vase in your kitchen for days. You’d been pondering over what to say to Minghao and how you were going to approach him in the first place. It was almost three weeks ago since your last contact and you were reaching your final straw.
When you called him, you got voicemail. Expecting him to call back, you left him be until a call would never come. Slowly, the empty feeling in your chest started filling up with a burning sensation, until you had enough.
You stood in front of his door with a hammering heart. The lock clicked and he peeked his head around the corner.
Minghao seemed surprised to see you as he opened the door. “Hey, what are you doing here?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” you shrugged, pretending to think, “maybe trying to get back in touch with you so we can get this over with.”
He leaned against the door. “Okay, what do you have to say?”
“Why don’t you pick up when I try to call you?”
“Because I have a right to decline.”
Your eyes clouded over, piercing right through him.
Minghao shrugged, your name rolling off his lips so calmly, you got shivers. “You’re not even sure what you’re going to say.”
You crossed your arms and cocked your eyebrow. “I am.”
He repeated your gesture and straightened his posture. You hated that through all the anger, he still managed to make your heart skip a beat. His eyes still held a softness for you, and you know he was more than open to hear you out.
You were the one visiting him, after all.
“Well,” you started and cleared your throat, “I think it’s unfair of you to assume that I don’t know what to say.”
“Can you prove me wrong, though?” Minghao asked. “Whenever we’re arguing, you say the same thing in five different ways. And frankly, we never get it solved.”
Before you had a defence at the ready, he cut you off.
“I’m not going to do it, not like this.” Minghao offered you a small smile. “Figure out what you want first.”
“Minghao–”
He shut the door.
You stared at it, head spinning. You were angry, upset, hurt, disappointed and unable to ride out one. You wanted to pounce at the door and scream at him, but you wanted to cry in his arms all the same.
Instead you ended up back home.
The bouquet had withered by the time you decided to do something else than go to work, the rose petals that were still clinging on a faint brown. The rest of them were on the kitchen table drying up.
You shoved your hands into your pockets and walked the block, taking a left and walking straight into the city. You didn’t have a destination in mind, you just needed to catch some fresh air.
After a good month since your fight with Minghao, the flow hadn’t brought him back to you still. On the contrary, even. You had a feeling he drifted away from you if you didn’t do something soon.
In all your anger and confusion, you’d stood on his doorstep the night before. Once again, Minghao had opened the door and you even made it into his apartment. The conversation seemed to go well and you were making progress.
Until it was your turn to talk. The conversation had escalated once again and you left with the anger burning your chest to ashes. Everything that he’d said had fallen on deaf ears and you started to realise that the problem wasn’t with Minghao.
You pushed through the doors. The daisies on your right side were the first thing you smelled, a warmth wrapping around you like a comforting blanket. Since your last visit, not much had changed in their display. Some colours had been replaced or switched around to make it more appealing, but that was the biggest change you could find.
Bowing over the daisies, you inhaled.
“Look at that.”
You shot up and looked right in those mischievous eyes.
“Are you becoming a regular?” The same guy asked, arms crossed behind his back. His lips twisted into a grin. “Welcome back. I guess that you’re still a little clueless?”
“Yep.” You looked around before your eyes landed on him. “The last bouquet kind of died and I couldn’t help but feel a little guilty.”
“I expected nothing less.” He beckoned you and started walking. “You’re around more than Minghao and that says a lot. Is something going on?”
You shrugged and crossed your arms over your body. “We’re kind of on a rough patch right now.”
He hummed and stopped by the counter, leaning on it as he watched his coworker helping someone else. “I think it’s very ironic that you find yourself here of all places.”
You looked at him with a tilted head.
“You’re not someone that cares much for flowers,” the guy started. “You’re okay with Minghao decorating your house with it because he loves it, but that’s all. And now you’re in a rough patch and where are you right now? A place that he loves more than you do.”
You hummed and looked away.
“What I’m trying to say is that you’re not here without a reason, you just need to know how to return the gesture to him.”
“Have you ever considered becoming a public speaker?”
The guy laughed. “Next to being a florist, I also offer free therapy sessions. Part of the job.” His chuckles eased into a smile. “You have no idea the things I’ve seen since working here. Flowers play a bigger role in people’s lives than you might assume.”
“I get why you and Minghao get along so well,” you remarked. “It’s like hearing him speak as we’re talking right now.”
“Like attracts like.” He winked and patted the counter. “I need to look over deliveries. Take a look around and call for me if you need me.”
You nodded and watched how he slid behind the counter and disappeared in the back. Walking back to the daisies, you kneeled down. They had all kinds of colours, blending into each other so seamlessly it made you smile.
The purple ones had been in your house before. You remembered getting a promotion at work, and telling Minghao was the most exciting part of the day. That same night, you had a small bouquet, which included the purple daisies.
You’d always assumed they were purple because it was your favourite colour, but it was the only time you’d seen them. Faded to the back of your mind, passing it off as something insignificant.
As if it had never mattered at all.
With a soft sigh, you came back up. You dusted your pants off and straightened your jacket. As you turned around, you bumped into someone.
“Did I look lost again?” You remarked with a chuckle. When you looked up, Minghao was staring right back at you.
You froze.
His eyes scanned you carefully, and you couldn’t help but drown in them.
“You do look kind of lost,” he finally said. “I thought my mind was playing tricks on me when I saw you here.”
You shrugged weakly and crossed your arms over your body.
Minghao nodded at the buckets. “What were you looking at?”
Your eyes darted to the purple daisies.
“Ah,” he hummed and bowed down, picking one from the bucket. He observed it before giving it to you.
You took it carefully and held it to your chest.
“I know purple is your favourite colour.” He nodded his head at the flower. “That’s not what that daisy is about.”
You tilted your head. “What do you mean?”
Minghao placed a hand on the small of your back and guided you further into the shop. The touch was electric, lighting a flame that you thought had long died out. “Purple daisies resemble success, and admiration. When I put them in your living room, I was celebrating your promotion.”
He picked a pink flower. “Pink lilies bear the same meaning, and they were also in that same bouquet. Admiration and gratitude.”
You took the lily from him. “What flowers say ‘I’m sorry for everything, please forgive me?’”
Minghao stopped in his tracks. He looked over his shoulder.
You took a small step towards him. “I really am sorry, Hao. I don’t want you to feel undervalued, or misunderstood, and I hate myself for not realising earlier that that’s what this is all about.”
He turned around in full.
“You know,” you looked up at him with a small smile, “if I would’ve engaged earlier, be more open-minded like you’d tell me,” you nudged Minghao, making him chuckle. “I would’ve realised much sooner that it’s one of the most touching gestures someone has ever made for me. So that’s what I’ll try to do from now on.”
He smiled at you.
You caressed his cheek. “And hearing you spew these facts out like it’s breathing, it warms my heart, and it actually makes me excited to hear more.”
“I’m sorry too, my love,” Minghao muttered and leaned into your touch. “I’m very quick to jump to conclusions sometimes and it’s unfair to you especially since you need a little longer to gather your thoughts. I should’ve given you proper time and space to do so, instead of pushing the blame all on you.”
You wrapped your arms around his waist and rested your head on his chest. “We’ll work on this just fine, my love. I’m very sure of it.”
Minghao pressed a long kiss into your hair. “I love you so much, darling. So so much.”
You looked up at him and smiled. “I love you, too.”
He kissed you so eagerly that the heat pooled in your stomach. His hands gripped your waist, nails dipping into your sides like you would disappear again. When you pulled him in closer, he chuckled against your lips.
You pouted when he pulled back.
“I came here to pick up my order,” he muttered. “I need to get back to work.”
“See you tonight?” You offered, to which he smiled.
“You have a key.”
You pressed one last kiss to his lips and watched him walking to the counter. He was talking to the same guy that had taken you under his wing.
As Minghao slipped past, he squeezed your waist. “Seungkwan wants to talk to you,” he whispered and kissed your temple. He rushed out of the door and disappeared around the corner.
You looked over at Seungkwan, who waved at you. With a chuckle, you walked over to him. “What could you possibly need me for?”
“Let’s make you a bouquet for Minghao,” he said with a smile. “I’ll tell you all I need to know.”
When you walked out of the shop with the bouquet, you were light as a feather. Your stomach tingled whenever you thought of how Minghao’s eyes would light up, how he would kiss you passionately that you melted in his arms. Since your fight, you hadn’t felt so excited to see him again.
You knew that he wouldn’t get off work for another hour and set out to his house. The bouquet rested in your hand as you twisted the lock, slipping in before any of his neighbours would see you.
As you looked around, there wasn’t a flower in sight.
The empty vases were lined up on the counter on a towel. They looked dried up and you had no trouble believing they’d been there for a couple of days. Purposeless.
You grabbed the vase that Minghao painted himself, tracing the dried streaks with a smile. You filled it with water and put it in, setting the vase on the saloon table in the living room. ‘A center piece’, Minghao had often told you. You hoped that this would meet his requirements.
Minghao had texted you about dinner, opting that he would get something on his way home. You agreed with a smile.
When you heard the lock clicking not much later, your heart jumped.
You rubbed your hands together and balanced from the front to the heel of your feet.
Minghao pushed the door back into its lock with his hip, the crackling of a plastic bag following him around. When he walked into the living room, he yelped.
Covering your mouth, you suppressed a giggle. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
“What are you already doing here?” His eyes darted to the bouquet on the table and his lips twisted into a smile. “That wasn’t there before.”
“Happened to come with me,” you watched him set the bag down and observe it. “Seungkwan helped me. It’s not how the professionals do it, but–”
“It’s perfect.” Minghao looked back at you and opened his arms. “Come here, you.”
You walked right into his arms, inhaling his citrus, amber scent. You closed your eyes with a hum. “I missed you a lot, Hao.”
“I you too, my love.” He ran a hand through your hair before pressing a kiss to it. “Let’s eat before dinner gets cold.”
You peeked inside the bag curiously and smiled brightly. You grabbed the servings and sat down on the ground. “You know, why Seungkwan works in a flower shop is beyond me,” you said and opened the container.
Minghao chuckled. “He’s a talker, hm?”
“He is.” You put the other one in front of your boyfriend and grabbed a spoon and a pair of chopsticks. “A good one at that, though. Very convincing.”
“He’s helped me since the first time I set foot in that place,” he started and stirred his soup. “I just moved to the city and I wanted a good bouquet for my living room.”
“The center piece,” you said in unison.
Minghao looked at you with a smile before he continued. “He knows everything there is to know and I really formed some kind of friendship with him.”
“He’s a nice guy.” The broth you sipped from was an explosion of flavours, making you groan. “God, I missed this.”
“I thought I’d treat you.”
With a smile, you spent the rest of the dinner catching up with Minghao; work, your parents, your friends. For the first time it wasn’t silent, as if your relationship had completely reinvented itself.
As Minghao was at the counter cutting the branches of the flowers, you stood behind him, your arms wrapped around him. Your head rested against his back, your eyes closed. “If you cut them at an angle, they’re able to absorb more water,” he told you. “Your beautiful bouquet will stay alive for a very long time.”
You smiled. “I worked very hard on it.” You peeked up at him. “Can I tell you about the flowers?”
His smile grew. “I would love to hear it.”
“I picked the blue orchids first,” you said and looked out of the window. “I had never seen it before, but it’s a way to express that you think of someone as beautiful in a unique way. And Seungkwan told me it’s spiritual so naturally, I had to pick it.”
“Flattered.”
You grinned at him. “You should be.”
“And then you chose red lilies,” Minghao continued, followed by a sheer cut.
“I know it looks a little odd next to the orchid, but they’re a symbol of love. I thought a red rose was too standard, so Seungkwan showed me these.”
Minghao looked back at you. “You really put a lot of thought into this, didn’t you?”
“And I’m not even finished,” you said with a small smile, the heat flushing your cheeks. “I did pick white and pink roses because they made me think of you.”
He smiled and put the bouquet back into the vase as you let go of him. “Pink is joy and appreciation.”
“And white symbolises a fresh start,” you added. You pointed at the daffodils on the side. “Just like those, moving away and transforming.”
“And pink camellias because you missed me.” Minghao bumped your hip. “Sappy.”
You chuckled and bumped him back.
He draped an arm around your shoulder and locked you into his side. “Thank you. Truly.”
You stood on your toes and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’ll do anything for you.”
You finally regretted speaking that into existence when you found yourself in the flower shop again a couple of weeks later. Your eyes darted around before you looked back at Minghao. “Seriously?”
“You claim to know so much about this now,” he answered with a shrug. “I would love to see you make a bouquet for your own apartment.”
Shooting him a sweet smile, you traced his arm. “But aren’t you sad that you can’t do it for me anymore?”
“Nope.”
“Was worth a try.” You looked around again and your eyes landed on Seungkwan. When he looked back at you, his eyes lit up.
He came over hurriedly. “You finally got her here!”
You arched an eyebrow and turned to Minghao.
“We’re here for some pieces for her apartment,” he said and placed a hand on the small of your back. “She’s going to pick them out herself, as she’s claiming to have the hang of it.”
Seungkwan bobbed his head, his upper lip curved upwards like he was impressed. He remained where we stood and smiled. “What are you looking for?”
“Something for my kitchen,” you answered and frowned. “Why does this feel like a test?”
Behind you, Minghao chuckled. He pushed you forward gently and followed you to the daisies. “I told you she would go there first.”
Seungkwan chuckled and joined you at the front of the shop. Instead of walking after him, you navigated the shop like it was your second home. With a bright smile, you walked out of the shop with the bouquet and your boyfriend back by your side.
A place that you never thought you would ever step foot in had become like a second home in an oddly beautiful way. After your fight with Minghao, that very shop had brought you back to each other like no flow could. And this time, you wouldn’t drift away from each other anymore.
