You should listen to trans men about their experiences and their lives even if it makes you uncomfortable because it contradicts your ideas about us- because perhaps that means your ideas are incomplete.
If the only trans men you listen to are the ones that already agree with your preexisting beliefs, if you only acknowledge those trans men when you need to use them as fonder to affirm your worldview and deny reflection or challenge of your perspective, you don't actually care what we have to say. You just care what you have to say about us, and have effectively ripped our own narrative from us to suit your needs.
If a trans man disagrees with your assumptions about him and other trans men, especially if many do, it is your responsibility to question why that would be on your end first- not to immediately assume malice, ignorance, or dishonesty on ours.