Significant posts about California

i was at an event last night in california and i went to the bar to order wine bc wine was like, a thing, and i looked at the menu and saw i was completely out of my depth bc idk any wine names, so i turned to my right and there was a man in a gorgeous suit standing at the bar beside me and i said “do you know anything about wine?” and he said “a little, yes!” i told him i liked white and dry wines and asked if he’d order for me. he asked the server for two glasses and had one poured for each of us and then he clinked his glass on mine but he didn’t take a sip, he just watched me taste mine and then he asked what i thought and i said “it’s pretty good, but like i said, i wouldn’t know.” he laughed and told me to have a good time & i walked away. fifteen minutes later i found out he’s the winemaker.

they should make being from california illegal [remembers im highly critical of policing and the law as institutions] we should restructure society so that nobody is from california

I can’t stop thinking about that screenshot of that TikTok or whatever and it’s the Tuscany landscape but it looks likes Bakersfield California or something

i just got insider access to the biggest spider in san frico

As a former Californian I want to let you know that people actually hate it when you call it san frico, you should say 'frisco instead, they really love that C:

i'm not talking about san fransisco im talking about a different city called san frico that lives underneath the bay in a large network of tunnels and caves