"Hello, world!"

Having to clean the shower is so fucking annoying. It’s clean in there. That’s where I go to get clean. It’s clean dude trust me. Stop fucking growing bacteria and stuff man this is the clean locale. You’re embarrassing me in front of the sink

trials and tribulations ass year

You've heard of the man, the myth, the legend. Now get ready for the woman, the omen, the portent.

"Anti kink this" "Anti kink that" my brother in Christ you are so obsessed with what people are doing in the bedroom it comes off as voyeurism

Which is a kink

I am genuinely not advocating for a return to queerbait tv, I was vocally against it the whole time it was happening that was like my whole shtick for a while but it is kind of wild that when gay people weren’t allowed on tv, gay characters (who weren’t allowed to be gay) would be drinking poison for each other and killing bad guys for each other romantically and offering to go to prison in each other’s place and now that we are allowed to have gay people on tv…gay people will just be having a healthy conversation and going going on a date like normal people. Get OUT of my face with that

isnt it interesting that two people can read the same book and one will just move on and the other will have their entire dna changed by the characters i just love that reading is such a unique and entirely human experience

i feel like an often overlooked downside to 10-episode seasons and the death of the "monster of the week" format is that we get way less whump variety nowadays. used to be that there'd be dozens of opportunities for your fave to get punched or kidnapped or hypnotized or what have you. these days if it doesn't fit into the main plot, it just doesn't happen. this is a tragedy. we should be protesting.

when you save alarms for specific things but then you just keep reusing them. like sure wake me up at the chocolate milk alarm, what do i care

i’ll read fanfiction of plays idgaf i’ll read fanfiction of anything. i’ll read fanfiction of concept albums. music videos. classic lit. sci-fi dime novels from 1965. niche RPF of foreign actors. i’m an academic

i look up fanfiction for random bullshit all the time even if i don’t read any of it i just like to see what people are cooking. monitoring the ecosystem

You really can’t find this type of humor anywhere else

Keep your chin up king, how else are vampires supposed to be able to reach your neck?

canon (derogatory)

fanon (more derogatory)

my personal interpretation of the character (affectionate)