Null

it’s december 1 where’s the christmas tail kitten bring him to me

Look it him!!!

this will be the year I finally convince everyone to abandon New Year's resolutions in favour of Yule Boasting, the clearly superior tradition

allow me to explain. Yule boasting is an old Norse tradition of getting shitfaced at the winter solstice feast and standing up to proclaim all the great, infamous, and wildly improbable deeds you will perform in the coming year. can range from an unlikely but technically possible claim, like "I'm going to rob 300 banks", to something you'd have to bend the laws of the universe to actually accomplish, like "I'm going to punch a god in the dick and steal his horse". these are not plans. they're not even goals. they're the things you'd do in a self-insert superhero fanfic. and honestly all I want this holiday season is for a bunch of friends to go all in on this nonsense with me and hype ourselves up in ways previously unimaginable

I think we owe an apology to the Americans, looks like at least some of the issues with their healthcare system can be addressed with guns

american problems require american solutions

oh so you’re telling me the guy had a 3 page handwritten explanation of his motives and mindset and a gun and silencer that matches the description despite it being a week since the guy was shot? hmmmm interesting

I hope every health insurance exec dies from painful and preventable disease

it seems not everyone is as patient as I

that post could have been a conversation with an understanding friend

nothing will change your perspective on a character like someone who is batshit obsessed with them

idk if this is a boomer take but I think ppl should make more of an effort to go see movies in theaters bc I couldn’t bear it if the movie theater industry went down and the only way to watch movies was through streaming I’m not strong enough

Actually I’ll make it even more boomer because I genuinely think it’s a good thing for people to have a reason to put down social media for an hour or two and just focus all their attention on a movie together and get fully immersed like I think that’s good practice for our attention spans and ultimately for our mental health (unless you’re a person who uses your phone during the movie in the theater in which case uh idk die)

king

King

“Pack it up boys we’ve made a social blunder” is the funniest sentence I’ve ever read 😭😭😭😭😭