Hummus,

circadian rhythm? no, i have a cicadian rhythm. i sleep for 10 years and then scream fuck and die all at once. i do this every day.

hi this is actually my all time favorite tumblr post

Bridge over troubled water……………….

not to sound like a commie or anything but I hate how it costs money to be alive

There’s a tornado warning out (two, technically), so of course I went for a walk outside to see if I could spot it.  Never have I seen so many of my neighbors at one time, when there wasn’t a firework show or a picnic.

There was a tornado warning and a bunch of people gathered outside to set off fireworks. I wish I was kidding.

How cool would it be to shoot fireworks into a tornado?

the trouble is humans are literally structured to find “a wizard did it” a more plausible explanation than things just happening by accident for no reason.

How dare a wizard make humans think like this

goddamn it here we go again