"Non-traditional" immigrant

The most important detail…

Hey people. I am not sure if anyone will read this, and to be honest, I’m not even sure what it is that I want to write about. I decided to do this because I needed to calm myself. I gave myself permission not to work for a little bit and do what I always wanted: travel…but I need to at least do something productive.

You see I am very hard on myself and decision to voluntarily become unemployed is weighing very heavily on me. As an ideal/proper/conventional (?) Ukrainian immigrant I am supposed to be working hard and saving money to support my parents and build a proper family one day. Live the hard life and be the 1st generation who lays a cornerstone for the prosperous future of my grandchildren. Instead I am fucking around, having a first world problems like discovering "who am I?". I rarely save money and if I do - I spend it.  I give myself a lot of shit for of it…but in the end it was my choice to move to states so I can have a better life and spend enormous amounts of time wondering about my mental state of mind rather than struggle to survive. 

So how did I get to where I am now? Well…

After getting a bachelor’s degree in accounting, then working for a year in a staffing agency - having break downs, panic attacks and doing a lot of binge drinking I decided to quit it. I worked crazy hours on the boat this summer which calmed me down mentally but burned me out physically.  I have no clue what I want to do with my professional career and I am a little tired of the city so I decided to get the hell out. I am subletting my place in NYC for 3 months and going wherever the wind takes me….

Well, kind of. I do have a small plan. I bought a ticket to South Carolina to visit my friend Terry and after that a one way ticket to Dominican Republic. I'll be there for 2 weeks and that's when the wind comes into play.