Cheesy Bread Energy

​Kinsey scale for whether you’re more cloth or wire

my luminous mama

“what’s the song of the summer” ?? it’s DANCING IN THE DARK by bruce springsteen for the 42nd year in a row

i knew it! he's a vampire! i knew it! i knew it! i knew it, he's a vampire! he's a vampire, i knew it! i knew it! he's a vampire! i knew it!

dude honestly shout out to my guards i told them to seize this guy and before i could even finish my sentence they soze him. My goats

Okay good news so it turns out the pure of heart actually can pour grease down the sink

I Was So Good And Polite They Are Putting Me In The Touch Tank At Aquarium Tomorrow.

yeah actually we removed the big bad wolf from the little red riding hood story because portraying violence against minors is really messed up. yeah. yeah also the wolf narrative was really predatory and had had some icky grooming vibes and a fable meant for literal children shouldn’t have implied p*do shit and grape so now little red riding hood goes into the woods and nothing happens and she goes to grandma’s house. don’t worry our kids will still stick to the path and know not to follow to wolves implicitly because we told them to and children should always do as their told. just like little red riding hood does now.

candy before beer youre in the clear. beer before candy hurricane sandy

people aren't even getting a little bit genghis khan anymore. you guys used to love getting a little bit genghis khan