nimrod262

“Ahh!  This is nice, Ace.  Just you, me, and the Ruffster.”  

He scratched the black and tan, German Shepherd’s ear with his free hand, and the big dog huffed, his long tail wagging.

“Just what I was thinking.”  The full lips smiled, the lean, golden skinned body turning on its side the better see his partner.  “Babe?”

“Hmm?”

“You do know what day it is?”

“Yeah, Saturday.”

“No, I mean the date.”

The big shoulders shrugged indifferently.  “Dunno, but I get the feeling I’m about to find out.”

“July, 1st.  It’s our anniversary.  The tenth, to be exact.”

“Er, so is it the 1st or the 10th today?  I’m confused now.”

“Bear!  It’s July 1st, 2023, the tenth anniversary of…C’mon, you can do this.”

“Um, 2023 so take away 20…minus 10, so carry the one…er, 13…uh, add the 20 back…2013…Oh!”

“Yes, exactly.  Oh!”

“I thought we didn’t talk about, you know, Oh?”

“We don’t…but it gave rise to Nivanfield, as everyone quickly dubbed it.”

“Particularly the press.  How the hell did they find out?  Bastards!”

“Possibly, but then our fans took it up, and so it became a ship.”

“What, like a cruise-ship or something?  I prefer planes.  I’m all at sea with ships.  Ha!”

Hazel eyes rolled upwards.  “Dreadful!  No, I mean a fandom ship…as in I ship Nivanfield, he writes Nivanfield, or she draws for the Nivanfield ship.”

“Hmm, I think the fans are yours.  Screaming for you, blowing kisses, crying over your picture, asking you to sign their underwear…and that’s just the guys!”

“Behave!”

“Why?  I’ve done all four myself, still do occasionally.”

“Just last night, actually.”

“Ha, ha!  That was something else!  Didn’t need your picture though, had the real thing.”

“And you weren’t wearing any underwear for me to sign!”

“Ha!  You still left your mark though!”

“Ten years.  It’s been quite a ride!”  

“More like a round-the-world cruise.”

“Heh, heh, The S.S. Nivanfield.”  

“So, where are we going next?  In this ‘ship’ of ours.  I assume it’s ahead and not astern?  You always look fo…” Chris caught Pier’s eyes narrowing.  “…Oops, sorry, we, always look forward.”

“Don’t you have a plan?  You love plans.”

Chris stretched out his arms behind his head, yawning dreamily.  “At this precise moment in time…No.”

Piers propped himself up on one elbow.  “Well, there’s a first!”

“If it ain’t broken…”

“Heh, heh, and there’s a gazillion!”

“Ha!  So, what’s our next port of call?  Cos if you don’t have somewhere particular in mind, I can fix that…”  Chris rolled on to his side and ran his fingers down the trail of golden hairs on Pier’s belly that always led to treasure.  “…Grrrrr!”

"Woof?” Ruff looked up expectantly.

“No, not you pup, the other one!”

“Arrff!”

“We’re entering unchartered waters.”  Piers pursed his lips, fighting back his darker emotions.  He didn’t like ships, or the sea they sailed on.  Now, he wished he’d thought of another metaphor.  But not Chris.

“Ooh, sounds exciting!” he replied  “So, why the frown?”

“What if there are rocks?”

“I’ll smash them, with these two fists.”

“What if there are gales?”

“I’ll blow back, even harder, with this big chest.”  Chris puffed said chest out to make his point.

“What if there are pirates?”

“Bring it on!  We’ll beat ‘em, and then bring down jolly Roger.”

“Jolly who?”

“Roger, the cabin boy.  Whenever you read about pirates, he’s always being hoisted, poor kid.  Probably scared of heights by now.  We could give him a proper home.”

“Enough!”

“Pftt!  You can’t get enough.”

“Stop it!  What if there are sea-monsters?”

“Dammit, Ace!  This is some freekin ocean we’re sailing on!  Rocks, storms, sea-monsters, talk about a sea of crises!  Why the sudden introspection?”

“There’s always monsters.”

“Done that one, remember?  You zapped him, er, it.  Finito!”

“Don’t remind me!”

“You started this!  Chill out, Ace.  Please, for me?”

“OK, always for you.  But it was you who actually started it, Babe.  First time I set eyes on you.  San Diego airport, March 14th, 2010.  I don’t remember the exact time, I was, uh, transfixed.”

“I think the word you’re looking for is smitten.  You kept staring at me, on the plane.”

“At your reflection, in the window.  You were smoking hot.  You still are.  And that Reaction cologne…ouff!” Piers fanned himself at the memory.

“You were pretty cute yourself, not that I noticed back then.  I always was two steps behind.  Three wasted years.”

“You caught up in the end.  That’s what today’s about.”

“Catching up?”

“No, us being in step, synchronized.  Both of us a perfect match for the other.”

“Two as one?”

“Exact…”

“Yoo-hoo, Cap’in!  It’s me, er, Finny.” came a sudden voice from nearby.

“…Or three…”

“Hi, Piers, where are you?” asked a second, and deeper voice.

“…Or four!”

“Huff!  Woof!”  Ruff barked happily in response, running off down the path to find him.  It was Danny, his No. 3 dad!

Piers looked accusingly at his partner.

“Did you…?”

Chris shook his head and crossed his heart.  “I swear!"

“Babe?” Piers fixed him with the icy cold look.

The bear scratched the back of his neck sheepishly.  “Well, I might have said something.  And besides, they’re our boys.  Mini me and, uh, bigger you.”

“Heh, heh, you idiot!  I don’t mind really, providing they’ve brought some food.  I’m starving!”

“They have.  And you always are.  All part of my masterplan.”

“The, uh, one you didn’t have?”

“Yup.”

“Perfect.  Now, put your top back on.”

“Why?  Nothing they haven’t seen before.” Chris gazed down at his mighty chest proudly.

“Because it’s not polite, in company.”

“Pftt!  You’d love to see Dan with his top off.”

“Umm, I’m more concerned with Finn getting sunburn.”

“Liar!  I call bull.”

“Well, that last bit was true.  Now shush, here they come…”

“And whaddya know?  Danny Boy’s damn near naked!  Jeez!  Could he get those red silkies get any tighter?” Chris whispered admiringly.

…

“Piers, are you listening to me?  Piers!  Hello!”

“Uh?  Sorry?”

“C’mon, stop scoping, and put your tongue back in.  Let’s go meet and greet.”

“Hi, Cap’in, you’re looking awesome as ever!” Finn bounded over, arms outstretched, all silly grins and crimson blushes, under a floppy brimmed boonie.

“Finny!  C’m here you!”  Chris hugged Finn tightly against his chest.  “Love the new hat.  But what happened to your beanie?”

“Mmmff, D,Daniel said I should cover up properly.  Tee-heh!  He thinks I’ll burn.”

“And will you?”

“Oh yes, probably.  I’m hot already…well, you are…um…warm, I mean.  Not hot…well you are…Oh Dear!”

Meanwhile, Dan smiled shyly and put his hand out.  “Hi Piers, good to see you.”

“You too Danny, you look hot too…I mean you are hot…I, er, I mean you must be hot…in all those shorts…Oh, my God, it’s catching!  D,did you walk all the way?”

“He, he!  Yes, we both needed the exercise, and I can’t remember the last time I had the sun on my body.  Remember when we used to run in these woods together?  Swim naked in the pond?”

“Like it was yesterday.”

Danny sighed.  “I miss those days.”

“Still here, available for runs, walks…”

“But not the skinny dipping!  Ha, ha!  Hello Danny…or do I say Doctor Macauley-Svenson these days?”

“Danny’s fine, Sir.” Chris glared.  “Um, sorry, Chris.”

“Ha!  Gotcha!  You guys bring the food?”

“Yes, Finny doubled up the rations.”

“And the…?”

“Yes, two bottles…”

“Each?”

“He, he, good one!  Finn and I drink responsibly these days, now we’re doctors.”

“Huh?  Just as well I brought some extra then…well, it is our anniversary.”

“Um, what of?  You’ve haven’t been married a year?”

“Perhaps, but Piers and me have been true partners for ten years.  Well, officially, as Nivanfield.  Personally, I think it’s longer.  Anywho, it seems an appropriate time for a family celebration.”

“Uh, I’ve often wondered.  Who came up with that name, Nivanfield?” Danny asked whilst pouring out the champagne.

“Ahh!  Well, Piers thinks it was the media, but I’ll let you into a secret…” Chris placed a brawny arm affectionally round Danny’s broad shoulders.  “…it was Claire.  She started using it way before anyone else.  Said it was cute, and when, not if, but when, we got married, we should use it.  Or else!”

“And so here you are, Cap’in and his Ace.” Finn grinned his special grin.

“Here we all are, Finny.  And I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“How ‘bout you, Piers?” asked Danny.

“Well, I might change some…”

“Grrrr!” Chris rumbled.

“…Uh, OK, on reflection, it’s perfect as it is.”  

Chris relaxed, grinning contentedly.  “And if it ain’t broken…”

“DON’T FIX IT!” replied the others, in unison, as they raised their glasses.

“HAPPY TENTH NIVANFIELD DAY!”

It was Chris' turn to shudder. "That first time wasn't fun. Not for you, not for me."

"Hey, chalk it up to experience. We move onwards and upwards, Babe. OK?"

"Oh dear!"

"What?"

"Er, you shouldn't have said upwards . . ."

"Why not?"

"Cos . . ."

"Ahh, yeah. I can fell it now, in the small of my back!"

"I swear it's got a mind of it's own. As soon as I see you present your beautiful ass, it's up and ready."

"Chris, really! You've seen my ass before."

"Not that much. I mean, I was always on point, in front. You were always kinda’ in the rear . . . OMG, that didn't help!"

"Yeah, I feel it too. But you've seen me naked lots of times, in the showers, in the field."

"Um, well, I never used to take that much interest. I mean, I used to check all the team out."

"You did!? All of them! You been holding out on me, Captain?"

"No, not like that! I mean I used to check for injuries. You know, cuts, bruises, combat damage. Now, whenever I see your backside, I get all flustered. So I try not to look. Trouble is, if I look down at my feet, I bang my head on something. And if I look at the ceiling, I stub my toes."

"Ahh, my poor, poor Bear."

"Finn thinks it's hilarious."

"Oh, does he? I need to have words with that rookie. What about the others?"

"Well, Ben goes bright red and tries to look anywhere but there."

"Good man, so he should. And Andy and Carl?"

"They don't seem to notice. Too busy hatching some plot or other, I guess."

"Thank God for that!"

"I don't know what they do when my back's turned though."

"Hmm, I can guess!"

"Uh, anyhwo, how 'bout it?"

"What?"

You know, thingy. I mean, I'm all ready . . ."

"Obviously!"

". . . and it would help warm you up."

"Now?"

"Er, yeah, why not?"

"Because there are certain formalities to go through first."

"Formalities?"

"Yes."

"Like what?"

"Well, consent for a start."

"Oh, don't you want to then?"

"No, argh, I mean yes! But first we . . ."

"Have to go through formalities?"

"Yes. Not just consent, but hygiene, health and safety."

"Jeez, you make it sound like a planning breakdown. Can't we just . . .?

"No, Bear! For a start, it would be a good idea if we always agreed to use a condom."

"OK, if you say so."

"You say it!"

"Alright! I agree, I agree. Now can we start? I can't keep this up for ever."

"Well, put it on then. Better still, I'll put it on, I like that."

"Oh . . . Uh . . . Um."

"You don't have one, do you?"

"No. The next time, OK?"

"Chris, there won't be a next time, or a this time! You just agreed! You have to remember."

"I, I'm not always good at remembering."

"Don't remind me!"

"Hey! I'm your superior officer! I remember that!"

"Pfftt, not in our bed. You remember that!"

"Grrr!"

"Look, I'll help you. How about using a memorable phrase, something like 'if you wanna' stick it up, first you gotta suit it up'."

"Ha, I get you! Like 'If I wanna' dick up, first I gotta' rubber up'."

"Um . . ."

"Or 'rubber up to fuck up'."

"Er . . ."

"I got it! 'shoot up, suit up'! Ooh, even better, 'suit up to fuck up'."

"Sounds like Alpha going out on a mission."

"Yeah, Ha, ha . . . Hey, wait! I resemble that!"

"If the rubber cap fits."

"Grrrr! OK, SUSU it is then."

"SUSU?"

"Yeah, Shoot Up, Suit Up. SUSU. One of those demonic things."

"Demonic? do you mean mnemonic?"

"I might do." Chris replied huffily. "I had mnemons for loads of things in school, biology, math, history, the periodic table, the founding fathers . . ."

"Biology? Really?"

"You know, the seven signs of life, blood, breathing, photosynthesis, chloroform, all that kinda' shit."

"Err, shouldn't that be chlorophyl?"

"Sure, probably. Anywho, then I took the first letter of every mnemonic and made one great big word. All the answers in just one word. It was pure genius on my part." Chris puffed his already impressive chest out. This particular bedroom conversation was going well.

"So what happened?" Piers had to ask, even if he already knew the answer.

"Uh, I forgot the word!" the big chest deflated.

"Babe!"

"It was then I realized I had to make a new plan."

"Like seriously revise you mean?"

"No, like seriously cheat!"

"Christopher!"

"Abalone I think it was . . . or was it Albatros? Something with A's in it."

"Asinine?"

"No, it wasn't an animal. It was a bird . . . or a fish."

"Unbelievable!"

"No, it wasn't a verb either, Ace."

"Unbelievable is an adjective!"

"That was it! Adjective! See, I knew you'd get the hang of it eventually, Piers. You've got the same smarts as me. That's why I chose you as my No.2."

"Arghh!!"

"Still cold, huh? Here, let me tighten up."

"Gurrk! T,too, t,tight!"

"Oops again. How's that? Better?"

"Hmm, much. Thanks, Babe."

"Now, where were we? Oh, yeah, SUSU. I can remember that . . . Wait, no I can't, it's not a real word! Dammit, Ace, what sounds like SUSU?"

"Er . . ."

"Ooh, I got it!"

"You have? That was, um, especially expeditious . . . for you."

"What? No, not the Mary Poppins word, the SUSU thing."

"Mary Poppins?"

"Who? No, it's Sushi! Ha! That's a word, isn't it?"

"Yes, although I'm not sure how we got there."

"Do keep up, Piers! SUSU, sounds like . . ."

"Sushi?"

"Yeah, it's obvious."

"Oohhkayy. If it works for you I guess I'm happy."

"Ha, me too, Ace! So, let's sushi up then."

"You don't have a condom, remember?"

"Goddamit! I'll have to squeeze into one of yours then."

"Watch it!"

"Uh, I just thought, what if, by some chance, I forget the sushi?"

"Then I will remind you. Besides, you don't need to remember it! After all, you'll only be having sex with me."

"Oh, yeah, of course, silly me. Ha!"

"Ha? HA??!! Did you have sex with someone else in mind? And think carefully about your answer, Bear. VERY carefully!"

"Um . . . joke?"

"Arrgh!"

"Ah, what happens if you do forget though?"

"Me! That's highly unlikely!"

"You might get a bang on the head say . . ."

"From looking down at my feet I suppose?

". . . Yeah. Or you might be in pain from a stubbed toe."

"From looking up at the ceiling?"

"Hmm, that's more likely. I mean, you'll be flat on your back, in the bed. What else is there to look at?"

"So I'm gonna stub my toe, whilst flat on my back, in our bed?"

"Don't forget the ceiling."

"I'm trying hard not to."

"See, Ace, you'd be preoccupied, and so likely to be forgetful. You really need a nemo thingy for sushi."

"Chris, for the last time, it's a mnemonic! And it so happens I do have one. It's wasabi."

"Huh?"

"Wasabi. You have it with sushi."

"I still don't get it. What's the connection?"

"Well, it only comes in green, it's fucking hot, and it's so strong, it burns your throat and brings tears to you eyes."

"It does?"

"YOU do! It's you, you great dope!"

Oh! Ahh, very good, 'comes in green'. Ha, ha, ha! Hey . . . Hang on a minute!"

Piers sighed as he reached over to the side table. "OK, so what flavor? Mango, strawberry?"

"Um, seaweed?"

"Chris?"

"It's green, goes with sushi . . ."