A/N: fuck I love ugly!Simon
Simon isn´t a beauty, never has been and never will be. his dad beat out the remaining good facial features he had, service did the rest to his body. it´s a miracle how he´s even functioning to begin with, he might as well be a walking corpse, that´s how messy the stitches are that barely hold him together. from gnawing gashes that never healed right to more fragments of bullets still inside than he liked to think about, frayed nerve endings, his goddamn fucked up knee that will be the death of him and definitely makes him curse the most out of all of his maims, his fucking shoulder that keeps dislocating at the most inconvenient times as if it´s actively making fun of him (he wouldn´t be surprised, he has cursed so much at his body parts he swears they come alive at night only to torment him further)
he´s ugly, alright? plain and simple. never gave two shits about it, slap a mask on and avoid stupid questions. now, the older he got the less people actually asked about it, prestige in the field and his rank certainly fucking helped with that, but daft bastard he is, he started joking around about his looks, using every opportunity to mention here and there just how handsome he was, might be or has been
and nobody ever bats an eye, nobody dares to question it and most honestly nobody cares enough to dig deeper, he´s got nobody left to, or frankly he´s never had anyone to begin with, Simon´s a nobody in the saddest way possible, there was a reason he called himself Ghost (one of the few people to actually choose their callsign too and the entire thing was super awkward for every person involved back then)
now, Ghost doesn´t date, doesn´t have interest in sex either, that man does not exist outside of work
so when Johnny introduces him to you he only agrees to the date for him because he doesn´t have it in him to reveal that it was way too late for him for love, Johnny went out of his way for him and while it means a lot to him he just already knows what you´ll think of him, it´s the same every fucking time, granted he hasn´t been on a proper date since 22. but he knows he´s a fuckup, he´s stupid but not that much of an idiot. he doesn´t have anything to offer.
you´re certainly not what he expected and apparently it showed on his face, or his eyes alone, because you took one look at him and sighed. see, you were the captain Soap trained under and an especially hard case to date. you weren´t a people person and only had bad luck with guys so far. apparently Soap put two and two together and thought you´d make a great pair since neither of you were lucky in the love department
Simon had never felt so relieved in his life before, he had been so afraid of Soap bringing someone his age and while most men bragged about fucking younger girls, Simon just found it disgusting.
"Soap tells me you´re having trouble getting laid, I find that hard to believe" you start the conversation and Simon is in heaven, you´re direct, straight to the point, no bullshit, no nothing. you examine him closely, appreciating his broad arms, back, strong legs, height, all of that good stuff, and then stopped at his face, a slow smirk building on your face
"at least your eyes are pretty, aye? don´t need to see the rest" and just like that you have read him, seen right through him as if he was nothing more than just a shell. now where the fuck has Soap been hiding you for this long? you don´t mind that he´s ugly, don´t demand to see underneath the mask and want to fuck him? what else could a lad ask for?
your first time is in the backseat of your car that night, quick and dirty, it´s uncomfortable but you never look back. he´s perfect. and you are to him.
over the next months you never once ask him to take off his mask when fucking, you mostly just ride him or have him on top, sometimes when he´s extra needy and feels stuffy you´ll let him fuck you from behind so he can take off his mask but you don´t have to see him
because you know he´s ugly anyway it doesn´t take him that long to take off the mask in front of you, maybe a year after starting the relationship. it´s when he realises he genuinely has feelings for you and wants to kiss you, wants you to hold him closer and more intimately, wants to whisper into your ear just how much he fucking craves you
you honestly don´t even think he looks that bad, he´s not exactly a looker either but to you he genuinely is the most beautiful man alive. and when you told him that to his face, the face he´s learned to hate so much, he broke down crying and you had to hold him through the entire night, reassuring him that you wouldn´t leave no matter how ugly or pathetic he was, that you loved those things about him and that if he put up with your bullshit, who were you to judge him for his?
now, that´s your day to day but things are very different in bed, you noticed it from the start but never quite brought it up until you were absolutely sure he was fine with it.
the thing is, Simon knows he´s ugly and fuck does he get off on it. especially with you since he thinks you´re so incredibly hot. beautiful as well of course but so so fucking hot. it´s embarrassing how quickly he gets hard just thinking about you, just seeing a slither of skin, hearing your morning voice, seeing how disheveled you look, the way you look when you haven´t showered in two days and he just needs to pounce on you then and there because he quite literally wants to cover himself in your scent? and when you call him a disgusting dog for that? oh he´s already on his knees for you and you can just see it in his eyes, these dumb wide eyes that are just begging to get degraded
and so you do, telling him how ugly he is, how the only good thing his face is for is sitting on it, how he should let you peg him more often so you don´t have to see his face, how you can never cum looking at him, how he should be grateful someone like you is even breathing the air as someone so disgusting as him
you´ve started pulling his mask back on during sex, smiling while riding him because the view is so much better now. one time you´ve talked about wishing you could cut off his dick and attach it to someone hot and he came in seconds, he was actually mortified afterwards because damn he knew he was freaky, but that much?? well, you´re stuck with him now. and you keep saying his dick is his only redeeming quality, even if you did have to show him how to use it and it wouldn´t be good without your guidance (it´s really cute how you warn him about never cheating on you, as if he´d ever look at other women again after meeting you)
your insults get harsher every session and he just feels so safe with you, you´re just telling him what he already knows to be true, but at the same time he can always tell you don´t mean any of it, he sees the way you look at him, and whenever it gets too much he hikes up his mask just enough to kiss you because whenever he does he knows you´ll grip his jaw as if you owned it and softly caress his scars there, gently running your fingers over his stubble as your tongue makes him forget how to breathe, or even think
you call him your pretty baby after every single session and it never fails to make him absolutely melt into your touch, he hated being touched before meeting you, now he´s a clingy little bitch
but truly, he couldn´t be happier. it doesn´t matter what he looks like, the whole world could call him ugly, as long as he had you by his side proving his mind wrong every single day (one day he found all the photos you took of his face in your phone, in all sorts of positions, him sleeping, when he wasn´t looking, the very few selfies you took together because he´s always too embarrassed to. yeah, that was the day he told you he loved you)
