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When you love someone, you get mad at them. You get hurt. You hurt them as well. You put scars on them, and if you love them so much you try to heal those scars. You try to make them feel better. You make them feel more loved.

When you love someone, you dont just give up on them. It gets harder each day. But then you love them and no matter how hard it is, you stay because it is still harder without them. So you try to fix everything.

When you love someone, you wonder whether they have eaten, they went home safely, whether they are feeling alright or bad. When you love someone you want them to be always in good condition.

When you love someone, you want them to stay with you forever.

When you love someone, you wipe away their tears, you hold them as long as they wanna be held.

I recently checked out an LGBT Buzzfeed article where a Journalist conducted an Grindr experiment where he changed his headline to Masc4Masc, grew out his facial hair and put on a few extra pounds. He noticed more messages came in quick asking to hook up and for a gym partner. I decided to do my own experiment, how do white gay men feel about their counterparts who differ from them. I used a picture of my friend (whose attractive and white) and I used the headline No fems, No Blacks, No Asians, No Fats. The amount and speed the messages came in was shocking. Over 100 messages in 24 hours was outstanding results and the replies were even better. Unsolicited penis picture, the “hey” followed by a face pic and other greeting filled the inbox. The ages ranged from 17 all the way to 50. I then wondered how was I going to get all these guys to expose their racism? After they sent a face picture I replied with “Thank God you aren’t a nigger, hey man” and no one called out the racism, in fact guys just expressed that they weren’t into black guys either. Some comments stood out amongst the rest.

“lol not into dark meat either” “Haha you must be on the same page as me. I don’t like black guys. Theyre dirty and most of them have hiv or stds” “I’m not racist, but I’m certainly not attracted to black guys” “I don’t like black guys either, wanna hang out?”

1. Self rejection

2. Negative self-talk

3. Criticising others

4. Being a people pleaser

5. Fear of failure

6. Procrastination

7. Holding onto grudges