The LN-0R Zone

To start, I don't really think that there is truly necessarily 'no such thing as the self'. We can chart out patterns of identity from context, make scientific predictions, and the results won't be fully determined by present context alone. But more than that, I think the idea of the self does have some use.

Careful. Lean back a little more. There we go, perfect. My dolly really is so sweet.

I mean, I get it. Recently you've been going through a lot of changes. It's easy to look at all of this and say that all you are is arbitrary. That your porcelain head is an empty shell. Why wouldn't it be? If the things you felt were your deepest truths could be changed in just... Let me check. -- Two months, seventeen days and five hours.

There you are. Lean into me. You don't need to worry about anything else. Just focus on my words and my touch, like usual.

Well, as I see it, everything you believe about yourself is neither true nor false. Instead, it exists on a different level. Not quite chosen, not quite determined. Constructed in the contradiction between you and not-you. The choices you make versus the experiences you have. From this, 'identity' emerges. You draw a line. But, sometimes the outside comes knocking a little too hard. Like when you met me.

There, there. Good girl. Just focus on my touch. You can think about it all later. Just focus on the feeling of my fingers. Tracing your grooves and cuts.

Thus, I think 'be yourself' puts the cart before the horse. It's a useless little platitude. But it sounds smart because people who loudly succeed always seem to be being themselves. Charisma requires such delusion. I'd agree that a well constructed mind should know the difference between inside and outside, but yours isn't very well constructed, is it? The barriers are broken down, now just about anyone could reach inside and tell you what you are.

Such a pretty dolly. There you are. Sound and touch. Hands on your body and whispers in your ear. Fall in as deep as you want.

No, if I want you to not just break down the moment I'm gone, I do need to build that shell back up again. You need a 'self', an 'identity', a line between 'you' and 'not you'. A way you can behave that isn't just in reaction. Classically, it should be all your own choices, things you're proud of, things you decided. But, I'm not very concerned with what's usually done, just what's effective.

You're really in it, huh? You must have really needed this. Such a cute toy for me. Breathe in, and out. There we go. Good doll.

So, let's get started. What things can we put within you to better explain how you expect yourself to act? What things can we put within you that you can draw on as proof that you understand yourself? What things can we put within you that will provide you a framework for how you should behave?

And then. Ah, mhm.

I suppose you're right. Right now, you don't really have a self. Not a proper one. You exist purely in reaction to me. Thus, I can put anything I want in there and you'll believe it. But that will change. And hopefully I'll craft my doll well enough that no one else will ever be able to break it ever again.