Formerly Newsfmember 25/M / straight / SF :)

Sometime in their life, they’ve felt too ick to get out of bed or leave the sofa. So uncomfy that they wear sweatpants and a tee/hoodie all day. Going through countless mugs of tea, tissues, cough drops.

Used to see this girl in college that was quite exuberant. I.e. very outgoing at parties / unapologetically funny / sarcastic etc. Always imagined that, much like her personality, she’d just let her sneezes out confidently, or maybe just shamelessly poke fun at herself if she was sneezing in public … Nope.

Literally the only times I ever saw her look worried / embarrassed were during the fits I witnessed. She’d bend at the hip and stifle downward toward the ground into her elbow (quite powerfully for how small she was) releasing a quiet “tsooo” followed by a breathy / annoyed sigh or “ugh”. She’d then look back up, and repeat 3 or 4 times. All of this while holding the same pre sneeze face (eyebrows drawn up / mouth barely open).

Have a friend who I sat next to in the same row in a college seminar. This particular time she was sick ( could tell given the voice was a little raspy, probably had already been fighting off something for a while but was the type to come out no matter how ill…)

Knew a fit was coming when i heard a few sniffs combined with a very slight hitch in her breath. She has quite big / puckered lips, which at this point were parted more than usual, and her face was already scrunching slightly.

She always put her fingers up in front of her nose and mouth as if to cover, but never actually covered … would just sneeze with the hand hovering there like 6 inches away (this time was no different of course)

Fluttered her eyes, breathed in with a slight stutter, and let out 3 quite juicy and strong, girly sounding sneezes. Honestly one of the more unique sneezers I’ve heard live.

“HAP-choo!” Is the best way to describe them (two very separate parts). The “Hap” part was super dry / airy / girly and definitely sounded like she was making a statement…

the “choo” that followed would be extremely powerful, misty, and somehow breathy at the same time. Almost seemed like it was being pulled out of her soul lol … and seemed to hang in the air after that initial burst (all of which made her look exhausted for a sec before the next one would start). She would also stretch out “choo” sound each time ending in a higher pitch than she’d started, making the fit feel unfinished until the last one. Honestly some of the wettest / fullest sounding releases I can think of… didn’t seem like she was ever actually making much of a mess, but it sounded like she should have been.

During all of this she’d keep the hand a few inches from her face. Would essentially just hover there almost in a way that made it seem like she couldn’t quite decide if she wanted to cover it or if it would even help (it wouldn’t have).

Used to see this girl in college that was quite exuberant. I.e. very outgoing at parties / unapologetically funny / sarcastic etc. Always imagined that, much like her personality, she’d just let her sneezes out confidently, or maybe just shamelessly poke fun at herself if she was sneezing in public … Nope.

Literally the only times I ever saw her look worried / embarrassed were during the fits I witnessed. She’d bend at the hip and stifle downward toward the ground into her elbow (quite powerfully for how small she was) releasing a quiet “tsooo” followed by a breathy / annoyed sigh or “ugh”. She’d then look back up, and repeat 3 or 4 times. All of this while holding the same pre sneeze face (eyebrows drawn up / mouth barely open).

Stiflers

On one hand, ppl who attempt to stifle their sneezes by bending at the hip are literally engaging in the most peculiar and downright ~sexy~ dance of restraint and release. Something about the instinctive and concerned fold forward as the urge to sneeze builds / their bodies tensing in such a visibly forceful and involuntary way in an effort to contain whatever explosion is impending is just so 🔥. Then they slowly unfurl, slowly lifting their heads upward (HUGE bonus points if there’s an audibly desperate / breathy release during this) and flutter their eyes open revealing a face FLOODED with relief. Aw man…

Let outs / uncovered

Alrighty… first recording …🫣 chinkini arrived and here are two let outs. Didn’t do that much but can do more in the future if people like these / pls feel free to leave any thoughts or feedback 🙃!!