best caption wizard

*trying to pitch public transportation to Americans* it’s like a legal form of texting while driving

i just have this persistent feeling of “i’m not doing enough” combined with “i don’t have the energy to do anything” and it just really fucking sucks

tumblr search function actually came through for me when I searched "hasselback potatoes" and found the exact video i was thinking of

I still dream of one day coming home and finding him standing there waiting for me

Also, do not fucking photograph or film people without their consent!

Every public place and most private places have security cameras. Existing in public is consenting to be filmed. Which--yeah, sucks. But I'm not about to say that Walmart gets to film us at every conceivable angle, but our fellow humans can't record us from their own perspective. It's already a surveillance state. What's one more camera?

Walmart isn't gonna post videos of people to make fun of them on the internet you fucking weirdo.

the worst part of summer is that people get sooo comfortable expressing their disgust at having to see other people’s bodies. they’re always complaining about wrinkly old men at the nude hot springs or fat women in bikinis at the beach. I hate that shit. if you’re not capable of being normal about bodies you personally don’t find attractive, just turn your head to look at something else! and if you’re not smart enough to do that, then at least do the rest of us the courtesy of suffering in silence, because we don’t wanna hear your weird comments. thanks.

i need to get off tumblr i’m at the aquarium admiring the fish and my brain goes “posts that make you want to get in the water” what are you talking about. these are live fish in the room with you. what post.

when some evil cunt dies posting on tumblr carries the feeling of the last day of school before summer break

the reason that wounds that break the skin hurt is because its always supposed to be dark inside your body and when your blood sees sunlight for the first time it gets scared. and that causes the pain. or maybe it doesnt

i miss vhs tapes and cds i miss feeding my computers and tvs yummy treats. now theyre eating nothing. theyre being born without mouths