lady of the canyon

basics.

full name: Eleanor Renee Walsh nickname(s): Nel, Nellie, Elle d.o.b. / age: June 10th, 1989 / 32 gender: Cis female pronouns: She / Her nationality: American sexuality: Heterosexual relationship status: Single hometown: Richmond, Virginia occupation: Online Adult Model / Bartender children: None pets: Jack (tuxedo cat) 

She heard the cat food fiddling in the bowl as she walked back into the kitchen. Her eyes darting around to notice Zay feeding Jack, most likely because he was being bothersome and begging. But... also, because she knew that Isaiah was intuitive. He helped others before himself, even when it came to cats. 

He didn’t have plans to leave. Nel felt that he was a lot more normal than she thought he’d be, about the whole situation. He was collected, his answers felt confident and warm towards her. Her instinct was to run, always. This felt that he was pulling her back in, not spooking her to not trust him. “I didn’t want you to leave anyways,” She responded, her lips pursed a bit. She crossed her arms, feeling the comfort of herself being all she needed in the moment. 

It was a bit embarrassing that she hadn’t made her bed, but yet again, she noticed that Isaiah didn’t seem to have anything to say about it. She crawled into the comfy space, the remote on the bed promptly putting on her comfort film-- Pride & Prejudice. Her eyes turned towards him as her eyes glazed over him; the dim light by her bed made shadows appear over his jawline. “You’re the biggest fucking surprise,” She chuckled, her fingers tracing over his lips and down his chin. “This is definitely not a one and done,” She bit her lip, “You have so much more left to learn, baby.”

Good things come to those who wait. Wasn’t that the truth.

The sunlight that peaked through the windows had dimmed. The air was stale with the smell of sweat, lingering around them in a fog. All that was left was their labored breathing and muscles relaxing. Nel’s hand had dug it’s way into the man’s hair, keeping it there for a minute as she ran it back down his shoulders and his chest. His hair sat against his neck, a bit warm and damp.

Happiness.

Her fingers tapped gently at the man’s pec muscle, a breath let out of her mouth in a bit of release. “Any time? Whenever I want, huh?” She teased him, biting her lip. They sat together, her lap still warm against his. Her eyes didn’t want to meet his as she felt embarrassed by the aftermath-- she shouldn’t have, she knew. The man would take care of her however she needed. “Don’t tempt me.”

Nel stood up from his lap, gently moving her panties back into place. Her body reaching over to find a shirt that sat on the ground. The one that caught her fingers was different than the smaller baby t-shirt that she had been wearing; this one smelled like cologne and warm musk. His shirt. Slipping it over her hair and down her back, she let it lay over her small frame. She took a minute to head into her bathroom to clean up, looking in the mirror at herself. The smile on her face was... unrecognizable.

Isaiah had always been goofy. It was this weird essence that Nel liked because he was so easy to be around that it made everything feel comfortable. He went with the flow even when he was uncomfortable, even when he suffered in pure silence. He would have never hurt a fly, unless it was hurting someone that he loved. The drive and compassion that he carried was so intense and beautiful that Nel always just knew that there had to be something else. 

It was so new for her to trust and to be on that level with someone. Her eyes zeroed in on him, nodding at his comments. She giggled at his comment, nodding her head. “I think you’re definitely blessed.” 

She moaned softly at his nipping, feeling how hot they felt against her skin. Each one was a bit of a burning sensation that turned her stomach into a case of butterflies. Flinching at the feeling of him, she pulled closer to him, her body arching slightly inwards. “Oh, fuck,” She groaned, knowing that she didn’t have to put on a show. It was a natural reaction to the feeling of being turned on that made her the happiest-- this was real life. She didn’t have to do anything but connect with the person underneath her that meant so much. The one person that didn’t judge her for anything in the world. 

aurorabulan​:

The art thing was new, though she wouldn’t have put it passed Zay to have hobbies such as that. There was something about the way Nel was describing it though that was making it even more territorial than before? She was sweet and nice? Aurora was a little weary of that fact. Was there something she was missing or did Zay just happen to have tunnel vision? Judging by the way he was smiling ear to ear and taking careful precautions when it came to Nel’s dietary restrictions, she figured it was the latter. “Tinitingnan ka niya na para kang isang piraso ng karne.” Aurora spoke softly over to the man. If that was their connection then Aurora couldn’t judge nor would she have if that wasn’t the case either.

 But something about it left her feeling unsettled, especially with the way Nel spoke, it was very abundantly clear that Nel was trying to prove something, whatever it was. Only when she called Zay ‘babe’ did she nod and chuckle. “Zay? Is this your girlfriend?” She questioned, “You never said you were off the market, you dog.” She coaxed.

As the man suggested getting into the photobooth with both women, Aurora politely declined, not wanting to subject herself to Nel’s glares any further. “No, I think I’m only comfortable if it’s just us at the moment.” She was never one to back down when someone was treating her unfairly, so she looped her arm around Zay’s and made a statement that was crystal clear to Nel, “I don’t know if this is the type of thing you’re used to, but I came here with Zay as a friend and you’ve been talking down to me the minute you laid eyes on me, so whatever your deal is, you may as well get it out in the open before you tear through your palms or his neck.” 

@xisaiahcruz​

His smile never left his face, though his brows furrowed at the comment. “What? No she doesn’t,” Zay shook his head back at Aurora. If anything, Nel looked at him the way anybody looked at their best friend. He rubbed the back of Aurora’s hand with the tips of his fingers, a small gesture of reassurance. Though, he wasn’t quite sure what he was assuring her of. 

Girlfriend. He looked at Nel briefly before gazing down at his feet. They hadn’t discussed anything of the sort. Ideally,  he would’ve answered “Yes,” by now, but Nel never made things easy. She was complex, and if he said yes it would cause confusion between both of them in private. “She’s my best friend.” It was the truth. She couldn’t get upset with that. 

“Oh. Yeah, that’s cool! We can hit it later?” he asked Nel. Zay was just about ready to go when Aurora continued. Looking between the two women, it was clear that there was something he missed. Opening his mouth, Zay realized this wasn’t his place– and settled for shuffling uncomfortably in his shoes.

@nelwalsh​

The small glass of champagne wasn’t working fast enough for Nel to block out all of the noise that was accompanying her head. She figured that her behavior towards the woman was mostly unwarranted, but if she would have just stopped touching him, then everything may have been a bit better. Her eyes directed towards Zay at Aurora’s comment. Girlfriend was a strong word. Best friend didn’t feel strong enough. One that they hadn’t navigated through, which made this situation feel even more uncomfortable and worse than prior. 

She had no excuse to be so territorial. Except seeing someone she... cared for being touched by another woman. They obviously had a connection, which made Nel feel worse about the whole endeavor. She knew she shouldn’t have shown up, but if she hadn’t would Zay have seen the way the other woman looked at him? Spoke to him? 

Maybe coming here wasn’t a good idea. Like, at all. Her attention turned towards the woman who grabbed Isaiah’s arm, her face stayed stoic and cold. Nel didn’t take the time to reach back out to the man, knowing that fighting over a man was stupid. Her words didn’t necessarily affect her as much as they embarrassed her, knowing people would probably look at them for acting this way at an event she technically wasn’t even invited to. “My deal is that you’ve been touching him the entire time we’ve been standing here, you’re literally speaking in a different language to talk about me, which isn’t making it any better, and-- for the record, it’s very, very obvious that you’re flirting with him.”

Her eyes looked at Zay quickly, running her tongue over her lips as she down the glass of champagne. “No, we’re not dating, but you could also have the decency to ask if we’re fucking.” She looked at Zay, shaking her head. “Sorry.”

She should have known what she was getting herself into. This was definitely something that needed to be discussed more in therapy. There was a certain charm about Isaiah that Nel could never fully grasp-- he was so easy-going, so warm to everyone and anyone. His confidence radiated through the way he touched her sides and lower back, fully grasping at her skin. 

Her heartbeat raced as she realized she messed up. Zay did not want her talking to him like that, and she felt embarrassed by the action. “I’m sorry,” She shook her head, pulling him closer to hopefully dismiss the action. “I know, I know,” She repeated, blinking a few times as she nodded her head to confirm his words. “I don’t do this.” The words were whispers, moving onto the man’s lips softly as they breathed in each other.

Her hands moved between them, moving the man’s briefs down his hips. Her eyes cast back onto his face as she smirked at him without another word. Impressive. Nel kissed his chin softly, eyelashes casting a shadow on her cheeks in the dimly lit kitchen. She tucked her hand behind her ears, nervously not wanting to mess this up. She could so mess this up. “I’m clean, by the way,” She cleared her throat, “I get tested monthly.” Her lips felt plump from the amount she was biting on them. 

If Nel had thought about it, she’d just take the knife on the counter to cut the tension. It was a mixture of nerves and sexual disregard that surrounded them; she could tell that Isaiah was a bit shaky, she had to admit that she felt very similarly. This was out of her comfort zone... intimacy, that is. She could have someone call her a ‘dirty whore’ on any given day, but God forbid, someone call her beautiful and she was putty.

“Don’t be nervous,” Nel giggled, a bit of nerves running down her spine at the soft jingle of his belt buckle. It felt like a band-aid-- they really just had to rip off the outer layer and get to where they could both feel euphoric. “It’s just me.” Her eyes ventured down to the now uncovered man standing before her. Stepping forward, she used her hand to palm at him before leaning up to kiss him softly. 

Nel turned them so that Isaiah was standing in front of an open seat, her hands guiding him into the chair. She shimmied her way out of her jeans, her panties and baby crop tee still snug in place. Her legs came on either side of him as she strung her arms around his neck, placing herself in his lap. She groaned at the feeling of him underneath her, their hips aching for each other. 

aurorabulan​:​​

Though Aurora may have extended a pleasantry with Nel, it was very clear that she’d either caught her on an off day or the energy that was emanating off of her was incredibly…off-putting. Maybe first impressions just wasn’t her forte’ or maybe she was mentally crushing her hands with her eyes. It was a curious glance, one that Aurora took with a grain of salt. There was condescension in her tone, as if the years she’d known Zay was superior to the weeks that she’d her friendship with the man. “Ganito ba siya palagi?” Aurora questioned to Zay in their native tongue, other furthering Nel’s point that they weren’t on the same boat. “I guess we’re not,” Aurora said, though the light didn’t reach her eyes. 

She was used to smiling even when she felt like it wasn’t warranted. Nel’s dominance in moving forward, her thumb gently cascading at Zay’s neck, Aurora laughed softly as she simply let her hand slip down to his wrist, pointing over to a savory station for food. “Wanna grab a bite? I know you said you didn’t have much today,” She offered, before her eyes glanced over to Nel. Was she punishing her for getting locked out of her car? Or was she just a really bad listener? 

“Zay did just say it’s pretty common.” Aurora began, “If it didn’t, I guess you’d be out of business wouldn’t you?” She teased the man, laughing along with him as she handed him a plate, offering Nel one after as a buffer, though Aurora couldn’t help but feel like the woman wanted to tear her apart. Whatever type of friendship this was, Aurora felt some intensity that she certainly hoped they wouldn’t be around for the rest of the evening. “Hey Zay, you promised on the photobooth, after you chow down let’s head over?” 

@xisaiahcruz​

Isaiah stood between the women, beaming that they were engaging in conversation. Tone and body language were not things he understood; the subtle pull on his wrist from Aurora shocked him and the soft touch of Nel’s hand had him melting like butter. “Hm? Siya ay napakatamis at mabait,” he replied, shaking his head. How was she not seeing it? 

“Yeah, of course!” he beamed. The appetizers looked fancy, as if they used some sort of fancy salt instead of regular salt. “Nel’s a vegetarian though, so I gotta find something that she can eat,” Zay explained, intercepting the plate. So far, it didn’t look like there was much, but some type of salad had to be somewhere. Most fancy parties had some type of salad. 

Looking back at Aurora, Zay laughed softly. There was no back-up plan to being a locksmith, so he was grateful for people’s mistakes. “It was either locksmith or plumber, but some of those pipes…they use a lot of math,” he informed both women. Slipping his free hand around Nel’s waist, he grinned. “Photobooth, with both of you? How’s that sound?”

@nelwalsh​

Her eyes narrowed. The fact that Aurora felt the need to speak behind her back only made the situation worse. The gesture made her skin crawl, her breath leaving her lungs in a bit a fury, but subtly enough that she wouldn’t make a scene at a baby shower, of all places. As Nel progressively made moves on her dominance, she noticed that the other woman didn’t let up. It felt like a girl code that she couldn’t break-- her trust in Isaiah was too much to break, but she felt that there had to be something else that she didn’t know. 

“I don’t know if I’m too hungry, but you go ahead,” Her vision settled on the man’s lips as she gave her own tight-lipped smile, letting her fingers play at the base of his neck. There seemed to be a bit of her that was coming out that she really hadn’t seen before. It became catty, and she didn’t like it... but at the same time, she felt this necessary need to at least be informed of people who felt that they could just touch him like that.

The jealousy that raged through her only made her words quicker, and her brain think less, unfortunately. “Speaking of photos, I mean, being a locksmith is practically a side-job at this point with the money he makes as a photographer,” Her vision went back between them. “You should show her some of your work sometime, babe.” Nel smiled at Aurora, shaking her head slightly, “He’s got a natural eye for art.”

He waited patiently next to her, smirking under the glow of the vent light. “I didn’t know being grateful for a meal meant that I was submissive,” Zay looked at her, eyes glistening. “You work in a restaurant and I trust you not to poison me.” The aroma began to fill the small space, not overpowering but warm. His eyes followed her hand, soft and dainty, as she helped clean up the mess on his face. 

Breath caught in his chest, Zay coughed softly. “Farmer’s market. Let me know the next time you’re planning on going. I’m over here enough anyway, might as well start helping stock up on some food,” he licked his lips. Steam rose from the bowl, but he continued to watch as she stuck the spoon in her mouth, the words hitting his ears slowly. 

“I– oh,” he cleared his throat once more. The problem with Isaiah was, he never would ask. She could’ve been completely naked, sitting in his lap, and he wouldn’t do anything. There was a silence as he struggled to figure out his next move, but he knew he wouldn’t leave. “I know we talked about it earlier, but did you want to have sex with me? Tonight?”

Nel rolled her eyes, a big smile crossed along her face. “For the hundredth time, I’m a bartender. My job is to poison people.” 

It needed a bit of cinnamon. Nel sprinkled the spice over the oats gently before offering the food to her... guest. Her shoulders shrugged before she wiped her hands on the back of her jeans, “I go every Sunday morning. I try to get there early to get the ripe stuff. If you spend the night, it’s a bit easier to get out of here, but you can always meet me.” It felt odd stating the words, as she knew that ‘spending the night’ may have a different meaning than it used to.

At his sudden quietness, Nel wasn’t exactly sure if the words she said were too forward. She didn’t want to scare Isaiah away, but she felt that there needed to be a bit of playfulness that may have been missing. It seemed tense. But at the man’s question, she found herself being caught off guard this time. “Um,” She coughed, feeling tightness in her throat. “Yeah. I mean, yeah. I think that would be good.” She rubbed the back of her neck, trying to keep her composure and the interaction light. “Tonight seems like a great... time to do it.” 

Cool. There was a plan for more. They both wanted more, this was a good thing. Zay needed most things in his life written out, and he couldn’t have been more appreciative of Nel’s openness. Neither of them moved, but everything was out in the open. It would happen. Eventually. 

He had never seen Nel like this– smiling, giggling, and the domineering façade nowhere in sight. “The moment,” he repeated, licking his lips lightly. When the hell was the moment? Was he supposed to know? Obediently, Isaiah stood up and took the few steps to her kitchen as he had so many times before. “However you make it, I’ll take it,” he grinned. The low light in her place messed with the shadowplay, sculpting her cheekbones in a model-esque way. Or it was his infatuation. 

“I don’t have you any way,” Zay giggled. He stared at her with doe eyes before leaning in and taking a slow, deliberate bite. “These are ripe,” he mumbled, wiping at his chin. “You’re really good at getting the most ripe fruit. I feel like I eat more of it than you do.”

Trust was important to Nel. She knew that Zay would never break her trust. That’s all that mattered to her in their relationship, because she figured that everything else came with time. She was happy with him. “You seem a bit submissive to me,” She smirked, “However I want? It’s your dinner I’m making, you should choose.” The oatmeal cooked on the stove, stirring it gently, she added a bit of milk for fluffiness. It felt like home, just the way her mother would cook for her and her brothers growing up. 

Her eyes stayed glued to the small amount of liquid that dripped down his chin, just pink enough that it tinted his tan skin. If she was feeling bold, she’d lean up to “I’m a professional at the farmers market,” She wiped it away with her thumb, and placed it in her mouth to suck off the juice. “We should go together sometime.” Placing the bowl of food in front of the man, she sat at the small island, leaning forward and taking the first bite. 

“You could have had me for dinner if you would have just asked, you know.” Her eyes pondered up, “Kind of why I wasn’t really hungry for takeout tonight.”

aurorabulan​:​

Aurora could only laugh at Zay’s explanation at how he’d come to know the mother’s-to-be and though it seemed unorthodox, she did find it terribly sweet. With the way he spoke about them, she knew it was geunine, though with Zay he didn’t really have room to lie about anything really. “Sounds like you fell into each other when you really needed each other huh,” Aurora asked, as she eyed a pigs in a blanket platter circling around. Unfortunately for her she didn’t get her shot at the pastry goodness, instead Zay had his hand over her, dragging her about to meet his what? 

Soon enough she found herself giving a courteous smile between the brunette who looked as if she was vivisecting her with her eyes. It was a look she’d seen plenty while in the city, she likened it to territorial. Zay had said something along the lines of my Nel, but the inflection was a little off. What was Nel to Zay? A friend? Something more? She’d never come up in conversation but there was never any reason for her to come up. Still, Aurora beamed as she extended her hand to the woman. “It’s only been a few weeks, Zay saved my life opening my car for me when I locked myself out. He’s not mentioned you either though. Are we in the same boat?” 

She noted that Nel had made no move to shake her hand, so slowly she retracted the hand shake and rested her hand on Zay’s forearm. Was this weird? The air kind of felt tense and while Aurora could handle that for work she wasn’t great at it for personal issues. “Anyway, it’s nice to meet you?” 

@xisaiahcruz​

Isaiah stood between the women with a smile on his face, pleased that his friends were meeting. There was no reason for either of them to have come up in casual conversation with the other simply because the conversation never led there. “A few weeks, I think,” he looked down at Aurora and nodded. “Met her on one of my days off, gave her my business card because…,” he shrugged, “people lock themselves out of places all the time.” Common practice. 

It was difficult to describe what Nel was to him. It was so easy to call her a friend, but it didn’t cover the depth of their relationship. He could speak about Nel for hours, but a baby shower wasn’t the time nor place. “Nel is super important to me,” he smiled at her. “She’s my ride-or-die and on top of that, she’s my favorite waitress,” a genuine chuckle came out of him, thinking about how often she was late from clocking out. “Aurora works at the Octavium, doing…” he patted her hand as he tried to recall what it was called. “Something with events? I don’t know the name of it. Maybe she can help you get in to see some of those singers you like?”

@nelwalsh​

If looks could kill, Nel’s eyes would have most likely burned through the hand that sat on Zay’s forearm. It wasn’t anything malicious, she could tell, but she wondered why the jealousy had to come into her throat so intrusively. “I mean, Zay and I have been friends for years, so I’m not sure that we’re in the same boat at all.” Nel smiled, a humorless laugh cycling through her lips as she turned her head away from the situation. If she didn’t get out of this, she may have to say something that no one wanted to hear. 

Nel is super important to me. The words struck a chord, making her heart flutter a little bit. At least it wasn’t the other way around. She knew that Zay most likely kept random people at his side, considering this girl who looked like she was getting closer than Nel would have liked. “I don’t need anyone’s help to do anything, but I’m sure she’s great at her job.” She smiled gently at the man, knowing his intention wasn’t to harm her-- really, she knew that all Zay could do was speak nicely of her and their relationship. 

Standing a bit closer to the man, she placed her hand on his shoulder, moving her thumb up towards his neck a bit as she tried her best to claim territory that she could have sworn was hers a few days ago. “How often do people lock themselves out of their cars?” Her eyes searched between the two people, wondering if a hand would display along her back if she got closer. She should at least try to be nice. “Is that a common inconvenience most people have?” 

Zay blinked twice, just as a precaution. If this was a dream, as it had been many times before, he’d wake up at any moment. Her hand was still on his thigh, and she was staring at him eagerly. With a gulp and a nod, Zay agreed. “More would be nice. I wouldn’t mind trying more,” he placed a hand over hers. “I don’t think this is something that would change anything,” his voice cracked. If things changed, it would only be for the better, wouldn’t it? 

There was no talk of what this meant, but his hand went up Nel’s arm until he was gently cupping her face. “You can walk around in whatever you want, this is your place,” he laughed softly, “but…you know I wanted this for a long time, right? I wouldn’t…I just want to be sure that this is something you want.” His eyes scanned hers for any type of sign to make a move. Any. Instead, Zay dropped his hand and said, “If you have any blueberries for the oatmeal, that would be real nice.”

A bit apprehensive, Nel cleared her throat at the man’s touch, wondering if she really could do something like this. It had been a while since she had trusted someone so deeply, and the trauma of that trust being broken was never fully resolved. She trusted Zay because he allowed her to make her own decisions and work under her own terms. Would that change when the roles changed? “We can do more,” She laughed, feeling her cheeks redden just at the thought. The man was a lot more smooth than he thought he was, she could tell he was sneaky. “As long as you don’t think that... I,” she paused, biting down on her lip. “Yeah. I trust you.”

Already, she felt like putty under his touch. His words meant something to her because she knew that he was loyal. He had shown her that over the years, which made her believe him. This wasn’t just anyone-- this was Zay. “Right, yeah, I know, but it still doesn’t feel real. I guess I’m just waiting for the moment to kick in.” The melting sensation had started to occur with weakness in her knees but was recoiled when he pulled away. She shifted a bit uncomfortably, moving up towards the kitchen at his request. “Blueberries and strawberries,” She pulled at his hand, willing her to follow him into the kitchen. “I like a bit of peanut butter on there too.”

Her hands grabbed the small packet of oatmeal, put some water on the stove, and pulled the fresh berries out of the fridge to start cutting. She tucked the hair behind her ear, questioning her own movements. “You have me all... domestic,” She giggled, holding out a strawberry for him to bite into. “Bite.”

aurorabulan​:

location: Alli & Sanem’s Baby Shower with: @xisaiahcruz & @nelwalsh​

“Honestly, this is one of the nicer bars I’ve ever stepped foot in. I don’t feel like I dressed appropriately though.” Aurora remarked. She flattened out a satin slip dress that she’d dug out from her closet before she had Nadia press and iron it for her. She didn’t expect to dress so fancily, it was in fact kind of a spur of a moment deal. She and Zay had been texting casually ever since the car incident and if she were to be completely frank about the situation she enjoyed hearing from him from time to time. Her schedule was finally taking a small pause as the holiday season was fast approaching, but of the places she could have found herself being in? It certainly wasn’t a baby shower. She didn’t know either of the expecting mothers to be, but her accompanying invitee seemed to be very close to the two women. “How do you know them again? You kind of talk about them like you talk about Andrea or Cherry.” Aurora said, recalling the names of his siblings. Zay asking Aurora to be there with him was definitely not off kilter, they were just friends going to an event as friends, completely harmless. 

@xisaiahcruz​

Zay looked around the place, it was definitely fancy. He didn’t think Alli or Sanem would mind that he was in jeans, but he knew this was the only time he’d ever step foot in this place. “It’s definitely a lot nicer than that place we went to a few weeks ago,” he teased, looking down at her fondly. Aurora was sweet, especially since she agreed to come someplace where she didn’t know either host. Enthusiastically, at that. “They’re two of my best friends,” Zay told her. “You know how people talk about chosen family? They’re…they’re pretty much that for me.” He looked around for either woman, but instead spotted someone equally as important to him. 

“Come on,” Zay grabbed Aurora’s hand, taking the longest strides he could. “You gotta meet my…,” friend? Girlfriend? “Nel.” He didn’t believe she was here! And she looked nice. Really nice. Did she put on makeup? “I didn’t think you wanted to come,” he said to her. Giving a gentle tug to Aurora’s hand, he said, “I don’t know if you two know each other, but Nel, this is Aurora.”

@nelwalsh​

The invitation sat on her counter for a few days. It sat there, getting peanut butter on it, underneath all of her bills. She didn’t really want to come, but hearing the enthusiasm from Zay about his friends baby shower had really struck a chord in her heart that made her want to do something nice. A fancy baby shower where she had to wear a dress to fit in made her feel... wrong. This definitely wasn’t her crowd, and from the small appetizers that were being passed around, no one got the vegetarian memo, either. 

Her hair had been pulled into a low bun, pieces forming around her face. A dress wouldn’t do, but a delicate bright, white, lacy top with a pair of slacks that had most likely been only for job interviews seemed to suffice. She looked like she fit in. 

As she caught someone in the corner of her eye, she smirked at the man who had been making her smile quite a lot recently. Her eyes catching sight at the woman in his grip; she hadn’t formally met Sanem before, but knew what she looked like-- she had met Alli briefly, but... Aurora was new. “Nice to meet you, Aurora,” She licked her lips slightly, eyes dodging around Zay a bit as she found herself noticing an emotion that she hadn’t completely thought of before. Her mind raced a bit, but settled on light conversation. “I don’t-- uh, how long have you two known each other? I don’t recall your name being mentioned before.”

Of course it was fast– there was no place else he’d rather be! He might’ve run a stop sign or two, but there was no reason to admit that; unless a cop had been following him this whole time. Zay’s own dark eyes followed her movements; she seemed to be on edge. It felt as though his throat sunk into his stomach as he realized what was happening. We should just be friends. It had happened before and he had been fine with it but this time…

This time they had taken things a step further. This time, he wouldn’t be able to forget the way she looked, or the way she felt around him. It would be fine though. It had to be. “We don’t have to order anything. I don’t know if I’m really that hungry or just waking up anyway,” Zay confirmed. This way, he wouldn’t be stuck at her apartment waiting for a quesadilla to arrive. 

“Look, it’s–” a quizzical expression came over his face. She…had a good time? Genuinely? Zay looked down briefly, trying to process this information as fast as he could. “I had a good time too,” he looked back at her. “Did you want to do just…,” he lifted his hand up slightly, “that again? Or did you want…more?”

She didn’t want to deny him of food if he was hungry, knowing that he would definitely do just that-- go hungry, that is. Zay was a man that never really said what he liked or wanted, just to make sure that he wasn’t being a burden. Nel had to go out of her way to make sure that the man was at least taking care of himself on a basic level. “I can make you a grilled cheese if you get hungry, or like,” She shrugged, “Oatmeal. I have a lot of fresh fruit from the farmer’s market, if you’d like.” 

A tint of blush ravished her cheeks as she felt the inhale in her lungs start to feel more necessary. Her heart beat quickly, her eyes feeling like they couldn’t help but stare at the man in question. “Uh, well,” She marveled at the thought, wondering if he was thinking the same as she. “I don’t really have any plans for what I’d like to do with you,” Her hand guided it’s way to the man’s knee, placing her fingers at bits of the his jeans that indented towards his thigh. It became increasingly more difficult to hold herself back. “But I believe that asking for more is always valuable.” She swallowed, her words at whispers as she nodded slowly. 

Her lips turned into a smile as she wet them with her tongue, feeling anticipation rising in her chest. “This doesn’t change anything, right?” She reiterated, knowing that he’d answered this question before. She knew that it wouldn’t. They were best friends. They would do anything for one another. “I want to be able to walk around in my underwear just the same, but with a bit more sparkle in your eye,” She sheepishly smiled, “Not that it went unnoticed before. But you know what I mean.”

Zay: we can look at menus!

Zay: u got it. be there in 10!!!

“Do I not get here quickly normally?” he scrunched his brows and grinned. Isaiah knew the route from his place to Nel’s better than he knew his social security number. He could get to Nel’s from any spot in town if he needed to. Kicking his shoes off, Zay stepped past her and found his usual spot on the floor, knees cracking as he took a criss-cross position. “I was takin’ a nap before you texted,” a smirk. 

The air in the apartment felt nice but…different. Was he supposed to bring up what had happened between them? Or was he supposed to continue acting like her shadow, as he had been previously? “You cleaned?” It came out more accusatory than anything, but then again, how was it supposed to sound? “You sure you don’t want dinner, Nel? I was ready for you to suggest Indian food as usual.”

Why was she being awkward? She didn’t want to seem too forward, but she also wanted to crawl over to him in a fit of overzealousness after not seeing him for almost two weeks. It was hard to keep up her feelings, but she knew that something had to change. A discussion might make her feel better. “No, you’re usually over here quickly. I just-- it was pretty fast this time.” 

She stood by the hallway, with her hands tucked in her back pockets as she tried her best to just breathe in. Just play it casual, she thought. “I did clean, yes,” She rolled her eyes, a small laugh escaping through her lips. “I’m glad someone noticed.” Nel crossed her arms over herself, moving towards the man that sat on the ground by her sofa. The thought of food seemed to make her stomach turn, maybe recognizing that a man could make her nervous. “No, no dinner for me. I ate earlier, I’m not too hungry-- you can order food, though!” She sat comfortably next to Zay, her eyes looking to search on his expression for... anything. 

“I just want-- I think we need to talk about what... happened,” She hugged her legs into her chest, finding a bit of comfort in that. Her expression than recognizing that he may think she didn’t enjoy herself. “I mean-- I just wanted to say that I... had a good time.” Her eyes focused on him now, a smile etched on her face as she looked at the hair that dangled over his temples, wondering how it’d feel wrapped up in her fingers. “Let’s do it again soon?”

Zay was busy picking up overtime hours from all sorts of businesses. Stores that suddenly needed extra security on their cases, grandparents that locked their keys in the trunks of cars, it was absurd. But the money was nice. He was able to start a small rainy day fund in a jar, something he’d been wanting to do forever. 

The notification sound on his phone continuously went off and he groaned. His alarm wasn’t supposed to go off for at least another thirty minutes– he was only napping for…how long had he been down? A smile crossed his face when he saw the name. Nel. Wanting dinner?

He stared at the messages for what felt like an eternity. He wasn’t sure how to go about talking to her, not after what they did. But it was good! She had made him coffee the next morning! She kissed him to sleep! It was just…different.

Zay: hi!!!

Zayy: dinner would be cool. did you mean take out or a restaurant? 

Zay: eithers fine but i cant go to a restaurant in my jammies 

Zay: did u want me to come over??

The jingle on her phone next to her turned her head to the curb. She picked it up, recognizing the small emojis. Nel never put a name in her phone, only emojis that reminded her of the person the first time they met. In contrast, Zay’s emojis included the squid and baseball, which she couldn’t quite pinpoint the reasoning for. 

She smiled at his messages, biting at her lip as the cigarette in her fingers created a loom of smoke around her. 

Nel: let’s scratch dinner. im not hungry. 

Nel: unless you are?

Nel [typed, unsent]: maybe hungry foooorrrr........me? ;)

Nel [typed, unsent]: i know what i’m hungry for ;)

Nel: i would just like you to come over, dummy!

The air outside made her feel a lot more clear. The fog in her brain had dissipated a bit. Nel maneuvered her way back to her apartment quickly, trying to get the rooms ready for Zay’s attendance. Setting the diffuser in her space, a warm frankincense smell lifted the room. The coldness outside would mix with the scent nicely, she figured. Not that Zay would probably notice. She put her dirty clothes in her closet, underwear and bras not strung out all over the place like usual. Keeping it classy meant putting work away. 

The rap at the front door excited her for a second, then turned her heart upside down. She looked in the mirror, checking herself out before answering the door. “Hi,” She answered sweetly, “You got here quickly.”