βIf you promise to stay alive just a little bit longer I promise that we are going to make this world a place worth living in by any means necessary. I ainβt giving up. I swear.βΒ
Spotted in Clackamas, Oregon
The Bowery Presents
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Hole
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
Show & Tell
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taylor price
NASA
KIROKAZE
One Nice Bug Per Day

Kiana Khansmith

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Noah Kahan
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@haveihitanerve
βIf you promise to stay alive just a little bit longer I promise that we are going to make this world a place worth living in by any means necessary. I ainβt giving up. I swear.βΒ
Spotted in Clackamas, Oregon

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The command structure / ranking of the Justice League is actually super hard to understand from the outside, if you think about it. How many times have alien diplomatic missions arrived to meet with them, only to struggle to pick out who they should direct their communications toward? Sure, youβve got the Kryptonian, heβs big and flashy and recognizable across sectors. But thereβs an Amazonian princess standing next to him who looks dangerous and speaks like a royal. Youβve got an Atlantean king behind her, also royal, also dangerous. Youβve got a Green Lantern of the Sector with trace ion signatures from all the recent battles in nearby galaxies, and then β then β you have a man in black, shadowy armor who doesnβt introduce himself, who doesnβt speak or negotiate unless the others falter, yet ever single one of them looks to him as the conversation proceeds β checking, assuring, looking for guidance etc. is he the leader, then?
I was watching a quiz show with my parents tonight and at some point this question came up:
βWhich musical duo had a small success in 1957 with their single βHey, Schoolgirlβ under the name βTom and Jerryβ?β
I then had to explain to my parents why I knew the answer so quickly π¬
Rewatched Fast and Furious and genuinely we never see Brian and Dom in the same car unless it's for like reallly dangerous stuff- and in both instances that I can think of: (A- Brian saves Dom from the cops and B- Dom sends them both flying out of a building) the other one severely hates being in the car with them
So I'm just wondering what domestic life is like for them
Who drives?
Do they always have to take two cars?
Are they the worst back seat/passenger drivers?
If they do drive together does everyone else chose to drive in a separate car?
If they drive two cars constantly does that mean there's fights over who gets to drive with who?
I'm just so curious. They never drive together unless it's life or death and even then both of them love the thrill of being behind the wheel.
Anyway
did a rewatch recently and actually this question is answered in the films frequently idk why I didn't catch it-
overall Brian seems to be Designated Driver. idk why but he is.
And yes, I also wasn't wrong; they do take two cars for things when they can. Brian is only the designated driver when there are no other options (ie, Dom's car has been exploded and tossed off a bridge) or if they can only bring one car for any specific reason
ALSO important side note that's actually not relevant at all to this post: Brian can and has driven Dom's Super Special Baby Macho car- the car that he like specifically doesn't allow anyone else to drive- but generally the only time Dom drives both of them is if it's in That car and then otherwise Brian drives

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I finally Finished my fic Call Me Al that was meant to be a one-shot. Yay!!!
"Your plane just landed."Β Jim said, without greeting. Bruce checked his watch. "So it did." He agreed. He hadn't paid any attention to the time. Minutes were pointless to him, just then. None of it mattered. "Is there a reason you weren't on it?"Β Jim asked
people hating on the Romance in the Devil Wears Prada 2 and saying it distracted from the plot and 'why is a man' here don't seem to understand what the film makers were trying to do
like... my biggest issue with the first movie is the Romance. I hate wtv his name is boyfriend, and I don't like how he is portrayed as the Good Guy who gets the girl in the end
most people didn't.
Old Boyf represented Andy's Old Values that she was 'dismissing' in favor of jumping into this New World of high fashion and etc etc
the New Boyfriend isn't a representation of anything. He's just there, to show support and be a good foil and show that the Boyf does not have to mean anything, he is not an extention of her wills or Morals or Values- he has different ones than her (which we see very clearly during their argument and unlike Old B he understand her lashing out at him isn't because that's what she actually thinks but because she is hurting)- and he still stays and is supportive
I loved New Boyfriend and I think he was a very important part of the story.
back on my Devil Wears Prada stint-
Nigel and Miranda I'll never get over you
The way he is always there for her and does not care that she is ruthless and domineering and dismissive and hates everyone (she doesn't hate him) they are the very definition of "that's my wife!" without being romantic in Any Way
Andy tells Nigel he should 'stand up for himself' and tell Miranda what he wants because by now she owes it to him to give him something and Nigel just cocks his head at her and goes "Like you do? Like everyone else does?"
Because he sees Miranda and maybe that's why she keeps him distanced and maybe that's why she keeps him so close.
He sees how she's not On Top as much as everyone thinks- because they are constantly pushing and prodding and asking and shoving and needing needing needing and in order to stay On Top of them she needs to have all the answers and do all the things and soothe all the egos and Be The Top Person
She doesn't have to be that around him. Nigel says something and she knows she can simply agree because he will get it right. She doesn't have to perform around him, doesn't have to remind him of his place, doesn't have to give him anything. He's not leaving. He'll stay right at her side for as long as she needs and even after that.
"Have I taken you for granted?" Yes, just a little. But only because that is his role and only because he lets her. Because she deserves to not have to perform for one person (in a professional setting, she has her husband for others) and she deserves having him.
Edit: AND ALSO- the way he refuses to take anything from her to the point where he won't do the speech until she literally says i need you to do something for me because he cannot bring himself to take anything from her until she frames it in a way that makes it a favor to her instead of the other way around
Augh I could talk about them for hours they are my favorite duo ever I need them carnally.
I did Hal Loathes A Child but now we're gonna talk about Hal and his relationship with each of the Bat-Animals
Ace: Ace genuinely wants Hal dead and Hal wants Ace to be his best friend and they have a genuine and intense rivalry. I made a post about Dick hating Ace and Hal has along the same mindset. Ace is BRUCES dog and this Random Man who is taking up his Space and Time and sorta smells like him but not really is an Imposter and Should Not Be Trusted. Hal just wants the dog to love him, man
Titus: Titus and Hal are best of friends. The sort of relationship Hal wanted with Ace he gets with Titus. Imagine the most purest and truest forms of 'a boy with his dog' in any media and you will get what Hal and Titus have. Titus adores that man. He follows him around the Manor when he comes to visit, he does an adorable little 'woof' when he wants Hal's attention, his tail thumps against the floor aggressively whenever Hal looks at him, he is a goner for Hal and Hal frickin loves that dog. A big reason for it is because of Damian, because Damian wanted to show interest in his fathers newest 'fling' that wasn't going away and one of the ways he bonds with people is through animals, so. It's beautiful
Alfred(the cat): Alfred is hit or miss. Sometimes, if no one else is around, the cat will curl up on his lap and purr. Sometimes when Hal comes into the Manor after a really long and tiresome mission, he'll even wind himself around his legs in greeting. Sometimes. Hal isn't his favorite human by far, but he's a reliable one.
BatCow: BatCow has it out for Hal. In the same way Ace does but more like she's going to suffocate him with her affection. Hal steps one foot into the bat cave and immediately has to sprint for the stairs because otherwise a ten ton cow is running full speed at him and mooing like an overly excited puppy dog, about to slobber him full and sit on him until he physically fuses into her. She bites him. She licks him. That one dude on TikTok who tries (and fails) to cook with a cow in his kitchen? That's Hal and Batcow
Goliath: Goliath is like The Cool Cousin at family functions to Hal. He doesn't dislike Hal, he just doesn't put that much effort to be around him either. Sometimes they make eye contact and it almost looks like Goliath might not eat him and Hal swoons about it for a week.
Haley: Haley is Dick's dog and is not around Hal all that much, but she's just a lover. She is happy to see anyone no matter who, and Hal likes to think he's special but she just likes attention and as an Attention Whore himself, Hal is the one who gives it to her the most whenever Dick brings her to the Manor
I think that's the last of them... maybe. Anyway. That's Hal and the Batfam Menagerie. :P
EDIT: I CANNOT BELIEVE I FORGOT JERRY THE TURKEY AND THE RANDOM BIRD THING WHOS BREED I CAN NEVER SPELL CORRECTLY (macaw?)
Jerry the Motherflippin Turkey: Hal and Jerry have a vendetta against each other. A day does not pass where Hal does not threaten to turn him into sandwich toppings. Hal steps foot in the vicinity and Jerry lets out one, very soft, very threatening "berk" that promptly makes Damian lunge for his katana and Hal book it out of the vicinity again. They are constant and they are relentless and they had a fist fight once. "How do you fist fight a turkey, Hal?" "Shut up Spooky." "Better question, how do you lose a fist fight with a Turkey?" "Duke, no one asked your opinion." "He doesn't even have fists-" "Duke!"
The Macaw: I don't remember her name and for that I apologize but she and Hal vibin. She sits on his shoulder and he puts on a dumb pirate accent that makes Damian roll his eyes and then laugh and then scowl because he's mad about laughing and Hal feels like he just won the lottery. He gives her little treats and she learns to squawk his name and Hal is an avian master oh yea
I cannot believe I forgot about Jerry omfg
I forgot Jerry y'all I'm so sorry :(
who was gonna tell me I forgot Zitka. My mother flippin beloved I'm so sorry-
Zitka: Zitka the badass frickin Elephant. Zitka is one of the first animals Hal meets because she's there with Dick, and wow is she an interesting First Pet. He's awe struck, naturally. Deeply moved when he stands beside her the first time. Dick is bouncing around him as a lil eight year old who just got reunited with his best friend and Hal never thought he'd be able to so much as breathe around an elephant and here he is stroking her trunk. Zitka and Hal are Tight. (as tight as an elephant and human can be) Hal stays with her in the barn when she lives on Wayne Property and visits her in the zoo when he's In His Head and just wants Company without needing to talk/be talked at.
Welcome to Kinktober 2026!
its that time of year againnnnnn
if anyone has ideas/specific pairings+day they want to see, lemme know and I shall see if I find the motivation to write it!

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batlantern ideaaaaa
Old Man Bruce Wayne who is like late sixties/seventies and who hires New Recruit early twenties Hal Jordan to be his private plane pilot
Hal who flirts and is his usual Charming self with his elderly and loaded customers and always goes the extra mile with Bruce because Bruce so rarely smiles so when Hal does manage to get a chuckle out of him it feels soooo good
Bruce who is begrudingly fond of this young flighter who is so deeply pretty. Who gets jealous when Hal flies Lex Luthor and his plane gets "attacked" by Superman and Hal saves the day naturally with his skills and there's Lex on the news with his hands all over this young man who is beaming with the praise and clearly willing to take it from anyone
So a Bruce who is even quieter than normal when Hal flies him next and Hal who tries extra hard-
Until Bruce sticks his foot out and Hal suddenly lurches forward, stumbling, and Bruce's arm wraps like a vice around his waist, saving him from eating shit
Hal thinks he's just clumsy, babbles an excuse and swoons 'oh thank you!!!' and tries to get up but Bruce who holds him there
Bruce who undresses him slowly while purring praise and Hal who squirms as though he's aware its breaking all sorts of rules but is desperate for the recognition and stays so pretty and pliant in Bruce's arms
Bruce who fucks him slow and deep and growls "no one else. You're mine. No more flying other people." And Hal is getting the best fuck of his life so of course he babbles a yes and deeper please and of course and Bruce grunts with satisfaction, licking the tears from his cheeks
Hal, naturally, forgets about his Pleasure-Haze agreement and rent has to be paid so he flies Ollie the next week. Bruce is not pleased.
Hal spends the whole next flight sitting on Bruce's lap in the cockpit, Bruce's cock buried deep inside him.
"Be a good boy and keep my cock nice and warm, baby." Bruce purs in his ear. "Maybe, if you're good, I'll let you cum. But you're never disobeying a direct order again, understood?" And Hal whimpers out a yes.
Bruce who rolls his hips when Hal talks to the ground towers to ask permission to land and Hal who yelps and apologizes immediately
Old Rich Man Bruce and his arm candy pilot Hal
we're all aware that Art one hundred percent slept with Jack Nicholson right? Like... that's just a fact we all know, right? He totally did that. Like that's a leading reason for the Tension between him and Paul back then. Like they totally did that right. thats a thing we're all aware of
I'm just saying, if you're going to worldbuild magic being a "raw, primal force, akin to and interweaving with nature itself" you gotta explain to me why animals don't use it
I know the normal answer is "they just aren't smart enough for it" but idk I've seen enough media where a character uses a spell in a moment of brain-off panic ilI feel like animals could probably stumble into a spell or two like, accidentally
Also how funny would it be to see a completely normal regular bear cast magic missile outta nowhere
Also there is no way ravens wouldn't figure out spells, tbh
They're smart fuckin birds, I believe in them
Either through observing or just figuring shit out ravens could 100% learn how to cast spells I'm sure of it
Dogs can also cast Magic Missile but every time they do the projectile is shaped like a bone or a stick and they chase after it
group of wizards who ask this in-universe, and after extensive study learn to their surprise that animals are casting spells all the time, just that their magic is so fundamental as to be unrecognizable to humans. turns out the only reason acorns grow on trees is because squirrels keep wishing for them.
When a species becomes extinct humans have to figure out what kind of magic they were doing to keep the ecosystem from becoming out of balance
My darling Ao3ers. With all this Wattpad bullshit going on and the influx of people who don't understand what no censorship actually mean, it is our solemn duty to create disturbing, disgusting, positively unseemly writing for no other reason than to piss them off and prove that we can.
Get freaky my friends.
absolutely 100% on my knees for Kenneth and Joey being on stage with a litany of other musicians and every time- without fail- only making eye contact across the microphone with each other
either because they're finding a common note (ignoring the fact that they are across the stage and other people are singing in their ears and by default shouldn't actually be able to identify each others voice but obviously they can because its as interwoven into their ear canals as their own is) or just because its habit for them
will never not make me scream cry throw up I actually can't stand them they are my enemies they're too fucking cute I can't
prolonged eye contact will never not kill me, actually. never.

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terrible BatLantern where the League is introduced to Robin very early on and Dick calls Bruce "Mom" jokingly whenever he's being like Extra with his son and so Hal who thinks that Batman is actually a woman who just puts on a masculine air in order to be more intimidating because patriarchy and all that yk
And Bruce is a Feminist so naturally whenever Hal starts making comments being sympathetic to women and etc etc he agrees with whole hearted force because... duh??? and Hal just thinks he's supporting a female coworker
Not to mention that Bruce is really close with Zatanna and Diana and Dinah and they're refered to as "Girls Night Out" and like etc etc
So Hal who flirts with Bruce and Bruce who flirts back and eventually Hal kisses him and they have a good time
And then Bruce takes off the mask and Hal stumbles back and... he can't have been falling in love with a man this whole time that's not- that's-
"God forgive me." Hal whispers, before tangling his fingers in Bruce's hair and pulling him in for another kiss
"Just pretend I'm a woman. It's close enough." Bruce begs, desperately, before kissing him back
(guy who tags every single post as the same exact character) you know who this post reminds me of?