Descent Into Madness

‘everyone speaks latin, right? so let’s put a silent b in debt. like debitum, which is latin for debt. problem solved.’

also the reason why there is a h in ghost is because when the printing press first came to england the only people trained to operate it were flemmish speaking, and they put a h after g because that’s what you do in flemmish. they put shit like ghirl and ghoose, but the only reason why ghost stuck is because people saw ‘the holy ghost’ in the bible and were like ‘well, that MUST be right’.

Moses: A-aron, it’s g-good to see you!

the original tune is not this. the original tune is, however, public domain, so they’re not wrong. it’s francisco tárrega’s gran vals - check 0:12.

but THIS, what he’s playing, is the Valse Irritation d’après Nokia, also known as the ringtone waltz, written by Marc-André Hamelin, who is a terrific canadian pianist and who wrote this as a snap reaction to having people’s fucking cellphones go off at concerts.

here’s hamelin talking about it. and playing it himself.

and the instant i first heard the valse irritation, you know what i had to do, immediately, and what at least three other people i know also did?

fbi agent:

A resume doesn’t need to sound fancy or overly technical, it needs to tell us why we should hire you.

“Independent novelist/writer” is more than sufficient here. If you want to express the skills that fan fiction taught you, something like, “creative writing, editing, and publication,” will get you a lot further than… Whatever that just was.

A resume should be tailored to the position, if you can afford the time and energy for that. But if not, then just think about what writing got fandom taught you. How to respond to criticism, how to present a professional pubic face, how to correct punished mistakes, creative thinking, project planning, persuasion via emotional leverage, html formatting, office suite fluency.

Writer:

Published short fiction stories for anthology collection

Able to write short fiction within a designated word count for layout purposes (900-1500 words, 1500-2000, 3000-5000)

Wrote short articles for independent publication

Assisted with editing short stories for publication

Able to reduce or expand written content based on layout needs

Able to check for basic spelling, grammar and syntax

Familiar with Microsoft Office and Google docs

Artist:

Produced full-colour digital illustration for independent magazine

Able to produce digital illustrations optimized for both online and print display

Produced full-colour 2-page spread for art anthology

Published 4-page short comic in anthology collection for charity

Able to transfer traditional art to digital illustration

Illustrated the cover (always brag if you’re on the cover) of an independent art publication

Familiar with professional illustration tools such as Adobe Photoshop, Illustrator, Clip Studio Paint and stylus tablet

Merch artist / graphic designer:

Designed 2″ clear decorative double-sided keychain charm as bonus sale item

Designed 5″ x 6″ sheet of graphic stickers included in art anthology

Able to design bold graphics that are measured for laser cutting production

Designed layouts for 65-page art and writing magazine, focusing on (art placement, text layout, etc)

Able to keep layout design simple and in accordance with the project director’s chosen theme

Created promotional art, icons and banners tailored for social media sites like Twitter, Tumblr, Facebook, etc

Familiar with professional layout and design software such as Adobe Illustrator and InDesign

Running a zine

Produced an independent art and writing collection for sale / for charity

Managed (10, 20, 30) independent artists and writers out of over 500 applicants to create a short-run independent magazine

Worked in online sales and social media promotion selling an independent comics anthology

If it’s really spectacular you can brag about specific numbers

Our book raised over $4,000 for charity in under six months of production

We sold over 750 copies in two weeks of online sales

Produced a digital PDF and printed version of anthology, mailing to recipients all over the world

Communicated with printers and manufacturers of plastic accessories and paper goods, assembling professional packages of our merchandise for mailing.

Built a custom digital storefront and navigated professional market and payment systems including Paypal and Tictail / Bigcartel / Wix etc

Created promotional events to boost sales, including raffles and giveaways over social media

Organized participants through mass emails and use of social media posts on tumblr and twitter

HOW DETAILED THE BACKGROUNDS ARE 

HOW THE MOVEMENT FLOWS TRASCENDING PANELS MAKING THE ACTION SCENES MUCH MORE FLUID AND INTENSE

HOW THE FACIAL EXPRESSIONS CONVEY SUCH STRONG EMOTIONS

HOW THEY USE SYMBOLISM

HOW EVERYTHING LOOKS GORGEOUS AND BADASS AT THE SAME TIME