it almost definitely doesn't smell like cordite

Didn't realize they made emergency thermal blankets for babies

I reference this literally every time I'm at a bar because I somewhat convinced I saw it in a tumblr post somewhere but I have been informed that this is not in fact a known tumblr post in circulation and I was shown a prophetic vision at some point leading me to form the dichotomy from first principals

Time to FROLIC!

European goldfinch (Carduelis carduelis)

this post never fails to make me crave gummy orange slices

"you could just eat normal clementine slices?" NO! I want to eat ROCKS!

i like how all cats regardless of species can either look rlly badass and cool or just incredibly silly stupid

when we started talking about getting a small-breed dog I was like, "I will NEVER turn into one of those people who treats their little dog like a doll or an accessory by forcing them to dress up in ridiculous outfits. Dogs HATE that. They should get to be DOGS, and that means not having to wear anything but a HARNESS and being FREE to ROLL in the MUD." and then I adopted a dog who throws a fit if you try to take him for a walk without letting him pick out a bow tie first. a dog who loves wearing pajamas so much that I'm about to spend a disgusting amount of money on several sets of linen ones for summer. a dog who watches me wave at him to follow me through a mud puddle and just stands there blinking up at me like, "are you fucking serious? and get my paws wet?"